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Officer Reports

       Had a break!
       and a Christmas
       got gifts, including a giant candy cane
       avoided being assassinated
       Had a break!
       did a lot of nothing and some of some things
       did booth plans
       saw Book of Mormon - friend had extra ticket, invited him on the day of
       got hipster glasses, not because he's a hipster; he's just wearing them ironically
       went food shopping
       new people (name, major, where from, uninteresting fact):
           Amanda, CS/Drama, Seattle, owns footie pajamas (too interesting) - drinking a latte
           Lisa, BHA undec/art, NJ and Russia, under peer pressure
       looks like egarbade
       had a break - doesn't remember it because it wasn't with egarbade
       EVENT! Potluck/Trivia Night. Friday, 7pm, PH A18*
       has a Pravda?! None of it written by her!
       Had a break!
       It was slightly subpar
       Missed KGB
       Approximate number of times "this should go into my first KGB officer report of the semester" crossed his mind: 7
       Number of times the above thought was referring to something that made it into this report: 0
       Had a break!
       it was long
       it involved watching tv and a lot of booth near the end (ours and carnival committee)
       almost bought Bubbles a Forever Lazy, but lucky she didn't cuz he still got one
       Booth season. We need y'all to pay for committees and stuff
       forgot everything
       had a break
       Christmas involved
       caught up in video game world
       got Skyrim and two other games
       started working on a game called Rocket Penguin
       and something else
       bought nerf guns

Committee Reports

   Booth Committee: art meeting this wednesday at 7, PH A18A, Tool Training is next Friday
   The Dn Kirby is Full of Himself Committee, in conjunction with the misappropriated Dan Kirby Nightmare Dreamland Committee and the Gratuitous Obscenity Committee's Special Select Subcommittee for the Research and Development of Rule 34, reports: over break, went to a nightclub in seaside heights (Jersey Shore filming location)
   The ad-hoc Committee for Bowling Over Small Children While Sledding reports: the new high score is 450 points
   The Space Travel Committee tells a story about going to Philly but ending up in Trenton...
   The Subtle Racism Committee notes that we have roughly 3/5 of the day off for MLK Day
   The Portalmanteau Committee, in conjunction with the Meteorology of Style Committee, the Evil Twin Committee, the Committee to turn Exec into Robots, the misappropriated Conspicuous Crossover Committee, the misappropriated Time Mafia Committee, the misappropriated Don't Worry, It's for Science Committee, and the Guild of Calamitous Intent, reports: tbroman is now a cyberman
   The Martin Luther Memorial Committee approves of the previous for bringing about the master race
   The ad-hoc Anti-Discrimination Committee took action for MLK day: mixing salt and pepper packets at restaurants
   The Fortune-Telling Fish Committee reports: 2012 will be the year you are very glad you invested in all those eels
   The Committee to Use KGB as a Groundhog for Winter reports: maybe it will finally get some action
   The Cthublic Transportation Committee reports: one flight cancelled due to tentacles on runway
   The Conspicuous Crossover Committee wants to celebrate MLK day by attacking Christians
   The Dan Kirby is So Full of Himself Committee: Dan bought egarbade a piece of My Little Pony bling in a troll attempt... he wears it proudly
   The ad-hoc Separate but Equal Committee: Steven put the salt on one table and the pepper on the other...
   The Suspicious Financial Judiciary Committee asks the Fortune-Telling Fish Committee: how much of a share do you have in the eel market...
   The I Grew Up in Alabama Committee says oooooohhhh yeah
   The Committee to Explain Xander's References reports: It was a Brutal Legend reference. It was a Brutal Legend reference. It was a season 2 Simpsons reference. It was a Name of the Wind reference. It was a Harry Potter reference (hidden). It was a Booth reference. It was a D&D reference. It was a Brutal Legend reference. It was a Brutal Legend reference. Next time: day 2 of winter break.
   The CMU Hates Grass Committee reports: it took logging into 6 computers before finding one with duplex printing
   The Committee about Weird Things Concerning Little Asian Girls reports: dmeng's mom wears size XS in US, XL in Asia
   The I Date a Little Asian Girl Committee reports: oooooohhhh yeah
   The Awkward Silence Committee has its moment 
   The ad-hoc Separate but Equal Committee notes that this statement also describes every math equation
   The misappropriated Small Asian Girl Committee, in conjunction with the Fonzie Committee, reports: ayyyy
   The ITR Committee reports: ITR this Saturday! 10pm, Wean 4 couches. Come early and make new daggers!
   The misappropriated 251 Torture Committee reports: oh god it starts tomorrow
   The Antipenultimate Frisbee Committee (kharring) reports: fuck no
   The ad-hoc 451 Torture Committee reports: you poor souls, you don't even know
   The Antipenultimate Frisbee Committee (acrichto) reports: maybe
   The ad-hoc/misappropriated Committee for People in Dietrich records a laugh at 251 people
   The bswolf Memorial Committee tells a pun: better training
       baptism: testing the waters (of Christianity)
       mole asses joke
   The Sum Ess Ess Sum Estes Sum Committee reports: president of something Latin-related told the mole asses joke onstage and got kicked out of office

