https://wiki.cmukgb.org/api.php?action=feedcontributions&user=Sonia&feedformat=atomKGB Wiki - User contributions [en]2024-03-28T14:36:53ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.28.2https://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20170130&diff=8316Minutes201701302017-03-02T23:31:33Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
Touching tools<br />
DYLAN<br />
Can you fit three people and a shit ton of stuff in a Prius? (yes)<br />
MURPHY<br />
very sleep deprived<br />
RIN<br />
made <br />
HARRY<br />
Raaaave<br />
JOE<br />
got injured at a kgb meeting<br />
NIKA<br />
small people for small houses<br />
COMMITTEE REPORT<br />
Come to builds<br />
Skye got killed<br />
motion to create the broken record committee<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
NONE(we did it reddit)<br />
SPECIAL BUSINESS<br />
We'll miss you Nika <3<br />
We need a new S@A<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Friends in High Places committee<br />
I'm not doing anything unusual I'm just very tall<br />
it passed<br />
Sold to Asher $4<br />
disbanded<br />
Can you give a horse amphetamines committee<br />
yes<br />
(please don't)<br />
it failed<br />
motion to create the broken record committee<br />
beating a dead horse<br />
motion to postpone til next week<br />
that passed<br />
motion to rebrand the KGB?<br />
organ donor appreciation committee<br />
they really put their heart into it<br />
it passed<br />
sold to henry $2<br />
chaired by ???<br />
motion to #define motion to create the broken record committee to create the out of order committee<br />
it failed<br />
don't owo committee<br />
$350 fine<br />
it passed<br />
sold to Frosty $8<br />
chaired by KGB furries committee<br />
committee to wake hamilton up<br />
can't wake hamilton up, can't wake hamilton up inside<br />
it passed?<br />
sold to Maxwell $6<br />
chaired by Asher<br />
abstention committee<br />
to see if this passes by abstention<br />
motion to postpone indefinitely<br />
it passed<br />
standing rule that a motion to awoo is always in order<br />
it passed<br />
/fanfiction<br />
best composer of the 23rd century committee<br />
yohan sebastian spock<br />
passed<br />
sold to sonia $2<br />
Joran Dax<br />
pink floyd gameshow committee<br />
so, so you think you can dance<br />
it failed<br />
anti-negative numbers<br />
I will stop at nothing to avoid them<br />
motion to postpone indefinitely<br />
postponed<br />
don't remember that n+1th committee<br />
motion to table<br />
motion to table indefinitely<br />
that passed<br />
standing rule that from now on to create a standing rule you must remove two existing standing rules<br />
absolutely fucking not<br />
allocation $50 for event<br />
cool beans<br />
committee to exclaim on whether something is kind<br />
niccccce<br />
it passed<br />
sold to Asher $11<br />
anyone who's willing to use the word nice six or seven times a sentence<br />
REAL RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENT<br />
UPA<br />
Friday 7pm breed hall<br />
bring money<br />
sell your time<br />
come to exec<br />
apply for S@A<br />
pay your dues<br />
SHMUCKS<br />
help asher with his thing<br />
/fanfiction<br />
/fanfiction</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20170123&diff=8315Minutes201701232017-03-02T23:27:34Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
Potluck Molassacre<br />
Skye had a shouting match<br />
DYLAN<br />
ahh i missed it<br />
MURPHY<br />
rythmics and 1200 calories of cool ranch doritos<br />
RIN<br />
20% of the time it works 20% of the time<br />
HARRY<br />
bostooooon<br />
JOE<br />
rip chromebook<br />
NIKA<br />
Birds, A library of Bowel, It was sad<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
Curiosity killed the cat furry committee hijacked by sonia<br />
Build poll on the facebook page<br />
*NOITCES YOUR HEARING AID* OWO WHAT'S THIS?<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The out of order committee<br />
wat<br />
it passed<br />
Sold to Owen $16<br />
Delete This<br />
I dread everything and understand hash tables<br />
What are these computing jokes I don't git them? <br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Tim $9<br />
Chaired by anyone who has majored in anything or understands hash tables<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Political Junkies Anonymous<br />
Don't watch congressional hearings<br />
it passed<br />
Sold to Henry $7<br />
Chaired by Henry and Nate Silver<br />
Broken Record Committee<br />
Motion to create the Broken Record Committee<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Asher $7<br />
Chaired by the motion to create the broken record committee<br />
WPXI Extreme Dab Report Committee<br />
brrrbrrbrrbrbbrr to report dabs<br />
motion to create the broken record committee<br />
it passed<br />
Sold to Cliff $3<br />
Disbanded<br />
Consumer Rights Committee<br />
Arresting people who make vore jokes<br />
People who eat people are the happiest people<br />
(it's a kink thing)<br />
It failed<br />
Lumberjack computer committee<br />
Give them more opportunities to log in<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Frieder $4<br />
Chaired by all the children in this room<br />
Committee to keep Asher from learning math and financial literacy<br />
Profit?<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Owen $14<br />
disbanded<br />
Epistemic Committee<br />
How would we know<br />
it passed<br />
sold to rin $2<br />
disbanded<br />
Motion to ban the string "The entire script of the bee movie"<br />
Motion to postpone til the first meeting after the annual meeting<br />
it passed<br />
Enterprise gets attacked by a cloud of space ice<br />
Sir we're being hailed<br />
set phasers to pun<br />
it failed<br />
Allocation of $100 for this week's event<br />
it passed<br />
Maine Nationalism committee<br />
most definitely prove nothing exists north of boston<br />
Sold to henry $3<br />
Allocation of $500 for booth<br />
it passed<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
Tool Training!<br />
Kage Friday 7PM<br />
come to exec<br />
CTFWS is February 24th<br />
SHMUCKS<br />
Trivia!!!<br />
KGBB<br />
GTFO</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Sonia&diff=8190Sonia2017-01-12T20:16:14Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Sonia Berg''' is the current champion of the KGB Pit Fighting League, the Tzar of Hats, and the owner of the [[Sonia Memorial Committee]]. <br />
<br />
[[Category:Members]][[Category:Current Members]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Sonia_Memorial_Committee&diff=8189Sonia Memorial Committee2017-01-12T20:15:09Z<p>Sonia: Created page with "The spiritual successor to the Bswolf Memorial Committee, the Sonia Memorial Committee's stated purpose is the punchline to the joke "Q: Why didn't the sesame seed want to..."</p>
<hr />
<div>The spiritual successor to the [[Bswolf Memorial Committee]], the Sonia Memorial Committee's stated purpose is the punchline to the joke "Q: Why didn't the sesame seed want to leave the casino? A: It was on a roll!"<br />
<br />
The owner of the committee is [[Sonia]], who makes weekly reports in the form of choice jokes selected with the utmost care.<br />
<br />
Fun fact: Sonia is currently barred from being the chair of this committee, as it is expressly chaired by "Anyone who doesn't make German puns, those are the wurst."<br />
<br />
[[Category:Committees]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Sonia_memorial_committee&diff=8188Sonia memorial committee2017-01-12T20:08:06Z<p>Sonia: Redirected page to Sonia Memorial Committee</p>
<hr />
<div>#REDIRECT [[Sonia_Memorial_Committee]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20161108&diff=8152MinutesExec201611082016-12-08T01:04:15Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
It was a day<br />
DYLAN<br />
Forgot about the meeting until very recently<br />
MURPHY<br />
No sleep til brooklyn<br />
RIN<br />
Voted and slept<br />
HARRY<br />
no<br />
JOE<br />
i am a thief<br />
NIKA<br />
Did their civic duty super fast<br />
AGENDA<br />
Monday's Meeting<br />
It was fine<br />
Improv <br />
It was great<br />
We didn't know what we were doing<br />
That was fine<br />
Let's do it again<br />
Asher should run it<br />
CTFWS<br />
everything is fine<br />
posters happened<br />
Texting system<br />
talk to dillon<br />
Harry do the blue things tonight<br />
Rules presentation is going fine<br />
PDF of presentation pls<br />
We have 11 judges<br />
Alumni will judge<br />
Making stuff is happening tomorrow<br />
joe, dylan, murphy, recruit freshmen<br />
Count the old stuff<br />
count stuff after meeting<br />
Name the white stuff<br />
White Wand of Wandiness<br />
Joseph's Technicolor Dream Belt<br />
Prismatic Potion of Polychomatism<br />
Supplies<br />
We gotta print judges booklets and cheat sheets<br />
Rin is doing booklets<br />
Joe is doing cheat sheets<br />
walkthrough at 5:30 need judges<br />
presenters be there at 5:00<br />
exec go to office at 5 if not presenting<br />
rin call ems<br />
rin email everyone and make sure they're on time<br />
(everyone is talking at once ahhhhh)<br />
Post to facebook groups<br />
Fence<br />
Try to take it tomorrow<br />
post spreadsheet<br />
talk to the frat<br />
GBGC<br />
We're fine<br />
Money for posters yay<br />
Annual Meeting<br />
April 24th<br />
End Meeting<br />
<br />
[[Category:Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Mmercado&diff=8151Mmercado2016-12-08T01:03:23Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Marí Mercado'''<br />
<br />
[[Category: Members]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Jnemes&diff=8150Jnemes2016-12-08T01:02:48Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Jeffrey Nemes''' makes a lot of weird [[Jeff Sounds|noises]]. He also likes sea shanties.<br />
<br />
[[Category:Members]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=The_Bee_Movie&diff=8065The Bee Movie2016-09-27T08:18:09Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div> <br />
According to all known laws<br />
of aviation,<br />
<br />
<br />
there is no way a bee<br />
should be able to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Its wings are too small to get<br />
its fat little body off the ground.<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee, of course, flies anyway<br />
<br />
<br />
because bees don't care<br />
what humans think is impossible.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooh, black and yellow!<br />
Let's shake it up a little.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry! Breakfast is ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Coming!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hang on a second.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry?<br />
- Adam?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Can you believe this is happening?<br />
- I can't. I'll pick you up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Looking sharp.<br />
<br />
<br />
Use the stairs. Your father<br />
paid good money for those.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry. I'm excited.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's the graduate.<br />
We're very proud of you, son.<br />
<br />
<br />
A perfect report card, all B's.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ma! I got a thing going here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got lint on your fuzz.<br />
- Ow! That's me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.<br />
- Bye!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I told you,<br />
stop flying in the house!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Adam.<br />
- Hey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that fuzz gel?<br />
- A little. Special day, graduation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Never thought I'd make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days grade school,<br />
three days high school.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those were awkward.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days college. I'm glad I took<br />
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did come back different.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, Barry.<br />
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hear about Frankie?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You going to the funeral?<br />
- No, I'm not going.<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody knows,<br />
sting someone, you die.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't waste it on a squirrel.<br />
Such a hothead.<br />
<br />
<br />
I guess he could have<br />
just gotten out of the way.<br />
<br />
<br />
I love this incorporating<br />
an amusement park into our day.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why we don't need vacations.<br />
<br />
<br />
Boy, quite a bit of pomp...<br />
under the circumstances.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, Adam, today we are men.<br />
- We are!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee-men.<br />
- Amen!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hallelujah!<br />
<br />
<br />
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,<br />
<br />
<br />
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome, New Hive City<br />
graduating class of...<br />
<br />
<br />
...9:15.<br />
<br />
<br />
That concludes our ceremonies.<br />
<br />
<br />
And begins your career<br />
at Honex Industries!<br />
<br />
<br />
Will we pick our job today?<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard it's just orientation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Heads up! Here we go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Keep your hands and antennas<br />
inside the tram at all times.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wonder what it'll be like?<br />
- A little scary.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome to Honex,<br />
a division of Honesco<br />
<br />
<br />
and a part of the Hexagon Group.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
We know that you, as a bee,<br />
have worked your whole life<br />
<br />
<br />
to get to the point where you<br />
can work for your whole life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen<br />
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our top-secret formula<br />
<br />
<br />
is automatically color-corrected,<br />
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured<br />
<br />
<br />
into this soothing sweet syrup<br />
<br />
<br />
with its distinctive<br />
golden glow you know as...<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That girl was hot.<br />
- She's my cousin!<br />
<br />
<br />
- She is?<br />
- Yes, we're all cousins.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Right. You're right.<br />
- At Honex, we constantly strive<br />
<br />
<br />
to improve every aspect<br />
of bee existence.<br />
<br />
<br />
These bees are stress-testing<br />
a new helmet technology.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What do you think he makes?<br />
- Not enough.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here we have our latest advancement,<br />
the Krelman.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What does that do?<br />
- Catches that little strand of honey<br />
<br />
<br />
that hangs after you pour it.<br />
Saves us millions.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can anyone work on the Krelman?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. Most bee jobs are<br />
small ones. But bees know<br />
<br />
<br />
that every small job,<br />
if it's done well, means a lot.<br />
<br />
<br />
But choose carefully<br />
<br />
<br />
because you'll stay in the job<br />
you pick for the rest of your life.<br />
<br />
<br />
The same job the rest of your life?<br />
I didn't know that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's the difference?<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll be happy to know that bees,<br />
as a species, haven't had one day off<br />
<br />
<br />
in 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you'll just work us to death?<br />
<br />
<br />
We'll sure try.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! That blew my mind!<br />
<br />
<br />
"What's the difference?"<br />
How can you say that?<br />
<br />
<br />
One job forever?<br />
That's an insane choice to have to make.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm relieved. Now we only have<br />
to make one decision in life.<br />
<br />
<br />
But, Adam, how could they<br />
never have told us that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would you question anything?<br />
We're bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the most perfectly<br />
functioning society on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
You ever think maybe things<br />
work a little too well here?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like what? Give me one example.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. But you know<br />
what I'm talking about.<br />
<br />
<br />
Please clear the gate.<br />
Royal Nectar Force on approach.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a second. Check it out.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!<br />
- Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've never seen them this close.<br />
<br />
<br />
They know what it's like<br />
outside the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, but some don't come back.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Jocks!<br />
- Hi, Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
You guys did great!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're monsters!<br />
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I wonder where they were.<br />
- I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their day's not planned.<br />
<br />
<br />
Outside the hive, flying who knows<br />
where, doing who knows what.<br />
<br />
<br />
You can't just decide to be a Pollen<br />
Jock. You have to be bred for that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look. That's more pollen<br />
than you and I will see in a lifetime.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just a status symbol.<br />
Bees make too much of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it<br />
and the ladies see you wearing it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those ladies?<br />
Aren't they our cousins too?<br />
<br />
<br />
Distant. Distant.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at these two.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Couple of Hive Harrys.<br />
- Let's have fun with them.<br />
<br />
<br />
It must be dangerous<br />
being a Pollen Jock.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me<br />
against a mushroom!<br />
<br />
<br />
He had a paw on my throat,<br />
and with the other, he was slapping me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, my!<br />
- I never thought I'd knock him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were you doing during this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Trying to alert the authorities.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can autograph that.<br />
<br />
<br />
A little gusty out there today,<br />
wasn't it, comrades?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Gusty.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're hitting a sunflower patch<br />
six miles from here tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Six miles, huh?<br />
- Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
A puddle jump for us,<br />
but maybe you're not up for it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Maybe I am.<br />
- You are not!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.<br />
<br />
<br />
What do you think, buzzy-boy?<br />
Are you bee enough?<br />
<br />
<br />
I might be. It all depends<br />
on what 0900 means.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Honex!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, you surprised me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You decide what you're interested in?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, there's a lot of choices.<br />
- But you only get one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you ever get bored<br />
doing the same job every day?<br />
<br />
<br />
Son, let me tell you about stirring.<br />
<br />
<br />
You grab that stick, and you just<br />
move it around, and you stir it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You get yourself into a rhythm.<br />
It's a beautiful thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, Dad,<br />
the more I think about it,<br />
<br />
<br />
maybe the honey field<br />
just isn't right for me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You were thinking of what,<br />
making balloon animals?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a bad job<br />
for a guy with a stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Janet, your son's not sure<br />
he wants to go into honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.<br />
- I'm not trying to be funny.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're not funny! You're going<br />
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're gonna be a stirrer?<br />
- No one's listening to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait till you see the sticks I have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could say anything right now.<br />
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's open some honey and celebrate!<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.<br />
Shave my antennae.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shack up with a grasshopper. Get<br />
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're starting work today!<br />
- Today's the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
Come on! All the good jobs<br />
will be gone.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,<br />
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is it still available?<br />
- Hang on. Two left!<br />
<br />
<br />
One of them's yours! Congratulations!<br />
Step to the side.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you get?<br />
- Picking crud out. Stellar!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Couple of newbies?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make your choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You want to go first?<br />
- No, you go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my. What's available?<br />
<br />
<br />
Restroom attendant's open,<br />
not for the reason you think.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Any chance of getting the Krelman?<br />
- Sure, you're on.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wax monkey's always open.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Krelman opened up again.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee died. Makes an opening. See?<br />
He's dead. Another dead one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dead from the neck up.<br />
Dead from the neck down. That's life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, this is so hard!<br />
<br />
<br />
Heating, cooling,<br />
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,<br />
<br />
<br />
humming, inspector number seven,<br />
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,<br />
<br />
<br />
mite wrangler. Barry, what<br />
do you think I should... Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, we've got the sunflower patch<br />
in quadrant nine...<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened to you?<br />
Where are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm going out.<br />
- Out? Out where?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Out there.<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have to, before I go<br />
to work for the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Another call coming in.<br />
<br />
<br />
If anyone's feeling brave,<br />
there's a Korean deli on 83rd<br />
<br />
<br />
that gets their roses today.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, guys.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Look at that.<br />
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Really? Feeling lucky, are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sign here, here. Just initial that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got a rain advisory today,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as you all know,<br />
bees cannot fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
So be careful. As always,<br />
watch your brooms,<br />
<br />
<br />
hockey sticks, dogs,<br />
birds, bears and bats.<br />
<br />
<br />
Also, I got a couple of reports<br />
of root beer being poured on us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Murphy's in a home because of it,<br />
babbling like a cicada!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's awful.<br />
- And a reminder for you rookies,<br />
<br />
<br />
bee law number one,<br />
absolutely no talking to humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, launch positions!<br />
<br />
<br />
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,<br />
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!<br />
<br />
<br />
Black and yellow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
You ready for this, hot shot?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wind, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Antennae, check.<br />
- Nectar pack, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wings, check.<br />
- Stinger, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
Scared out of my shorts, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, ladies,<br />
<br />
<br />
let's move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pound those petunias,<br />
you striped stem-suckers!<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, drain those flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
So blue.<br />
<br />
<br />
I feel so fast and free!<br />
<br />
<br />
Box kite!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Blue Leader.<br />
We have roses visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand to the side, kid.<br />
It's got a bit of a kick.<br />
<br />
<br />
That is one nectar collector!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ever see pollination up close?<br />
- No, sir.<br />
<br />
<br />
I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it<br />
over here. Maybe a dash over there,<br />
<br />
<br />
a pinch on that one.<br />
See that? It's a little bit of magic.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's amazing. Why do we do that?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's pollen power. More pollen, more<br />
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Cool.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.<br />
Could be daisies. Don't we need those?<br />
<br />
<br />
Copy that visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait. One of these flowers<br />
seems to be on the move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Say again? You're reporting<br />
a moving flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was on the line!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is the coolest. What is it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know, but I'm loving this color.<br />
<br />
<br />
It smells good.<br />
Not like a flower, but I like it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, fuzzy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Chemical-y.<br />
<br />
<br />
Careful, guys. It's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweet lord of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Candy-brain, get off there!<br />
<br />
<br />
Problem!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Guys!<br />
- This could be bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very close.<br />
<br />
<br />
Gonna hurt.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mama's little boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
You are way out of position, rookie!<br />
<br />
<br />
Coming in at you like a missile!<br />
<br />
<br />
Help me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't think these are flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Should we tell him?<br />
- I think he knows.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Match point!<br />
<br />
<br />
You can start packing up, honey,<br />
because you're about to eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yowser!<br />
<br />
<br />
Gross.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a bee in the car!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do something!<br />
- I'm driving!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, bee.<br />
- He's back here!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's going to sting me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody move. If you don't move,<br />
he won't sting you. Freeze!<br />
<br />
<br />
He blinked!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spray him, Granny!<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow... the tension level<br />
out here is unbelievable.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get home.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Check out my new resume.<br />
I made it into a fold-out brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? Folds out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this time. This time. This time.<br />
This time! This time! This...<br />
<br />
<br />
Drapes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That is diabolical.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's fantastic. It's got all my special<br />
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's number one? Star Wars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah, I don't go for that...<br />
<br />
<br />
...kind of stuff.<br />
<br />
<br />
No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.<br />
They're out of their minds.<br />
<br />
<br />
When I leave a job interview, they're<br />
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't remember the sun<br />
having a big 75 on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I predicted global warming.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could feel it getting hotter.<br />
At first I thought it was just me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait! Stop! Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand back. These are winter boots.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't kill him!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know I'm allergic to them!<br />
This thing could kill me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have<br />
less value than yours?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have any less value<br />
than mine? Is that your statement?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just saying all life has value. You<br />
don't know what he's capable of feeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
My brochure!<br />
<br />
<br />
There you go, little guy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not scared of him.<br />
It's an allergic thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Put that on your resume brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My whole face could puff up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Make it one of your special skills.<br />
<br />
<br />
Knocking someone out<br />
is also a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?<br />
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You could put carob chips on there.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Supposed to be less calories.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life.<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, here it goes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah.<br />
<br />
<br />
What would I say?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could really get in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee law.<br />
You're not supposed to talk to a human.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm doing this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got to.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I can't do it. Come on!<br />
<br />
<br />
No. Yes. No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do it. I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
How should I start it?<br />
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here she comes! Speak, you fool!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hi!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're talking.<br />
- Yes, I know.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, it's OK. It's fine.<br />
I know I'm dreaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I don't recall going to bed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I'm sure this<br />
is very disconcerting.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is a bit of a surprise to me.<br />
I mean, you're a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
I am. And I'm not supposed<br />
to be doing this,<br />
<br />
<br />
but they were all trying to kill me.<br />
<br />
<br />
And if it wasn't for you...<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to thank you.<br />
It's just how I was raised.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was a little weird.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm talking with a bee.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm talking to a bee.<br />
And the bee is talking to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I just want to say I'm grateful.<br />
I'll leave now.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait! How did you learn to do that?<br />
- What?<br />
<br />
<br />
The talking thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Same way you did, I guess.<br />
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's very funny.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,<br />
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
Can I...<br />
<br />
<br />
...get you something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. I mean...<br />
I don't know. Coffee?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to put you out.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's just coffee.<br />
- I hate to impose.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Don't be ridiculous!<br />
- Actually, I would love a cup.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, you want rum cake?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I shouldn't.<br />
- Have some.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No, I can't.<br />
- Come on!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where?<br />
- These stripes don't help.<br />
<br />
<br />
You look great!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know if you know<br />
anything about fashion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you all right?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's making the tie in the cab<br />
as they're flying up Madison.<br />
<br />
<br />
He finally gets there.<br />
<br />
<br />
He runs up the steps into the church.<br />
The wedding is on.<br />
<br />
<br />
And he says, "Watermelon?<br />
I thought you said Guatemalan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would I marry a watermelon?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is that a bee joke?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the kind of stuff we do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, different.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, what are you gonna do, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
About work? I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do my part for the hive,<br />
but I can't do it the way they want.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how you feel.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You do?<br />
- Sure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or<br />
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Really?<br />
- My only interest is flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our new queen was just elected<br />
with that same campaign slogan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, if you look...<br />
<br />
<br />
There's my hive right there. See it?<br />
<br />
<br />
You're in Sheep Meadow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!<br />
<br />
<br />
No way! I know that area.<br />
I lost a toe ring there once.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why do girls put rings on their toes?<br />
- Why not?<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's like putting a hat on your knee.<br />
- Maybe I'll try that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You all right, ma'am?<br />
- Oh, yeah. Fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just having two cups of coffee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, this has been great.<br />
Thanks for the coffee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it's no trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,<br />
I'd be up the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you...?<br />
<br />
<br />
Can I take a piece of this with me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sure! Here, have a crumb.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thanks!<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Well, then...<br />
I guess I'll see you around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or not.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
And thank you<br />
so much again... for before.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that? That was nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
This can't possibly work.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's all set to go.<br />
We may as well try it.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Dave, pull the chute.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Sounds amazing.<br />
- It was amazing!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was the scariest,<br />
happiest moment of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Humans! I can't believe<br />
you were with humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
Giant, scary humans!<br />
What were they like?<br />
<br />
<br />
Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
They eat crazy giant things.<br />
They drive crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?<br />
- Some of them. But some of them don't.<br />
<br />
<br />
- How'd you get back?<br />
- Poodle.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw<br />
whatever you wanted to see.<br />
<br />
<br />
You had your "experience." Now you<br />
can pick out yourjob and be normal.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well...<br />
- Well?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I met someone.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did? Was she Bee-ish?<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!<br />
- No, no, no, not a wasp.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Spider?<br />
- I'm not attracted to spiders.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's the hottest thing,<br />
with the eight legs and all.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't get by that face.<br />
<br />
<br />
So who is she?<br />
<br />
<br />
She's... human.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, no. That's a bee law.<br />
You wouldn't break a bee law.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Her name's Vanessa.<br />
- Oh, boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
She's so nice. And she's a florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're not dating.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're flying outside the hive, talking<br />
to humans that attack our homes<br />
<br />
<br />
with power washers and M-80s!<br />
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life!<br />
And she understands me.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is over!<br />
<br />
<br />
Eat this.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is not over! What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
- They call it a crumb.<br />
- It was so stingin' stripey!<br />
<br />
<br />
And that's not what they eat.<br />
That's what falls off what they eat!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You know what a Cinnabon is?<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.<br />
They heat it up...<br />
<br />
<br />
Sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
...really hot!<br />
- Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
We are not them! We're us.<br />
There's us and there's them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, but who can deny<br />
the heart that is yearning?<br />
<br />
<br />
There's no yearning.<br />
Stop yearning. Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got to start thinking bee,<br />
my friend. Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
There he is. He's in the pool.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know what your problem is, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta start thinking bee?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will this go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's been three days!<br />
Why aren't you working?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got a lot of big life decisions<br />
to think about.<br />
<br />
<br />
What life? You have no life!<br />
You have no job. You're barely a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Would it kill you<br />
to make a little honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, come out.<br />
Your father's talking to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Martin, would you talk to him?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm talking to you!<br />
<br />
<br />
You coming?<br />
<br />
<br />
Got everything?<br />
<br />
<br />
All set!<br />
<br />
<br />
Go ahead. I'll catch up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't be too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're still here.<br />
- I told you not to yell at him.<br />
<br />
<br />
He doesn't respond to yelling!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Then why yell at me?<br />
- Because you don't listen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not listening to this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, I've gotta go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where are you going?<br />
- I'm meeting a friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
A girl? Is this why you can't decide?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I just hope she's Bee-ish.<br />
<br />
<br />
They have a huge parade<br />
of flowers every year in Pasadena?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be in the Tournament of Roses,<br />
that's every florist's dream!<br />
<br />
<br />
Up on a float, surrounded<br />
by flowers, crowds cheering.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tournament. Do the roses<br />
compete in athletic events?<br />
<br />
<br />
No. All right, I've got one.<br />
How come you don't fly everywhere?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's exhausting. Why don't you<br />
run everywhere? It's faster.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, OK, I see, I see.<br />
All right, your turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?<br />
That's insane!<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have that?<br />
<br />
<br />
We have Hivo, but it's a disease.<br />
It's a horrible, horrible disease.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dumb bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You must want to sting all those jerks.<br />
<br />
<br />
We try not to sting.<br />
It's usually fatal for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you have to watch your temper.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very carefully.<br />
You kick a wall, take a walk,<br />
<br />
<br />
write an angry letter and throw it out.<br />
Work through it like any emotion:<br />
<br />
<br />
Anger, jealousy, lust.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is wrong with you?!<br />
- It's a bug.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's not bothering anybody.<br />
Get out of here, you creep!<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it was. How did you know?<br />
<br />
<br />
It felt like about 10 pages.<br />
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've really got that<br />
down to a science.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.<br />
- I'll bet.<br />
<br />
<br />
What in the name<br />
of Mighty Hercules is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
How did this get here?<br />
Cute Bee, Golden Blossom,<br />
<br />
<br />
Ray Liotta Private Select?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is he that actor?<br />
- I never heard of him.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why is this here?<br />
- For people. We eat it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have<br />
enough food of your own?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, yes.<br />
- How do you get it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees make it.<br />
- I know who makes it!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's hard to make it!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's heating, cooling, stirring.<br />
You need a whole Krelman thing!<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's organic.<br />
- It's our-ganic!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just honey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just what?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't know about this!<br />
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!<br />
<br />
<br />
You've taken our homes, schools,<br />
hospitals! This is all we have!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's on sale?!<br />
I'm getting to the bottom of this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm getting to the bottom<br />
of all of this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Hector.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You almost done?<br />
- Almost.<br />
<br />
<br />
He is here. I sense it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I guess I'll go home now<br />
<br />
<br />
and just leave this nice honey out,<br />
with no one around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're busted, box boy!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I heard something.<br />
So you can talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can talk.<br />
And now you'll start talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where you getting the sweet stuff?<br />
Who's your supplier?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand.<br />
I thought we were friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
The last thing we want<br />
to do is upset bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're too late! It's ours now!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, have crossed<br />
the wrong sword!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, will be lunch<br />
for my iguana, Ignacio!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the honey coming from?<br />
<br />
<br />
Tell me where!<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!<br />
<br />
<br />
Crazy person!<br />
<br />
<br />
What horrible thing has happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
These faces, they never knew<br />
what hit them. And now<br />
<br />
<br />
they're on the road to nowhere!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just keep still.<br />
<br />
<br />
What? You're not dead?<br />
<br />
<br />
Do I look dead? They will wipe anything<br />
that moves. Where you headed?<br />
<br />
<br />
To Honey Farms.<br />
I am onto something huge here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,<br />
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Tacoma.<br />
<br />
<br />
- And you?<br />
- He really is dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Uh-oh!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is that?!<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wiper! Triple blade!<br />
- Triple blade?<br />
<br />
<br />
Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does everything have<br />
to be so doggone clean?!<br />
<br />
<br />
How much do you people need to see?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Open your eyes!<br />
Stick your head out the window!<br />
<br />
<br />
From NPR News in Washington,<br />
I'm Carl Kasell.<br />
<br />
<br />
But don't kill no more bugs!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee!<br />
- Moose blood guy!!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You hear something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like tiny screaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn off the radio.<br />
<br />
<br />
Whassup, bee boy?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Blood.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a row of honey jars,<br />
as far as the eye could see.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
I assume wherever this truck goes<br />
is where they're getting it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I mean, that honey's ours.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees hang tight.<br />
- We're all jammed in.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a close community.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not us, man. We on our own.<br />
Every mosquito on his own.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if you get in trouble?<br />
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody likes us. They just smack.<br />
See a mosquito, smack, smack!<br />
<br />
<br />
At least you're out in the world.<br />
You must meet girls.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girls try to trade up,<br />
get with a moth, dragonfly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got to be kidding me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mooseblood's about to leave<br />
the building! So long, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, guys!<br />
- Mooseblood!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I'd catch y'all down here.<br />
Did you bring your crazy straw?<br />
<br />
<br />
We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,<br />
and it's pretty much pure profit.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this place?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee's got a brain<br />
the size of a pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
They are pinheads!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Check out the new smoker.<br />
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Thomas 3000!<br />
<br />
<br />
Smoker?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.<br />
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.<br />
<br />
<br />
A couple breaths of this<br />
knocks them right out.<br />
<br />
<br />
They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money.<br />
<br />
<br />
"They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my!<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. It doesn't last too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you know you're<br />
in a fake hive with fake walls?<br />
<br />
<br />
Our queen was moved here.<br />
We had no choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is your queen?<br />
That's a man in women's clothes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a drag queen!<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's hundreds of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our honey is being brazenly stolen<br />
on a massive scale!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is worse than anything bears<br />
have done! I intend to do something.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry, stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Who told you humans are taking<br />
our honey? That's a rumor.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do these look like rumors?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a conspiracy theory.<br />
These are obviously doctored photos.<br />
<br />
<br />
How did you get mixed up in this?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's been talking to humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- Talking to humans?!<br />
<br />
<br />
He has a human girlfriend.<br />
And they make out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make out? Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
We do not.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You wish you could.<br />
- Whose side are you on?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.<br />
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, this is what you want<br />
to do with your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do it for all our lives.<br />
Nobody works harder than bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, I remember you<br />
coming home so overworked<br />
<br />
<br />
your hands were still stirring.<br />
You couldn't stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
I remember that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What right do they have to our honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
We live on two cups a year. They put it<br />
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!<br />
<br />
<br />
Even if it's true, what can one bee do?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sting them where it really hurts.<br />
<br />
<br />
In the face! The eye!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That would hurt.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Up the nose? That's a killer.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's only one place you can sting<br />
the humans, one place where it matters.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hive at Five, the hive's only<br />
full-hour action news source.<br />
<br />
<br />
No more bee beards!<br />
<br />
<br />
