Minutes20181203

EXEC

   Ian is not here. Liam is Ian. Liam had a weekend. did something on saturday. went to fucking r7 and shitposted about god and grades. it was awful. can't eat spicy food.

   Dez had a weekend. no one new. don't have to do the thing. started with event where pigeons happened. remembered that liked video games and spent too much time.

   Kate had a weekend. played pigeon boys. went over the one who's actually a pigeon. also couldn't eat spicy food. got locked out of game.
       Event: KGB Falls On Its Ass. ice skating in schenley park! Friday 6pm at Black Chairs. will walk over. if you can't make it when we leave, let kate know.
           <= $8 for rentals and skating. if you can't cover that cost, let kate know. we have spare money to cover you guys. 
           it's gonna be a fun time. come with us. hopefully won't fall on its ass.
       Next Event: get food on wednesday of finals week. Cheesecake Factory. RSVP if you wanna go. it's on Facebook, or cmukgb.org/eat

   Ellen had a weekend. eloped with a pigeon. study at local library.

   Janny had a weekend. also played pigeon and voiced a pigeon teacher. spent weekend trying to do laundry and some homework.
       Hash is 1

   Aren had a weekend. on top of video game night was arm day. went to the gym and only do arms. then carried so many things for vdo game night. also moved arms when playing video game.

   Mitch had a weekend. with the rest of committee, decided to date the actual pigeon over the anime boys.

COM REPORTS

   C: super trash brothers
       every appearance thus far, ice can kill you no matter what. am taking bet for an ice climbers infinite.

   C: stupid pr facts
       popery. interesting fun fact that we just found. 
       1. we have an event. Sentai with Senpai. Thursday 8pm. WEH 5320 assuming registrar is nice.
       2. Marvel Japan is the reason that pr has mechas. also co-created the 3rd, 4th, and 5th seasons of super sentai. we're on 42th
       3. magic sentai magiranger = wizards, family, magic
           ninja sentai hurricanger = got harry potter, name contracted from japanese version of hp and the philos stone.

   C: assasinate prez
       can't confirm he's not dead

   C: friends
       disposing waste in the forest. if you take your trash to the forest to get rid of it, you go uphill. they'll check downhill. nobody would drag it uphill. 

   C: bullshit internet drama
       tumblr officially banning porn.
       goran "shit!"
       bone witch. tumblr had a literal witch hunt from a callout post of some witch claims to steal body remains. went to her house. actual visits to house. she gave officers the human remains. 

   C: stupid history
       fidel castro ft. the cia
       prez of cuba for a while. cia didn't like that so tried to kill him. 638 attempts. included exploding cuban cigars. subcontract mafia. blow up. poison in milkshake (he had 1 milkshake per day). poison blew off in cold weather. destroy his beard, poison to make his beard to fall out, to destroy his popularity. his beard is very nice. 1.5 assassination attempts per month for 40 years. he died at home surrounded by his family.

   C: ad hoc rauen is the villain
       now have goal of subcontracting the mafia

   C: ww2 history is dumb 1/3
       porsche tiger?
       nazi wanted a new heavy tank. stupid design that was not used, but 100s of them already manufactured. now they had 100s of them lying around.

   C: comics are bullshit
       batman villain: the kgbeast
       cybernetically enhanced villains by the soviet in 1988. tried to assassinate ronald reagan. take down missiles with lasers and found out it's hard to do that. killed a bunch of people. failed to assassinate rr. locked up in a room to die but didn't. continue to fight batman for 30 years. even after the soviet ended. they lived on.

   C: kgb history
       1988 = year that cmu kgb was founded. and we still live on.
       p of info = fall of 87!
           but 88 was the first prez we know

   C: culinary standards
       condemn cheesecake factory

   C: super trash bros
       don't have switch. if you buy liam will try to play it.

OLD BUSINESS

   The thing (spirit)
       at = Liam
       goes to = Janny
           not fault = m to discretely ask dez to not ask for orders of the day
           fault = about to ask for orders of the day

>:(

   Orders of the day
       1. time capsule
           prepend: "new funky mode"
               antiseconded
           append: "rip tumblr porn"
               passed
               note that anything that is appended is before "if you like this consider tabling this for another 5 years"
           m: table until after winter break
               passed! 

