From KGB Wiki
Jump to: navigation, search

Officer Reports

Jared: Is the president and so is "In Charge". *saluted*. Always interesting to see reactions when he says "Ok. I have to go read the Bible/Koran".

Glisson: Is the first vice president. Did *this much homework*. Bought spore instead. Did half as much homework and did *this much spore*.

New People:

 Spencer. ECE. Connecticut. MMO addict!
 Nick. NJ. Mech-e. Guitar Hero Addict.
 Adam. MCS Math. New York. Top 200 X-Box Live rock band singing.
 Avi. Creative Writing. Pittsburgh. Likes to wear large shirts.
 Alan. Robotics. California. Climbed a redwood tree. I mean Is five seven. Grad student.
 cswan. Physics. Virgina. Rejected from TJ. Won the scavenger hunt. 
 Paul. DC. CS. Spore addict.
 Spencer. Creative writing. Pittsburgh. Guild leader for WoW.
 Ravhit. CS. Pittsburgh. Not in any CS classes.
 Josiah. Jboning. ECE. Northern Virgina. Doesn't own a computer! Has two kidneys!
 Samantha. Engineer. NJ. Has a twin.
 Ashley. Lift 135 pounds.
 Patrick. Mech-e. Ohio. 167 pounds on a good day.
 Taylor. Chem-e. Intro course is boring. Moving from NC to Ohio. Pretty bad at hand stands.
 Trevor. NJ. CS. Likes to sleep.

My spore character will kick yo characters ass.

Carolyn: EVENT! Get board get carded! Underground tour! Fun with power!

Nicole: Pravdas but there are not enough. Teach her how to get a PDF to print double sided more than once. Not enough Pravdas. Pravda is our news letter. Submit to it.

Drew: Has a duck. Don't say "Is that a duck in your pocket or are you just happy to see me".

Laura: Underground tour. Wicked is steam punk and awesome.

Liz: Weekend. Underground tour and awesomeness and homework. No homework until Thursday.


 Dimitri. Ohio. SCS. Brown Hair!


Pop occultism

 Focus on your long term goal. Good things will soon happen. Attend KGB events and PAY YOUR DUES.
 Prospect of a thrilling time ahead. But you'll go to get board get carded.
 Buy your time. Success is near. Expect in bed.
 Move to a wonderful new home within the year. Western psych?
 Career is moving towards service to others. "Service"
 A fateful friend is a strong defense. Normally bullets won't go through them.
 Success will astonish everyone. At get board get carded.
 Treasure what you have. Like, $1.50 in copper. Or is it zinc?
 Only sure thing about luck is it will change.

Want a report on the reconstructive facial surgery on Dr Quuxum's face.

 Took a razor to his face.

Assassins Committee

 Glisson has me as a target. Only know who my target is. Glisson wants to his me with a sock. Which he does. Now I am dead.
 Carolyn wants to kill Glisson. More explaining. 15 people expressed interested. Email him.

Committee to get Dr Quuxum to buy more committees. Did share beard. Will be selling it at useless stuff auction.

ITR Committee: Saturday. 10pm. Very happy.

Glue Shirt to Vincent: Please, oh god, not Quuxum's beard.

KGB Saints Committee Considers adding to is relic collection.

ESG: Different kind of weird shit. Tonight: Free Masonry.

Point of information: Free masonry for rent or e-bay!

Story Telling Committee:

 Octopus story. Bite it between the eyes!

Old Business

Todd gets the pfenning. Freshmen are not his fault.

New Business

Motion to create an allocation not to exceed $50 for event. Good idea

Motion to create the hamster-lazer-disco-clock committee. Make a clock that runs on hamsters and lazers. To synchronize hamsters and lazers.

 Changed to Synergize hamster lazers.
 Put a lazer in every hamster.
 Hamster cybernetics.
 In Favor: fire your lazers!.
 Opposed: Shoop-da-whoop!
 Abstain: Act like a hamster.
 $3 Everyone from Phys 3 to chair.

Motion to create the middle committee. Purpose is its shear elegance and simplify.

 Move to rename to the infix committee.
 Postponed indefinitely.

Motion to create the Wolf, Wolfe, and Woof committee. No second.

Motion to create the some committee about goop.

 Sounds disgusting
 Miss-appropriate postulate soup instead of air: why?
 Motion to change to soylent goop-box
 Don't confuse goop with goob.
 Soylent goop is goob!
 In favor: Soylent green line!
 Opposed: Complain about how overused soylent green line is.
 Abstain: Porno squid!.
 Failed. But we want money to say it passed.
 $5 to Shawn and Dom and Greg and Goob.


 Dave. Chem. NJ. Black shoes.

Back to new business!

Motion to create the unintelligible committee. Purpose:

 Bob Dillon Memorial Committee reports success.
 Debate between mumble and unintelligible?
 In favor: *unintelligible*
 Opposed: rational argument.
 Abstain: Be irrational.
 Sells for $10. Disbanded!


Carolyn: Event! *this* one is fun! Friday! Porter A18*.


Shawn: Is Shawn. Freshman in 1991. In May 2009 getting bachelors. Freshmen were in upper 10%. Not anymore. Learn sooner rather than later. Don't be afraid to ask your friends to help. We're all in the same boat. Don't be afraid to ask your professors for helps. Most of them are not dicks. Ask older people/officers for help when they are not freaking out about help when they are not freaking out over their own classes. If you need to take a break. Take a break. Talk to people. Have fun. They tell you this is going to be the best few years of your life. It is. Hopefully you are gonna graduate within 5 years.


 Anthony. CS. Missouri.


 Drew: LARP!
 Glisson: DnD one shot.
 ntr: Dance show. 
 Carolyn: ITR Games 10:PM Saturday. 4th floor wean.
 Rocketmatt: Rocketclub. Tuesdays. Blow shit up. Eat pizza.
 More LHC
 Ben Wolf: Don't call be Ben Wolfe