With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Weather with Storm Stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sports with Buzz Larvi.<br />
<br />
<br />
And Jeanette Chung.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.<br />
- And I'm Jeanette Chung.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,<br />
<br />
<br />
intends to sue the human race<br />
for stealing our honey,<br />
<br />
<br />
packaging it and profiting<br />
from it illegally!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,<br />
<br />
<br />
we'll have three former queens here in<br />
our studio, discussing their new book,<br />
<br />
<br />
Classy Ladies,<br />
out this week on Hexagon.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
Did you ever think, "I'm a kid<br />
from the hive. I can't do this"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have never been afraid<br />
to change the world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What about Bee Columbus?<br />
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?<br />
<br />
<br />
Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
We were thinking<br />
of stickball or candy stores.<br />
<br />
<br />
How old are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee community<br />
is supporting you in this case,<br />
<br />
<br />
which will be the trial<br />
of the bee century.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, they have a Larry King<br />
in the human world too.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a common name. Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
He looks like you and has a show<br />
and suspenders and colored dots...<br />
<br />
<br />
Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the<br />
guest even though you just heard 'em.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bear Week next week!<br />
They're scary, hairy and here live.<br />
<br />
<br />
Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,<br />
squinty eyes, very Jewish.<br />
<br />
<br />
In tennis, you attack<br />
at the point of weakness!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey, her backhand's a joke!<br />
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Quiet, please.<br />
Actual work going on here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that that same bee?<br />
- Yes, it is!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm helping him sue the human race.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hello.<br />
- Hello, bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size<br />
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does he talk again?<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, you better go<br />
'cause we're really busy working.<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's our yogurt night!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye-bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why is yogurt night so difficult?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You poor thing.<br />
You two have been at this for hours!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, and Adam here<br />
has been a huge help.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Frosting...<br />
- How many sugars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Just one. I try not<br />
to use the competition.<br />
<br />
<br />
So why are you helping me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have good qualities.<br />
<br />
<br />
And it takes my mind off the shop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Instead of flowers, people<br />
are giving balloon bouquets now.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those are great, if you're three.<br />
<br />
<br />
And artificial flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, those just get me psychotic!<br />
- Yeah, me too.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bent stingers, pointless pollination.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees must hate those fake things!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nothing worse<br />
than a daffodil that's had work done.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this could make up<br />
for it a little bit.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.<br />
- I guess.<br />
<br />
<br />
You sure you want to go through with it?<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I sure? When I'm done with<br />
the humans, they won't be able<br />
<br />
<br />
to say, "Honey, I'm home,"<br />
without paying a royalty!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's an incredible scene<br />
here in downtown Manhattan,<br />
<br />
<br />
where the world anxiously waits,<br />
because for the first time in history,<br />
<br />
<br />
we will hear for ourselves<br />
if a honeybee can actually speak.<br />
<br />
<br />
What have we gotten into here, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's pretty big, isn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe how many humans<br />
don't work during the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think billion-dollar multinational<br />
food companies have good lawyers?<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody needs to stay<br />
behind the barricade.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's the matter?<br />
- I don't know, I just got a chill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, if it isn't the bee team.<br />
<br />
<br />
You boys work on this?<br />
<br />
<br />
All rise! The Honorable<br />
Judge Bumbleton presiding.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Case number 4475,<br />
<br />
<br />
Superior Court of New York,<br />
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry<br />
<br />
<br />
is now in session.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery, you're representing<br />
the five food companies collectively?<br />
<br />
<br />
A privilege.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson... you're representing<br />
all the bees of the world?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,<br />
we're ready to proceed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery,<br />
your opening statement, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,<br />
<br />
<br />
my grandmother was a simple woman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Born on a farm, she believed<br />
it was man's divine right<br />
<br />
<br />
to benefit from the bounty<br />
of nature God put before us.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we lived in the topsy-turvy world<br />
Mr. Benson imagines,<br />
<br />
<br />
just think of what would it mean.<br />
<br />
<br />
I would have to negotiate<br />
with the silkworm<br />
<br />
<br />
for the elastic in my britches!<br />
<br />
<br />
Talking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we know this isn't some sort of<br />
<br />
<br />
holographic motion-picture-capture<br />
Hollywood wizardry?<br />
<br />
<br />
They could be using laser beams!<br />
<br />
<br />
Robotics! Ventriloquism!<br />
Cloning! For all we know,<br />
<br />
<br />
he could be on steroids!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen,<br />
there's no trickery here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just an ordinary bee.<br />
Honey's pretty important to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's important to all bees.<br />
We invented it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We make it. And we protect it<br />
with our lives.<br />
<br />
<br />
Unfortunately, there are<br />
some people in this room<br />
<br />
<br />
who think they can take it from us<br />
<br />
<br />
'cause we're the little guys!<br />
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,<br />
<br />
<br />
you'll see how, by taking our honey,<br />
you not only take everything we have<br />
<br />
<br />
but everything we are!<br />
<br />
<br />
I wish he'd dress like that<br />
all the time. So nice!<br />
<br />
<br />
Call your first witness.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden<br />
of Honey Farms, big company you have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I suppose so.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see you also own<br />
Honeyburton and Honron!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, they provide beekeepers<br />
for our farms.<br />
<br />
<br />
Beekeeper. I find that<br />
to be a very disturbing term.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't imagine you employ<br />
any bee-free-ers, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- I couldn't hear you.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Because you don't free bees.<br />
You keep bees. Not only that,<br />
<br />
<br />
it seems you thought a bear would be<br />
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're very lovable creatures.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.<br />
<br />
<br />
You mean like this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bears kill bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
How'd you like his head crashing<br />
through your living room?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Biting into your couch!<br />
Spitting out your throw pillows!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, that's enough. Take him away.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.<br />
Your name intrigues me.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where have I heard it before?<br />
- I was with a band called The Police.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you've never been<br />
a police officer, have you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I haven't.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, you haven't. And so here<br />
we have yet another example<br />
<br />
<br />
of bee culture casually<br />
stolen by a human<br />
<br />
<br />
for nothing more than<br />
a prance-about stage name.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?<br />
<br />
<br />
Because I'm feeling<br />
a little stung, Sting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's not his real name?! You idiots!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Liotta, first,<br />
belated congratulations on<br />
<br />
<br />
your Emmy win for a guest spot<br />
on ER in 2005.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. Thank you.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see from your resume<br />
that you're devilishly handsome<br />
<br />
<br />
with a churning inner turmoil<br />
that's ready to blow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?<br />
<br />
<br />
Not yet it isn't. But is this<br />
what it's come to for you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Exploiting tiny, helpless bees<br />
so you don't<br />
<br />
<br />
have to rehearse<br />
your part and learn your lines, sir?<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch it, Benson!<br />
I could blow right now!<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't a goodfella.<br />
This is a badfella!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why doesn't someone just step on<br />
this creep, and we can all go home?!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Order in this court!<br />
- You're all thinking it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order, I say!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Say it!<br />
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think it was awfully nice<br />
of that bear to pitch in like that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I think the jury's on our side.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we doing everything right, legally?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Well, here's to a great team.<br />
<br />
<br />
To a great team!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ken!<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think you were coming.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I was just late.<br />
I tried to call, but... the battery.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't want all this to go to waste,<br />
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that was lucky.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a little left.<br />
I could heat it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not much for the game myself.<br />
The ball's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's where I usually sit.<br />
Right... there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,<br />
<br />
<br />
and he agreed with me that eating with<br />
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think I don't see what you're doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how hard it is to find<br />
the rightjob. We have that in common.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do we?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have 100 percent employment,<br />
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's just what<br />
I was thinking about doing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor<br />
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to drain the old stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, you do that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at that.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I've just about had it<br />
<br />
<br />
with your little mind games.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's that?<br />
- Italian Vogue.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.<br />
<br />
<br />
A lot of ads.<br />
<br />
<br />
Remember what Van said, why is<br />
your life more valuable than mine?<br />
<br />
<br />
Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think something stinks in here!<br />
<br />
<br />
I love the smell of flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
How do you like the smell of flames?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Not as much.<br />
<br />
<br />
Water bug! Not taking sides!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat!<br />
This is pathetic!<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got issues!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, well, well, a royal flush!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're bluffing.<br />
- Am I?<br />
<br />
<br />
Surf's up, dude!<br />
<br />
<br />
Poo water!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bowl is gnarly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Except for those dirty yellow rings!<br />
<br />
<br />
Kenneth! What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I don't even like honey!<br />
I don't eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We need to talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's just a little bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
And he happens to be<br />
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!<br />
<br />
<br />
Long time? What are you talking about?!<br />
Are there other bugs in your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, but there are other things bugging<br />
me in life. And you're one of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...<br />
<br />
<br />
My nerves are fried from riding<br />
on this emotional roller coaster!<br />
<br />
<br />
Goodbye, Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
And for your information,<br />
<br />
<br />
I prefer sugar-free, artificial<br />
sweeteners made by man!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry about all that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's got<br />
an aftertaste! I like it!<br />
<br />
<br />
I always felt there was some kind<br />
of barrier between Ken and me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I couldn't overcome it.<br />
Oh, well.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you OK for the trial?<br />
<br />
<br />
I believe Mr. Montgomery<br />
is about out of ideas.<br />
<br />
<br />
We would like to call<br />
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good idea! You can really see why he's<br />
considered one of the best lawyers...<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Layton, you've<br />
gotta weave some magic<br />
<br />
<br />
with this jury,<br />
or it's gonna be all over.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't worry. The only thing I have<br />
to do to turn this jury around<br />
<br />
<br />
is to remind them<br />
of what they don't like about bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got the tweezers?<br />
- Are you allergic?<br />
<br />
<br />
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you<br />
what I think we'd all like to know.<br />
<br />
<br />
What exactly is your relationship<br />
<br />
<br />
to that woman?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good friends?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How good? Do you live together?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute...<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you her little...<br />
<br />
<br />
...bedbug?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've seen a bee documentary or two.<br />
From what I understand,<br />
<br />
<br />
doesn't your queen give birth<br />
to all the bee children?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yeah, but...<br />
- So those aren't your real parents!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, Barry...<br />
- Yes, they are!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold me back!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're an illegitimate bee,<br />
aren't you, Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's denouncing bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't y'all date your cousins?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Objection!<br />
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, don't! It's what he wants!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I'm hit!!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, lordy, I am hit!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
The venom! The venom<br />
is coursing through my veins!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have been felled<br />
by a winged beast of destruction!<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? You can't treat them<br />
like equals! They're striped savages!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stinging's the only thing<br />
they know! It's their way!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Adam, stay with me.<br />
- I can't feel my legs.<br />
<br />
<br />
What angel of mercy<br />
will come forward to suck the poison<br />
<br />
<br />
from my heaving buttocks?<br />
<br />
<br />
I will have order in this court. Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order, please!<br />
<br />
<br />
The case of the honeybees<br />
versus the human race<br />
<br />
<br />
took a pointed turn against the bees<br />
<br />
<br />
yesterday when one of their legal<br />
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, buddy.<br />
- Hey.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is there much pain?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I...<br />
<br />
<br />
I blew the whole case, didn't I?<br />
<br />
<br />
It doesn't matter. What matters is<br />
you're alive. You could have died.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd be better off dead. Look at me.<br />
<br />
<br />
They got it from the cafeteria<br />
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look, there's<br />
a little celery still on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was it like to sting someone?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't explain it. It was all...<br />
<br />
<br />
All adrenaline and then...<br />
and then ecstasy!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think it was all a trap?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. I'm sorry.<br />
I flew us right into this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were we thinking? Look at us. We're<br />
just a couple of bugs in this world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What will the humans do to us<br />
if they win?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I hear they put the roaches in motels.<br />
That doesn't sound so bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, they check in,<br />
but they don't check out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Could you get a nurse<br />
to close that window?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why?<br />
- The smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke!<br />
But some bees are smoking.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's it! That's our case!<br />
<br />
<br />
It is? It's not over?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
Get back to the court and stall.<br />
Stall any way you can.<br />
<br />
<br />
And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes? Yes, Your Honor!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the rest of your team?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as a result,<br />
we don't make very good time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I actually heard a funny story about...<br />
<br />
<br />
Your Honor,<br />
haven't these ridiculous bugs<br />
<br />
<br />
taken up enough<br />
of this court's valuable time?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will we allow<br />
these absurd shenanigans to go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
They have presented no compelling<br />
evidence to support their charges<br />
<br />
<br />
against my clients,<br />
who run legitimate businesses.<br />
<br />
<br />
I move for a complete dismissal<br />
of this entire case!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going<br />
<br />
<br />
to have to consider<br />
Mr. Montgomery's motion.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you can't! We have a terrific case.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is your proof?<br />
Where is the evidence?<br />
<br />
<br />
Show me the smoking gun!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, Your Honor!<br />
You want a smoking gun?<br />
<br />
<br />
Here is your smoking gun.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is that?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee smoker!<br />
<br />
<br />
What, this?<br />
This harmless little contraption?<br />
<br />
<br />
This couldn't hurt a fly,<br />
let alone a bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at what has happened<br />
<br />
<br />
to bees who have never been asked,<br />
"Smoking or non?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is this what nature intended for us?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be forcibly addicted<br />
to smoke machines<br />
<br />
<br />
and man-made wooden slat work camps?<br />
<br />
<br />
Living out our lives as honey slaves<br />
to the white man?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What are we gonna do?<br />
- He's playing the species card.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen, please,<br />
free these bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
The court finds in favor of the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, we won!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew you could do it! High-five!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm OK! You know what this means?<br />
<br />
<br />
All the honey<br />
will finally belong to the bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Now we won't have<br />
to work so hard all the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is an unholy perversion<br />
of the balance of nature, Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll regret this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, how much honey is out there?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. One at a time.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, who are you wearing?<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweater is Ralph Lauren,<br />
and I have no pants.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if Montgomery's right?<br />
- What do you mean?<br />
<br />
<br />
We've been living the bee way<br />
a long time, 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
Congratulations on your victory.<br />
What will you demand as a settlement?<br />
<br />
<br />
First, we'll demand a complete shutdown<br />
of all bee work camps.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then we want back the honey<br />
that was ours to begin with,<br />
<br />
<br />
every last drop.<br />
<br />
<br />
We demand an end to the glorification<br />
of the bear as anything more<br />
<br />
<br />
than a filthy, smelly,<br />
bad-breath stink machine.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're all aware<br />
of what they do in the woods.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait for my signal.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
He'll have nauseous<br />
for a few hours, then he'll be fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
And we will no longer tolerate<br />
bee-negative nicknames...<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's just a prance-about stage name!<br />
<br />
<br />
...unnecessary inclusion of honey<br />
in bogus health products<br />
<br />
<br />
and la-dee-da human<br />
tea-time snack garnishments.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can't breathe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it in, boys!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it right there! Good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tap it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,<br />
and there's gallons more coming!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I think we need to shut down!<br />
- Shut down? We've never shut down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shut down honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop making honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn your key, sir!<br />
<br />
<br />
What do we do now?<br />
<br />
<br />
Cannonball!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're shutting honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mission abort.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aborting pollination and nectar detail.<br />
Returning to base.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, you wouldn't believe<br />
how much honey was out there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah?<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Where is everybody?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Are they out celebrating?<br />
- They're home.<br />
<br />
<br />
They don't know what to do.<br />
Laying out, sleeping in.<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way<br />
to San Antonio with a cricket.<br />
<br />
<br />
At least we got our honey back.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I think, so what if humans<br />
liked our honey? Who wouldn't?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the greatest thing in the world!<br />
I was excited to be part of making it.<br />
<br />
<br />
This was my new desk. This was my<br />
new job. I wanted to do it really well.<br />
<br />
<br />
And now...<br />
<br />
<br />
Now I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand<br />
why they're not happy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought their lives would be better!<br />
<br />
<br />
They're doing nothing. It's amazing.<br />
Honey really changes people.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have any idea<br />
what's going on, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What did you want to show me?<br />
- This.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
That is not the half of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're all wilting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Doesn't look very good, does it?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
And whose fault do you think that is?<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I'm gonna guess bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees?<br />
<br />
<br />
Specifically, me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think bees not needing to make<br />
honey would affect all these things.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's notjust flowers.<br />
Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our whole SAT test right there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take away produce, that affects<br />
the entire animal kingdom.<br />
<br />
<br />
And then, of course...<br />
<br />
<br />
The human species?<br />
<br />
<br />
So if there's no more pollination,<br />
<br />
<br />
it could all just go south here,<br />
couldn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know this is also partly my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about a suicide pact?<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we do it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'll sting you, you step on me.<br />
- Thatjust kills you twice.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, Barry...<br />
sorry, but I gotta get going.<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to open my mouth and talk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa?<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa? Why are you leaving?<br />
Where are you going?<br />
<br />
<br />
To the final Tournament of Roses parade<br />
in Pasadena.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've moved it to this weekend<br />
because all the flowers are dying.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the last chance<br />
I'll ever have to see it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.<br />
I never meant it to turn out like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Me neither.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses.<br />
Roses can't do sports.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Roses are flowers!<br />
- Yes, they are.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers, bees, pollen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I know.<br />
That's why this is the last parade.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe not.<br />
Could you ask him to slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Could you slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, I made a huge mistake.<br />
This is a total disaster, all my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, it kind of is.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've ruined the planet.<br />
I wanted to help you<br />
<br />
<br />
with the flower shop.<br />
I've made it worse.<br />
<br />
<br />
Actually, it's completely closed down.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought maybe you were remodeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I have another idea, and it's<br />
greater than my previous ideas combined.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to hear it!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, they have the roses,<br />
the roses have the pollen.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know every bee, plant<br />
and flower bud in this park.<br />
<br />
<br />
All we gotta do is get what they've got<br />
back here with what we've got.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees.<br />
- Park.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Pollen!<br />
- Flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Repollination!<br />
- Across the nation!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses,<br />
Pasadena, California.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've got nothing<br />
but flowers, floats and cotton candy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Security will be tight.<br />
<br />
<br />
I have an idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa Bloome, FTD.<br />
<br />
<br />
Official floral business. It's real.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. It was a gift.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once inside,<br />
we just pick the right float.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about The Princess and the Pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could be the princess,<br />
and you could be the pea!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, I got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where should I sit?<br />
- What are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I believe I'm the pea.<br />
- The pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
It goes under the mattresses.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.<br />
- I'm getting the marshal.<br />
<br />
<br />
You do that!<br />
This whole parade is a fiasco!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's see what this baby'll do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, what are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then all we do<br />
is blend in with traffic...<br />
<br />
<br />
...without arousing suspicion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once at the airport,<br />
there's no stopping us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop! Security.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You and your insect pack your float?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Has it been<br />
in your possession the entire time?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you remove your shoes?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Remove your stinger.<br />
- It's part of me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Just having some fun.<br />
Enjoy your flight.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then if we're lucky, we'll have<br />
just enough pollen to do the job.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can you believe how lucky we are? We<br />
have just enough pollen to do the job!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think this is gonna work.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got to work.<br />
<br />
<br />
Attention, passengers,<br />
this is Captain Scott.<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a bit of bad weather<br />
in New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
It looks like we'll experience<br />
a couple hours delay.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, these are cut flowers<br />
with no water. They'll never make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get up there<br />
and talk to them.<br />
<br />
<br />
Be careful.<br />
<br />
<br />
Can I get help<br />
with the Sky Mall magazine?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd like to order the talking<br />
inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.<br />
<br />
<br />
Captain, I'm in a real situation.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you say, Hal?<br />
- Nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't freak out! My entire species...<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!<br />
- Who's an attorney?<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good afternoon, passengers.<br />
This is your captain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B<br />
please report to the cockpit?<br />
<br />
<br />
And please hurry!<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
There was a DustBuster,<br />
a toupee, a life raft exploded.<br />
<br />
<br />
One's bald, one's in a boat,<br />
they're both unconscious!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that another bee joke?<br />
- No!<br />
<br />
<br />
No one's flying the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.<br />
What's your status?<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Vanessa Bloome.<br />
I'm a florist from New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where's the pilot?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's unconscious,<br />
and so is the copilot.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not good. Does anyone onboard<br />
have flight experience?<br />
<br />
<br />
As a matter of fact, there is.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Who's that?<br />
- Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
From the honey trial?! Oh, great.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, this is nothing more<br />
than a big metal bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got giant wings, huge engines.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How hard could it be?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, Barry!<br />
We're headed into some lightning.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Bob Bumble. We have some<br />
late-breaking news from JFK Airport,<br />
<br />
<br />
where a suspenseful scene<br />
is developing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry Benson,<br />
fresh from his legal victory...<br />
<br />
<br />
That's Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
...is attempting to land a plane,<br />
loaded with people, flowers<br />
<br />
<br />
and an incapacitated flight crew.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers?!<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a storm in the area<br />
and two individuals at the controls<br />
<br />
<br />
with absolutely no flight experience.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a minute.<br />
There's a bee on that plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson<br />
and his no-account compadres.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've done enough damage.<br />
<br />
<br />
But isn't he your only hope?<br />
<br />
<br />
Technically, a bee<br />
shouldn't be able to fly at all.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their wings are too small...<br />
<br />
<br />
Haven't we heard this a million times?<br />
<br />
<br />
"The surface area of the wings<br />
and body mass make no sense."<br />
<br />
<br />
- Get this on the air!<br />
- Got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Stand by.<br />
- We're going live.<br />
<br />
<br />
The way we work may be a mystery to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Making honey takes a lot of bees<br />
doing a lot of small jobs.<br />
<br />
<br />
But let me tell you about a small job.<br />
<br />
<br />
If you do it well,<br />
it makes a big difference.<br />
<br />
<br />
More than we realized.<br />
To us, to everyone.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why I want to get bees<br />
back to working together.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the bee way!<br />
We're not made of Jell-O.<br />
<br />
<br />
We get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow!<br />
- Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
Left, right, down, hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hover?<br />
- Forget hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't so hard.<br />
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, what happened?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, I think we were<br />
on autopilot the whole time.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That may have been helping me.<br />
- And now we're not!<br />
<br />
<br />
So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, let's get<br />
behind this fellow! Move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Move out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,<br />
you copy me with the wings of the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't have to yell.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not yelling!<br />
We're in a lot of trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's very hard to concentrate<br />
with that panicky tone in your voice!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's not a tone. I'm panicking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't do this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, pull yourself together.<br />
You have to snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hold it!<br />
- Why? Come on, it's my turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
How is the plane flying?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Benson, got any flowers<br />
for a happy occasion in there?<br />
<br />
<br />
The Pollen Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
They do get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow.<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, let's drop this tin can<br />
on the blacktop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where? I can't see anything. Can you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, nothing. It's all cloudy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Come on. You got to think bee, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute.<br />
I think I'm feeling something.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring the nose down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What in the world is on the tarmac?<br />
- Get some lights on that!<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, aim for the flower.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
Out the engines. We're going in<br />
on bee power. Ready, boys?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative!<br />
<br />
<br />
Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Land on that flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ready? Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spin it around!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not that flower! The other one!<br />
- Which one?<br />
<br />
<br />
- That flower.<br />
- I'm aiming at the flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.<br />
I mean the giant pulsating flower<br />
<br />
<br />
made of millions of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Rotate around it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This is insane, Barry!<br />
- This's the only way I know how to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane<br />
flying in an insect-like pattern?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.<br />
Smell it. Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just drop it. Be a part of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aim for the center!<br />
<br />
<br />
Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!<br />
<br />
<br />
Come on, already.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, we did it!<br />
You taught me how to fly!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yes. No high-five!<br />
- Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, it worked!<br />
Did you see the giant flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
What giant flower? Where? Of course<br />
I saw the flower! That was genius!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- But we're not done yet.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, everyone!<br />
<br />
<br />
This runway is covered<br />
with the last pollen<br />
<br />
<br />
from the last flowers<br />
available anywhere on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
That means this is our last chance.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the only ones who make honey,<br />
pollinate flowers and dress like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we're gonna survive as a species,<br />
this is our moment! What do you say?<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we going to be bees, orjust<br />
Museum of Natural History keychains?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Keychain!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then follow me! Except Keychain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold on, Barry. Here.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've earned this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect<br />
fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mom! The bees are back!<br />
<br />
<br />
If anybody needs<br />
to make a call, now's the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I got a feeling we'll be<br />
working late tonight!<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's your change. Have a great<br />
afternoon! Can I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you like some honey with that?<br />
It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.<br />
<br />
<br />
Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.<br />
And I don't see a nickel!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I just feel<br />
like a piece of meat!<br />
<br />
<br />
I had no idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm sorry.<br />
Have you got a moment?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you excuse me?<br />
My mosquito associate will help you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I'm late.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's a lawyer too?<br />
<br />
<br />
I was already a blood-sucking parasite.<br />
All I needed was a briefcase.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have a great afternoon!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,<br />
and I can't get them anywhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
No problem, Vannie.<br />
Just leave it to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're a lifesaver, Barry.<br />
Can I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, scramble, jocks!<br />
It's time to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you, Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bee is living my life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let it go, Kenny.<br />
<br />
<br />
- When will this nightmare end?!<br />
- Let it all go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Beautiful day to fly.<br />
- Sure is.<br />
<br />
<br />
Between you and me,<br />
I was dying to get out of that office.<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got<br />
to start thinking bee, my friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee!<br />
- Me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it. Let's just stop<br />
for a second. Hold it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.<br />
Can we stop here?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not making a major life decision<br />
during a production number!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Take ten, everybody.<br />
Wrap it up, guys.</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20160926&diff=8064Minutes201609262016-09-27T08:08:27Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
Best GBGC evar<br />
Murphy did it<br />
Not nearly enough work<br />
The pirates sucked<br />
Star trek > work<br />
DYLAN<br />
Sonia saw Kubo and the Two Strings<br />
Cried twice<br />
MURPHY<br />
One board game<br />
11 musical artists over 1 day (slow your roll holy shit)<br />
3 beers<br />
2 cats<br />
5 golden rings<br />
RIN<br />
Everyone is pokemon<br />
Engineering design is dumb anyway<br />
HARRY<br />
[]<br />
JOE<br />
Computers suck<br />
NIKA<br />
Joined the Great Race!<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
Wagon Age Oregon<br />
KRA + GCGC: HvZ October 2nd DH 2210 7PM<br />
Lots of statistics jokes<br />
kill this meme<br />
Shadow The Hedgehog: damn<br />
Newt Gingrich is not actually a newt<br />
Murphy made a cool hat<br />
CMU is hard but we love you all <3<br />
Rin has the thing. Room reservations aren't their fault<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Motion to pass a statement of no confidence in the registrar's office<br />
It's a thing now deal with it<br />
Committee The Hedgehog Committee<br />
Stuffed horse we can continue beating off<br />
Tabled for ???<br />
Committee to protect horses<br />
Never again<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Joe $2<br />
Harry chairs it and nobody else<br />
My Little Animal Farm<br />
We killed all the others and we need more<br />
We did this to ourselves<br />
That passed<br />
Sold to Frosty $4<br />
Chaired by CMU bronies<br />
Wall Lickers Union<br />
Start licking walls<br />
It's just another lick in the wall<br />
My mom is trying really hard (asbestos pun here)<br />
Passed<br />
Sold to Steven $1<br />
Chaired by the agency (and sam)<br />
Allocation $50 for event<br />
It passed<br />
KGB Rave committee<br />
PEWEWWWWWWW WOMP WOMP<br />
Please don't burn down my house<br />
It passed <br />
Sold to Harry $1<br />
The guy who wrote that song<br />
Carnival Crime committee<br />
To see if you get a fair trial<br />
Ted Cruz isn't the zodiac killer<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Owen $2<br />
Chaired by The first clown we can co-opt into this<br />
[[The Bee Movie|THE BEE MOVIE]] POLICE<br />
<nowiki><br />
"According to all known laws<br />
of aviation,<br />
<br />
<br />
there is no way a bee<br />
should be able to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Its wings are too small to get<br />
its fat little body off the ground.<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee, of course, flies anyway<br />
<br />
<br />
because bees don't care<br />
what humans think is impossible.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooh, black and yellow!<br />
Let's shake it up a little.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry! Breakfast is ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Coming!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hang on a second.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry?<br />
- Adam?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oan you believe this is happening?<br />
- I can't. I'll pick you up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Looking sharp.<br />
<br />
<br />
Use the stairs. Your father<br />
paid good money for those.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry. I'm excited.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's the graduate.<br />
We're very proud of you, son.<br />
<br />
<br />
A perfect report card, all B's.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ma! I got a thing going here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got lint on your fuzz.<br />
- Ow! That's me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.<br />
- Bye!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I told you,<br />
stop flying in the house!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Adam.<br />
- Hey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that fuzz gel?<br />
- A little. Special day, graduation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Never thought I'd make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days grade school,<br />
three days high school.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those were awkward.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days college. I'm glad I took<br />
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did come back different.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, Barry.<br />
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hear about Frankie?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You going to the funeral?<br />
- No, I'm not going.<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody knows,<br />
sting someone, you die.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't waste it on a squirrel.<br />
Such a hothead.<br />
<br />
<br />
I guess he could have<br />
just gotten out of the way.<br />
<br />
<br />
I love this incorporating<br />
an amusement park into our day.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why we don't need vacations.<br />
<br />
<br />
Boy, quite a bit of pomp...<br />
under the circumstances.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, Adam, today we are men.<br />
- We are!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee-men.<br />
- Amen!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hallelujah!<br />
<br />
<br />
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,<br />
<br />
<br />
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome, New Hive Oity<br />
graduating class of...<br />
<br />
<br />
...9:15.<br />
<br />
<br />
That concludes our ceremonies.<br />
<br />
<br />
And begins your career<br />
at Honex Industries!<br />
<br />
<br />
Will we pick ourjob today?<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard it's just orientation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Heads up! Here we go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Keep your hands and antennas<br />
inside the tram at all times.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wonder what it'll be like?<br />
- A little scary.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome to Honex,<br />
a division of Honesco<br />
<br />
<br />
and a part of the Hexagon Group.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
We know that you, as a bee,<br />
have worked your whole life<br />
<br />
<br />
to get to the point where you<br />
can work for your whole life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen<br />
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our top-secret formula<br />
<br />
<br />
is automatically color-corrected,<br />
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured<br />
<br />
<br />
into this soothing sweet syrup<br />
<br />
<br />
with its distinctive<br />
golden glow you know as...<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That girl was hot.<br />
- She's my cousin!<br />
<br />
<br />
- She is?<br />
- Yes, we're all cousins.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Right. You're right.<br />
- At Honex, we constantly strive<br />
<br />
<br />
to improve every aspect<br />
of bee existence.<br />
<br />
<br />
These bees are stress-testing<br />
a new helmet technology.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What do you think he makes?<br />
- Not enough.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here we have our latest advancement,<br />
the Krelman.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What does that do?<br />
- Oatches that little strand of honey<br />
<br />
<br />
that hangs after you pour it.<br />
Saves us millions.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan anyone work on the Krelman?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. Most bee jobs are<br />
small ones. But bees know<br />
<br />
<br />
that every small job,<br />
if it's done well, means a lot.<br />
<br />
<br />
But choose carefully<br />
<br />
<br />
because you'll stay in the job<br />
