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Officer Reports:

Bubbles: Picnic-park-Frisbee-movie-mafia till 2am. Saturday was spent fucking around. Sunday was ITR. Did work somewhere in there?

Tim 1: Had a weekend got sorta sick but is getting better. Mbritton is in town and did a rocking band something. The other third of the band is the funk. Labor day which is nice was playing video games all weekend so it is nice that he got outside.

New people: Oden, Civ E, NJ, Thinks very slowly

Tim 2: Had a weekend. There was potluck and Frisbee, and a black hole of Satudray. Played halo or something. Sunday was ITR with 50 people. The silence deleted his memory of Saturday. Still having a weekend. Ignoring the communist tradition of doing nothing on labor day.

We have an event! Underground Tour Friday 7pm UC black chairs will lead around campus and tell you truths. There will be burgers if it is not raining at the end. Has nothing to do not grafitti on. Dress inconspicuously.

Margaret: Had a weekend. There was a potluck which was glorious. There was Doctor Who on Saturday. Sunday was ITR. SUBMIT TO PRAVDA.

Xander: Had a weekend. It was none of your damn business. Code for did absoulutely nothing.

Kelly: Had a saga. I got none of it down. But it was one hell of a saga.

(The KGB gets invaded by puppies.)

Marlena. Had a weekend. Overlapped with other exec reports. Intended to do work. Lol. There is weird black sludge coming out of a bathtub.

Old business:

Protracted expedition of Pittsburgh found a new number: 275

Ad hoc class outside committee: success


Committee to burn down r7 and the committee to not burn down r7 and the gratuitous obscenities committee and the committee for R&D of rule 34 (awkward to do this outside), spoken song lyrics committee much less awkward to do this inside: there is a party at r7 this weekend. Saturday at 9 PM

History: history repeats itself

Class outside committee reports failure

Oh god humidity: hurricane ivan. This is hurricane ivan

Counter point haws are awesome: parahawking is a thing. It is badfucking ass.

Ad hoc I am saying this for some reason: There is tropical storm kirk which will not live long and prosper

Ah White elephant allocates one minute for the future or now

Misappropriated Burn down r7 committee and the misappropriated not burn down r7 committee reports quantum success

Challenge coins are a thing in armed services. Members carry them around and must be presented or they must pay for drinks. There are now exec challenge coins. Matt Britton is a badass.

Story telling committee: story of the shamrock pimps. By Dan. Ask him for the story. Involves airports, wendy’s, record amounts of marijuana, being out of fries dubiously, bacon cheeseburgers, a multitude of hats, what is yall? The shamrock pimps, and fistbumping glass.

Misinformation: if you are interested in telling stories tat UT, there is a meeting at 6:30 (for upper classes)

AH broken record: Ah broken record….

We have the thing again! Its spirit has returned! Steven wants it! The war with Iran is not his fault.

New business!

Create the committee to Get ____ a partner for ______
To get people dates for events and partners for classes and clone ablank and set it up with things
The Dayton OH, committee approves
If we clone ablank, will he TA for himself?
If we clone abalnk will we have to clone josh?
Passes. $2 to broman Disbanded

Motion to create the Dick calculus committee
When people are deciding to say something, they can use this to assist with the decision
Change name to Richard calculus – friendly
Append to purpose math pickup lines – failed
Change name to Richard Nixon calculus – friendly
Overdue innuendo – length under the curve
Is there a law of conservation of dickishness?
This committee is derivative
This is now tricky dick calculus
This gives a new meaning to fuzzy math…
bswolf memorial committee approves
Maybe this will open relations with china?
How does this committee feel about hand-waving?
Passes. $7 to Margaret. She will chair

Motion to create the White elephant committee
Here have this incredibly inconvenient thing. But it s free!
Change name to Caucasian elephant – unfriendly.
This is another incident of the white man keeping me down
Change name to European American elephant – unfriendly.
Reckless pursuit – persuing someone is dangerous. Pursuing a motion is boring
Anything this committee gives to people will probably be sold at useless stuff
Thanks so much for these… things?
Oh crap I for got to bring something for this? Oh here is this stuff I got last year.
Change name to white owl committee. failed for confusion.
Passes - $4 to mbritton. exec will chair

Shark pun committee.
Shark puns !
Change name to spontaneous shark puns – friendly
This idea is fintastic
Soccer mom – if is stop moving ill die
You will mako me crazy
Activists of this committee are fishy
For the love of cod call the question
Passes. $14 to Stewart. Caroline will chair

Create the Touch the butt committee
This is NOT a finding Nemo reference
I’m sexy and I know it
I work out
Change purpose to hardcore roc climbing – friendly
There is a scene in finding Nemo where he touches a boat. It is not that.
Kick teki in the ass
I like big butts and I cannot lie
Passes. LOL BUTTS $21 to Margaret. She will chair.

Create the dramatic circle committee
Circles within circles! Wheels within wheels! And a giant brick rotunda where will have half a meeting!
Replace all instances of circles with octagons
Postpone until next meeting in the rotunda.

Allocation of $75 for the event – it’s a good idea

Allocation $55 for new Costco membership pending further discussion by exec. WE saved money by using this last year.

KGB superhero league
To assemble the best such as baguette warrior and the human banana
Nixon is already a KGB superhero
Thindercats ho – open for puns
Type A team
Different races of baguette warrior. Odd.
This is because he shares baguettes with everyone.
Ghooost puncher….
Seafood league: bring it! For the first time the guild of calamitous intent agrees
Time mafia no longer is extorting protection money from the cluster
Passes. $10 to mcginnis he and Oren will chair along wit everyone

RRA: WE have an event! Butts!

We have an event! UT! 7 at UC black chair for stories. Dress inconspicuously
Meeting at 6:30 today for stories

If you want t-shirts, we have them for sale

Pay your dues! $10/sem. $15 yr.

Exec is meeting at UC 318G Tuesday at 4:30

Shmucks: Party at r7

There are people who do not attend UT. There is something. Talk to twright.

NPP! There is a show this Saturday at 8PM 1 hr long. It will be fun! DH 1212

If you like rockets come to rocket club. Tuesday DH A200 4:30 PM somewhere.

Videogames for online games talk to afalk

Buggy. Talk to ethan about throwing girls down a hill

We are now in purple

There was a 3rd veep in charge of buggy. There were buggy t-shirts we could make more. Maybe.

Protractors in Pittsburgh will go to strip district this weekend. Talk to shank