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Officer reports

jboning -graded 410 stuff = pretty cool -art museum pun

eforney -was off in Latin Land -9 hours -no new noobs -election campaign puns -John Boehner = from West Chester, OH, her hometown

zsparks -pretty good I guess -board games -bar -buggy -not sleep -IU vs. Northeastern for grad school -astronaut pun

Arsenij -mostly uneventful -reading and essays and tragedy -zombie apocolypse/Hell pun -SUBMIT TO PRAVDA?

twright -sick :( -Thomas looks a lot like Xander -coughed up lungs -worked on Booth -Hillel -Ruthless pun

scorri -people at scorri's door -maintenance doods -there's a breaker box in scorri's room oh god... --there's mass potential here --current affairs --watt are you talking about? -nerf guns and boffer swords forever -boffer we couldn't reuse pun -coins

Bubbles -YEAHHHHH -24 hour play festival! -Sammy Jelin fell asleep in the shower -witnessed the aftermath of the bank robbery we were alerted of via CMU alert --getaway bus? taxi? what's the best vehicle here? -New York Times article pun

Committee Reports

Shawn & Quuxum Variety Hour w/ Shawn -new office on Craig St. for Shawn who has been here forever --no more corner office :( -tape drives ruh roh

SUPER w/ eforney -Patrick White, Midway chair, says our booth chairs are super legit

Booth w/ kharring -we have a floor! --well almost all of a floor -look at the bboard, we're doing stuff over break -art meeting on Tuesday IN THE KAGE IN 8PM (note the changes)

Most Dangerous w/ tbroman -twright won the game!

Guild of Calamitous Intents w/ Jared -submit manifestos to Pravda?

Ad Hoc Perform A Play in 24 Hours (and Lose Your Voice in the Process) w/ Drew -success

251 w/ Drew -oops... check your email

Gratuitious Obscenities (in Foreign Languages) w/ Xander -Icelandic swears

Ad hoc (the same) w/ Colombo -French: I am a pineapple

Sigbovik w/ zsparks -totally serious conference on April 1 -send any papers due Mar. 13 --there's also a second deadline -sigbovik.org

Seek and Replace Ravenstahl for Jcreed w/ Quuxum -sigbovik is cool

Unicode w/ Quuxum -wtf Grat. Obscenities? -are we taking notes in unicode?

Always Late to Kiltie w/ Kelly -free concert, Rangos, 7pm

Storytelling w/ Arsenij -stroytelling? -story of the roses at improv night this year -Arsenij et al passed out roses -in Russia, they ban Valentine's Day -in Japan/Korea, girls give gifts to boys, boys respond to girls a month later --then singles eat noodles 2 months later -Italy, girls creep on people out their windows -different flowers... --Marigold: I like money --Lavender: I distrust you --Gladiolas: strong character --Daffodils: chivalry --Daisies: innocence --Liliacs: first love ---(liliac's disease?) --Roses: different based on color! ---black: death, hatred, I own you ---red: (1) just to you, (2) mutual love, (108) marry meee! ---yellow: friendship, we're cool, unrequited love ---purple: I loved you at first sight, majesty, enchantment ---white: (what Arsenij gave out) innocence, purity, typical wedding flowers, I'm sorry, I'm worthy of you, I miss you

single white rose: PURE LOVE! What Arsenij feels for all of us :D
withered: no impression on me...

Pop Occultism w/ Shawn -fortune cookies --1: remember, if you open a cookie w/o a fortune, you have a future but it's yours for the taking --2: no paper? no future!

Shawn & Quuxum w/ Quuxum --blank? watch out for match game music (3 people got that?)