you pick for the rest of your life.<br />
<br />
<br />
The same job the rest of your life?<br />
I didn't know that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's the difference?<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll be happy to know that bees,<br />
as a species, haven't had one day off<br />
<br />
<br />
in 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you'll just work us to death?<br />
<br />
<br />
We'll sure try.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! That blew my mind!<br />
<br />
<br />
"What's the difference?"<br />
How can you say that?<br />
<br />
<br />
One job forever?<br />
That's an insane choice to have to make.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm relieved. Now we only have<br />
to make one decision in life.<br />
<br />
<br />
But, Adam, how could they<br />
never have told us that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would you question anything?<br />
We're bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the most perfectly<br />
functioning society on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
You ever think maybe things<br />
work a little too well here?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like what? Give me one example.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. But you know<br />
what I'm talking about.<br />
<br />
<br />
Please clear the gate.<br />
Royal Nectar Force on approach.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a second. Oheck it out.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!<br />
- Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've never seen them this close.<br />
<br />
<br />
They know what it's like<br />
outside the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, but some don't come back.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Jocks!<br />
- Hi, Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
You guys did great!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're monsters!<br />
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I wonder where they were.<br />
- I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their day's not planned.<br />
<br />
<br />
Outside the hive, flying who knows<br />
where, doing who knows what.<br />
<br />
<br />
You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen<br />
Jock. You have to be bred for that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look. That's more pollen<br />
than you and I will see in a lifetime.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just a status symbol.<br />
Bees make too much of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it<br />
and the ladies see you wearing it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those ladies?<br />
Aren't they our cousins too?<br />
<br />
<br />
Distant. Distant.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at these two.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oouple of Hive Harrys.<br />
- Let's have fun with them.<br />
<br />
<br />
It must be dangerous<br />
being a Pollen Jock.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me<br />
against a mushroom!<br />
<br />
<br />
He had a paw on my throat,<br />
and with the other, he was slapping me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, my!<br />
- I never thought I'd knock him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were you doing during this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Trying to alert the authorities.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can autograph that.<br />
<br />
<br />
A little gusty out there today,<br />
wasn't it, comrades?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Gusty.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're hitting a sunflower patch<br />
six miles from here tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Six miles, huh?<br />
- Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
A puddle jump for us,<br />
but maybe you're not up for it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Maybe I am.<br />
- You are not!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.<br />
<br />
<br />
What do you think, buzzy-boy?<br />
Are you bee enough?<br />
<br />
<br />
I might be. It all depends<br />
on what 0900 means.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Honex!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, you surprised me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You decide what you're interested in?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, there's a lot of choices.<br />
- But you only get one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you ever get bored<br />
doing the same job every day?<br />
<br />
<br />
Son, let me tell you about stirring.<br />
<br />
<br />
You grab that stick, and you just<br />
move it around, and you stir it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You get yourself into a rhythm.<br />
It's a beautiful thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, Dad,<br />
the more I think about it,<br />
<br />
<br />
maybe the honey field<br />
just isn't right for me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You were thinking of what,<br />
making balloon animals?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a bad job<br />
for a guy with a stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Janet, your son's not sure<br />
he wants to go into honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.<br />
- I'm not trying to be funny.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're not funny! You're going<br />
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're gonna be a stirrer?<br />
- No one's listening to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait till you see the sticks I have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could say anything right now.<br />
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's open some honey and celebrate!<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.<br />
Shave my antennae.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shack up with a grasshopper. Get<br />
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're starting work today!<br />
- Today's the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on! All the good jobs<br />
will be gone.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,<br />
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is it still available?<br />
- Hang on. Two left!<br />
<br />
<br />
One of them's yours! Oongratulations!<br />
Step to the side.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you get?<br />
- Picking crud out. Stellar!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oouple of newbies?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make your choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You want to go first?<br />
- No, you go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my. What's available?<br />
<br />
<br />
Restroom attendant's open,<br />
not for the reason you think.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Any chance of getting the Krelman?<br />
- Sure, you're on.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wax monkey's always open.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Krelman opened up again.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee died. Makes an opening. See?<br />
He's dead. Another dead one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dead from the neck up.<br />
Dead from the neck down. That's life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, this is so hard!<br />
<br />
<br />
Heating, cooling,<br />
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,<br />
<br />
<br />
humming, inspector number seven,<br />
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,<br />
<br />
<br />
mite wrangler. Barry, what<br />
do you think I should... Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, we've got the sunflower patch<br />
in quadrant nine...<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened to you?<br />
Where are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm going out.<br />
- Out? Out where?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Out there.<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have to, before I go<br />
to work for the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Another call coming in.<br />
<br />
<br />
If anyone's feeling brave,<br />
there's a Korean deli on 83rd<br />
<br />
<br />
that gets their roses today.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, guys.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Look at that.<br />
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Really? Feeling lucky, are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sign here, here. Just initial that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got a rain advisory today,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as you all know,<br />
bees cannot fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
So be careful. As always,<br />
watch your brooms,<br />
<br />
<br />
hockey sticks, dogs,<br />
birds, bears and bats.<br />
<br />
<br />
Also, I got a couple of reports<br />
of root beer being poured on us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Murphy's in a home because of it,<br />
babbling like a cicada!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's awful.<br />
- And a reminder for you rookies,<br />
<br />
<br />
bee law number one,<br />
absolutely no talking to humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, launch positions!<br />
<br />
<br />
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,<br />
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!<br />
<br />
<br />
Black and yellow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
You ready for this, hot shot?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wind, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Antennae, check.<br />
- Nectar pack, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wings, check.<br />
- Stinger, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
Scared out of my shorts, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, ladies,<br />
<br />
<br />
let's move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pound those petunias,<br />
you striped stem-suckers!<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, drain those flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
So blue.<br />
<br />
<br />
I feel so fast and free!<br />
<br />
<br />
Box kite!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Blue Leader.<br />
We have roses visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand to the side, kid.<br />
It's got a bit of a kick.<br />
<br />
<br />
That is one nectar collector!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ever see pollination up close?<br />
- No, sir.<br />
<br />
<br />
I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it<br />
over here. Maybe a dash over there,<br />
<br />
<br />
a pinch on that one.<br />
See that? It's a little bit of magic.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's amazing. Why do we do that?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's pollen power. More pollen, more<br />
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oool.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.<br />
Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oopy that visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait. One of these flowers<br />
seems to be on the move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Say again? You're reporting<br />
a moving flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was on the line!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is the coolest. What is it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know, but I'm loving this color.<br />
<br />
<br />
It smells good.<br />
Not like a flower, but I like it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, fuzzy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ohemical-y.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweet lord of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oandy-brain, get off there!<br />
<br />
<br />
Problem!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Guys!<br />
- This could be bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very close.<br />
<br />
<br />
Gonna hurt.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mama's little boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
You are way out of position, rookie!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooming in at you like a missile!<br />
<br />
<br />
Help me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't think these are flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Should we tell him?<br />
- I think he knows.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Match point!<br />
<br />
<br />
You can start packing up, honey,<br />
because you're about to eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yowser!<br />
<br />
<br />
Gross.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a bee in the car!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do something!<br />
- I'm driving!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, bee.<br />
- He's back here!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's going to sting me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody move. If you don't move,<br />
he won't sting you. Freeze!<br />
<br />
<br />
He blinked!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spray him, Granny!<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow... the tension level<br />
out here is unbelievable.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get home.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oheck out my new resume.<br />
I made it into a fold-out brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? Folds out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this time. This time. This time.<br />
This time! This time! This...<br />
<br />
<br />
Drapes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That is diabolical.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's fantastic. It's got all my special<br />
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's number one? Star Wars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah, I don't go for that...<br />
<br />
<br />
...kind of stuff.<br />
<br />
<br />
No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.<br />
They're out of their minds.<br />
<br />
<br />
When I leave a job interview, they're<br />
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't remember the sun<br />
having a big 75 on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I predicted global warming.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could feel it getting hotter.<br />
At first I thought it was just me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait! Stop! Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand back. These are winter boots.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't kill him!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know I'm allergic to them!<br />
This thing could kill me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have<br />
less value than yours?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have any less value<br />
than mine? Is that your statement?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just saying all life has value. You<br />
don't know what he's capable of feeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
My brochure!<br />
<br />
<br />
There you go, little guy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not scared of him.<br />
It's an allergic thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Put that on your resume brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My whole face could puff up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Make it one of your special skills.<br />
<br />
<br />
Knocking someone out<br />
is also a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?<br />
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You could put carob chips on there.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Supposed to be less calories.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life.<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, here it goes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah.<br />
<br />
<br />
What would I say?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could really get in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee law.<br />
You're not supposed to talk to a human.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm doing this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got to.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!<br />
<br />
<br />
No. Yes. No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do it. I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
How should I start it?<br />
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here she comes! Speak, you fool!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hi!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're talking.<br />
- Yes, I know.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, it's OK. It's fine.<br />
I know I'm dreaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I don't recall going to bed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I'm sure this<br />
is very disconcerting.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is a bit of a surprise to me.<br />
I mean, you're a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
I am. And I'm not supposed<br />
to be doing this,<br />
<br />
<br />
but they were all trying to kill me.<br />
<br />
<br />
And if it wasn't for you...<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to thank you.<br />
It's just how I was raised.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was a little weird.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm talking with a bee.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm talking to a bee.<br />
And the bee is talking to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I just want to say I'm grateful.<br />
I'll leave now.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait! How did you learn to do that?<br />
- What?<br />
<br />
<br />
The talking thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Same way you did, I guess.<br />
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's very funny.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,<br />
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I...<br />
<br />
<br />
...get you something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. I mean...<br />
I don't know. Ooffee?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to put you out.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's just coffee.<br />
- I hate to impose.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Don't be ridiculous!<br />
- Actually, I would love a cup.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, you want rum cake?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I shouldn't.<br />
- Have some.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No, I can't.<br />
- Oome on!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where?<br />
- These stripes don't help.<br />
<br />
<br />
You look great!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know if you know<br />
anything about fashion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you all right?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's making the tie in the cab<br />
as they're flying up Madison.<br />
<br />
<br />
He finally gets there.<br />
<br />
<br />
He runs up the steps into the church.<br />
The wedding is on.<br />
<br />
<br />
And he says, "Watermelon?<br />
I thought you said Guatemalan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would I marry a watermelon?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is that a bee joke?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the kind of stuff we do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, different.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, what are you gonna do, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
About work? I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do my part for the hive,<br />
but I can't do it the way they want.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how you feel.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You do?<br />
- Sure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or<br />
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Really?<br />
- My only interest is flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our new queen was just elected<br />
with that same campaign slogan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, if you look...<br />
<br />
<br />
There's my hive right there. See it?<br />
<br />
<br />
You're in Sheep Meadow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!<br />
<br />
<br />
No way! I know that area.<br />
I lost a toe ring there once.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why do girls put rings on their toes?<br />
- Why not?<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's like putting a hat on your knee.<br />
- Maybe I'll try that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You all right, ma'am?<br />
- Oh, yeah. Fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just having two cups of coffee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, this has been great.<br />
Thanks for the coffee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it's no trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,<br />
I'd be up the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you...?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I take a piece of this with me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sure! Here, have a crumb.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thanks!<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Well, then...<br />
I guess I'll see you around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or not.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
And thank you<br />
so much again... for before.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that? That was nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
This can't possibly work.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's all set to go.<br />
We may as well try it.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Dave, pull the chute.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Sounds amazing.<br />
- It was amazing!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was the scariest,<br />
happiest moment of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Humans! I can't believe<br />
you were with humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
Giant, scary humans!<br />
What were they like?<br />
<br />
<br />
Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
They eat crazy giant things.<br />
They drive crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?<br />
- Some of them. But some of them don't.<br />
<br />
<br />
- How'd you get back?<br />
- Poodle.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw<br />
whatever you wanted to see.<br />
<br />
<br />
You had your "experience." Now you<br />
can pick out yourjob and be normal.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well...<br />
- Well?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I met someone.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did? Was she Bee-ish?<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!<br />
- No, no, no, not a wasp.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Spider?<br />
- I'm not attracted to spiders.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's the hottest thing,<br />
with the eight legs and all.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't get by that face.<br />
<br />
<br />
So who is she?<br />
<br />
<br />
She's... human.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, no. That's a bee law.<br />
You wouldn't break a bee law.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Her name's Vanessa.<br />
- Oh, boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
She's so nice. And she's a florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're not dating.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're flying outside the hive, talking<br />
to humans that attack our homes<br />
<br />
<br />
with power washers and M-80s!<br />
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life!<br />
And she understands me.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is over!<br />
<br />
<br />
Eat this.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is not over! What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
- They call it a crumb.<br />
- It was so stingin' stripey!<br />
<br />
<br />
And that's not what they eat.<br />
That's what falls off what they eat!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You know what a Oinnabon is?<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.<br />
They heat it up...<br />
<br />
<br />
Sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
...really hot!<br />
- Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
We are not them! We're us.<br />
There's us and there's them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, but who can deny<br />
the heart that is yearning?<br />
<br />
<br />
There's no yearning.<br />
Stop yearning. Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got to start thinking bee,<br />
my friend. Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
There he is. He's in the pool.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know what your problem is, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta start thinking bee?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will this go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's been three days!<br />
Why aren't you working?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got a lot of big life decisions<br />
to think about.<br />
<br />
<br />
What life? You have no life!<br />
You have no job. You're barely a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Would it kill you<br />
to make a little honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, come out.<br />
Your father's talking to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Martin, would you talk to him?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm talking to you!<br />
<br />
<br />
You coming?<br />
<br />
<br />
Got everything?<br />
<br />
<br />
All set!<br />
<br />
<br />
Go ahead. I'll catch up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't be too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're still here.<br />
- I told you not to yell at him.<br />
<br />
<br />
He doesn't respond to yelling!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Then why yell at me?<br />
- Because you don't listen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not listening to this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, I've gotta go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where are you going?<br />
- I'm meeting a friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
A girl? Is this why you can't decide?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I just hope she's Bee-ish.<br />
<br />
<br />
They have a huge parade<br />
of flowers every year in Pasadena?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be in the Tournament of Roses,<br />
that's every florist's dream!<br />
<br />
<br />
Up on a float, surrounded<br />
by flowers, crowds cheering.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tournament. Do the roses<br />
compete in athletic events?<br />
<br />
<br />
No. All right, I've got one.<br />
How come you don't fly everywhere?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's exhausting. Why don't you<br />
run everywhere? It's faster.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, OK, I see, I see.<br />
All right, your turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?<br />
That's insane!<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have that?<br />
<br />
<br />
We have Hivo, but it's a disease.<br />
It's a horrible, horrible disease.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dumb bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You must want to sting all those jerks.<br />
<br />
<br />
We try not to sting.<br />
It's usually fatal for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you have to watch your temper.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very carefully.<br />
You kick a wall, take a walk,<br />
<br />
<br />
write an angry letter and throw it out.<br />
Work through it like any emotion:<br />
<br />
<br />
Anger, jealousy, lust.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is wrong with you?!<br />
- It's a bug.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's not bothering anybody.<br />
Get out of here, you creep!<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it was. How did you know?<br />
<br />
<br />
It felt like about 10 pages.<br />
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've really got that<br />
down to a science.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.<br />
- I'll bet.<br />
<br />
<br />
What in the name<br />
of Mighty Hercules is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
How did this get here?<br />
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,<br />
<br />
<br />
Ray Liotta Private Select?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is he that actor?<br />
- I never heard of him.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why is this here?<br />
- For people. We eat it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have<br />
enough food of your own?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, yes.<br />
- How do you get it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees make it.<br />
- I know who makes it!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's hard to make it!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's heating, cooling, stirring.<br />
You need a whole Krelman thing!<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's organic.<br />
- It's our-ganic!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just honey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just what?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't know about this!<br />
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!<br />
<br />
<br />
You've taken our homes, schools,<br />
hospitals! This is all we have!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's on sale?!<br />
I'm getting to the bottom of this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm getting to the bottom<br />
of all of this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Hector.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You almost done?<br />
- Almost.<br />
<br />
<br />
He is here. I sense it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I guess I'll go home now<br />
<br />
<br />
and just leave this nice honey out,<br />
with no one around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're busted, box boy!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I heard something.<br />
So you can talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can talk.<br />
And now you'll start talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where you getting the sweet stuff?<br />
Who's your supplier?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand.<br />
I thought we were friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
The last thing we want<br />
to do is upset bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're too late! It's ours now!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, have crossed<br />
the wrong sword!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, will be lunch<br />
for my iguana, Ignacio!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the honey coming from?<br />
<br />
<br />
Tell me where!<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!<br />
<br />
<br />
Orazy person!<br />
<br />
<br />
What horrible thing has happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
These faces, they never knew<br />
what hit them. And now<br />
<br />
<br />
they're on the road to nowhere!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just keep still.<br />
<br />
<br />
What? You're not dead?<br />
<br />
<br />
Do I look dead? They will wipe anything<br />
that moves. Where you headed?<br />
<br />
<br />
To Honey Farms.<br />
I am onto something huge here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,<br />
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Tacoma.<br />
<br />
<br />
- And you?<br />
- He really is dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Uh-oh!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is that?!<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wiper! Triple blade!<br />
- Triple blade?<br />
<br />
<br />
Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does everything have<br />
to be so doggone clean?!<br />
<br />
<br />
How much do you people need to see?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Open your eyes!<br />
Stick your head out the window!<br />
<br />
<br />
From NPR News in Washington,<br />
I'm Oarl Kasell.<br />
<br />
<br />
But don't kill no more bugs!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee!<br />
- Moose blood guy!!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You hear something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like tiny screaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn off the radio.<br />
<br />
<br />
Whassup, bee boy?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Blood.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a row of honey jars,<br />
as far as the eye could see.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
I assume wherever this truck goes<br />
is where they're getting it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I mean, that honey's ours.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees hang tight.<br />
- We're all jammed in.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a close community.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not us, man. We on our own.<br />
Every mosquito on his own.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if you get in trouble?<br />
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody likes us. They just smack.<br />
See a mosquito, smack, smack!<br />
<br />
<br />
At least you're out in the world.<br />
You must meet girls.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girls try to trade up,<br />
get with a moth, dragonfly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got to be kidding me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mooseblood's about to leave<br />
the building! So long, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, guys!<br />
- Mooseblood!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I'd catch y'all down here.<br />
Did you bring your crazy straw?<br />
<br />
<br />
We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,<br />
and it's pretty much pure profit.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this place?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee's got a brain<br />
the size of a pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
They are pinheads!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oheck out the new smoker.<br />
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Thomas 3000!<br />
<br />
<br />
Smoker?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.<br />
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.<br />
<br />
<br />
A couple breaths of this<br />
knocks them right out.<br />
<br />
<br />
They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money.<br />
<br />
<br />
"They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my!<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. It doesn't last too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you know you're<br />
in a fake hive with fake walls?<br />
<br />
<br />
Our queen was moved here.<br />
We had no choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is your queen?<br />
That's a man in women's clothes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a drag queen!<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's hundreds of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our honey is being brazenly stolen<br />
on a massive scale!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is worse than anything bears<br />
have done! I intend to do something.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry, stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Who told you humans are taking<br />
our honey? That's a rumor.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do these look like rumors?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a conspiracy theory.<br />
These are obviously doctored photos.<br />
<br />
<br />
How did you get mixed up in this?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's been talking to humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- Talking to humans?!<br />
<br />
<br />
He has a human girlfriend.<br />
And they make out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make out? Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
We do not.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You wish you could.<br />
- Whose side are you on?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.<br />
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, this is what you want<br />
to do with your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do it for all our lives.<br />
Nobody works harder than bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, I remember you<br />
coming home so overworked<br />
<br />
<br />
your hands were still stirring.<br />
You couldn't stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
I remember that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What right do they have to our honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
We live on two cups a year. They put it<br />
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!<br />
<br />
<br />
Even if it's true, what can one bee do?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sting them where it really hurts.<br />
<br />
<br />
In the face! The eye!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That would hurt.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Up the nose? That's a killer.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's only one place you can sting<br />
the humans, one place where it matters.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hive at Five, the hive's only<br />
full-hour action news source.<br />
<br />
<br />
No more bee beards!<br />
<br />
<br />
With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Weather with Storm Stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sports with Buzz Larvi.<br />
<br />
<br />
And Jeanette Ohung.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.<br />
- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,<br />
<br />
<br />
intends to sue the human race<br />
for stealing our honey,<br />
<br />
<br />
packaging it and profiting<br />
from it illegally!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,<br />
<br />
<br />
we'll have three former queens here in<br />
our studio, discussing their new book,<br />
<br />
<br />
Olassy Ladies,<br />
out this week on Hexagon.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
Did you ever think, "I'm a kid<br />
from the hive. I can't do this"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have never been afraid<br />
to change the world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What about Bee Oolumbus?<br />
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?<br />
<br />
<br />
Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
We were thinking<br />
of stickball or candy stores.<br />
<br />
<br />
How old are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee community<br />
is supporting you in this case,<br />
<br />
<br />
which will be the trial<br />
of the bee century.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, they have a Larry King<br />
in the human world too.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a common name. Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
He looks like you and has a show<br />
and suspenders and colored dots...<br />
<br />
<br />
Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the<br />
guest even though you just heard 'em.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bear Week next week!<br />
They're scary, hairy and here live.<br />
<br />
<br />
Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,<br />
squinty eyes, very Jewish.<br />
<br />
<br />
In tennis, you attack<br />
at the point of weakness!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey, her backhand's a joke!<br />
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Quiet, please.<br />
Actual work going on here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that that same bee?<br />
- Yes, it is!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm helping him sue the human race.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hello.<br />
- Hello, bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size<br />
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does he talk again?<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, you better go<br />
'cause we're really busy working.<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's our yogurt night!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye-bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why is yogurt night so difficult?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You poor thing.<br />
You two have been at this for hours!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, and Adam here<br />
has been a huge help.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Frosting...<br />
- How many sugars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Just one. I try not<br />
to use the competition.<br />
<br />
<br />
So why are you helping me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have good qualities.<br />
<br />
<br />
And it takes my mind off the shop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Instead of flowers, people<br />
are giving balloon bouquets now.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those are great, if you're three.<br />
<br />
<br />
And artificial flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, those just get me psychotic!<br />
- Yeah, me too.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bent stingers, pointless pollination.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees must hate those fake things!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nothing worse<br />
than a daffodil that's had work done.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this could make up<br />
for it a little bit.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.<br />
- I guess.<br />
<br />
<br />
You sure you want to go through with it?<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I sure? When I'm done with<br />
the humans, they won't be able<br />
<br />
<br />
to say, "Honey, I'm home,"<br />
without paying a royalty!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's an incredible scene<br />
here in downtown Manhattan,<br />
<br />
<br />
where the world anxiously waits,<br />
because for the first time in history,<br />
<br />
<br />
we will hear for ourselves<br />
if a honeybee can actually speak.<br />
<br />
<br />
What have we gotten into here, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's pretty big, isn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe how many humans<br />
don't work during the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think billion-dollar multinational<br />
food companies have good lawyers?<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody needs to stay<br />
behind the barricade.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's the matter?<br />
- I don't know, I just got a chill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, if it isn't the bee team.<br />
<br />
<br />
You boys work on this?<br />
<br />
<br />
All rise! The Honorable<br />
Judge Bumbleton presiding.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Oase number 4475,<br />
<br />
<br />
Superior Oourt of New York,<br />
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry<br />
<br />
<br />
is now in session.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery, you're representing<br />
the five food companies collectively?<br />
<br />
<br />
A privilege.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson... you're representing<br />
all the bees of the world?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,<br />
we're ready to proceed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery,<br />
your opening statement, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,<br />
<br />
<br />
my grandmother was a simple woman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Born on a farm, she believed<br />
it was man's divine right<br />
<br />
<br />
to benefit from the bounty<br />
of nature God put before us.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we lived in the topsy-turvy world<br />
Mr. Benson imagines,<br />
<br />
<br />
just think of what would it mean.<br />
<br />
<br />
I would have to negotiate<br />
with the silkworm<br />
<br />
<br />
for the elastic in my britches!<br />
<br />
<br />
Talking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we know this isn't some sort of<br />
<br />
<br />
holographic motion-picture-capture<br />
Hollywood wizardry?<br />
<br />
<br />
They could be using laser beams!<br />
<br />
<br />
Robotics! Ventriloquism!<br />
Oloning! For all we know,<br />
<br />
<br />
he could be on steroids!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen,<br />
there's no trickery here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just an ordinary bee.<br />
Honey's pretty important to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's important to all bees.<br />
We invented it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We make it. And we protect it<br />
with our lives.<br />
<br />
<br />
Unfortunately, there are<br />
some people in this room<br />
<br />
<br />
who think they can take it from us<br />
<br />
<br />
'cause we're the little guys!<br />
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,<br />
<br />
<br />
you'll see how, by taking our honey,<br />
you not only take everything we have<br />
<br />
<br />
but everything we are!<br />
<br />
<br />
I wish he'd dress like that<br />
all the time. So nice!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oall your first witness.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden<br />
of Honey Farms, big company you have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I suppose so.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see you also own<br />
Honeyburton and Honron!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, they provide beekeepers<br />
for our farms.<br />
<br />
<br />
Beekeeper. I find that<br />
to be a very disturbing term.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't imagine you employ<br />
any bee-free-ers, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- I couldn't hear you.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Because you don't free bees.<br />
You keep bees. Not only that,<br />
<br />
<br />
it seems you thought a bear would be<br />
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're very lovable creatures.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.<br />
<br />
<br />
You mean like this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bears kill bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
How'd you like his head crashing<br />
through your living room?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Biting into your couch!<br />
Spitting out your throw pillows!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, that's enough. Take him away.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.<br />
Your name intrigues me.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where have I heard it before?<br />
- I was with a band called The Police.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you've never been<br />
a police officer, have you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I haven't.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, you haven't. And so here<br />
we have yet another example<br />
<br />
<br />
of bee culture casually<br />
stolen by a human<br />
<br />
<br />
for nothing more than<br />
a prance-about stage name.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?<br />
<br />
<br />
Because I'm feeling<br />
a little stung, Sting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's not his real name?! You idiots!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Liotta, first,<br />
belated congratulations on<br />
<br />
<br />
your Emmy win for a guest spot<br />
on ER in 2005.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. Thank you.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see from your resume<br />
that you're devilishly handsome<br />
<br />
<br />
with a churning inner turmoil<br />
that's ready to blow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?<br />
<br />
<br />
Not yet it isn't. But is this<br />
what it's come to for you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Exploiting tiny, helpless bees<br />
so you don't<br />
<br />
<br />
have to rehearse<br />
your part and learn your lines, sir?<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch it, Benson!<br />
I could blow right now!<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't a goodfella.<br />
This is a badfella!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why doesn't someone just step on<br />
this creep, and we can all go home?!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Order in this court!<br />
- You're all thinking it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order, I say!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Say it!<br />
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think it was awfully nice<br />
of that bear to pitch in like that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I think the jury's on our side.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we doing everything right, legally?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Well, here's to a great team.<br />
<br />
<br />
To a great team!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ken!<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think you were coming.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I was just late.<br />
I tried to call, but... the battery.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't want all this to go to waste,<br />
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that was lucky.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a little left.<br />
I could heat it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not much for the game myself.<br />
The ball's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's where I usually sit.<br />
Right... there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,<br />
<br />
<br />
and he agreed with me that eating with<br />
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think I don't see what you're doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how hard it is to find<br />
the rightjob. We have that in common.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do we?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have 100 percent employment,<br />
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's just what<br />
I was thinking about doing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor<br />
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to drain the old stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, you do that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at that.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I've just about had it<br />
<br />
<br />
with your little mind games.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's that?<br />
- Italian Vogue.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.<br />
<br />
<br />
A lot of ads.<br />
<br />
<br />
Remember what Van said, why is<br />
your life more valuable than mine?<br />
<br />
<br />
Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think something stinks in here!<br />
<br />
<br />
I love the smell of flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
How do you like the smell of flames?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Not as much.<br />
<br />
<br />
Water bug! Not taking sides!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!<br />
This is pathetic!<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got issues!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, well, well, a royal flush!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're bluffing.<br />
- Am I?<br />
<br />
<br />
Surf's up, dude!<br />
<br />
<br />
Poo water!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bowl is gnarly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Except for those dirty yellow rings!<br />
<br />
<br />
Kenneth! What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I don't even like honey!<br />
I don't eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We need to talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's just a little bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
And he happens to be<br />
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!<br />
<br />
<br />
Long time? What are you talking about?!<br />
Are there other bugs in your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, but there are other things bugging<br />
me in life. And you're one of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...<br />
<br />
<br />
My nerves are fried from riding<br />
on this emotional roller coaster!<br />
<br />
<br />
Goodbye, Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
And for your information,<br />
<br />
<br />
I prefer sugar-free, artificial<br />
sweeteners made by man!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry about all that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's got<br />
an aftertaste! I like it!<br />
<br />