Old Business

   dkirby gives the Thing to Marlena. Not her fault: weather

New Business

   create the Consistent Continuity Committee to ensure that for all Doctor Who-related committees, Daleks are bid instead of dollars
       motion to change the word "daleks" in the purpose to "time" (no)
       the Owned Committee reports: owned
       objection: Doctor Who doesn't carry money
       motion to change the purpose to "make sure people don't change clothes between shots" - appended
       motion to append to the purpose "and to avoid stock footage" - appended
       vote: passes with purpose "to ensure that for all Doctor Who-related committees, Daleks are bid instead of dollars; make sure people don't change clothes between shots, and to avoid stock footage"
       sold $1 memcginn, chairs: all 13 of him
   create the Floor is Lava Committee to inform the general populace when the floor is about to turn into lava
       (everyone jumps up off the floor)
       nobody said eforney says...
       what if we're firebenders?
       the ad-hoc tvaughan is Not Here Committee comments: you can ice skate on the lava
       a reference the recsec does not understand goes here
       the ad-hoc Dungeonmasters Committee points out: even if you are not immersed in lava, you still take fire damage just by being near the heat
       the ad-hoc Somebody Will get This Committee: fire shields in sonic 3 usually protect you...
       Minecraft reference here
       we purple
       vote: passes
       sold $6 egarbade, chairs: everyone but tbroman
   create the Committee to turn Martin Luther King Day into Christmas to "Because I had a dream about it"
       so MLK is Jesus? (no, Santa)
       are we required to eat Chinese? (yes, if you're Jewish)
       "I don't want to have to do christmas today" -Scorri's typo
       sacunnin: I have a Dreamcast!
       tbroman: the Subtle Racism Committee moves to change the name of the Useless People Auction back to the Slave Auction (out of order)
       twright: a room full of white people and a few Asians is changing a holiday about a black man to one about an old white man
       sacunnin: I have a Dreamsicle!
       why snow gotta be white anyways?
       sacunnin: I have a dreamland!
       motion to create the Out of Order Committee
       so then Christmas turns into MLK day
       sacunnin: I have a dream within a dream within a dream ...
       vote: passes
       sold $4 tbroman, chairs: Bubbles and Scorri
   create the #defined Twice Committee to interpret Twitter hashtags as IRC channels and vice versa
       can hashtags be turned to hashbrowns?
       at the website tweetstats.com/trends: rihanna something
       precedent: anti-second a motion
       vote: passes
       sold $4 pcd, chairs: him
   allocate $50 for the event - it's a good idea
   allocate $200 for initial supplies for Booth
       do we have all the power tools we need?
   create the Blatant Racism Committee
   acrichto: ROLL TIDE
   create the Willy Wonka Bait and Switch Committee to that candy cane looks a lot like that umbrella...
       if you hold the candy cane outside in the rain it dissolves
       the Spoken Song Lyrics Committee reports: I'll take you to the candy shop...
       JACK'S VAN
       Willy Wonka invited kids to his magical factory and then did horrible things to them
           they signed a waiver it's fine
       motion to append to the purpose "replacing instances of Johnny Depp with Gene Wilder" - friendly
       vote: passes with the purpose "that candy cane looks a lot like that umbrella...; replacing instances of Johnny Depp with Gene Wilder
       sold $2 marlena, chairs: anyone who can remember at least two lines from one of the songs from one of the movies
   create the Clyde has 4 Arms Committee to Clyde has 4 arms
       eforney: it's highly appropriate that my Sergeant at Arms now has extra arms
       and now bubbles has 4 eyes (not friendly)
       mmeyerho: (gives Clyde a nerf gun) now he has 5 arms!
       Clyde: 4 arms or forearms?
       can we call him Dr. Clydopus?
       does this mean clyde has the right to bear arms? (Yes!)
       How does the Good League of Good feel? (good)
       Dr. Clydopus makes me think of a platypus
       insects have 6 legs; spiders have 8
       motion to change the name and purpose of the committee to the Executive Redundancy Committee to 4 arms 4 knees 4 eyes 4 eyes ... you're next (withdrawn)
       kharring: wearing contacts and glasses at the same time is really trippy
       if we watch James Bond, can we call him Clydopussy?
       vote: passes
       sold $6 memcginn, chairs anybody related to the number 4 somehow


   EVENT! Potluck/trivia night. PH A18*. 7pm friday
   come to exec if you're interested in officer positions (recommended)
   Booth art meeting, Wednesday at 7.
   Tool Training a week from Friday
   Useless People Auction is the first Friday in February


   Nerf Assassins! email dkirby
   read dkirby's Kesden fanfic
   gswagner looking for players for d&d
   gswagner flying for lunch sometime soon
   ITR! Saturday, 10, wean 4 couches. Come early and make daggers
   we purple
   amckinni wants a Distributed partner
   Rocket Club is awesome. Meets on tuesdays, 4:30. DH A level physics: A210?
   making APIs for CMU data is happening. Hackathon Feb 10-11. food better than pizza
   we gtfo