Old Business

Pfennig of Pfault -goes to Dan Kirby -not bank robberies are his fault -all else is

New Business

Becoming Dragon: An Underdog Story w/ Drew

  • Purpose: feed ourselves to servants

-Mary can't run for president, she was born in Denmark --she is an alligator

  • For: make an inside jokes
  • Opposed: laughter
  • Abstain: go to show next year, fools! (Time-Travel reports success)
  • Auction: (jbonaparte reports success) $4 to Tim Vaughan
  • Chairs: Kuricks

KALIMA!!! w/ Jared

  • Purpose: rip out hearts through chests, light them on fire

-finish him! -Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

  • Purpose:
  • For: KALIMA!!!
  • Opposed: laugh like Eckhart
  • Abstain: squid
  • Auction: $5 to Jared
  • Chairs: KALIMA!!! (anyone who wants to shout that)

Markov Generated Pravda? w/ Klipper

  • Purpose: let some of Pravda? be Markov generated to sound like KGB members

-just get Sourbot to talk -Sourbot: stfu -where's Markov? -Pravda? Watson Edition! -Markov... POLO!

  • Name Change: Sourbot Committee?

-not friendly, not pursued

  • For: say something Sourbot might say
  • Opposed: say something coherent
  • Abstain: get Quuxum's pun late
  • Auction: $6 to Quuxum
  • Chairs: Ben Wolf and Quuxum

Committees of the Annals w/ tbroman

  • Purpose: cite KGB presidents that everyone else has forgottens
  • Name Change: ...let's change one character...

-not friendly, not pursued -Sully is a big troll -objection: some of us our old -motion to puppies, totally doesn't work -motion to make the out of order committee -motion to purple! -it became winter

  • For: do something KGB-esque
  • Opposed: do something unprocedural
  • Auction: $11 to tbroman
  • Chairs: anyone who wants to change the name to Committee of the Anals

For the Theory and Practice of Oligarchic Collectivism w/ Shawn

  • Purpose: ignorance is strength, freedom is slavery, war is peace

-double plus good -computer is your friend -stack grows down -war != peace else Tolstoy wrote a trivial novel

  • For: Russian novels
  • Opposed: British novels
  • Abstain: other novels
  • Auction: $2 to scorri
  • Chairs: everyone!

Has That Ever Stopped Us Before? w/ Sully

  • Purpose: see name

-one day... it should actually stop us -POSTPONED INDEFINITELY! OWNED!!!

allocation: $50 for food for the event -it's a good idea

some crazy shit is going down like postponing Sully

Shenanigans w/ Arsenij

  • Purpose: random shenanigans and extensibly true but mostly false purposes afterwards

-this = gen body

  • Rename: Martin Luther Memorial Committee

-not friendly, pursued --didn't win -committee to propogate random art on campus -snowth: shen-nan-i-gans! do do dodo!

  • For: make an auction bid
  • Opposed: what's the purpose?
  • Abstain: vote!
  • Auction: $14 to Arsenij
  • Chairs: Arsenij and anyone who wishes to participate in shenanigans

You're Issues Are Showing w/ Shelby

  • Purpose: unveil people's deep-seeded psychological defaults

-James Colmar approves -Alex Falk: my shit is way tormented -hypothesis: never report on Pravda? - those issues are never showing -MONOLOGUING IS TOTALLY NORMAL -what do you call someone who leads weird groups and screams through traffic cones? -salute Glisson -want a lifelong subscription?

  • For: hands!
  • Opposed: other hands!
  • Abstain: JAZZ HANDS!
  • Auction: $14 to $15! (actually $14 to Alex Falk)
  • Chairs: myself and anyone else whose shit is way tormented


EVENTS w/ zsparks -Movie Night this Friday -bring movies

Shawn's committees go to Quuxum

Booth -art meeting Kage, 8pm Tues.

CtFwS -let's poster (see bboard or make a new one!), it's march 18!


Red Bull? -talk at judges' meeting?

GEagle adventure -ping dbesse@ -second Saturday of spring break

let jvirdo dye your hair! -ping jvirdo@

2 of spades on the cieling!

Rocky Horror -first saturday of break! -ping Klipper

zsparks has tooly hair

Roselawn 7 party -falls on a Jewish holiday called Purim -ALLLLL THE DRINKING -manage your risk, dudes