<br />
I always felt there was some kind<br />
of barrier between Ken and me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I couldn't overcome it.<br />
Oh, well.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you OK for the trial?<br />
<br />
<br />
I believe Mr. Montgomery<br />
is about out of ideas.<br />
<br />
<br />
We would like to call<br />
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good idea! You can really see why he's<br />
considered one of the best lawyers...<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Layton, you've<br />
gotta weave some magic<br />
<br />
<br />
with this jury,<br />
or it's gonna be all over.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't worry. The only thing I have<br />
to do to turn this jury around<br />
<br />
<br />
is to remind them<br />
of what they don't like about bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got the tweezers?<br />
- Are you allergic?<br />
<br />
<br />
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you<br />
what I think we'd all like to know.<br />
<br />
<br />
What exactly is your relationship<br />
<br />
<br />
to that woman?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good friends?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How good? Do you live together?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute...<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you her little...<br />
<br />
<br />
...bedbug?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've seen a bee documentary or two.<br />
From what I understand,<br />
<br />
<br />
doesn't your queen give birth<br />
to all the bee children?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yeah, but...<br />
- So those aren't your real parents!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, Barry...<br />
- Yes, they are!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold me back!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're an illegitimate bee,<br />
aren't you, Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's denouncing bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't y'all date your cousins?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Objection!<br />
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, don't! It's what he wants!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I'm hit!!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, lordy, I am hit!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
The venom! The venom<br />
is coursing through my veins!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have been felled<br />
by a winged beast of destruction!<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? You can't treat them<br />
like equals! They're striped savages!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stinging's the only thing<br />
they know! It's their way!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Adam, stay with me.<br />
- I can't feel my legs.<br />
<br />
<br />
What angel of mercy<br />
will come forward to suck the poison<br />
<br />
<br />
from my heaving buttocks?<br />
<br />
<br />
I will have order in this court. Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order, please!<br />
<br />
<br />
The case of the honeybees<br />
versus the human race<br />
<br />
<br />
took a pointed turn against the bees<br />
<br />
<br />
yesterday when one of their legal<br />
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, buddy.<br />
- Hey.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is there much pain?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I...<br />
<br />
<br />
I blew the whole case, didn't I?<br />
<br />
<br />
It doesn't matter. What matters is<br />
you're alive. You could have died.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd be better off dead. Look at me.<br />
<br />
<br />
They got it from the cafeteria<br />
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look, there's<br />
a little celery still on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was it like to sting someone?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't explain it. It was all...<br />
<br />
<br />
All adrenaline and then...<br />
and then ecstasy!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think it was all a trap?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. I'm sorry.<br />
I flew us right into this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were we thinking? Look at us. We're<br />
just a couple of bugs in this world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What will the humans do to us<br />
if they win?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I hear they put the roaches in motels.<br />
That doesn't sound so bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, they check in,<br />
but they don't check out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oould you get a nurse<br />
to close that window?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why?<br />
- The smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke!<br />
But some bees are smoking.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's it! That's our case!<br />
<br />
<br />
It is? It's not over?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
Get back to the court and stall.<br />
Stall any way you can.<br />
<br />
<br />
And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes? Yes, Your Honor!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the rest of your team?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as a result,<br />
we don't make very good time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I actually heard a funny story about...<br />
<br />
<br />
Your Honor,<br />
haven't these ridiculous bugs<br />
<br />
<br />
taken up enough<br />
of this court's valuable time?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will we allow<br />
these absurd shenanigans to go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
They have presented no compelling<br />
evidence to support their charges<br />
<br />
<br />
against my clients,<br />
who run legitimate businesses.<br />
<br />
<br />
I move for a complete dismissal<br />
of this entire case!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going<br />
<br />
<br />
to have to consider<br />
Mr. Montgomery's motion.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you can't! We have a terrific case.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is your proof?<br />
Where is the evidence?<br />
<br />
<br />
Show me the smoking gun!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, Your Honor!<br />
You want a smoking gun?<br />
<br />
<br />
Here is your smoking gun.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is that?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee smoker!<br />
<br />
<br />
What, this?<br />
This harmless little contraption?<br />
<br />
<br />
This couldn't hurt a fly,<br />
let alone a bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at what has happened<br />
<br />
<br />
to bees who have never been asked,<br />
"Smoking or non?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is this what nature intended for us?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be forcibly addicted<br />
to smoke machines<br />
<br />
<br />
and man-made wooden slat work camps?<br />
<br />
<br />
Living out our lives as honey slaves<br />
to the white man?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What are we gonna do?<br />
- He's playing the species card.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen, please,<br />
free these bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
The court finds in favor of the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, we won!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew you could do it! High-five!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm OK! You know what this means?<br />
<br />
<br />
All the honey<br />
will finally belong to the bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Now we won't have<br />
to work so hard all the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is an unholy perversion<br />
of the balance of nature, Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll regret this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, how much honey is out there?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. One at a time.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, who are you wearing?<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweater is Ralph Lauren,<br />
and I have no pants.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if Montgomery's right?<br />
- What do you mean?<br />
<br />
<br />
We've been living the bee way<br />
a long time, 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oongratulations on your victory.<br />
What will you demand as a settlement?<br />
<br />
<br />
First, we'll demand a complete shutdown<br />
of all bee work camps.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then we want back the honey<br />
that was ours to begin with,<br />
<br />
<br />
every last drop.<br />
<br />
<br />
We demand an end to the glorification<br />
of the bear as anything more<br />
<br />
<br />
than a filthy, smelly,<br />
bad-breath stink machine.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're all aware<br />
of what they do in the woods.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait for my signal.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
He'll have nauseous<br />
for a few hours, then he'll be fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
And we will no longer tolerate<br />
bee-negative nicknames...<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's just a prance-about stage name!<br />
<br />
<br />
...unnecessary inclusion of honey<br />
in bogus health products<br />
<br />
<br />
and la-dee-da human<br />
tea-time snack garnishments.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't breathe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it in, boys!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it right there! Good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tap it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,<br />
and there's gallons more coming!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I think we need to shut down!<br />
- Shut down? We've never shut down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shut down honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop making honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn your key, sir!<br />
<br />
<br />
What do we do now?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oannonball!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're shutting honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mission abort.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aborting pollination and nectar detail.<br />
Returning to base.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, you wouldn't believe<br />
how much honey was out there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah?<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Where is everybody?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Are they out celebrating?<br />
- They're home.<br />
<br />
<br />
They don't know what to do.<br />
Laying out, sleeping in.<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way<br />
to San Antonio with a cricket.<br />
<br />
<br />
At least we got our honey back.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I think, so what if humans<br />
liked our honey? Who wouldn't?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the greatest thing in the world!<br />
I was excited to be part of making it.<br />
<br />
<br />
This was my new desk. This was my<br />
new job. I wanted to do it really well.<br />
<br />
<br />
And now...<br />
<br />
<br />
Now I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand<br />
why they're not happy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought their lives would be better!<br />
<br />
<br />
They're doing nothing. It's amazing.<br />
Honey really changes people.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have any idea<br />
what's going on, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What did you want to show me?<br />
- This.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
That is not the half of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're all wilting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Doesn't look very good, does it?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
And whose fault do you think that is?<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I'm gonna guess bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees?<br />
<br />
<br />
Specifically, me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think bees not needing to make<br />
honey would affect all these things.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's notjust flowers.<br />
Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our whole SAT test right there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take away produce, that affects<br />
the entire animal kingdom.<br />
<br />
<br />
And then, of course...<br />
<br />
<br />
The human species?<br />
<br />
<br />
So if there's no more pollination,<br />
<br />
<br />
it could all just go south here,<br />
couldn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know this is also partly my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about a suicide pact?<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we do it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'll sting you, you step on me.<br />
- Thatjust kills you twice.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, Barry...<br />
sorry, but I gotta get going.<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to open my mouth and talk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa?<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa? Why are you leaving?<br />
Where are you going?<br />
<br />
<br />
To the final Tournament of Roses parade<br />
in Pasadena.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've moved it to this weekend<br />
because all the flowers are dying.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the last chance<br />
I'll ever have to see it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.<br />
I never meant it to turn out like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Me neither.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses.<br />
Roses can't do sports.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Roses are flowers!<br />
- Yes, they are.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers, bees, pollen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I know.<br />
That's why this is the last parade.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe not.<br />
Oould you ask him to slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oould you slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, I made a huge mistake.<br />
This is a total disaster, all my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, it kind of is.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've ruined the planet.<br />
I wanted to help you<br />
<br />
<br />
with the flower shop.<br />
I've made it worse.<br />
<br />
<br />
Actually, it's completely closed down.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought maybe you were remodeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I have another idea, and it's<br />
greater than my previous ideas combined.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to hear it!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, they have the roses,<br />
the roses have the pollen.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know every bee, plant<br />
and flower bud in this park.<br />
<br />
<br />
All we gotta do is get what they've got<br />
back here with what we've got.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees.<br />
- Park.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Pollen!<br />
- Flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Repollination!<br />
- Across the nation!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses,<br />
Pasadena, Oalifornia.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've got nothing<br />
but flowers, floats and cotton candy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Security will be tight.<br />
<br />
<br />
I have an idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa Bloome, FTD.<br />
<br />
<br />
Official floral business. It's real.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. It was a gift.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once inside,<br />
we just pick the right float.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about The Princess and the Pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could be the princess,<br />
and you could be the pea!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, I got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where should I sit?<br />
- What are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I believe I'm the pea.<br />
- The pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
It goes under the mattresses.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.<br />
- I'm getting the marshal.<br />
<br />
<br />
You do that!<br />
This whole parade is a fiasco!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's see what this baby'll do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, what are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then all we do<br />
is blend in with traffic...<br />
<br />
<br />
...without arousing suspicion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once at the airport,<br />
there's no stopping us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop! Security.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You and your insect pack your float?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Has it been<br />
in your possession the entire time?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you remove your shoes?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Remove your stinger.<br />
- It's part of me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Just having some fun.<br />
Enjoy your flight.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then if we're lucky, we'll have<br />
just enough pollen to do the job.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan you believe how lucky we are? We<br />
have just enough pollen to do the job!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think this is gonna work.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got to work.<br />
<br />
<br />
Attention, passengers,<br />
this is Oaptain Scott.<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a bit of bad weather<br />
in New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
It looks like we'll experience<br />
a couple hours delay.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, these are cut flowers<br />
with no water. They'll never make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get up there<br />
and talk to them.<br />
<br />
<br />
Be careful.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I get help<br />
with the Sky Mall magazine?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd like to order the talking<br />
inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you say, Hal?<br />
- Nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't freak out! My entire species...<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!<br />
- Who's an attorney?<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good afternoon, passengers.<br />
This is your captain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B<br />
please report to the cockpit?<br />
<br />
<br />
And please hurry!<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
There was a DustBuster,<br />
a toupee, a life raft exploded.<br />
<br />
<br />
One's bald, one's in a boat,<br />
they're both unconscious!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that another bee joke?<br />
- No!<br />
<br />
<br />
No one's flying the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.<br />
What's your status?<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Vanessa Bloome.<br />
I'm a florist from New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where's the pilot?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's unconscious,<br />
and so is the copilot.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not good. Does anyone onboard<br />
have flight experience?<br />
<br />
<br />
As a matter of fact, there is.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Who's that?<br />
- Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
From the honey trial?! Oh, great.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, this is nothing more<br />
than a big metal bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got giant wings, huge engines.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How hard could it be?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, Barry!<br />
We're headed into some lightning.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Bob Bumble. We have some<br />
late-breaking news from JFK Airport,<br />
<br />
<br />
where a suspenseful scene<br />
is developing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry Benson,<br />
fresh from his legal victory...<br />
<br />
<br />
That's Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
...is attempting to land a plane,<br />
loaded with people, flowers<br />
<br />
<br />
and an incapacitated flight crew.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers?!<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a storm in the area<br />
and two individuals at the controls<br />
<br />
<br />
with absolutely no flight experience.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a minute.<br />
There's a bee on that plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson<br />
and his no-account compadres.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've done enough damage.<br />
<br />
<br />
But isn't he your only hope?<br />
<br />
<br />
Technically, a bee<br />
shouldn't be able to fly at all.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their wings are too small...<br />
<br />
<br />
Haven't we heard this a million times?<br />
<br />
<br />
"The surface area of the wings<br />
and body mass make no sense."<br />
<br />
<br />
- Get this on the air!<br />
- Got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Stand by.<br />
- We're going live.<br />
<br />
<br />
The way we work may be a mystery to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Making honey takes a lot of bees<br />
doing a lot of small jobs.<br />
<br />
<br />
But let me tell you about a small job.<br />
<br />
<br />
If you do it well,<br />
it makes a big difference.<br />
<br />
<br />
More than we realized.<br />
To us, to everyone.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why I want to get bees<br />
back to working together.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the bee way!<br />
We're not made of Jell-O.<br />
<br />
<br />
We get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow!<br />
- Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
Left, right, down, hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hover?<br />
- Forget hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't so hard.<br />
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, what happened?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, I think we were<br />
on autopilot the whole time.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That may have been helping me.<br />
- And now we're not!<br />
<br />
<br />
So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, let's get<br />
behind this fellow! Move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Move out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,<br />
you copy me with the wings of the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't have to yell.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not yelling!<br />
We're in a lot of trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's very hard to concentrate<br />
with that panicky tone in your voice!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's not a tone. I'm panicking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't do this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, pull yourself together.<br />
You have to snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hold it!<br />
- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
How is the plane flying?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Benson, got any flowers<br />
for a happy occasion in there?<br />
<br />
<br />
The Pollen Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
They do get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow.<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, let's drop this tin can<br />
on the blacktop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, nothing. It's all cloudy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute.<br />
I think I'm feeling something.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring the nose down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What in the world is on the tarmac?<br />
- Get some lights on that!<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, aim for the flower.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
Out the engines. We're going in<br />
on bee power. Ready, boys?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative!<br />
<br />
<br />
Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Land on that flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ready? Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spin it around!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not that flower! The other one!<br />
- Which one?<br />
<br />
<br />
- That flower.<br />
- I'm aiming at the flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.<br />
I mean the giant pulsating flower<br />
<br />
<br />
made of millions of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Rotate around it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This is insane, Barry!<br />
- This's the only way I know how to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane<br />
flying in an insect-like pattern?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.<br />
Smell it. Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just drop it. Be a part of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aim for the center!<br />
<br />
<br />
Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on, already.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, we did it!<br />
You taught me how to fly!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yes. No high-five!<br />
- Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, it worked!<br />
Did you see the giant flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
What giant flower? Where? Of course<br />
I saw the flower! That was genius!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- But we're not done yet.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, everyone!<br />
<br />
<br />
This runway is covered<br />
with the last pollen<br />
<br />
<br />
from the last flowers<br />
available anywhere on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
That means this is our last chance.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the only ones who make honey,<br />
pollinate flowers and dress like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we're gonna survive as a species,<br />
this is our moment! What do you say?<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we going to be bees, orjust<br />
Museum of Natural History keychains?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Keychain!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then follow me! Except Keychain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold on, Barry. Here.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've earned this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect<br />
fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mom! The bees are back!<br />
<br />
<br />
If anybody needs<br />
to make a call, now's the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I got a feeling we'll be<br />
working late tonight!<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's your change. Have a great<br />
afternoon! Oan I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you like some honey with that?<br />
It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.<br />
<br />
<br />
Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.<br />
And I don't see a nickel!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I just feel<br />
like a piece of meat!<br />
<br />
<br />
I had no idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm sorry.<br />
Have you got a moment?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you excuse me?<br />
My mosquito associate will help you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I'm late.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's a lawyer too?<br />
<br />
<br />
I was already a blood-sucking parasite.<br />
All I needed was a briefcase.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have a great afternoon!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,<br />
and I can't get them anywhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
No problem, Vannie.<br />
Just leave it to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're a lifesaver, Barry.<br />
Oan I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, scramble, jocks!<br />
It's time to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you, Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bee is living my life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let it go, Kenny.<br />
<br />
<br />
- When will this nightmare end?!<br />
- Let it all go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Beautiful day to fly.<br />
- Sure is.<br />
<br />
<br />
Between you and me,<br />
I was dying to get out of that office.<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got<br />
to start thinking bee, my friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee!<br />
- Me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it. Let's just stop<br />
for a second. Hold it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.<br />
Oan we stop here?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not making a major life decision<br />
during a production number!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Take ten, everybody.<br />
Wrap it up, guys.<br />
<br />
<br />
I had virtually no rehearsal for that."<br />
</nowiki><br />
Nika is a lifelong pupper<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Murphy $3<br />
Chaired by Jerry Seinfeld<br />
REAL RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
We have an event. Help us find it<br />
PHA18* 7PM Friday<br />
Fill out the food survey<br />
Play Zombies! zombies.cmukgb.org<br />
Pay Joe<br />
CTFWS is November 11th<br />
SHMUCKS<br />
fuck all of you<br />
Go thrift shopping with Dylan for zombies<br />
Go to Pamela's with Espy on Sundays!<br />
Come to music with us<br />
Get food<br />
GTFO</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=The_Bee_Movie&diff=8059The Bee Movie2016-09-26T21:35:38Z<p>Sonia: Created page with " According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee,..."</p>
<hr />
<div> <br />
According to all known laws<br />
of aviation,<br />
<br />
<br />
there is no way a bee<br />
should be able to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Its wings are too small to get<br />
its fat little body off the ground.<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee, of course, flies anyway<br />
<br />
<br />
because bees don't care<br />
what humans think is impossible.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooh, black and yellow!<br />
Let's shake it up a little.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry! Breakfast is ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooming!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hang on a second.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry?<br />
- Adam?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oan you believe this is happening?<br />
- I can't. I'll pick you up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Looking sharp.<br />
<br />
<br />
Use the stairs. Your father<br />
paid good money for those.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry. I'm excited.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's the graduate.<br />
We're very proud of you, son.<br />
<br />
<br />
A perfect report card, all B's.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ma! I got a thing going here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got lint on your fuzz.<br />
- Ow! That's me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.<br />
- Bye!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I told you,<br />
stop flying in the house!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Adam.<br />
- Hey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that fuzz gel?<br />
- A little. Special day, graduation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Never thought I'd make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days grade school,<br />
three days high school.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those were awkward.<br />
<br />
<br />
Three days college. I'm glad I took<br />
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did come back different.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, Barry.<br />
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hear about Frankie?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You going to the funeral?<br />
- No, I'm not going.<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody knows,<br />
sting someone, you die.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't waste it on a squirrel.<br />
Such a hothead.<br />
<br />
<br />
I guess he could have<br />
just gotten out of the way.<br />
<br />
<br />
I love this incorporating<br />
an amusement park into our day.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why we don't need vacations.<br />
<br />
<br />
Boy, quite a bit of pomp...<br />
under the circumstances.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, Adam, today we are men.<br />
- We are!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee-men.<br />
- Amen!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hallelujah!<br />
<br />
<br />
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,<br />
<br />
<br />
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome, New Hive Oity<br />
graduating class of...<br />
<br />
<br />
...9:15.<br />
<br />
<br />
That concludes our ceremonies.<br />
<br />
<br />
And begins your career<br />
at Honex Industries!<br />
<br />
<br />
Will we pick ourjob today?<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard it's just orientation.<br />
<br />
<br />
Heads up! Here we go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Keep your hands and antennas<br />
inside the tram at all times.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wonder what it'll be like?<br />
- A little scary.<br />
<br />
<br />
Welcome to Honex,<br />
a division of Honesco<br />
<br />
<br />
and a part of the Hexagon Group.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
We know that you, as a bee,<br />
have worked your whole life<br />
<br />
<br />
to get to the point where you<br />
can work for your whole life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen<br />
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our top-secret formula<br />
<br />
<br />
is automatically color-corrected,<br />
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured<br />
<br />
<br />
into this soothing sweet syrup<br />
<br />
<br />
with its distinctive<br />
golden glow you know as...<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That girl was hot.<br />
- She's my cousin!<br />
<br />
<br />
- She is?<br />
- Yes, we're all cousins.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Right. You're right.<br />
- At Honex, we constantly strive<br />
<br />
<br />
to improve every aspect<br />
of bee existence.<br />
<br />
<br />
These bees are stress-testing<br />
a new helmet technology.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What do you think he makes?<br />
- Not enough.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here we have our latest advancement,<br />
the Krelman.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What does that do?<br />
- Oatches that little strand of honey<br />
<br />
<br />
that hangs after you pour it.<br />
Saves us millions.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan anyone work on the Krelman?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. Most bee jobs are<br />
small ones. But bees know<br />
<br />
<br />
that every small job,<br />
if it's done well, means a lot.<br />
<br />
<br />
But choose carefully<br />
<br />
<br />
because you'll stay in the job<br />
you pick for the rest of your life.<br />
<br />
<br />
The same job the rest of your life?<br />
I didn't know that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's the difference?<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll be happy to know that bees,<br />
as a species, haven't had one day off<br />
<br />
<br />
in 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you'll just work us to death?<br />
<br />
<br />
We'll sure try.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! That blew my mind!<br />
<br />
<br />
"What's the difference?"<br />
How can you say that?<br />
<br />
<br />
One job forever?<br />
That's an insane choice to have to make.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm relieved. Now we only have<br />
to make one decision in life.<br />
<br />
<br />
But, Adam, how could they<br />
never have told us that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would you question anything?<br />
We're bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the most perfectly<br />
functioning society on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
You ever think maybe things<br />
work a little too well here?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like what? Give me one example.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. But you know<br />
what I'm talking about.<br />
<br />
<br />
Please clear the gate.<br />
Royal Nectar Force on approach.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a second. Oheck it out.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!<br />
- Wow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've never seen them this close.<br />
<br />
<br />
They know what it's like<br />
outside the hive.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, but some don't come back.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, Jocks!<br />
- Hi, Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
You guys did great!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're monsters!<br />
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I wonder where they were.<br />
- I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their day's not planned.<br />
<br />
<br />
Outside the hive, flying who knows<br />
where, doing who knows what.<br />
<br />
<br />
You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen<br />
Jock. You have to be bred for that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look. That's more pollen<br />
than you and I will see in a lifetime.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just a status symbol.<br />
Bees make too much of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it<br />
and the ladies see you wearing it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those ladies?<br />
Aren't they our cousins too?<br />
<br />
<br />
Distant. Distant.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at these two.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oouple of Hive Harrys.<br />
- Let's have fun with them.<br />
<br />
<br />
It must be dangerous<br />
being a Pollen Jock.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me<br />
against a mushroom!<br />
<br />
<br />
He had a paw on my throat,<br />
and with the other, he was slapping me!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, my!<br />
- I never thought I'd knock him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were you doing during this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Trying to alert the authorities.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can autograph that.<br />
<br />
<br />
A little gusty out there today,<br />
wasn't it, comrades?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Gusty.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're hitting a sunflower patch<br />
six miles from here tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Six miles, huh?<br />
- Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
A puddle jump for us,<br />
but maybe you're not up for it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Maybe I am.<br />
- You are not!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.<br />
<br />
<br />
What do you think, buzzy-boy?<br />
Are you bee enough?<br />
<br />
<br />
I might be. It all depends<br />
on what 0900 means.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Honex!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, you surprised me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You decide what you're interested in?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, there's a lot of choices.<br />
- But you only get one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you ever get bored<br />
doing the same job every day?<br />
<br />
<br />
Son, let me tell you about stirring.<br />
<br />
<br />
You grab that stick, and you just<br />
move it around, and you stir it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You get yourself into a rhythm.<br />
It's a beautiful thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, Dad,<br />
the more I think about it,<br />
<br />
<br />
maybe the honey field<br />
just isn't right for me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You were thinking of what,<br />
making balloon animals?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a bad job<br />
for a guy with a stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Janet, your son's not sure<br />
he wants to go into honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.<br />
- I'm not trying to be funny.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're not funny! You're going<br />
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're gonna be a stirrer?<br />
- No one's listening to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait till you see the sticks I have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could say anything right now.<br />
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's open some honey and celebrate!<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.<br />
Shave my antennae.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shack up with a grasshopper. Get<br />
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so proud.<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're starting work today!<br />
- Today's the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on! All the good jobs<br />
will be gone.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,<br />
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is it still available?<br />
- Hang on. Two left!<br />
<br />
<br />
One of them's yours! Oongratulations!<br />
Step to the side.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you get?<br />
- Picking crud out. Stellar!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oouple of newbies?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make your choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You want to go first?<br />
- No, you go.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my. What's available?<br />
<br />
<br />
Restroom attendant's open,<br />
not for the reason you think.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Any chance of getting the Krelman?<br />
- Sure, you're on.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wax monkey's always open.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Krelman opened up again.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee died. Makes an opening. See?<br />
He's dead. Another dead one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dead from the neck up.<br />
Dead from the neck down. That's life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, this is so hard!<br />
<br />
<br />
Heating, cooling,<br />
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,<br />
<br />
<br />
humming, inspector number seven,<br />
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,<br />
<br />
<br />
mite wrangler. Barry, what<br />
do you think I should... Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, we've got the sunflower patch<br />
in quadrant nine...<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened to you?<br />
Where are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm going out.<br />
- Out? Out where?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Out there.<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have to, before I go<br />
to work for the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Another call coming in.<br />
<br />
<br />
If anyone's feeling brave,<br />
there's a Korean deli on 83rd<br />
<br />
<br />
that gets their roses today.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, guys.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Look at that.<br />
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Really? Feeling lucky, are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sign here, here. Just initial that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got a rain advisory today,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as you all know,<br />
bees cannot fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
So be careful. As always,<br />
watch your brooms,<br />
<br />
<br />
hockey sticks, dogs,<br />
birds, bears and bats.<br />
<br />
<br />
Also, I got a couple of reports<br />
of root beer being poured on us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Murphy's in a home because of it,<br />
babbling like a cicada!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's awful.<br />
- And a reminder for you rookies,<br />
<br />
<br />
bee law number one,<br />
absolutely no talking to humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, launch positions!<br />
<br />
<br />
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,<br />
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!<br />
<br />
<br />
Black and yellow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
You ready for this, hot shot?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wind, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Antennae, check.<br />
- Nectar pack, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wings, check.<br />
- Stinger, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
Scared out of my shorts, check.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, ladies,<br />
<br />
<br />
let's move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pound those petunias,<br />
you striped stem-suckers!<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, drain those flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow! I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm out!<br />
<br />
<br />
So blue.<br />
<br />
<br />
I feel so fast and free!<br />
<br />
<br />
Box kite!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Blue Leader.<br />
We have roses visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand to the side, kid.<br />
It's got a bit of a kick.<br />
<br />
<br />
That is one nectar collector!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ever see pollination up close?<br />
- No, sir.<br />
<br />
<br />
I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it<br />
over here. Maybe a dash over there,<br />
<br />
<br />
a pinch on that one.<br />
See that? It's a little bit of magic.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's amazing. Why do we do that?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's pollen power. More pollen, more<br />
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oool.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.<br />
Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oopy that visual.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait. One of these flowers<br />
seems to be on the move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Say again? You're reporting<br />
a moving flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was on the line!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is the coolest. What is it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know, but I'm loving this color.<br />
<br />
<br />
It smells good.<br />
Not like a flower, but I like it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, fuzzy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ohemical-y.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweet lord of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oandy-brain, get off there!<br />
<br />
<br />
Problem!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Guys!<br />
- This could be bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very close.<br />
<br />
<br />
Gonna hurt.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mama's little boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
You are way out of position, rookie!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ooming in at you like a missile!<br />
<br />
<br />
Help me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't think these are flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Should we tell him?<br />
- I think he knows.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Match point!<br />
<br />
<br />
You can start packing up, honey,<br />
because you're about to eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yowser!<br />
<br />
<br />
Gross.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a bee in the car!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do something!<br />
- I'm driving!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hi, bee.<br />
- He's back here!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's going to sting me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody move. If you don't move,<br />
he won't sting you. Freeze!<br />
<br />
<br />
He blinked!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spray him, Granny!<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow... the tension level<br />
out here is unbelievable.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get home.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't fly in rain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, could you close<br />
the window please?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oheck out my new resume.<br />
I made it into a fold-out brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? Folds out.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this time. This time. This time.<br />
This time! This time! This...<br />
<br />
<br />
Drapes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That is diabolical.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's fantastic. It's got all my special<br />
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.<br />
<br />
<br />
What's number one? Star Wars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah, I don't go for that...<br />
<br />
<br />
...kind of stuff.<br />
<br />
<br />
No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.<br />
They're out of their minds.<br />
<br />
<br />
When I leave a job interview, they're<br />
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't remember the sun<br />
having a big 75 on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I predicted global warming.<br />
<br />
<br />
I could feel it getting hotter.<br />
At first I thought it was just me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait! Stop! Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stand back. These are winter boots.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't kill him!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know I'm allergic to them!<br />
This thing could kill me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have<br />
less value than yours?<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does his life have any less value<br />
than mine? Is that your statement?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just saying all life has value. You<br />
don't know what he's capable of feeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
My brochure!<br />
<br />
<br />
There you go, little guy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not scared of him.<br />
It's an allergic thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Put that on your resume brochure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My whole face could puff up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Make it one of your special skills.<br />
<br />
<br />
Knocking someone out<br />
is also a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?<br />
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You could put carob chips on there.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Supposed to be less calories.<br />
- Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life.<br />
I gotta say something.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, here it goes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nah.<br />
<br />
<br />
What would I say?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could really get in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee law.<br />
You're not supposed to talk to a human.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe I'm doing this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got to.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!<br />
<br />
<br />
No. Yes. No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do it. I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
How should I start it?<br />
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Here she comes! Speak, you fool!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hi!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're talking.<br />
