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Officer Reports

               Have a weekend
               Doesn't have class until tomorrow at noon
               Had an omlette for breakfast
               Had a weekend
               I AM THE MAN IN THE WELL
               Pep band
               New People!
                   Andrew, ECE from Arkansas, wears size 12 shoes
                   Steven, high schooler from pittsburgh, everyone in high school knew him as shelby's brother
               Still having a weekend - it ends in June or so
               Is not really a lazy bum
               Made a shitload of pizza - truly ungodly amounts, over 9000
               EVENT! Tool Training!
               Still having a weekend
               Had a class today, unfortunately
               Looks like a grad student while shopping
               Still doesn't have enough stuff for pravda
               submit to pravda
               Went to the event - snowball fight
               Played DnD, failed at diplomacy
               Went to the event
               Lost a glove and would like it back
               Went to a Beatles tribute band - there were lots of drugs
               Did a little bit of her first ever CS assignment
               Is not taking 251
               One of his friends visited, she came to the event, it was awesome
               Booth stuff - tool training is this week

Committee Reports

         MLK Assassinations joke from Assassinations Committee
         Shawn & Quuxum committee says FUCK THE JETS GO STEELERS
         Request report from Booth Committee
         Booth Committee is prepared for tool training, has some slightly better drills - wears closed toes shoes
         ITR Committee says ITR on saturday at 10pm on wean 4
         Fortune-Telling fish committee reports tool training will leave no survivors
         Culinary R&D Committee reports SUCCESS
         251 Torture Committee reports the scav hunt went correctly
         Time Travel Committee reports you all the best of luck on finals
         Pop Occultism committee makes fortune cookie jokes
         Storytelling Committee tells a story about the Piraha tribe in the Amazon and their language

Old Business

   Starbucks adding a larger size is not Eforney's fault

New Business

   Rename this event to screwing for screwing's sake
   Create the Formal Allegations Committee to, while adhering to the strictest forms of ettiquette, turn people into alligators
          Append to purpose to dress up alligators in tuxes
          Sold to afalk, chairs her and anyone who enjoys reptiles in tuxedos
   Create the We are the men in the well committee to I AM THE MAN IN THE WELL
          "Blue" now means $8
          Sold to tvaughan for $9, chairs him and anyone else in the well
   Create the Pluto is still a president, and there are still 12 zodiac signs to what the fuck there are 13 and I'm not a pisces
          Afalk explains why this change is stupid
          Change purpose to "Screw science, what I knew as a child is correct"
          Sold to Shawn for $3, chairs him and anyone who's an effiacus
   Create the Don't Worry About It committee to Listen, don't worry about it
          Sold to tbroman for $10, chairs him and anyone who would really like to not worry about it
   Allocate $50 for the event - it's a good idea
   Create the Itty Bitty Kitty Committee to Meow
          Hats, Kitties, Hats and Kitties, Hats Hats Kitties Kitties Hats and Kitties
          Sold to mcginnis for $5, chairs him and tell you the rest later


       Event! Tool Training! Kage at 700 or UC black chairs at 645
       Puzzle hunt this semester we promise
       Useless People email to shawn


       No shmucks!