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Officer Reports

       weekend crazy
       omg loves everyone
       omg get me the fuck out of this school right now
       Had a weekend!
       it involved CtFwS
       played Mash in the judges room during game 3
       buddy from home came to visit
       R7 party was cool
       did all the work on sunday
       new people
           Marie, Florida, ECE, reads a lot
           Aaron, math, New Jersey, his fact is uninteresting
       Had a weekend!
       mostly sick, but that was ok
       helped stock things for party, got a $1 milkshake
       event: movie night. Bring movies. There will be voting systems.
       Had a weekend!
       CtFwS - lots of running around, saw some flags but didn't capture any
       Saturday - lots of sitting pretending to do work, r7 party - lots of scritches
       Sunday - lots of sitting pretending to do work
       now has to actually do work, it's kind of annoying
       spring break coming up
       Had a weekend!
       It was sweet.
       CtFwS was awesome, and went pretty well.
       Tape-measure-lengthening competition during Booth build
       R7 party, barrels of fun and other things
       No work on Sunday - wanted to play Halo with people, but everyone else in the house had work... *sigh*
       had a weekend
       similar to others', except Broman's
       did stuff, then more stuff
       capturing flags, r7 party, build, cleaning up, stuff
       had a weekend
       CtFwS was in his weekend
       shared weekend experience
       didn't go to a party; was doing 150
       went grocery shopping, now has food in his fridge/is an adult
       then impulse-bought a riot shield on Amazon

Committee Reports

   The ad-hoc Totally a Normal Member of Society Committee reports: I now think it's normal to throw money at the treasurer and call it fundraising...
   The ad-hoc I've Got a Lot of Catching Up To Do Committee and the Spoken Song Lyrics Committee report: this is a song for the ladies (twright)
   The Red Team Committee reports one count success, 2 counts failure
   The Fortune-Telling Fish Committee, in conjunction with the Committee to use the KGB as a Groundhog for Winter, reports: the prophecy is finally come true, Pittsburgh broke spring before spring break (angibson)
   The Committee to Bring Shank to Campus reports massive failure, partial success (Shank)
   The ad-hoc Graceful Aging Committee reports: gwillen is oldest person here (gwillen)
   The misappropriated Committee to Not Burn Down Roselawn 7 reports: potatoes on the ceiling
   The Time Cube Committee reports something
   Point of information: were any of those flavors Rocky Road?
   The ad-hoc Pittsburgh Natives Committee: will any of exec be here next Monday to run a meeting?
       no meeting next week
   The Committee to Get Drunk Off of Birthday Cake reports success
   The Fence-Painting Committee reports: actually you can destroy a laptop keyboard with a lamp
   The ad-hoc Committee of Noticing Things reports: airplane in the ceiling
   The ad-hoc False Flag Operation Committee reports massive success
   Nomcom does nominations
   The ad-hoc Sitting Committee reports failure
   The Dan Kirby is Full of Himself Committee reports: he did not nominate himself for anything... (dkirby)
   The Dan Kirby is Full of Himself Committee reports success!
   The misappropriated Dan Kirby is Full of Himself Committee notes: he also declined nomination for something!