- Yes, I know.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm so sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, it's OK. It's fine.<br />
I know I'm dreaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I don't recall going to bed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I'm sure this<br />
is very disconcerting.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is a bit of a surprise to me.<br />
I mean, you're a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
I am. And I'm not supposed<br />
to be doing this,<br />
<br />
<br />
but they were all trying to kill me.<br />
<br />
<br />
And if it wasn't for you...<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to thank you.<br />
It's just how I was raised.<br />
<br />
<br />
That was a little weird.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'm talking with a bee.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm talking to a bee.<br />
And the bee is talking to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
I just want to say I'm grateful.<br />
I'll leave now.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait! How did you learn to do that?<br />
- What?<br />
<br />
<br />
The talking thing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Same way you did, I guess.<br />
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That's very funny.<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,<br />
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I...<br />
<br />
<br />
...get you something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know. I mean...<br />
I don't know. Ooffee?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to put you out.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's just coffee.<br />
- I hate to impose.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Don't be ridiculous!<br />
- Actually, I would love a cup.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, you want rum cake?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I shouldn't.<br />
- Have some.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No, I can't.<br />
- Oome on!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where?<br />
- These stripes don't help.<br />
<br />
<br />
You look great!<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know if you know<br />
anything about fashion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you all right?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's making the tie in the cab<br />
as they're flying up Madison.<br />
<br />
<br />
He finally gets there.<br />
<br />
<br />
He runs up the steps into the church.<br />
The wedding is on.<br />
<br />
<br />
And he says, "Watermelon?<br />
I thought you said Guatemalan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why would I marry a watermelon?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is that a bee joke?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the kind of stuff we do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, different.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, what are you gonna do, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
About work? I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do my part for the hive,<br />
but I can't do it the way they want.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how you feel.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You do?<br />
- Sure.<br />
<br />
<br />
My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or<br />
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Really?<br />
- My only interest is flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our new queen was just elected<br />
with that same campaign slogan.<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, if you look...<br />
<br />
<br />
There's my hive right there. See it?<br />
<br />
<br />
You're in Sheep Meadow!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!<br />
<br />
<br />
No way! I know that area.<br />
I lost a toe ring there once.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why do girls put rings on their toes?<br />
- Why not?<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's like putting a hat on your knee.<br />
- Maybe I'll try that.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You all right, ma'am?<br />
- Oh, yeah. Fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just having two cups of coffee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Anyway, this has been great.<br />
Thanks for the coffee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it's no trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,<br />
I'd be up the rest of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you...?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I take a piece of this with me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sure! Here, have a crumb.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thanks!<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Well, then...<br />
I guess I'll see you around.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or not.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
And thank you<br />
so much again... for before.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that? That was nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...<br />
<br />
<br />
This can't possibly work.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's all set to go.<br />
We may as well try it.<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, Dave, pull the chute.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Sounds amazing.<br />
- It was amazing!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was the scariest,<br />
happiest moment of my life.<br />
<br />
<br />
Humans! I can't believe<br />
you were with humans!<br />
<br />
<br />
Giant, scary humans!<br />
What were they like?<br />
<br />
<br />
Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
They eat crazy giant things.<br />
They drive crazy.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?<br />
- Some of them. But some of them don't.<br />
<br />
<br />
- How'd you get back?<br />
- Poodle.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw<br />
whatever you wanted to see.<br />
<br />
<br />
You had your "experience." Now you<br />
can pick out yourjob and be normal.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well...<br />
- Well?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I met someone.<br />
<br />
<br />
You did? Was she Bee-ish?<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!<br />
- No, no, no, not a wasp.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Spider?<br />
- I'm not attracted to spiders.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's the hottest thing,<br />
with the eight legs and all.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't get by that face.<br />
<br />
<br />
So who is she?<br />
<br />
<br />
She's... human.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, no. That's a bee law.<br />
You wouldn't break a bee law.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Her name's Vanessa.<br />
- Oh, boy.<br />
<br />
<br />
She's so nice. And she's a florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're not dating.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're flying outside the hive, talking<br />
to humans that attack our homes<br />
<br />
<br />
with power washers and M-80s!<br />
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!<br />
<br />
<br />
She saved my life!<br />
And she understands me.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is over!<br />
<br />
<br />
Eat this.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is not over! What was that?<br />
<br />
<br />
- They call it a crumb.<br />
- It was so stingin' stripey!<br />
<br />
<br />
And that's not what they eat.<br />
That's what falls off what they eat!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You know what a Oinnabon is?<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.<br />
They heat it up...<br />
<br />
<br />
Sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
...really hot!<br />
- Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
We are not them! We're us.<br />
There's us and there's them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, but who can deny<br />
the heart that is yearning?<br />
<br />
<br />
There's no yearning.<br />
Stop yearning. Listen to me!<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got to start thinking bee,<br />
my friend. Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
There he is. He's in the pool.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know what your problem is, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta start thinking bee?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will this go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's been three days!<br />
Why aren't you working?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got a lot of big life decisions<br />
to think about.<br />
<br />
<br />
What life? You have no life!<br />
You have no job. You're barely a bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Would it kill you<br />
to make a little honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, come out.<br />
Your father's talking to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Martin, would you talk to him?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm talking to you!<br />
<br />
<br />
You coming?<br />
<br />
<br />
Got everything?<br />
<br />
<br />
All set!<br />
<br />
<br />
Go ahead. I'll catch up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't be too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
- We're still here.<br />
- I told you not to yell at him.<br />
<br />
<br />
He doesn't respond to yelling!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Then why yell at me?<br />
- Because you don't listen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not listening to this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, I've gotta go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where are you going?<br />
- I'm meeting a friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
A girl? Is this why you can't decide?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
I just hope she's Bee-ish.<br />
<br />
<br />
They have a huge parade<br />
of flowers every year in Pasadena?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be in the Tournament of Roses,<br />
that's every florist's dream!<br />
<br />
<br />
Up on a float, surrounded<br />
by flowers, crowds cheering.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tournament. Do the roses<br />
compete in athletic events?<br />
<br />
<br />
No. All right, I've got one.<br />
How come you don't fly everywhere?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's exhausting. Why don't you<br />
run everywhere? It's faster.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, OK, I see, I see.<br />
All right, your turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?<br />
That's insane!<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have that?<br />
<br />
<br />
We have Hivo, but it's a disease.<br />
It's a horrible, horrible disease.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Dumb bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You must want to sting all those jerks.<br />
<br />
<br />
We try not to sting.<br />
It's usually fatal for us.<br />
<br />
<br />
So you have to watch your temper.<br />
<br />
<br />
Very carefully.<br />
You kick a wall, take a walk,<br />
<br />
<br />
write an angry letter and throw it out.<br />
Work through it like any emotion:<br />
<br />
<br />
Anger, jealousy, lust.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is wrong with you?!<br />
- It's a bug.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's not bothering anybody.<br />
Get out of here, you creep!<br />
<br />
<br />
What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, it was. How did you know?<br />
<br />
<br />
It felt like about 10 pages.<br />
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've really got that<br />
down to a science.<br />
<br />
<br />
- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.<br />
- I'll bet.<br />
<br />
<br />
What in the name<br />
of Mighty Hercules is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
How did this get here?<br />
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,<br />
<br />
<br />
Ray Liotta Private Select?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is he that actor?<br />
- I never heard of him.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why is this here?<br />
- For people. We eat it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have<br />
enough food of your own?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Well, yes.<br />
- How do you get it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees make it.<br />
- I know who makes it!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's hard to make it!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's heating, cooling, stirring.<br />
You need a whole Krelman thing!<br />
<br />
<br />
- It's organic.<br />
- It's our-ganic!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's just honey, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just what?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't know about this!<br />
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!<br />
<br />
<br />
You've taken our homes, schools,<br />
hospitals! This is all we have!<br />
<br />
<br />
And it's on sale?!<br />
I'm getting to the bottom of this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm getting to the bottom<br />
of all of this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Hector.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You almost done?<br />
- Almost.<br />
<br />
<br />
He is here. I sense it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, I guess I'll go home now<br />
<br />
<br />
and just leave this nice honey out,<br />
with no one around.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're busted, box boy!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I heard something.<br />
So you can talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can talk.<br />
And now you'll start talking!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where you getting the sweet stuff?<br />
Who's your supplier?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand.<br />
I thought we were friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
The last thing we want<br />
to do is upset bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're too late! It's ours now!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, have crossed<br />
the wrong sword!<br />
<br />
<br />
You, sir, will be lunch<br />
for my iguana, Ignacio!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the honey coming from?<br />
<br />
<br />
Tell me where!<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!<br />
<br />
<br />
Orazy person!<br />
<br />
<br />
What horrible thing has happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
These faces, they never knew<br />
what hit them. And now<br />
<br />
<br />
they're on the road to nowhere!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just keep still.<br />
<br />
<br />
What? You're not dead?<br />
<br />
<br />
Do I look dead? They will wipe anything<br />
that moves. Where you headed?<br />
<br />
<br />
To Honey Farms.<br />
I am onto something huge here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,<br />
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to Tacoma.<br />
<br />
<br />
- And you?<br />
- He really is dead.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Uh-oh!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What is that?!<br />
- Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
- A wiper! Triple blade!<br />
- Triple blade?<br />
<br />
<br />
Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does everything have<br />
to be so doggone clean?!<br />
<br />
<br />
How much do you people need to see?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Open your eyes!<br />
Stick your head out the window!<br />
<br />
<br />
From NPR News in Washington,<br />
I'm Oarl Kasell.<br />
<br />
<br />
But don't kill no more bugs!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bee!<br />
- Moose blood guy!!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You hear something?<br />
- Like what?<br />
<br />
<br />
Like tiny screaming.<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn off the radio.<br />
<br />
<br />
Whassup, bee boy?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, Blood.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a row of honey jars,<br />
as far as the eye could see.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wow!<br />
<br />
<br />
I assume wherever this truck goes<br />
is where they're getting it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I mean, that honey's ours.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees hang tight.<br />
- We're all jammed in.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a close community.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not us, man. We on our own.<br />
Every mosquito on his own.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if you get in trouble?<br />
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
Nobody likes us. They just smack.<br />
See a mosquito, smack, smack!<br />
<br />
<br />
At least you're out in the world.<br />
You must meet girls.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girls try to trade up,<br />
get with a moth, dragonfly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.<br />
<br />
<br />
You got to be kidding me!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mooseblood's about to leave<br />
the building! So long, bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, guys!<br />
- Mooseblood!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew I'd catch y'all down here.<br />
Did you bring your crazy straw?<br />
<br />
<br />
We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,<br />
and it's pretty much pure profit.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this place?<br />
<br />
<br />
A bee's got a brain<br />
the size of a pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
They are pinheads!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pinhead.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oheck out the new smoker.<br />
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.<br />
<br />
<br />
The Thomas 3000!<br />
<br />
<br />
Smoker?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.<br />
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.<br />
<br />
<br />
A couple breaths of this<br />
knocks them right out.<br />
<br />
<br />
They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money.<br />
<br />
<br />
"They make the honey,<br />
and we make the money"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my!<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Are you OK?<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah. It doesn't last too long.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do you know you're<br />
in a fake hive with fake walls?<br />
<br />
<br />
Our queen was moved here.<br />
We had no choice.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is your queen?<br />
That's a man in women's clothes!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a drag queen!<br />
<br />
<br />
What is this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no!<br />
<br />
<br />
There's hundreds of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our honey is being brazenly stolen<br />
on a massive scale!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is worse than anything bears<br />
have done! I intend to do something.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry, stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Who told you humans are taking<br />
our honey? That's a rumor.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do these look like rumors?<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a conspiracy theory.<br />
These are obviously doctored photos.<br />
<br />
<br />
How did you get mixed up in this?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's been talking to humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- Talking to humans?!<br />
<br />
<br />
He has a human girlfriend.<br />
And they make out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Make out? Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
We do not.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You wish you could.<br />
- Whose side are you on?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.<br />
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, this is what you want<br />
to do with your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
I want to do it for all our lives.<br />
Nobody works harder than bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Dad, I remember you<br />
coming home so overworked<br />
<br />
<br />
your hands were still stirring.<br />
You couldn't stop.<br />
<br />
<br />
I remember that.<br />
<br />
<br />
What right do they have to our honey?<br />
<br />
<br />
We live on two cups a year. They put it<br />
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!<br />
<br />
<br />
Even if it's true, what can one bee do?<br />
<br />
<br />
Sting them where it really hurts.<br />
<br />
<br />
In the face! The eye!<br />
<br />
<br />
- That would hurt.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Up the nose? That's a killer.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's only one place you can sting<br />
the humans, one place where it matters.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hive at Five, the hive's only<br />
full-hour action news source.<br />
<br />
<br />
No more bee beards!<br />
<br />
<br />
With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Weather with Storm Stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sports with Buzz Larvi.<br />
<br />
<br />
And Jeanette Ohung.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.<br />
- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.<br />
<br />
<br />
A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,<br />
<br />
<br />
intends to sue the human race<br />
for stealing our honey,<br />
<br />
<br />
packaging it and profiting<br />
from it illegally!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,<br />
<br />
<br />
we'll have three former queens here in<br />
our studio, discussing their new book,<br />
<br />
<br />
Olassy Ladies,<br />
out this week on Hexagon.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
Did you ever think, "I'm a kid<br />
from the hive. I can't do this"?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have never been afraid<br />
to change the world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What about Bee Oolumbus?<br />
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?<br />
<br />
<br />
Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.<br />
<br />
<br />
We were thinking<br />
of stickball or candy stores.<br />
<br />
<br />
How old are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
The bee community<br />
is supporting you in this case,<br />
<br />
<br />
which will be the trial<br />
of the bee century.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, they have a Larry King<br />
in the human world too.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a common name. Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
He looks like you and has a show<br />
and suspenders and colored dots...<br />
<br />
<br />
Next week...<br />
<br />
<br />
Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the<br />
guest even though you just heard 'em.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bear Week next week!<br />
They're scary, hairy and here live.<br />
<br />
<br />
Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,<br />
squinty eyes, very Jewish.<br />
<br />
<br />
In tennis, you attack<br />
at the point of weakness!<br />
<br />
<br />
It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.<br />
<br />
<br />
Honey, her backhand's a joke!<br />
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?<br />
<br />
<br />
Quiet, please.<br />
Actual work going on here.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that that same bee?<br />
- Yes, it is!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm helping him sue the human race.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hello.<br />
- Hello, bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size<br />
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why does he talk again?<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, you better go<br />
'cause we're really busy working.<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's our yogurt night!<br />
<br />
<br />
Bye-bye.<br />
<br />
<br />
Why is yogurt night so difficult?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You poor thing.<br />
You two have been at this for hours!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, and Adam here<br />
has been a huge help.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Frosting...<br />
- How many sugars?<br />
<br />
<br />
Just one. I try not<br />
to use the competition.<br />
<br />
<br />
So why are you helping me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have good qualities.<br />
<br />
<br />
And it takes my mind off the shop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Instead of flowers, people<br />
are giving balloon bouquets now.<br />
<br />
<br />
Those are great, if you're three.<br />
<br />
<br />
And artificial flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, those just get me psychotic!<br />
- Yeah, me too.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bent stingers, pointless pollination.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees must hate those fake things!<br />
<br />
<br />
Nothing worse<br />
than a daffodil that's had work done.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe this could make up<br />
for it a little bit.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.<br />
- I guess.<br />
<br />
<br />
You sure you want to go through with it?<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I sure? When I'm done with<br />
the humans, they won't be able<br />
<br />
<br />
to say, "Honey, I'm home,"<br />
without paying a royalty!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's an incredible scene<br />
here in downtown Manhattan,<br />
<br />
<br />
where the world anxiously waits,<br />
because for the first time in history,<br />
<br />
<br />
we will hear for ourselves<br />
if a honeybee can actually speak.<br />
<br />
<br />
What have we gotten into here, Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's pretty big, isn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't believe how many humans<br />
don't work during the day.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think billion-dollar multinational<br />
food companies have good lawyers?<br />
<br />
<br />
Everybody needs to stay<br />
behind the barricade.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's the matter?<br />
- I don't know, I just got a chill.<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, if it isn't the bee team.<br />
<br />
<br />
You boys work on this?<br />
<br />
<br />
All rise! The Honorable<br />
Judge Bumbleton presiding.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Oase number 4475,<br />
<br />
<br />
Superior Oourt of New York,<br />
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry<br />
<br />
<br />
is now in session.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery, you're representing<br />
the five food companies collectively?<br />
<br />
<br />
A privilege.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson... you're representing<br />
all the bees of the world?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,<br />
we're ready to proceed.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Montgomery,<br />
your opening statement, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,<br />
<br />
<br />
my grandmother was a simple woman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Born on a farm, she believed<br />
it was man's divine right<br />
<br />
<br />
to benefit from the bounty<br />
of nature God put before us.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we lived in the topsy-turvy world<br />
Mr. Benson imagines,<br />
<br />
<br />
just think of what would it mean.<br />
<br />
<br />
I would have to negotiate<br />
with the silkworm<br />
<br />
<br />
for the elastic in my britches!<br />
<br />
<br />
Talking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we know this isn't some sort of<br />
<br />
<br />
holographic motion-picture-capture<br />
Hollywood wizardry?<br />
<br />
<br />
They could be using laser beams!<br />
<br />
<br />
Robotics! Ventriloquism!<br />
Oloning! For all we know,<br />
<br />
<br />
he could be on steroids!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen,<br />
there's no trickery here.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm just an ordinary bee.<br />
Honey's pretty important to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's important to all bees.<br />
We invented it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We make it. And we protect it<br />
with our lives.<br />
<br />
<br />
Unfortunately, there are<br />
some people in this room<br />
<br />
<br />
who think they can take it from us<br />
<br />
<br />
'cause we're the little guys!<br />
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,<br />
<br />
<br />
you'll see how, by taking our honey,<br />
you not only take everything we have<br />
<br />
<br />
but everything we are!<br />
<br />
<br />
I wish he'd dress like that<br />
all the time. So nice!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oall your first witness.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden<br />
of Honey Farms, big company you have.<br />
<br />
<br />
I suppose so.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see you also own<br />
Honeyburton and Honron!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, they provide beekeepers<br />
for our farms.<br />
<br />
<br />
Beekeeper. I find that<br />
to be a very disturbing term.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't imagine you employ<br />
any bee-free-ers, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- I couldn't hear you.<br />
<br />
<br />
- No.<br />
- No.<br />
<br />
<br />
Because you don't free bees.<br />
You keep bees. Not only that,<br />
<br />
<br />
it seems you thought a bear would be<br />
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're very lovable creatures.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.<br />
<br />
<br />
You mean like this?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bears kill bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
How'd you like his head crashing<br />
through your living room?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Biting into your couch!<br />
Spitting out your throw pillows!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, that's enough. Take him away.<br />
<br />
<br />
So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.<br />
Your name intrigues me.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where have I heard it before?<br />
- I was with a band called The Police.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you've never been<br />
a police officer, have you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I haven't.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, you haven't. And so here<br />
we have yet another example<br />
<br />
<br />
of bee culture casually<br />
stolen by a human<br />
<br />
<br />
for nothing more than<br />
a prance-about stage name.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, please.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?<br />
<br />
<br />
Because I'm feeling<br />
a little stung, Sting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's not his real name?! You idiots!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Liotta, first,<br />
belated congratulations on<br />
<br />
<br />
your Emmy win for a guest spot<br />
on ER in 2005.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. Thank you.<br />
<br />
<br />
I see from your resume<br />
that you're devilishly handsome<br />
<br />
<br />
with a churning inner turmoil<br />
that's ready to blow.<br />
<br />
<br />
I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?<br />
<br />
<br />
Not yet it isn't. But is this<br />
what it's come to for you?<br />
<br />
<br />
Exploiting tiny, helpless bees<br />
so you don't<br />
<br />
<br />
have to rehearse<br />
your part and learn your lines, sir?<br />
<br />
<br />
Watch it, Benson!<br />
I could blow right now!<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't a goodfella.<br />
This is a badfella!<br />
<br />
<br />
Why doesn't someone just step on<br />
this creep, and we can all go home?!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Order in this court!<br />
- You're all thinking it!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order, I say!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Say it!<br />
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think it was awfully nice<br />
of that bear to pitch in like that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I think the jury's on our side.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we doing everything right, legally?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a florist.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Well, here's to a great team.<br />
<br />
<br />
To a great team!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Ken!<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think you were coming.<br />
<br />
<br />
No, I was just late.<br />
I tried to call, but... the battery.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't want all this to go to waste,<br />
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, that was lucky.<br />
<br />
<br />
There's a little left.<br />
I could heat it up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.<br />
<br />
<br />
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not much for the game myself.<br />
The ball's a little grabby.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's where I usually sit.<br />
Right... there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,<br />
<br />
<br />
and he agreed with me that eating with<br />
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think I don't see what you're doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know how hard it is to find<br />
the rightjob. We have that in common.<br />
<br />
<br />
Do we?<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees have 100 percent employment,<br />
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's just what<br />
I was thinking about doing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor<br />
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm going to drain the old stinger.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah, you do that.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at that.<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I've just about had it<br />
<br />
<br />
with your little mind games.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What's that?<br />
- Italian Vogue.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.<br />
<br />
<br />
A lot of ads.<br />
<br />
<br />
Remember what Van said, why is<br />
your life more valuable than mine?<br />
<br />
<br />
Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think something stinks in here!<br />
<br />
<br />
I love the smell of flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
How do you like the smell of flames?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Not as much.<br />
<br />
<br />
Water bug! Not taking sides!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!<br />
This is pathetic!<br />
<br />
<br />
I've got issues!<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, well, well, a royal flush!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You're bluffing.<br />
- Am I?<br />
<br />
<br />
Surf's up, dude!<br />
<br />
<br />
Poo water!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bowl is gnarly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Except for those dirty yellow rings!<br />
<br />
<br />
Kenneth! What are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I don't even like honey!<br />
I don't eat it!<br />
<br />
<br />
We need to talk!<br />
<br />
<br />
He's just a little bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
And he happens to be<br />
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!<br />
<br />
<br />
Long time? What are you talking about?!<br />
Are there other bugs in your life?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, but there are other things bugging<br />
me in life. And you're one of them!<br />
<br />
<br />
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...<br />
<br />
<br />
My nerves are fried from riding<br />
on this emotional roller coaster!<br />
<br />
<br />
Goodbye, Ken.<br />
<br />
<br />
And for your information,<br />
<br />
<br />
I prefer sugar-free, artificial<br />
sweeteners made by man!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry about all that.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know it's got<br />
an aftertaste! I like it!<br />
<br />
<br />
I always felt there was some kind<br />
of barrier between Ken and me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I couldn't overcome it.<br />
Oh, well.<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you OK for the trial?<br />
<br />
<br />
I believe Mr. Montgomery<br />
is about out of ideas.<br />
<br />
<br />
We would like to call<br />
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good idea! You can really see why he's<br />
considered one of the best lawyers...<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
Layton, you've<br />
gotta weave some magic<br />
<br />
<br />
with this jury,<br />
or it's gonna be all over.<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't worry. The only thing I have<br />
to do to turn this jury around<br />
<br />
<br />
is to remind them<br />
of what they don't like about bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You got the tweezers?<br />
- Are you allergic?<br />
<br />
<br />
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you<br />
what I think we'd all like to know.<br />
<br />
<br />
What exactly is your relationship<br />
<br />
<br />
to that woman?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're friends.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Good friends?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How good? Do you live together?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute...<br />
<br />
<br />
Are you her little...<br />
<br />
<br />
...bedbug?<br />
<br />
<br />
I've seen a bee documentary or two.<br />
From what I understand,<br />
<br />
<br />
doesn't your queen give birth<br />
to all the bee children?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yeah, but...<br />
- So those aren't your real parents!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Oh, Barry...<br />
- Yes, they are!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold me back!<br />
<br />
<br />
You're an illegitimate bee,<br />
aren't you, Benson?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's denouncing bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't y'all date your cousins?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Objection!<br />
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, don't! It's what he wants!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, I'm hit!!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, lordy, I am hit!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order! Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
The venom! The venom<br />
is coursing through my veins!<br />
<br />
<br />
I have been felled<br />
by a winged beast of destruction!<br />
<br />
<br />
You see? You can't treat them<br />
like equals! They're striped savages!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stinging's the only thing<br />
they know! It's their way!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Adam, stay with me.<br />
- I can't feel my legs.<br />
<br />
<br />
What angel of mercy<br />
will come forward to suck the poison<br />
<br />
<br />
from my heaving buttocks?<br />
<br />
<br />
I will have order in this court. Order!<br />
<br />
<br />
Order, please!<br />
<br />
<br />
The case of the honeybees<br />
versus the human race<br />
<br />
<br />
took a pointed turn against the bees<br />
<br />
<br />
yesterday when one of their legal<br />
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hey, buddy.<br />
- Hey.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is there much pain?<br />
- Yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
I...<br />
<br />
<br />
I blew the whole case, didn't I?<br />
<br />
<br />
It doesn't matter. What matters is<br />
you're alive. You could have died.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd be better off dead. Look at me.<br />
<br />
<br />
They got it from the cafeteria<br />
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look, there's<br />
a little celery still on it.<br />
<br />
<br />
What was it like to sting someone?<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't explain it. It was all...<br />
<br />
<br />
All adrenaline and then...<br />
and then ecstasy!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right.<br />
<br />
<br />
You think it was all a trap?<br />
<br />
<br />
Of course. I'm sorry.<br />
I flew us right into this.<br />
<br />
<br />
What were we thinking? Look at us. We're<br />
just a couple of bugs in this world.<br />
<br />
<br />
What will the humans do to us<br />
if they win?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
I hear they put the roaches in motels.<br />
That doesn't sound so bad.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, they check in,<br />
but they don't check out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oould you get a nurse<br />
to close that window?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why?<br />
- The smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right. Bees don't smoke.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees don't smoke!<br />
But some bees are smoking.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's it! That's our case!<br />
<br />
<br />
It is? It's not over?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
Get back to the court and stall.<br />
Stall any way you can.<br />
<br />
<br />
And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes? Yes, Your Honor!<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is the rest of your team?<br />
<br />
<br />
Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,<br />
<br />
<br />
and as a result,<br />
we don't make very good time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I actually heard a funny story about...<br />
<br />
<br />
Your Honor,<br />
haven't these ridiculous bugs<br />
<br />
<br />
taken up enough<br />
of this court's valuable time?<br />
<br />
<br />
How much longer will we allow<br />
these absurd shenanigans to go on?<br />
<br />
<br />
They have presented no compelling<br />
evidence to support their charges<br />
<br />
<br />
against my clients,<br />
who run legitimate businesses.<br />
<br />
<br />
I move for a complete dismissal<br />
of this entire case!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going<br />
<br />
<br />
to have to consider<br />
Mr. Montgomery's motion.<br />
<br />
<br />
But you can't! We have a terrific case.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where is your proof?<br />
Where is the evidence?<br />
<br />
<br />
Show me the smoking gun!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it, Your Honor!<br />
You want a smoking gun?<br />
<br />
<br />
Here is your smoking gun.<br />
<br />
<br />
What is that?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a bee smoker!<br />
<br />
<br />
What, this?<br />
This harmless little contraption?<br />
<br />
<br />
This couldn't hurt a fly,<br />
let alone a bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Look at what has happened<br />
<br />
<br />
to bees who have never been asked,<br />
"Smoking or non?"<br />
<br />
<br />
Is this what nature intended for us?<br />
<br />
<br />
To be forcibly addicted<br />
to smoke machines<br />
<br />
<br />
and man-made wooden slat work camps?<br />
<br />
<br />
Living out our lives as honey slaves<br />
to the white man?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What are we gonna do?<br />
- He's playing the species card.<br />
<br />
<br />
Ladies and gentlemen, please,<br />
free these bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Free the bees! Free the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
The court finds in favor of the bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, we won!<br />
<br />
<br />
I knew you could do it! High-five!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm OK! You know what this means?<br />
<br />
<br />
All the honey<br />
will finally belong to the bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Now we won't have<br />
to work so hard all the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is an unholy perversion<br />
of the balance of nature, Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
You'll regret this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, how much honey is out there?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. One at a time.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, who are you wearing?<br />
<br />
<br />
My sweater is Ralph Lauren,<br />
and I have no pants.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What if Montgomery's right?<br />
- What do you mean?<br />
<br />
<br />
We've been living the bee way<br />
a long time, 27 million years.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oongratulations on your victory.<br />
What will you demand as a settlement?<br />
<br />
<br />
First, we'll demand a complete shutdown<br />
of all bee work camps.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then we want back the honey<br />
that was ours to begin with,<br />
<br />
<br />
every last drop.<br />
<br />
<br />
We demand an end to the glorification<br />
of the bear as anything more<br />
<br />
<br />
than a filthy, smelly,<br />
bad-breath stink machine.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're all aware<br />
of what they do in the woods.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait for my signal.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take him out.<br />
<br />
<br />
He'll have nauseous<br />
for a few hours, then he'll be fine.<br />
<br />
<br />
And we will no longer tolerate<br />
bee-negative nicknames...<br />
<br />
<br />
But it's just a prance-about stage name!<br />
<br />
<br />
...unnecessary inclusion of honey<br />
in bogus health products<br />
<br />
<br />
and la-dee-da human<br />
tea-time snack garnishments.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan't breathe.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring it in, boys!<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it right there! Good.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tap it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,<br />
and there's gallons more coming!<br />
<br />
<br />
- I think we need to shut down!<br />
- Shut down? We've never shut down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Shut down honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop making honey!<br />
<br />
<br />
Turn your key, sir!<br />
<br />
<br />
What do we do now?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oannonball!<br />
<br />
<br />
We're shutting honey production!<br />
<br />
<br />
Mission abort.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aborting pollination and nectar detail.<br />
Returning to base.<br />
<br />
<br />
Adam, you wouldn't believe<br />
how much honey was out there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah?<br />
<br />
<br />
What's going on? Where is everybody?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Are they out celebrating?<br />
- They're home.<br />
<br />
<br />
They don't know what to do.<br />
Laying out, sleeping in.<br />
<br />
<br />
I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way<br />
to San Antonio with a cricket.<br />
<br />
<br />
At least we got our honey back.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I think, so what if humans<br />
liked our honey? Who wouldn't?<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the greatest thing in the world!<br />
I was excited to be part of making it.<br />
<br />
<br />
This was my new desk. This was my<br />
new job. I wanted to do it really well.<br />
<br />
<br />
And now...<br />
<br />
<br />
Now I can't.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't understand<br />
why they're not happy.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought their lives would be better!<br />
<br />
<br />
They're doing nothing. It's amazing.<br />
Honey really changes people.<br />
<br />
<br />
You don't have any idea<br />
what's going on, do you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- What did you want to show me?<br />
- This.<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
That is not the half of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, no. Oh, my.<br />
<br />
<br />
They're all wilting.<br />
<br />
<br />
Doesn't look very good, does it?<br />
<br />
<br />
No.<br />
<br />
<br />
And whose fault do you think that is?<br />
<br />
<br />
You know, I'm gonna guess bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bees?<br />
<br />
<br />
Specifically, me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I didn't think bees not needing to make<br />
honey would affect all these things.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's notjust flowers.<br />
Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our whole SAT test right there.<br />
<br />
<br />
Take away produce, that affects<br />
the entire animal kingdom.<br />
<br />
<br />
And then, of course...<br />
<br />
<br />
The human species?<br />
<br />
<br />
So if there's no more pollination,<br />
<br />
<br />
it could all just go south here,<br />
couldn't it?<br />
<br />
<br />
I know this is also partly my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about a suicide pact?<br />
<br />
<br />
How do we do it?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I'll sting you, you step on me.<br />
- Thatjust kills you twice.<br />
<br />
<br />
Right, right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, Barry...<br />
sorry, but I gotta get going.<br />
<br />
<br />
I had to open my mouth and talk.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa?<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa? Why are you leaving?<br />
Where are you going?<br />
<br />
<br />
To the final Tournament of Roses parade<br />
in Pasadena.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've moved it to this weekend<br />
because all the flowers are dying.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's the last chance<br />
I'll ever have to see it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.<br />
I never meant it to turn out like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Me neither.<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses.<br />
Roses can't do sports.<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa!<br />
<br />
<br />
Roses?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Roses are flowers!<br />
- Yes, they are.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers, bees, pollen!<br />
<br />
<br />
I know.<br />
That's why this is the last parade.<br />
<br />
<br />
Maybe not.<br />
Oould you ask him to slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Oould you slow down?<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
OK, I made a huge mistake.<br />
This is a total disaster, all my fault.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, it kind of is.<br />
<br />
<br />
I've ruined the planet.<br />
I wanted to help you<br />
<br />
<br />
with the flower shop.<br />
I've made it worse.<br />
<br />
<br />
Actually, it's completely closed down.<br />
<br />
<br />
I thought maybe you were remodeling.<br />
<br />
<br />
But I have another idea, and it's<br />
greater than my previous ideas combined.<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't want to hear it!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, they have the roses,<br />
the roses have the pollen.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know every bee, plant<br />
and flower bud in this park.<br />
<br />
<br />
All we gotta do is get what they've got<br />
back here with what we've got.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Bees.<br />
- Park.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Pollen!<br />
- Flowers.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Repollination!<br />
- Across the nation!<br />
<br />
<br />
Tournament of Roses,<br />
Pasadena, Oalifornia.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've got nothing<br />
but flowers, floats and cotton candy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Security will be tight.<br />
<br />
<br />
I have an idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa Bloome, FTD.<br />
<br />
<br />
Official floral business. It's real.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you. It was a gift.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once inside,<br />
we just pick the right float.<br />
<br />
<br />
How about The Princess and the Pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
I could be the princess,<br />
and you could be the pea!<br />
<br />
<br />
Yes, I got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Where should I sit?<br />
- What are you?<br />
<br />
<br />
- I believe I'm the pea.<br />
- The pea?<br />
<br />
<br />
It goes under the mattresses.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.<br />