NEW BUSINESS

   C: interesting fashion choices
   P: [picture on instagram]
       m: post this to tumblr as porn
           nah
       passed.
       $1 to Liam. chair=anyone who has a country on their chest in any way, shape, or form.

   C: unfortunate singular noun
   P: kgb falls on its ass implies that kgb has a singular ass. goal = who that ass is
       m: propose Dez as ass of the kgb
           dilatory
       m: propose whoever 1vp is as the ass of the kgb
           we're in a committee, but we can create the com and create a special motion. 
           1. can decide the ass why who is fallen on the most this friday.
               dilatory
               oh god don't fall on your ass
           2. whoever is the current chair of the meeting, who dictates what we can create in the meeting, is the ass.
               you failed to make "Dez is a fascist joke"
       $1 to Liam. chair=the nuts of the kgb

   C: to overthrow the tyrant
   P: down with dez. down with dez. down with dez. down with dez. down with dez. 
       m: replace "down with dez." with "dez for prez"
           antiseconded
       m: replace "down with dez." with "anyone but dezident for anything but president"
           very friendly and seconded.
           it's a good idea!
           been changed.
           new P: anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president.
           
       nicene conference c: appoint kushal as the bishop
       our ruler is measured in janny length, which is the length of a janny.
           the chair (dez) is 1.1 janny lengths
           
       m: replace with "anything that is president"
           friendly. 
       m: fight that
           passed. same purpose
           
       Summary:
       C: to overthrow the tyrant
       P: anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president. anyone but dezident for anything but president.
       
       $1 to Henry. chair=myself and anyone who values freedom. whatever the cia defines as freedom.

   Standing rule: "m to fight that" is always in order
       history: "fight me" = alskdjfhalksdjhf
           has sat down
       m: define "m to fight that" = undo the previous motion iff it (the previous motion) was confirmed by the person who made the com rather than voted on
           passed!
           so, "m to fight that" allows you to fight the friendliness of the previous motion
       henry "this is how democracy die"
           m: murder democracy
               that's been done
       passed!

       we have reached our hash limit.

   report from C: to confuse the prez 
       we now have 2 standing rules ian doesn't know about

   C: markov chain and wellness
   P: markov on the part you hate.
       ken hovis. combine everyone's rants.
       "please do not make future generations of mcs students waste their time like i wasted mine" fish fish fish
       henry = watched "the inconvenience truth" and wrote about algore
       cory's works cited for engage essay
           1. king james bible
           2. talk called the mindful brain
           3. cited ken hovis because the sentence is his intellectual property
       $2 to rauen

   M: alloc <=$50 to cover people's admission to this event.
       it's a good idea

   M: salute dr. ken hovis, phd
       p of info: mr. dr. prof. ken hovis

   C: tumblr porn memorial
   P: print out several hundred pages of tumblr porn and nail it to ben shapiro
       woody memorial com: we cannot prove that woody is not, in fact, dead
       two years ago, one floor on stever printed memes of their ra and posted it all over campus. it was multiple people's total printer quotas. all in color. multiple people messaged them to take it down.
       passed. 
       $1 to Matt. chair=ben shapiro?

REAL ANNOUNCE

   hi yeah we have an event! 
       This Friday: kgb falls on its ass. black chairs 6pm friday. if you can't afford the $8 fee, tell kate. 
       Next Wednesday: Geek Eat! 5pm reservation rn. meeting at 4pm to head out. please rsvp & bring your id so you can take the bus!
           vote at the link on facebook or cmukgb.org/eat

   aren found out that there's some issue with the spreadsheet. aren's freezing spreadsheet until it's fixed. don't pay aren until then.

   there is a meeting next week. short one. we don't have this room but will let you know what room will be available. 

SCHMUCKS

   stupid pr facts! sentai with senpai! thursday dec 13, probably at 8 or 8.30. some watch ss! WEH 5320, assuming the registrar plays nice. if something else happens, will let you know.

   cmu kgb war criminals: will run big game of civiliation 5 over winter break. tell henry if interested.

   info: this room is free and doesn't have an exam next week. has 4.30 exam

   super trash bros: let liam know if you have game.