Old Business

   mbritton keeps it. not his fault: the breaking of spring

New Business

   create the Hobbit Reminiscience Committee to dude, we should totally get the Fellowship back together!
       yo remember that time we found all that treasure? aww man...
       this committee SHALL NOT PASS!
       your love of the hobbit's leaf has weakened your mind
       hobbitses hobbitses hobbitses
       whoa man aren't you glad that giant spiders are scared of elf flashlights?
       the only brew for the brave and true comes from a green dragon
       the misappropriated KGB A Cappella Choir reports success
       have you ever noticed their hands are like whoa when did a ring get on my finger
       one does not simply walk into Mordor... it's too hot
       the ad-hoc Wrong Reference Committee says: the cake is a lie
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Conspicuously High Hobbit Reminiscience Committee - unfriendly
       motion to change the name of the committee to the High Hobbiton Committee - friendly
       vote - passes as the High Hobbiton Committee
       sold - $3 tvaughan, chairs him, anybody else who wants to get the fellowship back together
   create the Tostitos Committee - to T-t-t-tostitos!
       can you repeat that in song?
           (yes, he can)
       the ad-hoc Blatant Racism Committee says: that
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Low-Quality Racism Committee - friendly
       the ad-hoc Committee to See Alex Make Funny Noises approves
       always remember your racism was made by the lowest bidder
       the ad-hoc R7 Synesthesia Committee sees Alex make funny noises all the time
       vote - passes as the Low-Quality Racism Committee
       sold $2 twright, chairs him and everyone who recognizes letting thomas chari racism is a bad idea
   create the Committee to steal Clyde Shaffer's Identity, to as stated
       you know that his social security # has a 4 in it
       cshaffer's SSN is ***-**-****
       the Guild of Calamitous Intent approves
       the misappropriated Apathetic League of Neutral Switzerland is going to sit back and watch what happens
       the Clyde's Bonnie Committee asks: who have you been all this time?
       it's simple - we steal the Batman's personal identity
       I see Clyde, but who's the smurf?
       what if we accidentally steal Australia in the process?
       have you ever seen Clyde and Australia in the same room together?
       vote: passes
       sold $3 memcginn, chairs cshaffer, whoever he happens to be
   create the Ad Hoc Add Guac Committee to Kelly and to add avocado dip to other committees
       the Oh Shit What Have We Done Committee would like to make sure we never add guac to a hawk
       what are you talking abou?t why wouldn't we?
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Committee to Give Kelly More Guac - unfriendly, passes
       the Arrested Pursuit Committee reports unwanted success
       the Time Cube Committee asks: any other spices? (yes)
       motion to append guacamole to the purpose (not the word, some actual guacamole) - friendly
       motion to change the purpose to "to wean Kelly off the color purple using guacamole" - no second
       the Ad Hoc Block Committee reports, if you take away someone's avocado, it's a guac block (Xander)
       report requested from the Low-Quality Racism Committee - t-t-t-t-tostitos! (acrichto)
           man it's so like those south-central asians to like guacamole
       vote: passes as the Committee to Give Kelly More Guac with purpose "Kelly and to add avocado dip to other committees; guacamole (not the word, some actual guacamole)"
       sold $3 twright, chairs him and everybody amused by that
   create the Dubstep Entertainer C to wub wub wub wub
       postponed indefinitely
   create the Game of Quantum Thrones Committee to measure the Stark effect
       you won! ...or did you?
       in the game of thrones, you win or you die. or both.
       if you put Spock in a box with radiation, does he still like guac?
       if you land on a square with a chute on it, you go all the way back to the start
       would Schrodinger be the villain?
       motion to stop talking about science
       vote: passes
       sold $2 amckinni 
   create the Committee to Keep Talking About Science to iron, americium, ruthenium, uranium, europium, zirconium, lutetium, vanadium, And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium...
       new math... new math
       the ad-hoc tbroman Hates Fun Committee is surprised
       if you're wondering, new math happens after 2am
       the ad-hoc Committee of Artists Against Science says, that kind of science is OK
       remember, infinity is only six feet away
       the Don't Worry, It's for Science Committee disapproves
       the ad-hoc Scientists Against Art Committee asks: what's wrong with us?
       the ad-hoc Poets Committee says WORDS!
       na na nananana just a boring square
       the Oh Shit What Have We Done Committee is surprised at the Don't Worry, It's for Science Committee
       save conversation for art vs science
       what happens when art and science war?
       vote - passes
       sold $2 tbroman, chairs filibusterers
       broman removed from duties temporarily
   create the Giant Banana Comittee to giant banana (sacunnin)
       unrelated... the Jbonaparte Committee approves (angibson)
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Giant Banana Float Committee - unfriendly, fails
       point of information: I live in a giant bucket
       motion to append eforney in a banana costume to the purpose - friendly
       how does this committee feel about hammocks? 
       the Spoken Song Lyrics Committee reports: it's peanut butter jelly time
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Emily Forney Memorial Committee, Formerly Known as the Giant Banana Committee - friendly
       the ad-hoc Conspiracies Committees: are the names of these committees as big a foreshadowing as the title of Death of a Salesman?
       vote: passes as the Emily Forney Memorial Committee, Formerly Known as the Giant Banana Committee
       sold $5 sacunnin, chairs DISBANDED
   allocate $50 for snacks for event - it's a good idea


   event!movie night! 7pm friday, DH1212
   booth build wednesday, 7pm. Maybe Saturday? Maybe not.
   pay for Useless People, please
   t-shirts, you can get them


   nwf makes an out-of-order report from the Ministry of Truth: people born after 1989 are works of fiction
   we purple
   we gtfo