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This is not a meeting. It's a KGB Fireside Chat.

Officer Reports

       Had a weekend
       They've been increasing in resemblance to weekends.
       Done! Has to grade tomorrow, but doesn't have to think to do that, just judge.
       If you put dead people by a fire, they burn.
       Had a four years.
       Approx. 23 minutes ago, submitted thesis!
       Now has to clean up her studio and turn in her keys
       New People:
           Owen Kahn. CS Major. From Portland, Maine. Has normal number of fingers and toes.
       Had a weekend.
       Began on thursday, when he took his final finals and turned 21.
       No event! It's Summer! Unofficial meetings will be on Mondays at 5:30.
       Had a weekend.
       Something about new bike fenders.
       Probably went climbing at some point.
       Went to chicagoland to hang out with her dad.
       Having a rad time, will be back tuesday.
       Had a weekend
       Weekend started at 11:30 on Friday, when 112 was over.
       After that wandered around aimlessly for like 20 minutes.
       And then goofed off all weekend.
       Had a weekend.
       Actually cared about finals?
       Had a weekend.
       Involved not studying, not quite finishing portal 2, and good food.

Committee Reports

   Daniel John Is So Full of Himself Committee:
       Ran fastest mile in months 8:40, lifted weights, came here.
   Alcoholist Committee:
       Pineapple is tasty
   Kirby & McGinnis Variety Hour:
       Has full attendance for the summer!
   Spoken Song lyrics Committee reprises it's first report:
       Jesse's girl.
       Something about sex.
       Y'all can look it up.
   Misappropriated Alchoholist Committee:
       Resisting urge to make cake squared
   Bequeathment Committee
       Committee for Inappropriate and Awkward Musical Accompanyment: Estelle
       Evil Seafood League: Xander
       Dramatic Speech Committee: bubbles -> tvaughan -> bubbles -> jack
       Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee: No one, it doesn't exist. 
       Thomas gives everything horrible, gross, and filibustery to Victor
       Rate committee: JRAM
       Penultimate Frisbee Committee: Dillon and Will
       dkirby's committees: Brian
       Chicken Dance Committee: Caroline
       Rhetorical Question Committee: Broman
   ad hoc Ping Pong Committee:
       pew, pew, PEW
   Chicken Dance Committee:
       Ackoodlydoo, ackoodlydoo!
   Thomas: Point of order is specifically asking the chair a question.
       AAAAAA is how I answered every multiple choice question.

Old Business

   The Thing! Stephen is not responsible for sticking a superball in the middle of the Thing during the summer

New Business

   Self Fulfilling Prophecy Committee: to create the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee and make tvaughan a chair
       purpose changed to "to create the Self Fulfilling Prophecy Committee" DONE
       title changed to "the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee" DONE
       Committee for Inappropriate and Awkward Musical Accompaniments reports
       PASSED. $5 to McGinnis. Disbanded.
   Make Mcginnis Pay 5 More Dollars Committee: to create the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee
       question called
       PASSED. $5 to McGinnis. Disbanded.
   Bizzarely Worded Signs committee: There's a sign in the room that says "push here, alarm will sound."
       "Slow Children"
       Inflammable means flammable, what is wrong with this country
       Imperadiction: imperitive statement and prediction
       "Beware of Dogz"
       "No right on red while crosswalk is occupied"
       "Beware of safety"
       "Left turn yield to thru traffic"
       "do not drink out of the urinals"
       sin: the derivative of -cos
           tvaughn: AUDGHAGH
           TVAUGHAN exits.
       PASSED. $2 to Thomas. Disbanded.
   Inappropriate and Awkward Jewsical Accompaniment Committee: To find the most inappopriate and awkward times to play and dance the Horah
       McGinnis does not make a holocaust joke
       append to purpose "have Adam just stand next to you and look at you" DONE
       "Crikey! Welcome to Israel!"
       PASSED. $2 to Bubbles. Xander chairs.


   Normal meetings will resume at 4:30 on the first monday of the semester!


   Guild of Calamitous intent is still recruiting and has more positions open due to the annexing of the evil seafood league
       Talk to Xander if you're interested in the lower regions of the alignment chart.
           Like the butt?
   Chris Hatfield is coming back from space! Hopefully he survived the landing.
   Thanks for a cool four years!

We are in purple.