- I'm getting the marshal.<br />
<br />
<br />
You do that!<br />
This whole parade is a fiasco!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let's see what this baby'll do.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hey, what are you doing?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then all we do<br />
is blend in with traffic...<br />
<br />
<br />
...without arousing suspicion.<br />
<br />
<br />
Once at the airport,<br />
there's no stopping us.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stop! Security.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You and your insect pack your float?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
Has it been<br />
in your possession the entire time?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you remove your shoes?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Remove your stinger.<br />
- It's part of me.<br />
<br />
<br />
I know. Just having some fun.<br />
Enjoy your flight.<br />
<br />
<br />
Then if we're lucky, we'll have<br />
just enough pollen to do the job.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan you believe how lucky we are? We<br />
have just enough pollen to do the job!<br />
<br />
<br />
I think this is gonna work.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got to work.<br />
<br />
<br />
Attention, passengers,<br />
this is Oaptain Scott.<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a bit of bad weather<br />
in New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
It looks like we'll experience<br />
a couple hours delay.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, these are cut flowers<br />
with no water. They'll never make it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I gotta get up there<br />
and talk to them.<br />
<br />
<br />
Be careful.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oan I get help<br />
with the Sky Mall magazine?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'd like to order the talking<br />
inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What'd you say, Hal?<br />
- Nothing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't freak out! My entire species...<br />
<br />
<br />
What are you doing?<br />
<br />
<br />
- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!<br />
- Who's an attorney?<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't move.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Good afternoon, passengers.<br />
This is your captain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B<br />
please report to the cockpit?<br />
<br />
<br />
And please hurry!<br />
<br />
<br />
What happened here?<br />
<br />
<br />
There was a DustBuster,<br />
a toupee, a life raft exploded.<br />
<br />
<br />
One's bald, one's in a boat,<br />
they're both unconscious!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Is that another bee joke?<br />
- No!<br />
<br />
<br />
No one's flying the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.<br />
What's your status?<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Vanessa Bloome.<br />
I'm a florist from New York.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where's the pilot?<br />
<br />
<br />
He's unconscious,<br />
and so is the copilot.<br />
<br />
<br />
Not good. Does anyone onboard<br />
have flight experience?<br />
<br />
<br />
As a matter of fact, there is.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Who's that?<br />
- Barry Benson.<br />
<br />
<br />
From the honey trial?! Oh, great.<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, this is nothing more<br />
than a big metal bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's got giant wings, huge engines.<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?<br />
- Yes.<br />
<br />
<br />
How hard could it be?<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, Barry!<br />
We're headed into some lightning.<br />
<br />
<br />
This is Bob Bumble. We have some<br />
late-breaking news from JFK Airport,<br />
<br />
<br />
where a suspenseful scene<br />
is developing.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry Benson,<br />
fresh from his legal victory...<br />
<br />
<br />
That's Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
...is attempting to land a plane,<br />
loaded with people, flowers<br />
<br />
<br />
and an incapacitated flight crew.<br />
<br />
<br />
Flowers?!<br />
<br />
<br />
We have a storm in the area<br />
and two individuals at the controls<br />
<br />
<br />
with absolutely no flight experience.<br />
<br />
<br />
Just a minute.<br />
There's a bee on that plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson<br />
and his no-account compadres.<br />
<br />
<br />
They've done enough damage.<br />
<br />
<br />
But isn't he your only hope?<br />
<br />
<br />
Technically, a bee<br />
shouldn't be able to fly at all.<br />
<br />
<br />
Their wings are too small...<br />
<br />
<br />
Haven't we heard this a million times?<br />
<br />
<br />
"The surface area of the wings<br />
and body mass make no sense."<br />
<br />
<br />
- Get this on the air!<br />
- Got it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Stand by.<br />
- We're going live.<br />
<br />
<br />
The way we work may be a mystery to you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Making honey takes a lot of bees<br />
doing a lot of small jobs.<br />
<br />
<br />
But let me tell you about a small job.<br />
<br />
<br />
If you do it well,<br />
it makes a big difference.<br />
<br />
<br />
More than we realized.<br />
To us, to everyone.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's why I want to get bees<br />
back to working together.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's the bee way!<br />
We're not made of Jell-O.<br />
<br />
<br />
We get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow!<br />
- Hello!<br />
<br />
<br />
Left, right, down, hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hover?<br />
- Forget hover.<br />
<br />
<br />
This isn't so hard.<br />
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, what happened?!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait, I think we were<br />
on autopilot the whole time.<br />
<br />
<br />
- That may have been helping me.<br />
- And now we're not!<br />
<br />
<br />
So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.<br />
<br />
<br />
All of you, let's get<br />
behind this fellow! Move it out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Move out!<br />
<br />
<br />
Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,<br />
you copy me with the wings of the plane!<br />
<br />
<br />
Don't have to yell.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not yelling!<br />
We're in a lot of trouble.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's very hard to concentrate<br />
with that panicky tone in your voice!<br />
<br />
<br />
It's not a tone. I'm panicking!<br />
<br />
<br />
I can't do this!<br />
<br />
<br />
Vanessa, pull yourself together.<br />
You have to snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
You snap out of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
- You snap out of it!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Hold it!<br />
- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.<br />
<br />
<br />
How is the plane flying?<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hello?<br />
<br />
<br />
Benson, got any flowers<br />
for a happy occasion in there?<br />
<br />
<br />
The Pollen Jocks!<br />
<br />
<br />
They do get behind a fellow.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Black and yellow.<br />
- Hello.<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, let's drop this tin can<br />
on the blacktop.<br />
<br />
<br />
Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?<br />
<br />
<br />
No, nothing. It's all cloudy.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
- Thinking bee.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
Wait a minute.<br />
I think I'm feeling something.<br />
<br />
<br />
- What?<br />
- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.<br />
<br />
<br />
Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.<br />
<br />
<br />
Bring the nose down.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- What in the world is on the tarmac?<br />
- Get some lights on that!<br />
<br />
<br />
Thinking bee!<br />
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Vanessa, aim for the flower.<br />
- OK.<br />
<br />
<br />
Out the engines. We're going in<br />
on bee power. Ready, boys?<br />
<br />
<br />
Affirmative!<br />
<br />
<br />
Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Land on that flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
Ready? Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Spin it around!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Not that flower! The other one!<br />
- Which one?<br />
<br />
<br />
- That flower.<br />
- I'm aiming at the flower!<br />
<br />
<br />
That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.<br />
I mean the giant pulsating flower<br />
<br />
<br />
made of millions of bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.<br />
<br />
<br />
Rotate around it.<br />
<br />
<br />
- This is insane, Barry!<br />
- This's the only way I know how to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane<br />
flying in an insect-like pattern?<br />
<br />
<br />
Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.<br />
Smell it. Full reverse!<br />
<br />
<br />
Just drop it. Be a part of it.<br />
<br />
<br />
Aim for the center!<br />
<br />
<br />
Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!<br />
<br />
<br />
Oome on, already.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, we did it!<br />
You taught me how to fly!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Yes. No high-five!<br />
- Right.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, it worked!<br />
Did you see the giant flower?<br />
<br />
<br />
What giant flower? Where? Of course<br />
I saw the flower! That was genius!<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thank you.<br />
- But we're not done yet.<br />
<br />
<br />
Listen, everyone!<br />
<br />
<br />
This runway is covered<br />
with the last pollen<br />
<br />
<br />
from the last flowers<br />
available anywhere on Earth.<br />
<br />
<br />
That means this is our last chance.<br />
<br />
<br />
We're the only ones who make honey,<br />
pollinate flowers and dress like this.<br />
<br />
<br />
If we're gonna survive as a species,<br />
this is our moment! What do you say?<br />
<br />
<br />
Are we going to be bees, orjust<br />
Museum of Natural History keychains?<br />
<br />
<br />
We're bees!<br />
<br />
<br />
Keychain!<br />
<br />
<br />
Then follow me! Except Keychain.<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold on, Barry. Here.<br />
<br />
<br />
You've earned this.<br />
<br />
<br />
Yeah!<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect<br />
fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.<br />
<br />
<br />
Oh, yeah.<br />
<br />
<br />
That's our Barry.<br />
<br />
<br />
Mom! The bees are back!<br />
<br />
<br />
If anybody needs<br />
to make a call, now's the time.<br />
<br />
<br />
I got a feeling we'll be<br />
working late tonight!<br />
<br />
<br />
Here's your change. Have a great<br />
afternoon! Oan I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you like some honey with that?<br />
It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.<br />
<br />
<br />
Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.<br />
And I don't see a nickel!<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes I just feel<br />
like a piece of meat!<br />
<br />
<br />
I had no idea.<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I'm sorry.<br />
Have you got a moment?<br />
<br />
<br />
Would you excuse me?<br />
My mosquito associate will help you.<br />
<br />
<br />
Sorry I'm late.<br />
<br />
<br />
He's a lawyer too?<br />
<br />
<br />
I was already a blood-sucking parasite.<br />
All I needed was a briefcase.<br />
<br />
<br />
Have a great afternoon!<br />
<br />
<br />
Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,<br />
and I can't get them anywhere.<br />
<br />
<br />
No problem, Vannie.<br />
Just leave it to me.<br />
<br />
<br />
You're a lifesaver, Barry.<br />
Oan I help who's next?<br />
<br />
<br />
All right, scramble, jocks!<br />
It's time to fly.<br />
<br />
<br />
Thank you, Barry!<br />
<br />
<br />
That bee is living my life!<br />
<br />
<br />
Let it go, Kenny.<br />
<br />
<br />
- When will this nightmare end?!<br />
- Let it all go.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Beautiful day to fly.<br />
- Sure is.<br />
<br />
<br />
Between you and me,<br />
I was dying to get out of that office.<br />
<br />
<br />
You have got<br />
to start thinking bee, my friend.<br />
<br />
<br />
- Thinking bee!<br />
- Me?<br />
<br />
<br />
Hold it. Let's just stop<br />
for a second. Hold it.<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.<br />
Can we stop here?<br />
<br />
<br />
I'm not making a major life decision<br />
during a production number!<br />
<br />
<br />
All right. Take ten, everybody.<br />
Wrap it up, guys.</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20160905&diff=8019Minutes201609052016-09-08T21:13:48Z<p>Sonia: Fixed spelling of my name</p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
The event was fun and delicious<br />
Went to Kennywood! RIP Phone 2015-2016<br />
DYLAN<br />
Watched movies (just kidding shit exploded. literally)<br />
We have new people!<br />
MURPHY<br />
Began with the event<br />
Saw a shit ton of bands<br />
There were goats<br />
We have an event! (I'll describe it later that trend is going to be a thing okay exec???)<br />
RIN<br />
ZOOTOPIA AHHHHHHH<br />
Made a readme<br />
HARRY<br />
Event and furries<br />
JOE<br />
(actually was Shelby)<br />
NIKA<br />
Was betrayed by Murphy and the goats<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
Apparently we're not students<br />
We have a party! It's R7<br />
Roselawn Terrace 7<br />
7PM on Saturday<br />
Message Dylan or Murphy<br />
Wigglytuff: noooooooo<br />
Salute everybody!<br />
Everyone is sick<br />
Queer-y<br />
Something in french<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
Quinn has the thing<br />
Scott Pilgrim references are not their fault<br />
No old business!<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Motion to create a business founded in 1851<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Brian $1<br />
Chaired by everyone who remembers what committee we're in<br />
I just thought of this neat pun committee<br />
rip<br />
I just thought of this neat pun committee<br />
I don't know Steven, what would be it's purpose?<br />
We got onto a stack tangent<br />
It failed<br />
Fuck you Brian (that was kinda cool though)<br />
What's going on I don't understand<br />
Saying I just woke up five minutes ago whether or not this is true<br />
WAKE ME UP INSIDE<br />
BAKE ME UP A PIE<br />
OVENESCENCE<br />
KGB IS ON FIRE<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Shelby for $3<br />
Chaired by Samuel Collingwood Smith<br />
Slightly intolerable pedantry committee<br />
Is that even a real thing<br />
Yes?<br />
Crush Joe<br />
We are now in purple<br />
It passed?<br />
Sold to Quinn for $2<br />
Chaired by the accidental firing of the bottom of their stack modus?<br />
Flashling lights and funny hand signals committee<br />
OH NO YOU'VE BEEN SPOOKED BY THE GHOST OF EXPENSIVE COMMITEES UPVOTE RIGHT NOW OR NEVER BUY COMMITTEES AGAIN<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Murphy for $2<br />
Chaired by everyone who can bid on committees now<br />
Running jumping climbing trees committee<br />
Stalin'est emo<br />
It failed<br />
Motion to untable all old business<br />
Tim don't graduate committee<br />
Motion to table indefinitely<br />
It passed<br />
Goodbye<br />
Committee to investigate why homeless people only drink coffee<br />
Classism<br />
Committee to see how long we can say nothing without taking another breath<br />
Sold to Steven for $2<br />
Disbanded<br />
Spoontinoodigus committee<br />
My hat was good<br />
You can't survive off rabbit meat<br />
Passed<br />
Sold to Murphy for $3<br />
Chaired by spoontinoodigous committee<br />
Coughing into your elbow looks like a dab<br />
*Cough dab*<br />
We all look like vampires<br />
It failed<br />
Why is the KGB so invested in the DC character, The Question<br />
Sonia memorial appreciation committee<br />
Making sure no committee ever passes again<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Owen for $4<br />
Chaired by everybody<br />
Tell Sam where KGB is today<br />
KGB is in Breed Hall<br />
Don't exceed $150 for the event<br />
It passed<br />
Sex number committee<br />
Heehee 420<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Joe for $1<br />
Chaired by Steven's butt<br />
Committee to table chairs forever<br />
Pretty much that<br />
Tabled forever<br />
Celebrate the end of the reign of the millenials in the Zootopia<br />
Chief Justice Dumbledore is no longer a thing<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Joe for $1<br />
Chaired by all the millenials/snake people<br />
REAL RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
Underground Tour <br />
Friday, 7PM UC Black Chairs<br />
Email Murphy if you want to help<br />
Come to Exec Meetings<br />
UC 306 Tuesdays at 5:30<br />
Pay your dues<br />
We get dinner after this, come chill<br />
SHMUCKS<br />
We still have R7<br />
Sonia is teaching weapons for the uprising<br />
GTFO</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20160829&diff=7998Minutes201608292016-08-30T01:33:37Z<p>Sonia: Fixed spelling of my name</p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
SKYE<br />
had a summer break<br />
[REDACTED]<br />
DYLAN<br />
BIG DATA<br />
Lots of new people<br />
Apparently Newtown sucks?<br />
MURPHY<br />
Drove across the country<br />
Florence and the machine<br />
Star trek con 2k16<br />
Their shirt was clever<br />
We have an event!(I'm just gonna do this at the end during real relevant announcements)<br />
RIN<br />
Worked at a korean bakery and didn't get fed :(<br />
MADE A PRAVDA<br />
HARRY<br />
conventions<br />
voice gone <br />
rip<br />
JOE<br />
[REDACTED]<br />
NIKA<br />
Europe and ice<br />
it was cool (i'm funny i promise)<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
Sonia is dead apparently?<br />
Bye son<br />
Swear of the week: Bubbahotep<br />
Existing committee is doing that<br />
Something about rabbits I think<br />
Karen has the thing!<br />
Donald Trump is not their fault<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The last committee that will be made with Mike as president<br />
tabled forever<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Metaphor for how we're gonna be making it rain in a few years committee<br />
This has flooded<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Dillon for $3<br />
owned by anybody who got rained on yesterday<br />
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?<br />
Because they taste funny<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Sonia for $3<br />
Owned by anyone who's a communist<br />
House unamerican cheeses committee<br />
God damn it Tim<br />
It passed<br />
Tim $1<br />
Hillary Clinton owns it<br />
Convince the KGB to accept more currency<br />
Take my wife please?<br />
Liberty Mutual is no longer a bank<br />
Tiny lil bank babies<br />
Is a sperm bank a fucking bank?<br />
Sold to afalk $3<br />
Anyone with a job<br />
Motion to found the negative first national bank of spiders<br />
null pointer error<br />
In other news Skye is savage<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to Frieder $2<br />
Owned by people?<br />
KGB archeology committee<br />
Ancient memes<br />
Motion to bury this committee<br />
Motion to table for 3 years<br />
It passed<br />
MOtion to not forget that committee<br />
Don't forget in 3 years that we did that<br />
Tabled for two years<br />
It passed<br />
Tim doesn't even go here<br />
Tabled for one year<br />
It passed<br />
Standing Rule: A motion to squid is always in order<br />
We're in purple<br />
It passed<br />
Motion to not spend more than $70 on stuff for the event<br />
It passed<br />
Out of order<br />
Soon to be in order committee<br />
To make things to be soon in order<br />
BUT ENTROPY<br />
It passed<br />
Sold to afalk $5<br />
REAL ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
Potluck!<br />
This friday black chairs 5:30PM<br />
Food and stuff<br />
OTHER EVENT<br />
Underground Tour<br />
Fun and big<br />
Message Murphy if you want to help<br />
Email 2vp@cmukgb.org<br />
Pay your dues to Joe<br />
Come to exec meetings<br />
SHMUCKS<br />
We have a wiki<br />
Ethan has been here for 7 years<br />
Which banded?<br />
MOtion to purple and get food<br />
GTFO</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Ineligible_to_return&diff=7949Ineligible to return2016-05-05T20:38:09Z<p>Sonia: Redirected page to ITR</p>
<hr />
<div>#redirect [[ITR]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=ITR&diff=7948ITR2016-05-05T20:37:37Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>ITR, which stands for Ineligible To Return, is a game affiliated with the [[KGB]] (although not an official KGB activity) and is played on the 4th floor of [[Wean]].<br />
<br />
The game starts out as a cross between Mafia and Tag, but as the rounds go on new concepts are introduced and rules change.<br />
<br />
== Equipment ==<br />
ITR requires a bag of fake daggers. Daggers are made by rolling up a piece of paper and wrapping it in duct tape. A minimum of one dagger per player is required, and if the Wizards or Classes rounds are going to be played, more will probably be necessary.<br />
<br />
<br />
== Permanent Rules ==<br />
Some meta rules stay no matter which round of ITR the game is currently on. Any of these rules can have specific exceptions in different rounds, but unless a new rule overrides or changes one of these rules, they are always in effect.<br />
<br />
* Kill - a kill is completed by hitting or stabbing another player with a dagger. Players who have been hit and killed go to the graveyard. They must carry their dagger in an obvious way, usually by gripping it in the middle, to indicate to active players that they have been killed and are on their way to the graveyard.<br />
<br />
* Graveyard - the Newell-Simon/Wean bridge. This is where players who have died wait until the round is over. The first player to go to the graveyard is tasked with keeping count of the people who have died and what role they were given at the beginning of the game, so that they know who is left alive and, if sufficiently few people are left, when they should begin to limit the playing area.<br />
<br />
* NEVER lie about game state. If killed, grasp your dagger in the pre-agreed manner (usually in the center) and make your way to the graveyard. When asked by your killer if you were happy, do not lie. Lying about happy status to when alive is encouraged, but once killed, it is illegal.<br />
<br />
* "Half Court!" - shouted by the people in the graveyard if the game is getting stale. Limits the play area to the tiled circle surrounding the elevators and staircases on the 4th floor, i.e. no murder hallway or carpeted extension.<br />
<br />
* "End Game!" - shouted by the people in the graveyard if the game continues to be a stalemate after limiting it to half court. Limits the play area to the hallway visible from the graveyard, which is the hallway connecting the Newell-Simon/Wean bridge and the Engineering library.<br />
<br />
* "Bloodsport!" - shouted by the people in the graveyard when the game has been limited to either half court or the end game hallway. Limits play area to the same physical space as end game and changes the game to a free-for-all where the last person alive is the victor.<br />
<br />
* "Part the Red Sea!" - said by the people in the graveyard whenever NPCs need to get past. This is a command for all dead players to move to the walls of the graveyard in order to leave enough space for people to walk through the center.<br />
<br />
* Plants - the plants may or may not be armed. Be warned. Be wary.<br />
<br />
* "Orgy!" - if a large group of people are standing around talking for a long time and a player feels like it might be holding up the game, they may shout this and leap into the center of the group. Afterwards, they must count down from three and then spin in a circle with their dagger extended. Any people they hit during this are killed, but remorse (if applicable) is not evaluated until after the circle is completed.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
== Vanilla ITR ==<br />
Vanilla ITR is the most basic form of the game. <br />
Players are all citizens of Happyville, where everyone is happy all the time. Unfortunately, recently psychos have appeared in Happyville. Psychos are remorseless killers who can only be stopped by death, and it is the duty of every upstanding happy citizen to take them down. As such, daggers have been dipped in a potent truth serum and distributed to every citizen.<br />
<br />
Upon killing a potential psycho, happy citizens must ask for the victim's happy status. <br />
<br />
<br />
== Vampires ==<br />
Psycho killers were an unpleasant experience for the citizens of Happyville, but it recently got worse. The psychos have become vampires.<br />
<br />
== Wizards ==<br />
The citizens of Happyville have stumbled across books of magic and, through much effort and training, have become wizards. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
== Classes ==<br />
<br />
== Outbreak ==<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Games]]<br />
<br />
Are you happy? ;)</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=User:Sonia&diff=7947User:Sonia2016-05-05T20:27:29Z<p>Sonia: Redirected page to Sonia</p>
<hr />
<div>#redirect [[Sonia]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160427&diff=7943MinutesExec201604272016-04-28T23:23:18Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
Skye<br />
Lots of days that were exhausting<br />
Dylan<br />
Couple days of civ 5 and no work<br />
Murphy<br />
Put off some stuff<br />
Stayed up all night and roommate puked<br />
Rin<br />
Worked on a term project<br />
Nails are butterflies<br />
Harry<br />
Studied<br />
Doesn't remember Monday night<br />
Joe<br />
Don't fuck up the indexing of an AI<br />
But eventually it'll win<br />
Did better than expected on an exam!<br />
Nika<br />
Did not sleep<br />
Almost finished final project<br />
Don't have 25 pixie sticks<br />
<br />
MONDAY'S MEETING<br />
We did good :D<br />
Exec get off your screens<br />
(Except me)<br />
Lots of talkative people are now (not?) on exec<br />
Step up and be loud in meetings<br />
(Don't actually be loud but be enthusiastic)<br />
Call the question if there's only two people involved<br />
Think of committees to use during silences<br />
Try and keep things dynamic and jumping to new people<br />
Keep officer reports brief<br />
<br />
BAKE BARTER/USA<br />
It did good<br />
We made money!<br />
Update the handbook<br />
Acoustics of the venue were weird<br />
Let's deprioritize third place<br />
More bundling!<br />
Let's try to get the black chairs again next year<br />
Still reserve a table just in case<br />
<br />
LET'S BUY DILLON'S CHALLENGE COIN<br />
<br />
FILL OUT SPACE REQUEST FORMS<br />
If it worked the first time do it again later<br />
<br />
BOOTH INSPECTIONS<br />
Dylan forward to exec pls<br />
Followup:<br />
Holder for safety sign<br />
Throw out extra paint<br />
Do we want to take things off pipes? (probably not)<br />
Get a something kit?<br />
Chemical roster<br />
<br />
EVENT<br />
LDOC Picnic<br />
Meet at black chairs leave at 5pm<br />
We have lots of food and charcoal<br />
We have too much bev<br />
$15 over budget :(<br />
Take from Exec discretionary fund<br />
Joe will grill<br />
Bring spatulas <br />
We have an official spatula apparently<br />
It's somewhere, maybe in the cooler in the office<br />
Invite Vogel<br />
Nika has a TA whose last name is Butt<br />
Bring a parachute and a dodgeball and frisbees<br />
Maybe CTFwithoutS<br />
Hopefully no rain<br />
Call it at 9:30<br />
Mike will let us use their car<br />
Some people need to help Mike, some people need to help shephard people<br />
Other people need to help bring stuff back<br />
<br />
OTHER EVENT<br />
Mafia Night<br />
May 4th<br />
We go to Bucca Di Beppo<br />
We called it worked<br />
Leave at "4:45" @ UC<br />
Exec is all going<br />
Dress mostly fancy<br />
<br />
NEXT EXEC MEETING TIME<br />
Try and get times for at least the first two meetings<br />
Send out a when to meet<br />
Try to be back at college by the 21st of August<br />
Also get the fence<br />
Pretend you like freshmen<br />
Poster<br />
We will chalk<br />
Scav hunt is August 25th<br />
Call over the summer to plan scav hunt<br />
Call to discuss new events<br />
Figure out who is gonna be back<br />
We have a list of scav hunt ideas somewhere on google drive<br />
<br />
LET'S WATCH A MOVIE DURING FINALS<br />
Not star wars<br />
Facebook poll<br />
Get a room<br />
<br />
ROOM RESERVATIONS<br />
We want to reserve the same room<br />
<br />
MISC<br />
AFS Space stuff is being sorted<br />
Dodgeball is happening?<br />
Try and help clean office Wednesday May 4th morning<br />
Underground stories <br />
Murphy is gonna set up a meeting during orientation to talk about stories<br />
1st event next year is potluck<br />
2nd event next year is Underground<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151014&diff=7930MinutesExec201510142016-04-27T19:06:38Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
tiny science<br />
<br />
skye<br />
everything is fire<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
half as fire, still fire<br />
<br />
erin<br />
was woken up by a cat that isn't her cat<br />
it was distracting her cats while it's buddy ate their trash<br />
<br />
zora<br />
kickstarter ended<br />
very tired<br />
not enough sleep<br />
<br />
joe<br />
went through a 1500 page comic over the last 24 hours<br />
has put him in a really strange place<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
rob simmons posted A LINK TO TWITTER FROM PIAZZA<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
improv night<br />
dillon emailed them today to confirm<br />
snacks<br />
mike has a car<br />
costco trip<br />
more cups, oreos, etc<br />
3pm on friday<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
midsemester break - movie night<br />
much conversation about rooms<br />
one big screen is better but it's TOO CLOSE in A14<br />
no outlets in breed<br />
A302 has that fan and the light<br />
we're trying for breed hall<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
halloween!<br />
everyone breathes a sigh of relief (it is not find the event)<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENT<br />
CtFwS (11/13)<br />
postering<br />
dillon can help modify<br />
we want to get them into the dorms EARLY<br />
rules meeting<br />
2pm sunday (10/18)<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
theme selection is tonight<br />
booth chairs will post<br />
we need to make an announcement in meeting<br />
dillon made a live update chat for exec B)<br />
bioraft<br />
booth chairs and exec need to do it<br />
you just click through it. it's easy.<br />
chairs<br />
hi <br />
<br />
OTHER THINGS<br />
realtalk<br />
there's a when2meet, we'll decide on<br />
shirts<br />
interest<br />
lots of interest in a new my actions shirt<br />
always interest in sweatshirts<br />
kgbuggy shirt also (a new one!)<br />
new<br />
i have the spirit of the thing<br />
spoontinudigu???<br />
sweatshirt design on a tshirt<br />
order forms<br />
we should have one big order form for all the stuff once we want to order it<br />
website<br />
the wiki hasn't been updated since 2008<br />
we should try to be better at taking pictures of shirts<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151021&diff=7929MinutesExec201510212016-04-27T19:06:22Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
had a day<br />
trying to write real words about real science<br />
has to be articulate and not use jargon all the time<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a day<br />
everything is broken and wrong<br />
but paid off her freshman year! three more to go<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
had a day<br />
things are starting to be less hectic?<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
9am class ended early<br />
accidentally started a new sewing project that she wasn't gonna start until after winter break<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
had a good six hours of free time<br />
did NO WORK<br />
<br />
joe<br />
had a day<br />
shit. really had a day.<br />
got an instrument about five hours ago (ukelele!)<br />
two exams (one started at 8:30)<br />
got an offer from intel yesterday!<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
yesterday he worked on compilers for 17 hours straight<br />
(10:30am-3:30am)<br />
got a reasonable amount of sleep and was then SAD<br />
has recently started his midterm that's due tonight<br />
<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
movie night<br />
friday, 7:00pm<br />
breed hall<br />
we will vote on the voting system when we get there<br />
<br />
WEEKEND EVENT<br />
nerf war<br />
saturday, 2:00pm<br />
dylan's in charge<br />
skye is going away<br />
domenic is also gonna be there<br />
they are probably gonna be in wean<br />
<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Halloween!! GBGC<br />
candy<br />
make sure to get stuff without peanuts!!<br />
dillon just reserved A18*<br />
exec should wear costumes!<br />
erin has. supplies.<br />
we should tell people to wear costumes at the meeting!<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
CtFwS<br />
watches?<br />
we need new ones and have 40 bucks<br />
amazon'll do<br />
rules meeting<br />
gonna announce that the final game will be a playtest<br />
3:00 for this week's meeting, mike will send out an email<br />
posters<br />
zora will show murphy and joe how to edit them in photoshop during the event<br />
judges meeting<br />
on monday we should start getting people to email us if they want to judge<br />
dillon will announce it<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
credit card training<br />
joe needs it<br />
shirt reprints<br />
few responses from monday's meeting<br />
designs?<br />
need them for my actions and the sweatshirt design<br />
we can do KGBuggy next semester<br />
we need to do sweatshirts this year<br />
scarves?<br />
could add a bit on the shirt order form<br />
ordering stuff<br />
we should get an idea of the price before we actually send out an order form<br />
apparently Commonwealth Press is good<br />
murphy will fill out their quote page<br />
mention that we want to put the same design on shirts and sweatshirts--we might get a cheaper price?<br />
maybe also look for other local options<br />
we can also ask student activities<br />
dillon will do this<br />
check on whether or not the uniform design is okay<br />
(it says "carnegie mellon university")<br />
joe will talk to Jay about it via email<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
meeting at 1:30 on Sunday<br />
the kage<br />
dylan and maddy and craig need keys!<br />
submit a space access request<br />
also it is a horrifying mess<br />
the booth chairs will take point on cleanup<br />
EHS stuff will be some time in the first 2 weeks of November<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151028&diff=7928MinutesExec201510282016-04-27T19:05:57Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a day<br />
submitted a proposal fell asleep is now here<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a day<br />
hit a new freelancing low<br />
instead of getting paid a normal way, got a stack of 10 20s in the mail<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a day<br />
has to give a talk in 20 minutes<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
had to take apart the top quarter of a sweater she's spent the last month knitting<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
has an assignment due and is VERY STRESSED but those things don't seem to be connected<br />
which is strange<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
nope<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
having exec on wednesday is weird because wednesdays are chillll<br />
but his tuesdays are 21 hours long<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Halloween party<br />
7:00 PHA18* friday<br />
rooms get, its gbgc so we gooooooood<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
KGB digs its own grave<br />
skye can stay the whole time<br />
can also be the singsnap card<br />
dillon is reserving breed hall<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
CtFwS<br />
we should count stuff next week<br />
the full posters are done<br />
zora will eventually get around to having the handout fixed<br />
skye will pester student activities to get posters in dorms and a mention in the RA newsletter<br />
other pieces of paper<br />
we need to reprint the cheatsheets<br />
we need to reprint the judges rulebook<br />
need to regenerate the rules presentation<br />
judges meeting<br />
announce again on monday<br />
poll people that week<br />
schedule meetings for the week of ctfws<br />
fence<br />
skye got this<br />
murphy can hold the fence<br />
he can sit ANYWHERE<br />
mike can also hold<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
shirts<br />
joe has finally paid dillon's dad<br />
other shirts<br />
he filled out the commonwealth form but didn't get an email back, so he might call them<br />
designs<br />
has my actions<br />
has the crest part of the uniform design<br />
dillon said he would get the front<br />
doesn't have the design for black ctfws<br />
mike will bug glisson<br />
the designs we do have are .ai files!!<br />
murphy will put them in the dropbox<br />
nika was interested in doing spoontinudigu<br />
murphy told her not to do it instead of schoolwork<br />
we might be able to print it in the spring with kgbuggy<br />
order form<br />
want to announce it on monday<br />
do we want nicer shirts?<br />
we don't know how much more they cost--we'll decide when we know<br />
redbubble<br />
KGB now has an account there<br />
we have to link it to a bank/paypal account<br />
we might make a KGB paypal account<br />
ITR<br />
is happening<br />
9 people including murphy<br />
murphy will make the event tonight<br />
credit card training<br />
joe is being trained nov 11, wednesday night<br />
we should have it for ctfws<br />
joe can reserve the terminal thingy right now<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151104&diff=7927MinutesExec201511042016-04-27T19:05:40Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple of days<br />
resumes are hard<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a day<br />
bleuh. death.<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
day<br />
monday was day?<br />
yes. sometimes.<br />
the only interesting thing was that dillon left the ece lab on "monday" at 5:30 am<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
all homework is due tomorrow<br />
(so she made cookies)<br />
probably mad at her capstone group but she doesn't know what anymore<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
slept for 4 hours on monday and 9 hours on tuesday and now feels weird<br />
<br />
joe<br />
had a day<br />
got shell lab done reasonably on time<br />
stayed up late doing work for 202 and then slept in past the hand in deadline<br />
terrible<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
days can be summed up by<br />
OH BOTHER pooh image where pooh's face is in the compilers honey jar<br />
also pooh's butt is centered<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
karaoke<br />
7:00, breed hall, friday<br />
skye is singsnap<br />
dillon is making events<br />
also dillon is putting the location on the calendar<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
ctfws<br />
judges<br />
7 + 7 is 14<br />
(math facts)<br />
poll for meeting times out by thursday<br />
we want to announce times on sunday<br />
new protocol for walkthrough<br />
make sure that all profs on 7th & 8th floors are aware & okay with the game going on outside<br />
if we have to cut off 8, we won't cut anything in doherty<br />
if we have to cut off 7, we'll cut off doherty 4<br />
we can keep the judges room where it is though<br />
posters<br />
get hype didn't happen but other posters did!<br />
dillon is updating it right now so that we can put them up over the weekend<br />
we might be able to get maddy to print color stuff<br />
OR use the magic student org copier<br />
skye and murphy will print tomorrow and do the thing this weekend<br />
everybody take some extra posters<br />
dorms<br />
skye is gonna just GO IN tomorrow<br />
143 posters<br />
fliers<br />
"fuck" --Zora<br />
mike will remind them<br />
fence<br />
skye still wants to take the fence<br />
BUT she'll be gone tuesday and wednesday<br />
painting on monday night or tuesday night would be best<br />
we can table all week<br />
FENCE CAMPING TRIP<br />
murphy, mike, so many people<br />
craig is so ready<br />
mike will make a spreadsheet for tuesday through thursday<br />
the poster will be up on the screen near the black chairs by friday<br />
announcements<br />
dillon will post stuff intermittently over the weekend (after puzzlehunt is done prob)<br />
erin will email all the lists<br />
a week in advance and then two days in advance<br />
new rules<br />
almost done, will try to get it by friday<br />
new presentation is done<br />
thanks dillon and tim<br />
all they have to do is get the layman's page up<br />
brown stuff?<br />
maybe not /brown/<br />
will only be playtested if it gets MADE<br />
watches<br />
we might not be able to replace the ones on the jail<br />
if we're doing the new blue belt we need new blue belt watches<br />
nobody makes a single button -> count down for a minute product<br />
the chat will figure it out<br />
cheatsheet and booklets<br />
next week<br />
credit card<br />
joe requested the terminal, got rejected bc he hasn't have the training yet<br />
he's going to talk to someone to get it sorted<br />
judges room is reserved<br />
also 2315 from 5:30 on, most of the 2 doored rooms in wean from 7:00 on<br />
not 2210, someone else is in it<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
gbgc<br />
dillon will reserve a room<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
ITR<br />
no complaints<br />
though a police officer wandered in<br />
he took murphy's name but it was all good<br />
no KGB mentions<br />
<br />
announcements for monday<br />
judges times<br />
fence<br />
mention new ctfws rule<br />
<br />
bioraft<br />
skye do your training<br />
<br />
booth<br />
lab inspection on tuesday at 1pm<br />
craig should be there, mike will be there, skye will be in eerie<br />
4:00 on saturday is kage cleanup<br />
craig is about to request a key<br />
dylan has a key<br />
maddy needs a key<br />
floorplan get!<br />
we're gonna move on to art<br />
we are hella ahead of schedule<br />
postering<br />
we'll try to recruit people in the spring<br />
(rush kgb booth)<br />
<br />
flags?<br />
there's a business frat asking if we wanna buy flags<br />
...let's ask the membership on monday if they want flag<br />
<br />
shirts<br />
murphy's head has been stuck in a compiler so he hasn't made an order form<br />
dillon sent murphy the sweatshirt design<br />
the price for 30 my actions shirts is $7.75 each<br />
uniform tshirt<br />
front and back?<br />
should just be the same as the sweatshirt<br />
cost unknown<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151111&diff=7926MinutesExec201511112016-04-27T19:05:23Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
lmao nope<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
ctfws<br />
counted stuff already<br />
judge headbands?<br />
erin's got it<br />
judges meeting<br />
the recent one was all good (and all veterens, so)<br />
no one but Joe or Erin are allowed to touch the credit card terminal<br />
(everyone should get trained though bc everyone can)<br />
shirts<br />
murphy has to bring them!!<br />
exec walkthrough<br />
meet at 5:30, judges meet at 6:00<br />
in 2315<br />
fence<br />
party after exec<br />
we're borrowing a grill from AEPi<br />
fms lost??? the grills????<br />
hold it tomorrow<br />
yes? if we can<br />
murphy can hold it most of the morning, joe will do it a lot too<br />
we've got people for overnight tonight<br />
rules presentation<br />
people:<br />
dillon<br />
joe<br />
murphy<br />
mike will do the beginning and end bits<br />
when to practice?<br />
everyone is free anytime after 12:30 on friday<br />
also erin will be there<br />
dillon will put it on the exec calendar<br />
(so tim might be there)<br />
(the polish guy got home)<br />
(or at least to germany)<br />
slide divisions<br />
murphy<br />
intro<br />
wands<br />
postview<br />
joe<br />
capture<br />
jail<br />
types of stuff<br />
the boring part<br />
<br />
timers<br />
on their way<br />
booklets and cheatsheets<br />
mike can do cheatsheets (probably on AFS)<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
GBGC<br />
whoop whoop<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Movie Night (thanksgiving)<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
12/4 find the event<br />
we should start planning next week<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
credit card training<br />
joe did the thing<br />
we have one reserved<br />
joe will collect it and then we turn it back in on monday<br />
he'll hold onto it when he's judging<br />
<br />
karaoke?<br />
sometimes awkward<br />
length limit (4 verses?)<br />
lots of old people?<br />
will discuss again after next semester<br />
<br />
booth inspection<br />
was canceled???<br />
it's happening next week<br />
<br />
more shirts<br />
order form is up<br />
when should we deadline it?<br />
repost after ctfws<br />
deadline is tuesday at 6<br />
remind people at monday's meeting<br />
we're ordering next wednesday<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151202&diff=7925MinutesExec201512022016-04-27T19:05:09Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a what<br />
[skye turned off the lights]<br />
why is photos<br />
had a 24 hours<br />
actually slept last night<br />
tried hard to be nocturnal last week and only somewhat succeeded<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a 24 hours<br />
is really sick<br />
yep<br />
really sick<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
weekend or day what<br />
hasn't done shit<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
ed got a new phone so erin got a less new phone<br />
capstone group strug<br />
going to lab at 9:30<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day and also a week<br />
didn't get a break during thanksgiving so GAVE UP on tuesday<br />
jessica jones<br />
check please<br />
no work not ever<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a 24 hours<br />
had to send a survey to justify getting the stuco he's teaching getting funded<br />
slept<br />
homework<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
doesn't even know, man<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Find the Event<br />
7pm friday, start A18A<br />
getting people from room to room?<br />
phones or voices, dillon will let us know<br />
we've reserved all the rooms EXCEPT gates<br />
we will act<br />
"i'm good at lying" says mike<br />
start room: zora<br />
job is to get people into teams<br />
3 or 4, up to 5<br />
split up teams of 6<br />
send people to alternating rooms<br />
consult the googledoc<br />
write the room on their paper<br />
flavor text<br />
the aliens are invading and they need our help<br />
each event will have a piece of the spaceship, and people can put them together<br />
if they fail an event they get a spaceship piece with an X on it--so they can build a spaceship, but only a broken one<br />
six pieces of space ship, zora gives them one to start<br />
erin: collaborative point a to point b<br />
carpet square puzzle--floor is lava style<br />
we've got carpet squares in the kage<br />
murphy: egg drop<br />
we have to help the aliens land<br />
murphy is figuring out supplies that he'll need<br />
both he and dillon will go shopping<br />
time limit: 10 minutes?<br />
joe: doodle war<br />
start off with drawn scenario, then draw something that sabatoges the other person's scenario<br />
repeat until something<br />
joe will work against the team<br />
5 minute time limit, then declare the "winner"<br />
...?<br />
people can't really lose<br />
joe gets the body of the ship<br />
dillon: labyrinth<br />
two layer maze<br />
two players have different layers and have to guide the third player through<br />
good to get people to crouch or stand as they go through different layers<br />
giving them coordinates on the sides would be helpful<br />
skye and mike: georgie<br />
make a smore with marshmallow fluff<br />
flavortext: mike is an android that needs to learn to take directions<br />
ingredients:<br />
smores<br />
hersheys<br />
marshmallow fluff<br />
hype<br />
dillon will make event<br />
erin will send email<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
trivia night<br />
skye is working on the ANSWERS, and then she'll write the actual questions<br />
there's a googledoc<br />
people need to helpppppp skye write questions<br />
how it works<br />
we do rounds of five questions at a time<br />
people write down their answers as we go<br />
scored on correctness after the round<br />
not playing<br />
erin will do cats<br />
mike will do comics<br />
<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Geek Eat<br />
WEDNESDAY OF THAT WEEK, announce at kgb<br />
deadline for RSVP (in writing!) by the event on friday<br />
need to call like riiiiight now<br />
aim for 6, if they do the two hour window thing, get 6<br />
we want to order off the menu, not get a group thing<br />
reserve for 30, we'll reduce it when we get the final number on friday<br />
bussin<br />
catch the 53d on craig<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
NOPE<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
booth<br />
inspection happened<br />
they want us to throw out our respirator<br />
we gotta document our chemicals better presumably<br />
enter them on chem tracker<br />
they don't like our cups of paint taped shut<br />
we probably don't have to buy anything<br />
progress report<br />
everything is going according to schedule<br />
they'll have the plans ready for the deadline<br />
<br />
exec time for spring<br />
erin will post a when2meet<br />
<br />
assassins<br />
moved to spring semester because skye is ill!<br />
<br />
realtalk<br />
making a when2meet<br />
<br />
shirts<br />
we can use "Carnegie Mellon University" in the same typeface as KGB if we swap the slogan<br />
which is weird and not preferable<br />
murphy should make all the images and meet with jay<br />
zora will be part of this meeting<br />
he's out of the office the week of dec 7 so we'll meet the week of finals, for distribution next semester<br />
poll<br />
gotta figure the slogan out<br />
post for suggestions<br />
we'll vote quick at the meeting on monday<br />
<br />
star wars viewing during break?<br />
machete order<br />
murphy's in charge<br />
announce it on monday<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20151209&diff=7924MinutesExec201512092016-04-27T19:04:53Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
had a weekend. two days. shit happened.<br />
<br />
skye<br />
sakgjdlkg<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
has an assignment for a class<br />
needs a super high grade for an A<br />
OR could get a zero and get a B<br />
(has elected the second option)<br />
BUT needs to just. get it in.<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
gave a shitty presentation, it's okay<br />
had a friendship emergency<br />
something in the middle<br />
practiced lighting<br />
appropriately trashy<br />
is on 2 advil, let's see if that will go up<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
oh my god<br />
glad they did the important shit before 4pm<br />
<br />
joe<br />
isn't here<br />
had a DAY<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
wasn't terrible!! we are all excited!!<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
trivia<br />
skye will do tomorrow at 12:30<br />
murphy's getting star* trivia in<br />
erin is doing cats<br />
but will not be there<br />
mike will write comics questions also<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
geek eat<br />
can't make reservations at normal time<br />
we sent out a poll to people who have already rsvp'd<br />
we're leaning towards 1 (people ahve responded thusly)<br />
gotta get the word out once we make a decision<br />
facebook<br />
bridge<br />
erin will send an email<br />
dillon will make the reservation first thing tomorrow<br />
if anyone sends an rsvp betwen now and midnight, zora will deal with it<br />
announce time and info on monday at meeting<br />
we've got 21 people already, reservation needs to be for 30<br />
<br />
FUTURE<br />
over break<br />
rules? ctfws? hvz?<br />
events?<br />
we're going to deal with it first exec next semester<br />
first is potluck, that's routine<br />
dillon is trying to reserve the room<br />
<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
first meeting next semester<br />
mike MIGHT not be there (unlikely, but still)<br />
<br />
bioraft<br />
we might all have to go to fire safety training???<br />
we might not<br />
we'll find out<br />
finish the new bioraft training<br />
<br />
exec meeting<br />
erin has sent out the form<br />
technically not active????<br />
but we're second in line<br />
or something<br />
erin will check in when form goes live<br />
<br />
shirts<br />
we're good to go with the design<br />
zora will prep everything 100% over the weekend<br />
place to order from?<br />
lightbrothers?<br />
$12 for each shirt, $24.50 for sweatshirts<br />
prices are gonna be hard--this is more expensive than commonwealth<br />
mike and murphy will meet to find a place on friday<br />
<br />
booth<br />
skye will poke booth chairs<br />
tool training is the second event, they gotta be at exec first time next semester<br />
they also need to get their plans in<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160113&diff=7923MinutesExec201601132016-04-27T15:47:58Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
had a day<br />
two days, actually.<br />
getting up early sucks<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a day<br />
terrifyingly eventful<br />
things happened<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
timespan?<br />
two of his classes are on craig street<br />
it's unfortunate<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
started with quotes from a professor<br />
they know these two crystal structures aren't the same<br />
but if you squint really hard they look the same<br />
so they're the same<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
like their thesis advisor a lot<br />
<br />
joe<br />
nope<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
had never seen a diagram of the ear before<br />
now has seen two<br />
also has a cold<br />
<br />
HOUSEKEEPING<br />
general meetings<br />
no hands/hands voting<br />
(mike had surgery and can't do stuff though so it's a work in progress)<br />
exec meeting times<br />
we're moving exec ten minutes back to 4:40<br />
we need to announce it to the general body but that can just happen with the room announcement<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Potluck<br />
we're in A18*<br />
dillon needs to post to the general group<br />
and put the info on the bridge<br />
erin will send out an email because it's the first meeting of the semester<br />
food<br />
exec: please bring meal like objects<br />
we provide drinks<br />
stuff from office<br />
utensils<br />
plates/bowls<br />
napkins<br />
condiments?<br />
board games<br />
murphy will help dillon bring stuff from office<br />
<br />
EVENT SCHEDULE<br />
1/15: Potluck<br />
1/22: Tool Training<br />
1/29: Useless People Auction<br />
2/05: Falls on its Ass (Acts Its Age for a contingency)<br />
mike won't be there, erin doesn't skate (it's a whole thing)<br />
2/12: Bitterness Party<br />
2/19: CtFwS / Video Game Night<br />
2/26: CtFwS / Video Game Night<br />
3/04: Spring Break (Movie Night)<br />
3/11: Spring Break (no event)<br />
3/18: Improv / Karaoke<br />
3/25: Improv / Karaoke<br />
4/01: GBGC...and come up with a joke. make it weird.<br />
4/08: Move On<br />
4/16: Defector's Party<br />
4/22: USA<br />
4/29: LDOC<br />
5/04: Mafia Night<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
tool training<br />
they should be good to go<br />
they'll figure out what needs to happen to which flats before the event<br />
<br />
BOOTH CHAIR REPORT<br />
hype<br />
posters<br />
scared of wood posters<br />
skye or mike need to send them<br />
rush posters<br />
zora had a monologue<br />
picking builds<br />
booth chairs find times amongst themselves first<br />
then send out a poll<br />
they'll be able to announce the time at tool training<br />
<br />
ACTIVITIES FAIR<br />
4:30 to 6:30, Wednesday the 20th<br />
We're moving exec to 4:30 on THURSDAY<br />
request for Porter A20A<br />
people who will be there at the beginning<br />
erin<br />
mike<br />
skye<br />
people who can be there at the end<br />
joe<br />
zora<br />
erin<br />
skye<br />
mike will check in<br />
erin and skye will get stuff<br />
zora and joe will clean up<br />
every one else be there in the middle<br />
office stuff<br />
hats<br />
zora will show murphy and joe how to edit them<br />
skye will print them<br />
(start with a hundred, we'll have to print more)<br />
booth trophys<br />
nerf gun<br />
sign<br />
the other hats<br />
apparently we have a top hat in the UC mailbox<br />
caution tape<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
UPA<br />
dillon is reserving breed hall or A14 or 1212<br />
we need to ask for submissions or whatever on monday<br />
people will email erin if they're uncomfortable with a certain person bidding on them<br />
if they're not comfy with erin, they can talk to any of exec<br />
erin will coordinate finding someone to outbid on them<br />
contract<br />
in AFS space<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
shirts<br />
we have everything, murphy will order today<br />
he just needs to make the design on the website today<br />
part of that is staring at people's clothing<br />
it's not weird<br />
gotta talk to joe about treasury<br />
assassins<br />
skye is figuring it out<br />
we'll be updated when she figures shit out<br />
story revising<br />
should announce it at monday's meeting<br />
have people email murphy or skye<br />
once you have interest, find a meeting time<br />
then have a meeting<br />
ctfws<br />
joe will organize a meeting<br />
sledding?<br />
murphy can plan!<br />
it'd be an unofficial event<br />
we have sleds, and trays, and zora has HELLA BOXES<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160121&diff=7922MinutesExec201601212016-04-27T15:47:46Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
magnesium sulfate breaks glass<br />
don't fuck up<br />
mike hopes to have not fucked up<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a couple days<br />
long and arduous<br />
today the senate passed an ordinance that says they won't arrest people for sledding on their side of the capitol<br />
cory booker wanted to go sledding<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
things<br />
whatever<br />
has a position in another club<br />
he's the thing<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
had one class and it was really short<br />
meg got a giant poster printer<br />
IT WAS AN ADVENTURE<br />
meg had to hold onto it from outside the car on her solo wheel<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
siiiiiiiiiiick<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a day<br />
sent the emails he's had to send for the past 3 weeks<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
forgot that one of his classes existed<br />
morning class was cancelled<br />
just FORGOT his next class<br />
went to physics (whoops)<br />
<br />
EXEC STUFF<br />
technically exec time is moving to 4:40 on Wednesday<br />
erin will announce after monday meeting<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Tool Training<br />
when & where?<br />
7:00 friday<br />
in the kage<br />
dillon made a map<br />
it's beautiful<br />
we can maybe put it by the elevator in stever<br />
food?<br />
dillon is getting regular amounts of food this week<br />
kage restock is next week or something<br />
(dillon hasn't had time)<br />
people start showing up between 7:00 and 7:30<br />
zora will be there for the first hour, then might ditch if they're still super sick<br />
dillon and skye also need to be there to help train<br />
dillon can be there for the first 2.5 hours<br />
joe'll be around (can help train chopsaw)<br />
mike might need to be running in and out<br />
game plan?<br />
booth chairs'll get there an hour early and make a final plan<br />
and make it pretty<br />
the cart???<br />
it might be weird<br />
we used it for advertising<br />
it should be fine<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
hype<br />
poster this weekend?<br />
also throughout next week<br />
they have scared of wood, the rush poster is....somewhere<br />
builds<br />
construction on saturday<br />
art on sunday<br />
both are in the kage now<br />
both should be on the posters<br />
trucks?<br />
booth is FAR<br />
we need to reserve a truck RIGHT NOW<br />
for move on<br />
we'll deal with teardown<br />
we also need someone to DRIVE the truck<br />
that's a booth chair problem<br />
maybe ed???<br />
exec'll reserve, hand off info to booth chair<br />
trips?<br />
this year they allow truck trips on saturday and sunday<br />
but not twice on moveon<br />
price<br />
$29.99 for a 15ft tuck for 24 hours<br />
(plus $.99 per mile)<br />
(plus $14 for insurance because ahahahaha booth)<br />
(plus $1 environmental???)<br />
pickup time?<br />
2:00 friday<br />
gotta do something with the dang truck<br />
dropoff time?<br />
2:00 saturday<br />
doesn't hurt to drop it off earlier, doesn't hurt to have it saturday morning<br />
dillon reserves the thing<br />
activities fair<br />
we got emails!<br />
for kgb/ctfws list AND booth<br />
erin:<br />
send out after activities fair email to the booth people<br />
link them to the facebook groups<br />
remind about tool training<br />
after that, booth chairs<br />
post on both groups all the time for builds/meetings<br />
send emails sometimes<br />
shirts!<br />
do the thing like, now<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Useless People Auction<br />
where when<br />
7:00 friday breed hall<br />
positng<br />
dillon needs to do the thing<br />
erin needs to send the email to the members list<br />
saturday during the day!<br />
info about email, blurb, erin, event, etc<br />
what if few people<br />
we generally have more people actually auction themselves off than respond<br />
also we can ham it up<br />
should still ping old exec to get numbers<br />
murphy found the contract<br />
someone gotta print it<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
falls on it's ass<br />
generally we go during free skate<br />
7:00 to 9:00<br />
so we should leave the black chairs at like...earlier<br />
prices<br />
$5 for admission, $3 for skates?<br />
we need to post about prices, when we leave, etc<br />
we gotta reserve a room for fallthrough<br />
food?<br />
normal food + hot chocolate<br />
zora will bring the kettle<br />
<br />
OTHER THINGS<br />
shirts payment<br />
murphy did the card thing<br />
gotta reimburse<br />
do that thing<br />
confer with joe<br />
assassins checkin<br />
postering this saturday<br />
maybe coordinate with booth chairs<br />
working on player cards<br />
tell campus police<br />
dillon make an assassins@ email address<br />
spoons in office<br />
set up a tarp outside<br />
zombies (next exec)<br />
nomcom thing<br />
the petition was invalid<br />
it hella passed though (like, 30 to 2)<br />
unanimous exec vote to go with it<br />
we'll be better next time<br />
good god<br />
dillon and erin will 100% update the bylaws<br />
actual nomcom<br />
zora and mike and dillon want to be on nomcom (A++)<br />
lmao only one of us can do it<br />
we gotta announce on monday<br />
get people to email us by next wednesday<br />
we can decide thenabouts<br />
OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
magnesium sulfate breaks glass<br />
don't fuck up<br />
mike hopes to have not fucked up<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a couple days<br />
long and arduous<br />
today the senate passed an ordinance that says they won't arrest people for sledding on their side of the capitol<br />
cory booker wanted to go sledding<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
things<br />
whatever<br />
has a position in another club<br />
he's the thing<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
had one class and it was really short<br />
meg got a giant poster printer<br />
IT WAS AN ADVENTURE<br />
meg had to hold onto it from outside the car on her solo wheel<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
siiiiiiiiiiick<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a day<br />
sent the emails he's had to send for the past 3 weeks<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
forgot that one of his classes existed<br />
morning class was cancelled<br />
just FORGOT his next class<br />
went to physics (whoops)<br />
<br />
EXEC STUFF<br />
technically exec time is moving to 4:40 on Wednesday<br />
erin will announce after monday meeting<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Tool Training<br />
when & where?<br />
7:00 friday<br />
in the kage<br />
dillon made a map<br />
it's beautiful<br />
we can maybe put it by the elevator in stever<br />
food?<br />
dillon is getting regular amounts of food this week<br />
kage restock is next week or something<br />
(dillon hasn't had time)<br />
people start showing up between 7:00 and 7:30<br />
zora will be there for the first hour, then might ditch if they're still super sick<br />
dillon and skye also need to be there to help train<br />
dillon can be there for the first 2.5 hours<br />
joe'll be around (can help train chopsaw)<br />
mike might need to be running in and out<br />
game plan?<br />
booth chairs'll get there an hour early and make a final plan<br />
and make it pretty<br />
the cart???<br />
it might be weird<br />
we used it for advertising<br />
it should be fine<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
hype<br />
poster this weekend?<br />
also throughout next week<br />
they have scared of wood, the rush poster is....somewhere<br />
builds<br />
construction on saturday<br />
art on sunday<br />
both are in the kage now<br />
both should be on the posters<br />
trucks?<br />
booth is FAR<br />
we need to reserve a truck RIGHT NOW<br />
for move on<br />
we'll deal with teardown<br />
we also need someone to DRIVE the truck<br />
that's a booth chair problem<br />
maybe ed???<br />
exec'll reserve, hand off info to booth chair<br />
trips?<br />
this year they allow truck trips on saturday and sunday<br />
but not twice on moveon<br />
price<br />
$29.99 for a 15ft tuck for 24 hours<br />
(plus $.99 per mile)<br />
(plus $14 for insurance because ahahahaha booth)<br />
(plus $1 environmental???)<br />
pickup time?<br />
2:00 friday<br />
gotta do something with the dang truck<br />
dropoff time?<br />
2:00 saturday<br />
doesn't hurt to drop it off earlier, doesn't hurt to have it saturday morning<br />
dillon reserves the thing<br />
activities fair<br />
we got emails!<br />
for kgb/ctfws list AND booth<br />
erin:<br />
send out after activities fair email to the booth people<br />
link them to the facebook groups<br />
remind about tool training<br />
after that, booth chairs<br />
post on both groups all the time for builds/meetings<br />
send emails sometimes<br />
shirts!<br />
do the thing like, now<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Useless People Auction<br />
where when<br />
7:00 friday breed hall<br />
positng<br />
dillon needs to do the thing<br />
erin needs to send the email to the members list<br />
saturday during the day!<br />
info about email, blurb, erin, event, etc<br />
what if few people<br />
we generally have more people actually auction themselves off than respond<br />
also we can ham it up<br />
should still ping old exec to get numbers<br />
murphy found the contract<br />
someone gotta print it<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
falls on it's ass<br />
generally we go during free skate<br />
7:00 to 9:00<br />
so we should leave the black chairs at like...earlier<br />
prices<br />
$5 for admission, $3 for skates?<br />
we need to post about prices, when we leave, etc<br />
we gotta reserve a room for fallthrough<br />
food?<br />
normal food + hot chocolate<br />
zora will bring the kettle<br />
<br />
OTHER THINGS<br />
shirts payment<br />
murphy did the card thing<br />
gotta reimburse<br />
do that thing<br />
confer with joe<br />
assassins checkin<br />
postering this saturday<br />
maybe coordinate with booth chairs<br />
working on player cards<br />
tell campus police<br />
dillon make an assassins@ email address<br />
spoons in office<br />
set up a tarp outside<br />
zombies (next exec)<br />
nomcom thing<br />
the petition was invalid<br />
it hella passed though (like, 30 to 2)<br />
unanimous exec vote to go with it<br />
we'll be better next time<br />
good god<br />
dillon and erin will 100% update the bylaws<br />
actual nomcom<br />
zora and mike and dillon want to be on nomcom (A++)<br />
lmao only one of us can do it<br />
it dillon<br />
we gotta announce on monday<br />
get people to email us by next wednesday<br />
we can decide thenabouts<br />
<br />
ERIN TAKES NOTES:<br />
story revising <br />
murphy sent out messages<br />
its happen<br />
but murphy isnt the hype machine<br />
<br />
ctfws 19th<br />
its happen<br />
we booked a lot of rooms<br />
i had a bunch of stuff open so i missed taking notes<br />
sucks<br />
we have reservations in for many rooms but waiting on actual confirmations<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160127&diff=7921MinutesExec201601272016-04-27T15:47:30Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
slept for 48 hours<br />
was an adult today<br />
bills make zero sense<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a day<br />
not enough sleep<br />
too much math<br />
tepper class???<br />
the prof crashed his comp<br />
he was warned<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
day<br />
still sick<br />
blowy nose every 30 minutes<br />
his words<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
exciting learning<br />
also cookies<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
is the poster monkey<br />
go to the anti-gender-based violence stuff re: tartanhacks<br />
google "beyond the binary cmu hackathon"<br />
<br />
joe<br />
has a mouthful of meringue<br />
highlight of his day<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
all of his classes were cancelled<br />
he can't hear things<br />
it's. weird.<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
UPA<br />
7:00 friday breed hall<br />
we have 10 people!<br />
we need to print the contracts<br />
keeping track?<br />
dillon and zora<br />
(joe will be auctioning people off)<br />
important: don't insult the person<br />
if you wanna make a dig, check first<br />
credit card stuff<br />
it is reserved<br />
joe will pick it up bw 4 and 4:30 and return it mon morning<br />
joe and erin are authorized to use it<br />
dress fancy<br />
dillon will post reminder thurs night<br />
dillon will post about merch and credit card terminal in the event<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
they "tool timed"<br />
(tool training)<br />
built all but two flats that need to be built from scratch<br />
art meeting on sunday with booth chairs and zora<br />
meta planning<br />
hype<br />
posters are up<br />
dylan has been posting<br />
dylan will send an email<br />
craig will make sure he does<br />
home depot<br />
craig went<br />
(allocation has been made)<br />
shirt<br />
maddy is do thing<br />
two colors (shirt color + one dye color)?<br />
customink might have a thing to order???<br />
murphy will look into it<br />
actual tool training<br />
always TRAIN people<br />
even if they say they know how to do the thing<br />
and make sure that all the booth chairs are trained<br />
<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
falls on its ass<br />
rates<br />
$5 admission<br />
$3 for skates<br />
timing<br />
leave black chairs at 6:30?<br />
it's a 30ish minute walk<br />
the place opens at 7:00<br />
there's an inside thing so we can wait<br />
what about PPG<br />
it's bus, not quite as escapable<br />
technically less walking<br />
more expensive<br />
nah<br />
if the weather's bad we just stay in and have gbgc<br />
announce at 3:00ish<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
2/12 is bitterness<br />
get candy, whatevs<br />
people can bring video games<br />
<br />
ASSASSINS<br />
2/7 - 2/12<br />
ends around 6 on friday<br />
the ducks have arrived<br />
skye will post in the main group<br />
...already posted in other groups<br />
spoons are nearly ready<br />
skye will email campus police<br />
dillon made the assassins@ email, it's forwarding to skye<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
monday meeting<br />
skye ran the meeting<br />
concerns:<br />
making the same motion twice<br />
basically, no repeats immediately<br />
chair just says dilatory<br />
end discussion earlier<br />
like, just end it when it dies down<br />
tabling<br />
things have been untabling partway through the meeting<br />
time to stop that now<br />
just have everything untable immediately at the beginning<br />
also: dilatory tabling more<br />
this year's bugmars<br />
we can actually ask people to make different jokes at the beginning of the meeting<br />
hurtful voting<br />
no violence not funny<br />
no like actually<br />
laugh at x really doesn't work<br />
also check with them<br />
procedural<br />
we vote hands/hands for non-committee-passing deals<br />
(go ham for committee passing only)<br />
manipulate the voting!!! obvious majority to pass, unless you don't want the thing<br />
like, sorry, members, this is humor theory<br />
<br />
nomcom itself<br />
erin will post tonight on facebook<br />
ask for people to email exec<br />
also if people are curious about exec or how to be a voting member: just ask us<br />
dillon is chair<br />
<br />
zombies<br />
happening in march<br />
will poster in february<br />
skye has mods<br />
<br />
shirts<br />
they're here!<br />
most people picked up their shirts<br />
the spreadsheet for the order form is in the kgb folder<br />
(green is paid, red is rejected???)<br />
should bring shirts to UPA<br />
carrying??<br />
murphy needs hands<br />
erin can do<br />
worst case scenario, two trips<br />
tim is best (also has arms)<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
ctfws 2/19<br />
postering will happen next week<br />
we'll worry about counting stuff not this week<br />
rules stuff<br />
joe will work on it?<br />
we might play with whether or not we revert to doc oc<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160203&diff=7920MinutesExec201602032016-04-27T15:47:15Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a two days<br />
spent most of today screaming about anime or hamilton<br />
entire twitter feed is blond anime boys<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a day. days.<br />
time has passed<br />
is melting under paperwork<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a day<br />
running meeting to meeting<br />
meetings until 11<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
discovered that roberts 2 connects to hamerschlag f<br />
that cuts like 4 minutes off her commute<br />
either warm coffee or alcohol broke her buttercream<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
930 pounds of books???<br />
hella fucked up about reality and adulthood yo<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a couple days<br />
just dropped a course<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
overslept (woke up right before the meeting)<br />
fucked up sleep schedule!!<br />
woke up and had a lot of feelings about star wars<br />
also about his career<br />
<br />
let the record show that tim has had a day as well<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
KGB Falls On Its Ass<br />
$8 total. we've talked about this<br />
mike won't be there, dillon is in charge<br />
dillon is also buying hot chocolate<br />
there will be hot water<br />
weather?<br />
right now it looks great<br />
leaving 6:30, (really 6:35ish)<br />
we should post a reminder day-of<br />
pathfinding?<br />
murphy can do that thing<br />
he can also check to see if it's likely to be open<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
went to construction junction yesterday!<br />
bought wallpaper<br />
hype<br />
posters are up<br />
they're gonna do another round in a week or so<br />
posting is good<br />
shirts<br />
maddy is doing thing<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Bitterness Party<br />
gbgc<br />
get candy<br />
wear a costume????<br />
mike fucked up then zora fucked up and now i guess we're doing this<br />
"find your perfect ghoul"<br />
<br />
ASSASSINS<br />
police<br />
skye emailed them<br />
they said "fine." like, verbatim<br />
skye may also call<br />
"the weapon is spoon, your life is a duck"<br />
posting<br />
do it a LOT<br />
event<br />
for the first meeting<br />
post in the kgb group<br />
skye needs to hook exec into the groupme that's the central communication for the game<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
CtFwS<br />
judges<br />
we've had some people email!<br />
we'll announce again on monday<br />
then figure out a time for the week of<br />
rules<br />
they polled the chat, but either way there should be an actual meeting<br />
BEFORE next week<br />
joe will announce the changes, if any, at next exec<br />
otherwise we use the rules from last semester<br />
postering<br />
get hype<br />
happening this weekend<br />
joe will update posters<br />
other posters go up later<br />
posters will to to residence halls before friday<br />
Fence<br />
start no later than tuesday<br />
monday was hard<br />
skye and murphy will be in charge<br />
shirt reprint?<br />
we were out of the playerstate graph and we were missing sizes<br />
there was some demand<br />
but, it's an investment and we already did shirt stuff this semester<br />
better to wait so cashflow works better<br />
can do next semester with new exec<br />
posting<br />
dillon will post to all groups<br />
erin will send emails NEXT week<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
nomcom<br />
current emails<br />
ed<br />
sam<br />
dillon<br />
we need one more<br />
announce it again on monday<br />
members of nomcom have to be voting members<br />
SAM NEEDS TO PAY HIS DUES<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
LDOC<br />
farpark reserve<br />
allocation from exec discretionary fund for $75 to do the thing<br />
murphy is doing the thing<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
challenge coins<br />
this isn't a challenge<br />
skye CHALLENGES<br />
mike and erin lose<br />
anyway dillon has a spare challenge coin, we can buy it off him<br />
we'll deal with money stuff and jokes later<br />
possibly in meeting<br />
<br />
zombies<br />
march 20 - 25<br />
we'll talk about this later<br />
<br />
stories<br />
not many people showed up to the meeting<br />
it's gonna be manditory for old and new exec after elections<br />
also ed<br />
optional for anyone else<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160210&diff=7919MinutesExec201602102016-04-27T15:46:10Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a day<br />
finished an undertale lets play<br />
is emotionally compromised<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a day<br />
statistics<br />
and then the phrase "that's statistics!"<br />
it's fine until skye gets sick of it<br />
...she should avoid cluster<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a day<br />
has been continuously really excited about the sentinels kickstarter<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
got an email canceling morning class<br />
but no. physics.<br />
but made cookies!<br />
exam at 6:30<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
the future is real and everything is terrible<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a day<br />
oh my god oh my god oh my god blah<br />
exam at 1:30, giant homework due midnight, assignments due friday<br />
so he's dying<br />
on the plus side, they got things done in the ctfws rules meeting<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
murphy's mundane superpower is a complete inability to care about everything in the future<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Bitterness Party<br />
7:00, Friday, PH A18*<br />
we can just bring mask making things to the place<br />
construction paper and markers for "i tolerate you" cards<br />
also that weird foam shit and scissors<br />
string and pipe cleaners<br />
fb event is go, bridge will happen soon<br />
candy<br />
dillon'll get it<br />
get stuff with nooooo peanuts anywhere near it<br />
<br />
ASSASSINS<br />
it's going well<br />
boomerang crashes a lot<br />
there's only been one rules dispute in 3 days<br />
player reports going well<br />
people have been asking about the ducks<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
low build turnouts<br />
average 3 or 4 people, including booth chairs<br />
time to publically shame the email list<br />
third build time<br />
probably thurs at 6:30<br />
it's okay to announce that there is no one at builds<br />
recruitment<br />
the people from the activities fair?<br />
we can address them specifically through the booth mailing list<br />
shirt<br />
it'll be done soon<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
CtFwS<br />
costco<br />
mike and dillon will figure it out<br />
gatorade and snacks yo<br />
judges<br />
we have a list<br />
12 people!<br />
dillon will post one more time to the kgb group (now)<br />
can send out when2meet now<br />
and send it to other people who email in later<br />
judges meeting times announced on saturday<br />
also gotta pick a second to run the meetings<br />
rules presentation<br />
mike, joe, murphy<br />
they should practice<br />
also we're possibly adding a tips slide<br />
postering<br />
murphy sent them to the student activities people<br />
murphy will change the other posters<br />
if he can't, tell us sooner rather than later<br />
posting on different facebook pages<br />
i.e. class of 201x pages<br />
erin will also send out an email about the new room to the alumni<br />
fence<br />
steelhacks want thing<br />
but after ctfws and...after steelhacks?<br />
also all they want is to dump rice pilaf all over it<br />
wow they're fucked<br />
we want it tuesday or wednesday<br />
skye confinced the donner housefellow NOT to take it<br />
it may rain<br />
we will not take the fence if it rains<br />
we'll bring out minifence<br />
people<br />
skye has a shortlist, and will collect more people over the weekend<br />
mike will copy the spreadsheet over and send it over on saturday<br />
paint<br />
ohhhh candyapple red color problems<br />
we need to inventory<br />
craig will do it when he goes by the kage today<br />
we need two full cans of red, one full can of yellow<br />
more if it's cold<br />
HAVE three<br />
fun stuff<br />
DJing<br />
maybe thursday!<br />
if it's not raining<br />
harry is the best<br />
hot chocolate?<br />
s'mores?<br />
rules meeting<br />
summary<br />
scott hall is completely out of bounds<br />
blue belt no longer has a timer<br />
there'll be a tips thing at the end of the presentation<br />
they're gonna have a review meeting monday after ctfws<br />
there are some tweaks they did<br />
timers are out of the rules, but they can stay on the belts<br />
(people can choose whether or not to use them to count)<br />
we can make the edits by just crossing stuff out in the paper handbooks<br />
and there are some more that they'll have to do (copyediting stuff)<br />
we're planning to start out with more flags to increase game length too<br />
we're gonna keep flagstate hidden<br />
dillon's making a bridge event<br />
walkthrough starts at 5:30<br />
<br />
NOMCOM<br />
do we have 4 people?<br />
dillon<br />
ed<br />
tim<br />
sam?<br />
only if he becomes a member<br />
skye will message mari just in case<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
LDOC<br />
we got farpark!<br />
or at least we got a reimbursement<br />
murphy needs to be reimbursed<br />
<br />
zombies<br />
postering the weekend after ctfws<br />
maybe not gonna do that if it's snowing though<br />
they've got a set of mods, the list of which i've missed<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160217&diff=7918MinutesExec201602172016-04-27T15:45:44Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
pile of sick<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a couple days<br />
pile of statistics<br />
THREE MIDTERMS AND A PROJECT CHECKPOINT TOMORROW<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
food<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
found a nice new rabbit hole and promptly fell into it<br />
two hamilton folk are cmu alums<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
SPUTTERS<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a day<br />
things are a lot easier with fewer classes<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a day<br />
hair hamilton having no motivation<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
is slightly recovered<br />
had a day<br />
<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
CtFwS<br />
judges meeting<br />
one last night at 8:30<br />
one tomorrow at 8:00<br />
we need zora, frieder, and mike at that one<br />
presentation<br />
mike's voice is gonna be gone<br />
we need a new person<br />
gonna ask frieder<br />
zora's the backup<br />
we'll meet after the judges meeting<br />
hype<br />
posters are up<br />
posting on facebook<br />
gonna happen today<br />
post everywhere<br />
fence<br />
someone else has it<br />
we're doing minifence<br />
skye and murphy are in charge of getting minifence together<br />
gotta update it via paint in the kage<br />
they can delegate<br />
craig is doing it!<br />
party?<br />
maybe party<br />
maybe not<br />
we'll see<br />
they have a grill (it is not FMS's grill)<br />
presentation update<br />
joe is drafting tonight<br />
joe and tim are finalizing it before 8pm tomorrow<br />
head judges<br />
in order<br />
joe<br />
erin<br />
sam<br />
dillon<br />
yay!<br />
new posting materials<br />
mike is gonna pick up the posterboard<br />
zora FORGOT TO GET THE GLYPHS they'll get them from fedex after the meeting<br />
post-game review<br />
joe is reserving the room now<br />
food<br />
all in the office<br />
they got it yesterday<br />
also there's a blingee<br />
walkthrough<br />
exec, meet at the office at 4:50 to carry stuff over<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
dylan has moved to asking people to show up<br />
also new build thursdays at 6:40<br />
posters<br />
time to redo that<br />
also need to add the two new build times<br />
shirts<br />
haven't heard from maddy in a while<br />
we're gonna say the absolute deadline for the shirts is the monday of spring break<br />
start orders that day, reannounce at the first meeting back, have final order numbers on wednesday<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
video game night<br />
someone brinng quiplash<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
spring break!<br />
whoever's here will run the movie night<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
nomcom<br />
they'll meet, their plan is to open nominations next monday<br />
<br />
bottlecaps<br />
there's an ENTIRE new side of wean that's exposed to scott hall<br />
also scott hall is open!! floors 5 and 6<br />
<br />
saturday stuff<br />
artemis was fun<br />
like 12 people showed<br />
not conflicting with itr would be good in the future<br />
itr<br />
sam posted a poll, might happen on saturday<br />
might not<br />
murphy'll announce it<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160302&diff=7917MinutesExec201603022016-04-27T15:45:20Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had two days<br />
everything is due all the time and they don't care<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a two days<br />
exams are over but she still has to write<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a two days<br />
procrastinated by writing a twitterbot<br />
now...homework<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a two days<br />
sock madness started<br />
makin socks<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a two days<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a two days<br />
you know those days? he's been having them for like a week and a half straight<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a two days<br />
joes days are murphy's life<br />
has things due and a test in a class<br />
COULD do them and maybe drop the class<br />
or could just. drop the class.<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
movie night<br />
dillon can't set up<br />
mike? can?<br />
dillon is reserving a room and making the fb event<br />
going for breed hall<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
booth's good<br />
no builds over spring break<br />
build on thursday but it'll be weird<br />
craig's on it with the FMS stuff<br />
trainings?<br />
scaffold training got canceled<br />
they may or may not reschedule<br />
the rest are happening over spring break<br />
booth chairs need to remind EVERYONE in advance<br />
posters<br />
don't put stuff in nonlegal postering places<br />
shirts<br />
designs by march 1st<br />
we need those<br />
printing<br />
there is nooo info about logistics<br />
mike will pester maddy<br />
murphy has the order form made<br />
dillon is our shirt hookup<br />
process<br />
we're gonna do it the same up until the actual printing process<br />
so the order form will go out by the end of spring break<br />
schedule<br />
gotta haul ass on art<br />
sending spreadsheets to exec<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
improv/karaoke<br />
dillon has contacted NPP, has not heard back<br />
so probably karaoke?<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
zombies<br />
it's happening<br />
armbands are happening from joannes<br />
tabling<br />
skye will table<br />
people haven't been responding to reservations<br />
worse comes to worse we have a table<br />
start<br />
thing starts the week after we come back (march 20th)<br />
posters<br />
they're going up, some places aren't got yet<br />
they'll be got<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
nomcom<br />
met, started the thing<br />
the calendar is set<br />
they'll have deadlines, erin will have to make communications<br />
most aren't until april<br />
everything is happening<br />
proctors<br />
gotta pick by march 30th<br />
so we'll choose at next exec<br />
<br />
shirt?<br />
it got mailed<br />
murphy will get joe the money<br />
<br />
movin stuff<br />
sleds are going from the kage to the office<br />
nerf weapons are going to be better stored<br />
we need plastic tubs<br />
can get them in home depot<br />
$50 allocated<br />
<br />
defectors<br />
WE HAVE A GOOGLE+ PAGE<br />
anyway it's time to reserve a room<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160406&diff=7916MinutesExec201604062016-04-27T15:44:55Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>EXEC REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
is training a grad student in the lab<br />
it's awkward<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a couple days<br />
they were too long and too short at the same time<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
had a couple of days<br />
watched history of japan on youtube<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a day<br />
started with pretending to use a microscope so a prof could prove he's working with undergrads<br />
maybe? jobs?<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a day<br />
shipped 16 packages<br />
tomorrow 3<br />
that's their life now<br />
<br />
joe<br />
had a day<br />
is in the slow process of manufacturing a circadian rhythm for himself<br />
wrote up the rules of go in code<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
had a day<br />
listening to the mountain goats<br />
fb headphones SUCK<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
move on<br />
schedule<br />
2:00 pick up truck<br />
dillon and meg (maybe a third person to have extra truck driver)<br />
craig also<br />
3:00 booth chairs arrive<br />
we will dominate stever<br />
floor stuff going in the truck<br />
also wall flats<br />
all getting piled in the loading bay<br />
other piles of stuff we're gonna hand carry<br />
4:00 members start to show up<br />
hard hats<br />
skye's in charge<br />
5:45 packing should be done<br />
6:00 move on time<br />
release the truck<br />
release the hand carries<br />
a few people scurry over to help unload the truck immediately<br />
exec will be there to help if necessary<br />
dillon needs to buy soda, but not extra snacks<br />
pizza<br />
skye and mike will handle it<br />
call after the truck leaves<br />
other booth stuff<br />
posting<br />
spam all the channels<br />
erin will poke at the alumni<br />
build week times<br />
11pm to 11am probably<br />
booth chairs get there early and leave late<br />
good luck kids<br />
watch shifts<br />
we're good on those<br />
dylan's in charge of communicating to people who are signed up the day before<br />
shirts<br />
maddy is making them tomorrow after 11:30am<br />
help is good<br />
we have one extra in every size<br />
first aid kit<br />
we have two<br />
at least one of them is stocked<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
buggy shirts<br />
murphy put in the order<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
defector's party<br />
real time: 2:30 - 5:30, stever dining room<br />
exec time: 1:30 - 6:00<br />
setup<br />
stuff<br />
2x12 for the signing<br />
shirts<br />
bring<br />
sell for $5<br />
food<br />
mike and dillon ordered a cake<br />
pickup is 1<br />
jim jams<br />
order it next week<br />
chips n drinks<br />
mike and dillon will get at costco<br />
emailing<br />
erin should email now again<br />
or this weekend<br />
soon<br />
<br />
ANNUAL MEETING<br />
communication<br />
make a post with all the scheduling<br />
dues deadline<br />
platforms due<br />
the actual meeting<br />
exec:<br />
edit the handbook for your positions before the meeting<br />
email candidates with a general job description<br />
transition meeting<br />
after elections, mike will send out a when2meet<br />
we'll try to have an hour long meeting with everybody<br />
things transfer over immediately upon election<br />
the old treasurer needs to make an anouncement about the state of the treasury<br />
the new treasurer<br />
needs to make the allocation to replenish the discretionary fund<br />
motions to set dues<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
USA<br />
it's our job to reserve a table and a room<br />
dillon is doing that now<br />
2315<br />
and a credit card thing<br />
it's new exec's job, butt out<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
article 9<br />
updating stuff (it's up to murphy)<br />
github<br />
wiki<br />
bridge<br />
dropbox<br />
website?<br />
afs<br />
notifications<br />
zora will send an email once murphy's done the updates<br />
typo<br />
there's a sentence fragment that means nothing<br />
the future membership can deal with it<br />
future changes<br />
people in the body want to<br />
they can! it can be their problem<br />
it's not exec's job<br />
handbook stuff<br />
worry about it after the annual meeting because we don't have time<br />
<br />
radio in the office<br />
we're hosting radio club<br />
there'll be a mac mini and an antenna in the office<br />
don't touch it. don't.<br />
dillon will mark it<br />
if it gets knocked down, call dillon immediately<br />
like. call<br />
we should let board game club know<br />
dillon will send an email<br />
radio person's name is Matt Siko<br />
dillon's letting him in (no key card)<br />
<br />
group photo<br />
geek? eat? photo?<br />
from last year<br />
we could just take a photo on monday?<br />
mike will ask when they need it<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160316&diff=7915MinutesExec201603162016-04-27T15:44:12Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a two days<br />
went to a grad school interview<br />
students said they'd hear back by monday<br />
hasn't heard back<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a two days<br />
we have the fence<br />
by accident<br />
loooots of darts<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
days<br />
doing everything that's immediately due and little else<br />
it's not great but it's gettin him places<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had two days<br />
is in pre-greek sing mode<br />
but also homework<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had two days<br />
concept of time no longer exists<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a two days<br />
now actually HAS a sense of time<br />
(sorry zora)<br />
might have new rules for ctfws<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had days<br />
paralyzed by stress and fear and indecision<br />
so that's not great<br />
advisor made things potentially better???<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
ACTUALLY improv night<br />
(whoops)<br />
PH all of the 2nd floor rooms, 7pm<br />
snacks?<br />
they like cookies<br />
people<br />
erin won't be there<br />
everyone else will<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
what do we need to panic about?<br />
art<br />
they need people to do all the things<br />
lines really need to happen<br />
we need paint pens<br />
skye is going to home depot<br />
gonna try to get those box things<br />
also paint pens<br />
also paint for the fence<br />
shirts<br />
dillon got the hookup<br />
which means we have overnight shipping<br />
once we have the design we'll make an order form<br />
meeting about design on thursday<br />
deadline<br />
march 30 is the exec before moveon so we cannot order later than that<br />
form out by the 23rd (this time next exec)<br />
preferably before the 21st<br />
<br />
OTHER SHIRTS<br />
nika gave murphy the design for the kgbuggy shirts<br />
and now murphy's in charge of the order forms, since now there will be two on it<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Zombies 3/20<br />
2315, 7pm kickoff<br />
then it goes through friday<br />
tabling<br />
right now<br />
also they have the fence<br />
someone is on their way to home depot now for paint<br />
mods<br />
enough!<br />
they've also got characters wrapped<br />
exec is on call to help<br />
one designated person on call on weds?<br />
mike<br />
also joe will literally be part of it<br />
missions are set<br />
signups are going well<br />
skye emailed campus police yesterday<br />
will call if they don't reply by tomorrow<br />
colors are pink and orange this game for armband/headband<br />
rules?<br />
post them publically on the website<br />
also post the website everywhere<br />
skye is putting the link in the agenda<br />
<br />
Karaoke 3/25<br />
prefer breed hall<br />
erin can do the singsnap if necessary<br />
murphy won't be there<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
4/1 pajama party<br />
prefer a18<br />
IT'S ON APRIL FOOLS DAY IT'S CUTE<br />
defector's party<br />
we have to email the stever housefellow?<br />
dillon did, didn't get a response<br />
backup plan PH 125C<br />
reserve those rooms now<br />
<br />
BYLAWS AMENDMENT<br />
Catchup<br />
Exec has been working on the thing<br />
announced it right before break<br />
we're currently working on writing up the plain text/more readable document<br />
moving forward<br />
we're going to finish up the more readable document over the weekend<br />
we'll announce THAT this weekend/monday<br />
next week we're going to host office hours where people can talk about this thing in person<br />
office hours at like, multiple times<br />
times will be announced before monday the 21st<br />
if people can't make office hours, send exec an email<br />
people can also come to exec<br />
the weekend of the 26th, exec will finalize the document<br />
others can come observe, but the total design will be done<br />
march 28th, exec will submit the document to the general body<br />
so that stuff will happen BEFORE the annual meeting (and also before build week)<br />
april 4th, the general body will vote<br />
(exec is gonna get three separate when2meets so that we can schedule all this)<br />
liz vaughan (SAO liason)<br />
mike is meeting with her tomorrow (march 17) to get her input<br />
murphy will go too<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
credit card shenanigans<br />
joe needs to get re? certified?<br />
he needs to sign stuff tomorros<br />
USA?<br />
making reservation<br />
<br />
nom com<br />
we have a valid slate<br />
they'll do their first pass of legitimacy checking on the 4th<br />
joe (and others) can hound them over the next week<br />
proctors?<br />
nomcom's the proctors<br />
if there are issues tell mike<br />
<br />
meeting?<br />
there were lots of long stories<br />
it was okay but be aware<br />
<br />
"sleds are in the office, shit princess is destroyed"<br />
<br />
ctfws rules meetings<br />
weekly on monday at 8 in the judges room until it's done<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160330&diff=7914MinutesExec201603302016-04-27T15:43:27Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
sleep schedule is shifted<br />
...has to get up at 9 on saturday<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a couple of days<br />
there were things<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
had a couple of days<br />
things are okay<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a couple of days<br />
things due<br />
no time<br />
no motivation<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a couple of days<br />
<br />
joe<br />
had a couple days<br />
has downloaded 300k archived records of go games over the past two days<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
aasdguh had a day<br />
was very determined to get to class<br />
class was cancelled<br />
woulda known if he'd gone to the one on monday<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
destress table<br />
friday during the day<br />
redo business cards?<br />
<br />
gbgc/pajamas<br />
friday at the normal time and the normal place<br />
people not here<br />
murphy might not be there because he literally has jury duty<br />
maddy's thing opens at 6:00, some other folks might be late<br />
layout<br />
the room with the food is the not fort room<br />
so:<br />
A is no fort<br />
B is fort<br />
C is whatever<br />
<br />
MONDAY<br />
announcements<br />
nominations again<br />
(pay dues)<br />
booth<br />
we've got watch times<br />
we're going to try to fill them over the weekend<br />
but if we don't succeed we need to fill them on monday<br />
we also need to get people to staff the booth<br />
happening at the beginning of meeting<br />
TRY to keep it short<br />
...wristbands?<br />
friday april 8th<br />
amendment<br />
we should do it right after the thing (within old business)<br />
take the discussion from the table<br />
discuss until 5:05ish<br />
try to keep it to one exec answer per question<br />
motion for a rollcall vote<br />
and vote<br />
if it passes:<br />
erin will deal with the wiki and on the bridge<br />
we should send out an email?<br />
(murphy cleaned out the bylaws folder and added ed's amendment)<br />
allocations<br />
shirts<br />
defectors party<br />
move on<br />
in schmucks--we're a support network (by skye)<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT (4/16)<br />
defectors<br />
cake joke<br />
"CONGRATION YOU OLD"<br />
announcments<br />
erin will do the list and the facebook<br />
dillon got us on the list<br />
gotta go to costco this weekend<br />
we can order jim jams next week<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT (4/8): MOVE ON<br />
truck packin<br />
dillon and craig have talked about it<br />
schedule<br />
2:00 pick up truck<br />
3:00 booth chairs arrive<br />
4:00 first call<br />
5:45 packing until<br />
6:00 move on time<br />
booth chairs will all be at exec next week<br />
truck driver?<br />
dillon might be able to get meg<br />
she's expressed willingness<br />
dillon will confirm today<br />
food<br />
buy food at costco this weekend<br />
we are OUT<br />
also gatorade<br />
antoons run for the day of<br />
mike and skye are in charge<br />
alumni<br />
hype it up<br />
ask our friends<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
shirts<br />
booth<br />
people filled out the order form<br />
maddy picked gold for color<br />
the form and spreadsheet are in the drive<br />
buggy<br />
right now we have 7 orders<br />
but, we can over order and have extra<br />
they're subsidized by the booth shirts in the short term<br />
<br />
nomcom<br />
reeeeeal quick on monday<br />
they'll start checking membership and stuff after the 4th<br />
<br />
server stuff<br />
dillon has passed the torch to joe (and murphy)<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160420&diff=7913MinutesExec201604202016-04-27T15:43:09Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Skye<br />
Hilariously busy<br />
Very tired<br />
Maybe it'll be good<br />
Dylan<br />
RIP not here<br />
Tim thinks booth was great<br />
Murphy<br />
Not last :D<br />
Plugged a computer into a monitor and watched curling and played SMB3<br />
Rin<br />
Procrastinated and didn't do 112 (I know this feel)<br />
Harry<br />
Mousetrap car<br />
Maybe passed concepts<br />
Joe<br />
Still a nerd<br />
Made a GO AI that is slightly better than random chance<br />
Nika<br />
Learned about art<br />
Didn't start a paper <br />
Designed an addition to Hunt (that's really cool)<br />
Send help<br />
<br />
TRANSITIONS<br />
Exec mostly has challenge coins<br />
We're going to buy Dillon's challenge coin<br />
We all have access to the Google Drive<br />
Transition new stuff over from the old exec folder<br />
We don't have dropbox yet<br />
Remove old exec but let them keep the old files<br />
New exec has access to the old files<br />
Twitter<br />
Harry gets twitter!<br />
pass: you would've thought<br />
Dylan gets booth twitter!<br />
Exec has alias emails that are set up<br />
AFS access is configured<br />
Facebook chats exist<br />
Get space requests filled out and Rin will approve them<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Bake & Barter<br />
There is a spreadsheet that we should fill out<br />
We're going to get a collection of things at the UC black chairs if it rains<br />
Please bake things!<br />
Or buy things!<br />
No paper, no sheet metal, no garbage, no stolen things<br />
Useless Stuff Auction<br />
I should record purchases, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd bidders<br />
Sell stuff from the booth<br />
Maybe crayons<br />
Sell things in different amounts<br />
Make a mystery box<br />
Anything that doesn't get sold either goes to the KGB as an organization or the giving wall<br />
People who made booth art get first dibs<br />
DO THIS BEFORE THE AUCTION<br />
What are we selling Nika's painting for?<br />
They will figure it out! Don't auction it!<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
LDOC picnic<br />
Par Fark is reserved. We need to print out the reservation and bring it<br />
Bring food! We can grill unless Pittsburgh hates us<br />
Joe and Mike are getting food I think<br />
<br />
FINAL EVENT<br />
MAFIA NIGHT<br />
We pretend we're mafia apparently<br />
Bucca Di Bepo for Italian Food<br />
No to the group menu<br />
Tell people so they can RSVP<br />
<br />
UNDERGROUND TOUR<br />
We need to meet with everybody to plan next Underground Tour<br />
Murphy will email us about this<br />
Food for next year?<br />
<br />
SOMEBODY WANTS TO BUY CRAYONS<br />
is it a fetish? (The K does not stand for kinkshaming)<br />
We want infinite crayons forever<br />
KGB SAYS NO D:<<br />
<br />
BOOTH GRANTS<br />
They want our receipts<br />
KGB Takes over student senate<br />
Things need to be reimbursed<br />
<br />
WIKI <br />
People can't make wiki accounts<br />
Maybe fix the website?<br />
<br />
DOES ANYBODY EVER VOTE ABSENTEE<br />
Why don't we allow ranked voting?<br />
<br />
HANDBOOK ACOMPANYMENT TO BYLAWS AMENDMENT<br />
Can old exec add bulletpoints to thigns they want in the handbook<br />
<br />
WE NEED MORE BOXES<br />
Put things in boxes then find out how many we need<br />
Boxes cost $7<br />
Also clean the office<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160413&diff=7912MinutesExec201604132016-04-27T15:38:20Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
mike<br />
had a couple of days<br />
booth<br />
<br />
skye<br />
had a couple of days<br />
booth<br />
not enough booth<br />
<br />
dillon<br />
had a couple fo days<br />
too many things<br />
<br />
erin<br />
had a couple of days<br />
exam at midnight<br />
30 billion things<br />
<br />
zora<br />
had a couple of days<br />
not booth<br />
tuesdays are so adult<br />
<br />
joe<br />
had a couple of days<br />
really effective at things he shouldn't be doing<br />
<br />
murphy<br />
lots of wasting time and booth<br />
all things he shoulda done between 8pm last night and 8am this morning<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
defectors<br />
picking up cake on saturday<br />
leaving sometime between 12:30 and 1 (hopefully)<br />
all else fails, joe<br />
be at thing at 2 for setup<br />
order jimmyjohns tomorrow<br />
5pm dillon and mike<br />
erin will post on friday<br />
stuff<br />
shirts<br />
stick<br />
paper<br />
drawing things<br />
cups<br />
forks<br />
knives<br />
napkins<br />
etc<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
USA<br />
credit card was approved<br />
doherty whatever is reserved<br />
<br />
NEXT NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
farpark is reserved<br />
dillon will reserve a18 as backup<br />
<br />
OTHER<br />
annual meeting<br />
gotta schedule transition meeting<br />
<br />
thistle photo<br />
who care<br />
<br />
nomcom<br />
they're dealing with absentees<br />
erin will send the list of candidates to members dlist<br />
may need strong poke<br />
<br />
shirts<br />
nika gets a buggy shirt because she DESIGNED it<br />
<br />
DONE<br />
much thank y'all<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=MinutesExec20160323&diff=7911MinutesExec201603232016-04-27T15:38:07Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a couple days<br />
pulled an all nighter on monday<br />
sleep is a question<br />
<br />
Skye<br />
had a couple days<br />
it's been a time<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
there are not enough hours in a day<br />
<br />
Erin<br />
had a day<br />
has been sick the past couple days<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a day<br />
v tired<br />
<br />
Joe<br />
had a day<br />
has been workng on parallel almost nonstop for about 24 hours<br />
someone is running the os kernal simulator on EVERYTHING<br />
<br />
Murphy<br />
had a couple days<br />
too MUCH sleep<br />
<br />
THIS WEEK'S EVENT<br />
Karaoke<br />
7pm MMA14<br />
We should put a sign on breed hall to redirect people maybe<br />
erin will make singsnap happen if necessary<br />
dillon will get snacks<br />
<br />
<br />
zombies<br />
it ends around 5 on friday<br />
skye will try to bring as many people to the event as possible<br />
the trick is to talk to the police twice a day<br />
they are very appreciative<br />
(apparently they think parking services is full of dicks)<br />
the new resupply mechanic?<br />
not great, not terrible<br />
(CMU had a bomb threat so they can't do the briefcase anymore)<br />
selfie mechanism?<br />
eeeeeeh it's rough<br />
there's a lot of fumbling<br />
joe is gonna be on call (on the cart)<br />
the fb sticker is an important cultural artifact<br />
(it's pusheen bouncing in a cardboard box)<br />
<br />
NEXT WEEK'S EVENT<br />
pajama night<br />
7pm, dillon's gonna try to reserve a18*<br />
<br />
FUTURE EVENTS<br />
move on<br />
move on time 6pm flat for the truck<br />
apparently handcarry is much later?<br />
the truck<br />
15ft<br />
dillon'll talk later about packing<br />
2pm pickup that day<br />
prob just gonna park it in morewood lot<br />
can probably fit all the flats in the truck<br />
the plan<br />
ask people to show up at 3:30<br />
pack until 6<br />
we need to pack everything we need for levelling in the truck<br />
craig will deliberate and report next week<br />
all booth chairs should be here april 6<br />
builds<br />
good job with the shame dylan<br />
time to start poking people<br />
booth shirts<br />
order form is out<br />
dillon will order them next wednesday<br />
maddy will make the color choice<br />
once we get the shirts, maddy will do the printing the following weekend<br />
lumber<br />
there are lots of people who are 21 and can drive soooooo time to go buy wood<br />
<br />
defectors<br />
we need a lot of things<br />
rooms<br />
normally we do stever<br />
has kitchen, separate party area<br />
and it's next to midway (only not anymore)<br />
the big room in porter (PH 125C)<br />
it's closer to midway this year<br />
we could reserve a room up the hall for prep?<br />
decided: 2:30 stever<br />
schedule form<br />
thx tim<br />
dillon is filling it out<br />
(defector''''s''')<br />
decorations?<br />
eh<br />
supplies<br />
plank for signatures<br />
long roll of paper<br />
markers and shit<br />
food<br />
jim jams<br />
cake<br />
come up with a saying!<br />
<br />
OTHER STUFF<br />
nomcom<br />
it's fine<br />
our slate is valid<br />
<br />
digital stuff<br />
zombies website<br />
is. somewhere. maybe.<br />
joe should ask dillon<br />
our server is moving from cmukgb.club to kgb.club<br />
TIME FOR JOE TO CARRY THE TORCH<br />
<br />
dropbox<br />
we should probably boot marlena<br />
whoops<br />
murphy is doing it<br />
<br />
amendment vote<br />
people need to pay their dues like n o w<br />
zora and mike will be there early<br />
office hours have been chill<br />
skye's been meeting with people independently, we'll address that feedback this weekend<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Nifty&diff=7910Nifty2016-04-27T15:14:23Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>A [[Chris Newman]] trademarked word. Be sure to throw money at him every time you use it.<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Nifty]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130212&diff=7909Minutes201302122016-04-27T15:05:24Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
has been gone for a while, sort of<br />
went to New York last Monday<br />
for an interview that probably went well<br />
got to fly home directly, at a reasonable hour<br />
instead having to be at the airport at four in the morning and having a connection<br />
has concluded flying operations for the next three weeks<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
is stuck at the airport<br />
"goddamn plane was so full so they had to check my bag"<br />
and other beautiful texts<br />
new people<br />
Steven, MechE, South Florida, only has one pair of shoes that work in the snow<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a Thanksgiving<br />
had two Thanksgiving meals<br />
got grad school applications done<br />
played a lot of video games<br />
it was a successful break<br />
EVENT<br />
KGB Falls On Its Ass<br />
Friday, 8:30, PHA18A<br />
we'll leave for the rink soon after that<br />
cost $4, plus skate rental ($2.50)<br />
OTHER EVENT<br />
Geek Eat<br />
at the Cheesecake factory, the reservation is for 5:00<br />
meet at black chairs at 4:00<br />
RSVP by the start of the event on Friday<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a Thanksgiving<br />
began with a 9:00am plane flight<br />
got to see her dogs, who are fluffy<br />
and also family, she guesses that was nice too<br />
participated in three generational cook shenanigans<br />
given her sister's love of showing her youtube videos, has now probably seen every single tf2 video on the internet<br />
came back on a 6:00am flight<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a Thanksgiving<br />
started on Tuesday, with baking pies<br />
then catching a plane at 9:00 in the morning on Wednesday<br />
Thanksgiving itself involved getting in a fight with their uncle about linguistics<br />
then using a recording of Thanksgiving dinner, which included the fight about linguistics, to do a linguistics project<br />
linguistics was a theme over break<br />
also homework<br />
then eventually they got back to Pittsburgh<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a Thanksgiving<br />
left campus at four in the morning<br />
spent Thanksgiving working becuase his family is moving<br />
still tons of food and tons of fun<br />
got back late last night<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
had a weekend/Thanksgiving break<br />
started with driving Zora to the airport at ass o' clock in the morning<br />
made mashed sweet potatoes on Thursday<br />
which included putting brown sugar on top and applying a blowtorch<br />
and not buring the apartment down<br />
Maija held the fire extinguisher<br />
then watched a lot of media<br />
and did not do work<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
ad hoc I Feel Safe Committee<br />
the TSA confiscated Frieder's Swiss Army Knife on the way back to Pittsburgh<br />
but not on the way out<br />
and not the other two knives that he brought back<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Feel Safe Committee<br />
at security for one of Dillon's flights there was nobody even WATCHING the x-ray machine<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Feel Safe Committee<br />
Maija misses her fire extinguisher<br />
<br />
dkirby all of the committees, one of which is misappropriated<br />
his family spent Thanksgiving complaining about Obamacare<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Feel Safe Committee<br />
there are a lot of coyotes in Texas<br />
Marlena's neighbor offered to teach them tricks for dealing with them<br />
also mentioned that they have a silencer<br />
<br />
ad hoc Unfortunate Typo Committee<br />
97% of public would prefer GMOs to be dangerous<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Feel Safe Committee<br />
half of Maija's jaw cracked really loudly just now<br />
<br />
ad hoc Peace Love Turnpike Committee<br />
what<br />
<br />
ad hoc Minnesota Transportations Committee<br />
they're building a whole airport across the state<br />
in order to get from place to place, you just run across the airport<br />
which covers the whole state<br />
<br />
ad hoc New State Mottos Committee<br />
Minnesota, the land of a thousand lakes and one airport<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The Thing!<br />
all the travel headaches caused in the coming week are not Stuart's fault<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
<br />
New Boots Committee: perform a series of tests on said boots to see if they are in fact made for walking<br />
change all instances of "boots" to "booth"<br />
PASSES<br />
has she tried the Minnesota airport?<br />
Booth Committee: this booth is NOT made for walking<br />
change all instances of "booth" to "booooooooth"<br />
PASSES<br />
there's not three feet of clearance in those boots<br />
Ethan was going to make a kinky boots joke<br />
but now we can make a kinky booth joke<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to McGinnis, disbanded<br />
<br />
Naptime Committee: snoring<br />
change purpose to "xxxxx chhhhhhh"<br />
PASSES<br />
change purpose to "darth vader breathing noises"<br />
PASSES<br />
during Marlena's 8:30 art class, everyone was really tired<br />
so to wake them up the teacher made them line dance for 10 minutes<br />
it worked<br />
change purpose to "dark helmet breathing noises"<br />
PASSES<br />
your kitchen spices need their rest too<br />
nap thyme<br />
4<br />
did Marlena really get new boots?<br />
they look really smooth for reality<br />
$3 to Ethan, you become a chair of this committee each day that you nap<br />
<br />
Committer Committee: to commit and push<br />
Frieder gets this joke<br />
we aren't ready for this kind of committement<br />
the KGB can't stand for this kind of subversion<br />
change all instances of "Committer" to "Committer Critter"<br />
PASSES<br />
ad hoc I Got Beaten To The Get And Subversion Jokes Committee<br />
mercurial, bitches<br />
something about pull<br />
I'm not a cs major so I don't understand what this commmittee is for loop<br />
WHILE we're on this topic<br />
motion to roll back this committee? I don't like these changes<br />
FAILS<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Frosty, everyone shall chair<br />
<br />
Apparently I'm Still Sleeping Committee: it's a dream it doesn't matter anyway<br />
Daniel John Kirby Nightmare In Dreamland Committee<br />
Oren kinda knew he was asleep<br />
he was dreaming that he was in calc lecture<br />
He was called on by the professor to do a problem on the board<br />
He replied, "No thank you, Professor. I'm asleep, I don't have to do math."<br />
you have to wake up<br />
ad hoc Lucid Dream Committee: let's fly<br />
Marlena will be accepting purpose changes for things that she has to do while she's asleep<br />
change puropse to "buy a bagel and shoot the cashier"<br />
sorry Ethan<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to ...something?<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to "always be squidding"<br />
PASSES<br />
change purpose to "[insert otherwise unattainable celebrity here]"<br />
which one?<br />
the one that you want the most<br />
FAILS<br />
insert unatainable actor WHERE?<br />
you have to wake up<br />
change purpose to that kickball thing<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to "buy this committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
misappropriated KGB Makes A Porno Committee: motion to change the purpose back to the one including second base<br />
dilatory, poorly defined<br />
PASSES<br />
$13 to McGinnis, dkirby will chair<br />
<br />
KGB TSA Committee: to be directly responsible for making sure that no one in this room will get home on time<br />
change purpose to "to be directly responsible for making sure that no one in this room will get to kiltie on time"<br />
PASSES<br />
bar the doors<br />
change all instances of "on time" to "with nailclippers"<br />
FAILS<br />
who brought a fire to the meeting?<br />
append "with nailclippers" to the purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Frieder, no one who will leave this place never will chair (so everyone)<br />
<br />
Consensitive Committee: create unusual words sounding like things--like "predactive"<br />
irrigardless<br />
this is a wonturfferal idea<br />
how does this committee feel about the concept of ethnophysics?<br />
how many words do you think this committee will make? like, a guestimate?<br />
more than threeve<br />
how does this committee feel about pseudosyzygy?<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Frosty, McGinnis will chair<br />
<br />
Committee Dedicated To Exploration, Discovery, And Research Of Space Pickles: to build a dillatorium<br />
ad hoc Watchtower Committee: we found pickles in our fridge<br />
they weren't put in there as pickles<br />
motion to add suspicious quotation marks around the last word in the purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
Innovative Technologies Committee, in conjunction with the Dillontory Committee: approves<br />
Skyentology: sorry about the abundance of space pickles<br />
they weren't there to start<br />
ad hoc USSR Committee: would like to rspond with a space potato<br />
spudnik<br />
it is Oren's opinion that space pickles are the only ones that can be used for pickle chips<br />
to be eaten with grilled cheese sandwiches made from moon cheese<br />
PASSES<br />
$4 to Mike, Mike and the other chairs of the Innovative Technologies Committee will chair<br />
<br />
Real Money? Committee: you mean we're supposed to pay real money for these?<br />
change name to "Bitcoin"<br />
FAILS<br />
but real money is uncountable<br />
what no<br />
yipyipyipyipyipyipyip<br />
Sharky Freshman Committee: would just like to get up and stomp around<br />
PASSES<br />
$1 to McGinnis, bitcoin users will chair<br />
<br />
Appun Committee: yip yip<br />
yipyipyipyipyipyipyip<br />
how does this committee feel about the Sesame Street Aliens?<br />
they are welcome in this universe<br />
MY CABBAGES!<br />
you're opening pundora's box here<br />
like, from the movie<br />
with the blue people<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Mike, eforney will chair<br />
<br />
Out Of Committees Contingency Plan: we're gonna run out of committees at some point, we need a step by step plan for when that happens<br />
has that ever stopped us before?<br />
board games<br />
are you aware that as a chair you can create subcommittees<br />
with very little regulation<br />
schmucks<br />
really long schmucks<br />
was that a dick joke<br />
the obvious solution is to use red matter to open up a portal to another universe so we can use their committee<br />
puns<br />
yip<br />
imagine it, a horrible distopia, youtube parties week after week<br />
please don't joke<br />
t h e c o m m i t t e e t o t a l k r e a l l y s l o w l y r e p o r t s s u p p o r t f o r t h i s s u g g e s t i o n<br />
would this other universe have a strong antisecond?<br />
scientists have informed us that by 2050 there will be no more puns or committees<br />
you can help<br />
get a hybrid committee-pun<br />
get Marlena to wake up<br />
motion to designate this universe KGB Prime in the interest of multiverse organization<br />
out of order<br />
on second thought, let's not go to the universe where committees aren't created<br />
it's not a very silly place<br />
PASSES<br />
$4 to Frieder, the person who creates the last committee ever and he will chair<br />
<br />
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for food for the event contingency plan<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
Last Committee This Committee Will Ever Be: to be the last committe this committee will ever be<br />
change name and purpose to "Second Committee This Committee Will Ever Be: to be the second committee this committee will ever be"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name and purpose to "Last Committee This Committee Will Ever Be: to be the first committee this committee will ever be"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "committee" to "giraffe"<br />
FAILS<br />
Max Bid Committee: approves<br />
motion to make this committee a subcommittee of the first subcommittee of the committee<br />
dilatory<br />
$1 to McGinnis, he doesn't know who will chair<br />
<br />
Russel's Paradox Committee: to contain all subcommittees which do not contain themselves<br />
change name to "Russel's Sprouts Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
what if there is a subcommittee, somewhere out there<br />
you can't prove it<br />
math joke, physics joke, computer science joke, art joke<br />
we're done here<br />
change name to "No Subcommittee Left Behind"<br />
PASSES<br />
when do we have to take our 50 standardized tests?<br />
No Child Left Unblind Committee: hey, I'm relevant!<br />
oh my god Ethan could get a dog and name it Rage<br />
so he could unleash Rage<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Frieder, every dog named Rage will chair<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
KGB Falls On Its Ass<br />
meet in PH A18A at 8:30<br />
bring cash<br />
If weather prevents the event, we'll just be in the PHA18* rooms<br />
<br />
OTHER EVENT<br />
Geek Eat<br />
Cheesecake Factory, Wednesday, Dec. 11<br />
meet at the UC Black Chairs at 4:00pm<br />
email exec by the start of the event on Friday to RSVP<br />
<br />
Booth!<br />
meeting on Sunday at 3:00 pm<br />
mostly art discussion, probably<br />
most of plot and construction planning has been finished<br />
<br />
there will be a KGB meeting next Monday<br />
we'll get out early so people can get to finals<br />
it will be interesting<br />
Broman promises<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
Marlena needs your screams<br />
no seriously, she needs to record them<br />
talk to her!<br />
<br />
dkirby is moving<br />
he needs help to move a dresser and a tv<br />
they're big<br />
soon would be good<br />
talk to him, he'll feed you<br />
<br />
we are now in purple<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130422&diff=7908Minutes201304222016-04-27T15:05:09Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>Bubbles: Had a weekend it was booth and carnival and all that funk. It has been an absolute pleasure being on exec these past few years and serving as president. It was so awesome kicking ass with all of you. Current exec was a pain in the ass and a half some times but they were awesome. Next exec will be awesome. <br />
<br />
Tim 1:<br />
Set his clocks 10 minutes slow so he would be late for everything. A lemur for my valentine with dbesse and mbritton as scav hunt 4 years ago. No matter what happen, this club has been here for 25 years and is always a haven for weird of all times. If you don't win, you are still an important part of this organization. IF you do, DONT SCREW IT UP. HAve fun, these guys are your friends and are there for you.<br />
<br />
Tim 2: (booth trophy). Has been an increasingly longer year, was 2veep and booth chair. Was fun but would not do again. Was worth it, though. Was glad he got to do both of those things. Has been a great year. <br />
<br />
Margaret: HAd a carnival was cool and booth and old people and cake and pineapples. Smashed a pineapple for the first time. Can't tell which parts of car and neck are red because of sunburn and dye. Go one last pravda. <br />
<br />
Xander: Had a year. Involved getting elected RecSec, therefore dooming the KGB to a year of unending minutes wankery. It involved becoming a weapons instructor for small children, meeting people who would change my career path forever, and having bad luck with housing. It involved getting very excited about how awesome and numerous the freshman were at the beginning, and overjoyed that most of them ended up staying. I met one of my heroes, and was not disappointed. I fought and won against two brutal semesters of lab work, which I still love despite the unending punishment it tried to put me through. I wrote for and helped put on two phenomenal puzzlehunts. We all lost a dear friend. There was learning new languages and helping people out in strange places in the mountains. There was telling mostly truths and one lie during officer reports. There was snow when there should not have been. And of course, there was an incredible booth that was perfect in every way. And I may have posted minutes once or twice. It has had its ups and downs, but I had an amazing time through all of it and I would like to thank each and every one of you for making this year so awesome. It was an honor, my friends and comrades.<br />
<br />
Kelly:<br />
Had a week it was a busy busy week and made booth happen. it was fun and crazy and adjectives. If you want to go for spring carnival committee it is an amazing time. IT was hard moving away from KGBooth to carnival comitte but it is well worth it. You learn quite a lot. KGB put on a totally kickass booth. The judges loved it and were really glad to reward us 2nd place. HAs been here for two year as treasurer. Right now we have a weird financial situation, because Dropbox has not mailed us a check and the university has randomly reimbursed a bunch of people for stuff they should not have. But we still have ~$2500 in various places. Started with ~$900 and ended with this. Thank you KGB. Will be assisting new treasurer with finances. <br />
<br />
Marlena:<br />
Had a year. Had highs and lows. Carnival was especially good. Got little sleep over it. Elections. Is exicted.<br />
<br />
<br />
Committees:<br />
<br />
Booth committee: Thank you to everyone who made this possible. At the beginning of the year, we were kind of nervous at how this turned hour because so many freshman. Turns out they are super competent and really good at booth. <br />
<br />
Taxidermy: really happy about funkelstiltskin mannequin<br />
<br />
Spring carnival: Success<br />
<br />
White carnival committee: success<br />
<br />
THE FUNK: success<br />
<br />
DJ is full of himself: Feels the need<br />
<br />
Floor is lava killed all exec not wearing lava boots. <br />
<br />
We have Quorum<br />
<br />
ELECTIONS HAPPENED IN DECIMAL.<br />
<br />
New president: Tim Broman<br />
<br />
New 1veep: Caroline Colombo<br />
<br />
New 2veep: JRAM<br />
<br />
New CorSec: Marlena Abraham<br />
<br />
New RecSec: Zora Gilbert<br />
<br />
<br />
NOTE: MINUTES AFTER THIS POINT ARE DONE BY ZORA<br />
<br />
<br />
Natural Number pride committee:<br />
Imaginary #s : we’re number 3<br />
Eforney: Number dos!<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to tvaughn, booth chairs<br />
<br />
Marlena has Points of Business:<br />
<br />
Marlena: motion to replenish the fund!<br />
Kelly: Motion to increase the fund to $500<br />
(We CAN support the increase)<br />
PASSES, fund replenished & increased<br />
Marlena: motion to poundify (?) techie<br />
Bubbles: motion to <br />
<br />
Dillon: Motion to set dues to $5/semester, $10/year<br />
Thomas: increase to $15/semester, $20/year<br />
Eforney: In the case of people not being able to afford, should be able to talk to exec<br />
Margaret: people can do most stuff w/o dues anyway<br />
Broman: motions to suspend, fails<br />
PASSES, dues set and increased<br />
<br />
JRAM: $50 for food for event<br />
<br />
Get vanilla oreos for the next event committee:<br />
Fails for lack of a second<br />
<br />
The Dillontory committee: dilatory<br />
<br />
RR ANNOUNCEMENTS ect<br />
<br />
Event: Bake barter<br />
Fri, 10 AM to 5 PM. Googledoc on fb for tabling<br />
Event: Useless stuff auction<br />
7 PM Wean Commons<br />
<br />
Kelly: Turn in hardhats<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
<br />
Bubbles: DICKS COCKS PENIS<br />
<br />
Rglenn: Talk to him about Puns for Lemonade!<br />
<br />
McGinnis: Dillon is the first male treasurer! Congrats KGB.<br />
(also broman has dated all treasurers who have been treasurer during his time at CMU)<br />
<br />
Dkirby: Nerf wars this weekend? At least one more this year.<br />
<br />
Maija: Thanks alums for helping make food for booth!<br />
<br />
Mbritton: email him about buying new wood for booth! Especially if you have a job<br />
<br />
The Assassinations committee would like to report! Attack!<br />
<br />
Twright: 2008 was the last time exec was mostly female.<br />
<br />
JRAM: Puzzlehunt! Staff it! Email him!<br />
<br />
Kelly: motion to GTFO (but we’re already purple)<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130424&diff=7907Minutes201304242016-04-27T15:04:48Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>Officer Reports<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
ACTUALLY had a weekend-no booth and no KGB event. Instead, he went to a formal.<br />
He's FREE! Suck it JRAM.<br />
Google games. Won some neat things by being good at things Google doesn't care about<br />
Has a lot of work to do<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
It involved being purple.<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
Had a weekend!<br />
Useless stuff auction was good! Bought a keyboard<br />
Google Games was good! 3 of the 5 top teams had a member of KGB exec on them<br />
EVENT! LDoC Picnic, 5:30, black chairs, going to Farpark<br />
OTHER EVENT! Mafia Night on reading day. Meet at black chairs at 5:00. Show up on time!<br />
RSVP by email! Make sure he gets it by end of LDoC Picnic.<br />
Bring real cash dollars because splitting checks on credit cards sucks.<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
Had a weekend!<br />
Auctioned things for money and dollars and was mistaken for Ramona Flowers<br />
Saturday was the last aeronauts campaign :(<br />
Watched Three Musketeers afterwards, and it almost perfectly replicated the plot of the campaign.<br />
Sunday was a "work day": 5 hours were lost to climbing and driving around.<br />
Not a zombie!<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
Had a weekend!<br />
The theme was "Productive but not productive enough"<br />
UPA, then actual job, then "work," then not doing work, then "doing work" (but the wrong work), then WORK.<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
Had a weekend!<br />
We sold things at USA, which makes him happy as treasurer.<br />
Fourth at Google games! Not enough to get prizes....<br />
Sunday felt like Monday because WORK<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
Had a weekend!<br />
Got the most useful thing at USA!<br />
Saturday was a black hole! Frisbee and pretending to do work.<br />
Built a mousetrap car<br />
<br />
Committee Reports<br />
Committee to test rec sec would like remind our shiny new humanities major that most of the KGB is CS students. <br />
<br />
Puzzlehunt committee. People who want to staff should go to PH 19C at 4:30 on Wednesday.<br />
<br />
Motion to create out of order committee. OUT OF ORDER<br />
<br />
The Pasta Tonight Committee is excited for mafia night<br />
<br />
The Ad Hoc Pasta GNIGT committee would like to say: “you empty-headed wipers of other people's bottoms, I wave my private parts at your aunties.”<br />
<br />
Storytelling committee<br />
So you know the thing that says “4.29.12 never forget” on R7's fridge?<br />
been so much more than a year...but so much less<br />
it was blissful and naive<br />
how do you honor a national tragedy?<br />
we're lying to ourselves when we say things are back to normal<br />
it was a day like any other...who would expect the tragedy<br />
college students gathered in roselawn and needed FOOD. FAST.<br />
sandwich shop in Illinois--Jimmy Johns<br />
got popular fast in Charleston and expanded to the WORLD<br />
Jimmy John's tugged on the College students' hearts<br />
passed around a laptop and entered their sandwiches<br />
but when did they want them delivered?<br />
but the dropdown menu, at 9:00PM on a Sunday, reported "closed"<br />
The college students felt deeply cheated for the first time.<br />
There is no reversing that day, nor bringing back the lost sandwiches.<br />
We mustn't let the experience hold us down.<br />
April 29th, 2012. Never forget.<br />
<br />
Old Business<br />
<br />
The Thing! Getting zombied is not Xander's fault.<br />
<br />
New Business<br />
<br />
Best state in the union committee: Illinois is the best state b/c jimmy johns<br />
Name change to best date<br />
all instances of Illinois changed to April 25 DENIED<br />
it was a reference to Miss Congeniality<br />
Change best to cheapest in title FAILED<br />
April 28 2012 appended to purpose<br />
Change all instances of April to bug mars DENIED<br />
Change April to Maypril DENIED<br />
question called<br />
PASSES. $2 to Thomas. Disbanded<br />
<br />
The Soup Committee: Welcome to the 45th annual Loup de Soup. We have just returned to the tomato circuit and we are beginning the spilt pea....alsdkjgaalksdg<br />
Bubbles: this committee could only get more Oren if there was a bunch of Star Trek shit<br />
motion to change the accent to German<br />
only if appended (so, the purpose is now repeated twice in different accents) DONE<br />
change all instances of soup to soup or salad DENIED<br />
append to purpose the same thing again in an eastern European accent<br />
committee to test rec sec reports early success<br />
PASSES. $4 to Peter. Diana will chair.<br />
<br />
Out of Order committee fails for lack of a second<br />
<br />
The Shit I Lied About in the Tartan Committee: The Tartan is moving to Alaska<br />
Ethan: given takeover of PHI: everyone is required to take alcohol-based course every semester<br />
Xander: so like ochem 2?<br />
ABSTAINED. $3 to Drew. JRAM chairs.<br />
<br />
The Oren and Absurdity hour: HOAC weeeeeeeeee<br />
A live barracuda has been appended.<br />
purpose changed to “I bet you were expecting something outlandish here”<br />
PASSES. $2 to Oren. Sir Thomas Edison and Oren will chair<br />
<br />
The But It's Intuitive Committee: push well designed products on unwilling people<br />
Paywall prepended<br />
motion to torrent it instead<br />
you wouldn't download an iPhone, would you?<br />
Xander has been banned for 45 hours from CMU servers<br />
Change name and purpose to But It's In Two Pieces: to cause havoc<br />
Name Changed to It's Not In Two Pieces. Yet.<br />
PASSES $3 to Marlena. Thomas chairs.<br />
<br />
Marlena and Oren Committee: they'll each choose half of purpose<br />
Name changed to the Oren and Marlena variety hour<br />
Name changed to Mandarin Orange Committee<br />
Marlena changes every other word of the purpose to “This. Is. Not. A. Drill.”<br />
Oren changes every other, other word to “AOOOUUHH”<br />
Purpose changed to the entire text of The Raven <br />
Phone case will go to the winner of the auction! Someone threw it at Marlena.<br />
all instances of quoth changed to said<br />
replaced all instances of Nevermore with Fuck You <br />
replace all instances Lenore with Bug Mars: DENIED<br />
replace every instance of a letter with prime index to bug mars: DENIED<br />
replaced all instances of the word raven to “writing desk”<br />
question called<br />
PASSES. $3 to Broman. Whoever owns the phone case will chair.<br />
<br />
Victor Sage Speed Dial Committee: to ease calling of question<br />
question called<br />
PASSES. $2 to Drew. Every one in room chairs. Drew gets the Phone case<br />
<br />
Motion to make allocation for $100 for this week's event.<br />
It needs to be more because burgers<br />
IT'S A GOOD IDEA<br />
<br />
We aren't funding your doomsday plans, Xander.<br />
<br />
Motion to make allocation not to exceed $10 to buy Stephen dinner<br />
IT'S A BAD IDEA<br />
replace all instances of Stephen with the Raven: failed<br />
Thomas: After ALL Stephen has given us…his blood, his sweat, his semen…doesn't he deserve dinner?<br />
Thomas is clearly using the royal “we.”<br />
The Napoleon J Bonaparte committee approves.<br />
question called<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
motion to, over the next few weeks, have each person who voted for the KGB to buy Stephen dinner actually buy him dinner<br />
<br />
Acclamotion Committee: you gotta swing your hips now...<br />
acclamotion replaced with locomotion<br />
motion to remain in motion unless force acts upon it<br />
crazy train appended to purpose<br />
grand funk railroad (both band and railroad) appended to purpose<br />
append Thomas the Tank Engine theme song: FAILED<br />
Thomas the Tank Engine theme song mashup with BMX appended to purpose<br />
~Arthur theme song interlude~<br />
question called<br />
PASSES $2 to Thomas. Emily, Adam, Thomas, Al chair.<br />
<br />
something committee: general purpose of KGB<br />
change purpose to installing windows, computer waste in general<br />
purpose to It's only five twenty!<br />
Append to purpose it's five o clock... somewhere<br />
McGinnis filibusters. Thanks. You made my job easy.<br />
Question called due to hunger.<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
Unnecessary and Uncomfortable Stream of Racial Slurs Committee<br />
NOPE<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee: alcohology<br />
Champers (?) appended<br />
dkirby objects, committee is redundant with Pitt's existance<br />
alcohology changed to alcoholomy<br />
motion to obey law of equivalent exchange<br />
alcohology grad students will suffer drinking problems later in life...but not because of alcohology, because of grad school<br />
question called<br />
PASSES $15 to Drew. Drew and anyone who wants to will Chair<br />
<br />
Announcements<br />
<br />
EVENTS! LDoC picnic! Black chairs at 5:30, Farpark at 6:00. NOT FLAGSTAFF.<br />
Mafia Night! Meet at black chairs at 5:00, RSVP to JRAM<br />
<br />
Schmucks<br />
<br />
Nerf war Saturday, 9:15 PM. Wean 7500 (the usual spot). Don't need your own Nerf guns.<br />
<br />
Puzzlehunt staff! 9:30 AM PH A19C. Please show up so they don't panic!<br />
<br />
Purple and GTFO<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130506&diff=7906Minutes201305062016-04-27T15:04:34Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>Officer Reports<br />
Broman<br />
Had a weekend<br />
Seemed a lot more like a weekend than previous weekends.<br />
Did NOTHING except stay up until 5AM because finals means be irresponsible.<br />
Has to run a review session after this<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
Had a week. And a weekend.<br />
Weekend was better, and went to a baseball game.<br />
No new members and no birthdays are this week<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
Had a weekend<br />
LDoC picnic was good times.<br />
Event! Mafia night, 5:00 PM WEDNESDAY at the black chairs. Dress classily or not unclassily.<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
Had a weekend<br />
Did mostly work, but also discovered a game that teaches languages by popping balloons and killing fish.<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Can't remember what happened.<br />
Oh right! LDoC Picnic, then not work (linguistics party!) on Saturday, then WORK on Sunday.<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Played maybe more Bang than Frisbee<br />
Spent saturday doing entirely useless things<br />
Spent Sunday doing work<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
Had a weekend<br />
Played some frisbee. A lot of frisbee. Her feet hurt.<br />
Free comic book day! Got free comics and not so free comics and then didn't do work.<br />
<br />
Committee Reports<br />
<br />
Ad hoc Done with college but no actually reports<br />
<br />
Thomas and Bubbles fuckery. Yeah, read into that.<br />
<br />
The guild of calamitous intent is recruiting one new member. Speak to him.<br />
<br />
The can you repeat that in song committee calls on Bubbles and Thomas's fuckery.<br />
The can you repeat that in rap committee obliges.<br />
<br />
Old Business<br />
Xander has the thing, but not with him.<br />
Thomas wants the spirit of the thing. Not studying for finals is not his fault.<br />
<br />
New Business<br />
Things CMU students don't say committee: I am actually really excited for the final after this meeting.<br />
He really is.<br />
~Intermission for seat arguments~<br />
Passed! $2 to Thomas. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Itsy bitsy teeny weenie yellow polkadot committee: To think of words that rhyme with committee<br />
Tortellini<br />
Muselini<br />
The Bulbus Bufont committee approves<br />
Purpose changed to finding italian words that rhyme with bikini.<br />
Tortellini<br />
Tortellini<br />
Tortellini<br />
Turtllini<br />
Abstained! $5 to Margaret. Margaret and anyone who wants to make clever<br />
<br />
Dibs enforcer Committee: Xander pulls at Thomas's hair.<br />
Dibs changed to mean Dibs ice cream. FAILED<br />
All Dibs replaced with Dippin Dots. DONE.<br />
All Dots to Dibs. DONE.<br />
All Dippin to Double Dippin. FAILS.<br />
Al: We have so low class that we could be a Marxist Utopia?<br />
Change to Class committee: Have class outside. FAILS.<br />
Bug Mars!<br />
Tortellini.<br />
PASSED. $2 to Thomas. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Announcements:<br />
EVENT! Mafia night. Wednesday at FIVE at Black Chairs, dress classy and bring money.<br />
If you haven't RSVP'd, we can't guarantee you a space.<br />
Talk to JRAM about Meeting of the Minds/being late.<br />
<br />
TO THE ROTUNDA.<br />
Back to new business<br />
The Shitty Scifi something Committee: Something else.<br />
PASSED. $2 to Thomas. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Bequeathments committee: All seniors are leaving. All things must go.<br />
Tim's guitar is not a committee.<br />
PASSED. $20 to Tim. The 'current senior class' will chair.<br />
<br />
Tim's Guitar Committee: Marlena wants Tim's guitar.<br />
change all guitar to guiTAR. FAILED<br />
Change all Tim to "Tim". DONE<br />
Tortellini<br />
Change all guitar to "guitar". DONE<br />
change all committee to "committee". FAILED<br />
change all "" to ''. DONE<br />
Change airquotes to airguitars. DONE (but ineffectual)<br />
change all air backticks to air mattress. FAILED.<br />
PASSED. $3 to tvaughan. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Announcements.<br />
THERE'S STILL AN EVENT. It's still Mafia Night. You should still show up to the black chairs at 5:00 on wednesday.<br />
<br />
Pay owed money before the end of the year!<br />
<br />
Schmucks.<br />
<br />
Tortellini.<br />
<br />
Ravioli.<br />
<br />
Macaroni.<br />
<br />
Ungolient.<br />
<br />
Broman is lucky accordians are hard to carry.<br />
<br />
Motion to Purple and GTFO.<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130513&diff=7905Minutes201305132016-04-27T15:04:18Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>This is not a meeting. It's a KGB Fireside Chat.<br />
<br />
Officer Reports<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
Had a weekend<br />
They've been increasing in resemblance to weekends.<br />
Done! Has to grade tomorrow, but doesn't have to think to do that, just judge.<br />
If you put dead people by a fire, they burn.<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
Had a four years.<br />
Approx. 23 minutes ago, submitted thesis!<br />
Now has to clean up her studio and turn in her keys<br />
New People:<br />
Owen Kahn. CS Major. From Portland, Maine. Has normal number of fingers and toes.<br />
JRAM<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Began on thursday, when he took his final finals and turned 21.<br />
No event! It's Summer! Unofficial meetings will be on Mondays at 5:30.<br />
Marlena<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Something about new bike fenders.<br />
Probably went climbing at some point.<br />
Went to chicagoland to hang out with her dad.<br />
Having a rad time, will be back tuesday.<br />
Zora<br />
Had a weekend<br />
Weekend started at 11:30 on Friday, when 112 was over.<br />
After that wandered around aimlessly for like 20 minutes.<br />
And then goofed off all weekend.<br />
Dillon<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Actually cared about finals?<br />
Mike<br />
Had a weekend.<br />
Involved not studying, not quite finishing portal 2, and good food.<br />
<br />
Committee Reports<br />
<br />
Daniel John Is So Full of Himself Committee:<br />
Ran fastest mile in months 8:40, lifted weights, came here.<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee:<br />
Pineapple is tasty<br />
<br />
Kirby & McGinnis Variety Hour:<br />
Has full attendance for the summer!<br />
<br />
Spoken Song lyrics Committee reprises it's first report:<br />
Jesse's girl.<br />
Something about sex.<br />
Y'all can look it up.<br />
<br />
Misappropriated Alchoholist Committee:<br />
Resisting urge to make cake squared<br />
<br />
Bequeathment Committee<br />
Committee for Inappropriate and Awkward Musical Accompanyment: Estelle<br />
Evil Seafood League: Xander<br />
Dramatic Speech Committee: bubbles -> tvaughan -> bubbles -> jack<br />
Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee: No one, it doesn't exist. <br />
stallingstallingstalling<br />
Thomas gives everything horrible, gross, and filibustery to Victor<br />
Rate committee: JRAM<br />
Penultimate Frisbee Committee: Dillon and Will<br />
dkirby's committees: Brian<br />
Chicken Dance Committee: Caroline<br />
Rhetorical Question Committee: Broman<br />
<br />
ad hoc Ping Pong Committee:<br />
pew, pew, PEW<br />
<br />
Chicken Dance Committee:<br />
Ackoodlydoo, ackoodlydoo!<br />
<br />
Thomas: Point of order is specifically asking the chair a question.<br />
<br />
Fonzie:<br />
AAAAAA is how I answered every multiple choice question.<br />
<br />
Old Business<br />
The Thing! Stephen is not responsible for sticking a superball in the middle of the Thing during the summer<br />
<br />
New Business<br />
Self Fulfilling Prophecy Committee: to create the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee and make tvaughan a chair<br />
purpose changed to "to create the Self Fulfilling Prophecy Committee" DONE<br />
title changed to "the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee" DONE<br />
Committee for Inappropriate and Awkward Musical Accompaniments reports<br />
PASSED. $5 to McGinnis. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Make Mcginnis Pay 5 More Dollars Committee: to create the Staring Dramatically Out the Window Committee<br />
question called<br />
PASSED. $5 to McGinnis. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Bizzarely Worded Signs committee: There's a sign in the room that says "push here, alarm will sound."<br />
"Slow Children"<br />
Inflammable means flammable, what is wrong with this country<br />
Imperadiction: imperitive statement and prediction<br />
"Beware of Dogz"<br />
"No right on red while crosswalk is occupied"<br />
"Beware of safety"<br />
"Stop"<br />
"Left turn yield to thru traffic"<br />
"do not drink out of the urinals"<br />
sin: the derivative of -cos<br />
tvaughn: AUDGHAGH<br />
TVAUGHAN exits.<br />
Tortellini<br />
PASSED. $2 to Thomas. Disbanded.<br />
<br />
Inappropriate and Awkward Jewsical Accompaniment Committee: To find the most inappopriate and awkward times to play and dance the Horah<br />
McGinnis does not make a holocaust joke<br />
append to purpose "have Adam just stand next to you and look at you" DONE<br />
"Crikey! Welcome to Israel!"<br />
PASSED. $2 to Bubbles. Xander chairs.<br />
<br />
Announcements<br />
<br />
NOPE<br />
<br />
Normal meetings will resume at 4:30 on the first monday of the semester!<br />
<br />
Schmucks<br />
<br />
Tortellini<br />
<br />
Guild of Calamitous intent is still recruiting and has more positions open due to the annexing of the evil seafood league<br />
Talk to Xander if you're interested in the lower regions of the alignment chart.<br />
Like the butt?<br />
<br />
Chris Hatfield is coming back from space! Hopefully he survived the landing.<br />
<br />
Thanks for a cool four years!<br />
--Seniors<br />
<br />
We are in purple.<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130826&diff=7904Minutes201308262016-04-26T04:59:19Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
had a summer<br />
spent it working for Explo, where they make and sell cheap cameras<br />
guy sat down on a bench, got an awkward picture on either side of the arch<br />
which was basically how his summer went<br />
came back to pittsburgh, got wisdom teeth taken out<br />
on vicodin RIGHT NOW<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
still having a summer<br />
worked in Erie during the week and stayed in Pittsburgh on the weekends<br />
Exec stuff<br />
contact us on fb<br />
exec meetings happen at the UC caffee (that room on the second floor near the elevators) Thursdays at 5:30<br />
New People!<br />
(name, major, where from, uninteresting fact)<br />
Sophia, CS, Bay Area, CA, not a very interesting persom<br />
Charlotte, Biology, Southeast PA, has a cat<br />
Skye, MechE and BME, Washington, D.C., favorite color is blue<br />
Alex, CS, Long Island, is a CS major<br />
Dan, CS, Milwaukee, WI, also has another dog<br />
Rudina, ECE and BME, Kosovo, likes watching tv<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a summer<br />
spent his time being gainfully unemployed<br />
won a lot of games and trivia<br />
EVENT<br />
Potluck!<br />
Meet at 5:45 at the black chairs in the UC, then walk to Flagstaff Hill<br />
there will be frizbee, food, and drink<br />
upperclassmen should bring food, freshmen should just show up<br />
KGB provides drinks, don't bring drinks<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a summer<br />
spent days designing in a box and nights playing board games<br />
In the middle of a ten hour class day, and still has lots of energy<br />
this will not be the case later in the year<br />
PRAVDA?!<br />
there is one! in a COLLEGE folder!<br />
Pravda? is made of mostly user submitted content<br />
submit to mnabraha@andrew.cmu.edu<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a summer<br />
guesses he worked a job, guesses he also made tshirts<br />
also did accounting, but that's not as fun<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a summer<br />
Painted houses with their right arm<br />
fell off a bike<br />
proceeded to paint houses with their left arm<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
had a summer<br />
worked in a bio lab with lots of minions<br />
killed most of the minions and poured cyanide down the drain<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
<br />
Tortellini Committee reports: Tortellini<br />
<br />
Guild of Calamitous Intent reports: Overwhelming Success<br />
<br />
Dickens Committee reports: [reads something], 1/5<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee reports: The Spectacular Now: [reads a recipe, y'all can look it up]<br />
<br />
V. S. Wolf Memorial Committee reports: What do you call a monkey wit a time bomb? A baBOOM!<br />
<br />
Time Travel Committee: Would like to nominate tbroman for president<br />
<br />
horsebooks Committee reports: mulch MULCH<br />
<br />
Chicken Dance Committee reports: [presumably an Arrested Development reference?]<br />
<br />
Don't Worry It's For Science Committee reports: that pain you'll be feeling in 2 hrs is normal, don't worry<br />
<br />
Buggy Everyday Committee reports: Soon.<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
<br />
The Thing!<br />
Freshmen not finding class is not Skittles' fault.<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
<br />
Committee to Test the Memory of Exec: CHALLENGE!<br />
eforney: postpone until the first Monday in February, 2015?<br />
the challenge will go through either way<br />
objection: without the committe, how will we remember the committe in 2015?<br />
PASSED, committee postponed until the first Monday in February, 2015<br />
<br />
Committee to Make Sure That the Test to Test the Memory of Exec [garble mumble]: to uphold the test of memory of exec<br />
The Can You Repeat That In Song Committee reports:<br />
Skittles: [singing] ~something something test~<br />
motion to table<br />
FAILED<br />
motion to postpone until this February<br />
motion to set the date in February to the exec meeting (first thursday?)<br />
NOT FRIENDLY<br />
motion to pick any day in February<br />
FRIENDLY<br />
motion to use a computer to randomly to pick a day<br />
no<br />
eforney regrets setting precedent<br />
motion to the left<br />
we are now in purple<br />
motion to remain in motion whilst an outside force acts upon us<br />
PASSED, committee postponed until the first Monday in February, 2014<br />
<br />
Sergents Secret Police Committee: please speak loudly and have interesting and animmated discussions so the people listening in on your conversations don't get board<br />
motion to change title to the Mike Woolford Secret Police Committee<br />
PASSED<br />
append to the purpose: and always carry a small stick<br />
PASSED<br />
change title to The Dread Lord mwoolfor's Secret Police Committee<br />
PASSED<br />
change "small stick" to "big stick" in purpose<br />
FAILED<br />
append bug mars<br />
to what<br />
out of order<br />
PASSED<br />
$3 to ethan. DISBANDED<br />
<br />
Maximum Big Committee: prove that natural numbers have an upper bound<br />
anbrown: motion to disprove by lengthy proof on the board<br />
point of order: it's currently set to m for maximum, it should be set to w for wumbo<br />
MATH MATH MATH MATH MATH JACKS VAN SPORTS<br />
change all instances of "big" in the name and purpose to "bidness"<br />
PASSED<br />
change all instances of "natural" to "unnatural"<br />
FAILED<br />
motion to add 1 to the committee name in order to create a counter example<br />
eforney: how many is a brazilian?<br />
change all instances of Natural to Supernatural<br />
PASSED<br />
$5 to mcginnis, he chairs.<br />
Name and purpose now Maximum Bidness Committee: Prove that supernatural numbers have an upper bound<br />
<br />
Save Exec From 251 Committee:<br />
NO<br />
<br />
Military Awards and Titles Committee: for the duration of the current exec add Grand mwof to the Segeant at Arms title<br />
change grand to graham cracker<br />
FAILED<br />
change grand to bug mars<br />
FAILED<br />
jump the shark and change grand to bug mars<br />
egladdin: it was better in the first season<br />
FAILED<br />
it is a scientific fact that we are all bug mars<br />
PASSED<br />
$2 to drew, Oren will chair<br />
<br />
Upkeep of Places That Don't Exist Committee: check on all new doors around campus<br />
(there are some new locks)<br />
change "upkeep" to "untap" in title<br />
PASSED<br />
change purpose to build a mountain on top of wean like that one guy in China<br />
PASSED<br />
change "untap" to "draw" in title<br />
FAILED<br />
change the title to the "Let's Fuck Over the Freshmen Committee"<br />
we'll say that failed<br />
aorenste: fun fact: if you go between the A and B basements of Mudge you'll find a place where reality is thin and you can experience interplanar travel<br />
Skittles will be perfectly honest, he still doesn't understand what buying more tangerines means<br />
It's an economic philosophy<br />
PASSED<br />
$3 to caroline: anybody who can tunnel will chair<br />
Name and purpose now Untap of Places That Don't Exist Committee: Build a mountain on top of Wean like that one guy in China<br />
<br />
Name of This Committe: What it's purpose will be<br />
change title to name of this committe committee<br />
PASSED<br />
witty remark<br />
change purpose to purpose of this committee<br />
FAILED<br />
change title to Bill the Cat<br />
FAILED<br />
computer science joke<br />
violent objection (out of order)<br />
change "this" to "that" in the name and purpose<br />
PASSED<br />
append name of change of purpose to name<br />
nope<br />
unfunny statement<br />
motion to append to the purpose "and torture rec sec"<br />
PASSED<br />
((joke's on you, suckers, I kept up with this one really well))<br />
append "funny hats" to the purpose<br />
PASSED<br />
PASSED<br />
$2 to Alex, you will chair (you = tbroman)<br />
Name and purpose now Name of That Committee Committee: What it's purpose will be and torture the rec sec. Also appended: funny hats<br />
<br />
KGB Rocks the 80s Committee: [short, failed keytar playing]<br />
keytars appended to purpose<br />
ccolombo: you can buy it... on itunes<br />
motion to don't start unbelieveing<br />
append crazy train to the purpose<br />
FRIENDLY<br />
mashup crazy train with purpose<br />
FRIENDLY<br />
motion to business up front of purpose, party in back<br />
friendly?<br />
motion to append [better keytar playing] to the purpose<br />
friendly<br />
$3 to JRAM, anyone currently holding keyboard or keytar will chair<br />
<br />
Freshmen Awareness Committee: Educate Freshmen and Other New Members<br />
append "only after terribly confusing them" to the purpose<br />
PASSED<br />
Freshmen can at any time request a report from the What Are You Referencing Committee<br />
The response will most likely not be helpful<br />
append to purpose "and make freshmen aware of how unaware they are"<br />
PASSED<br />
motion to go back to the way middle school was where everything was sunshine and rainbows<br />
the Uncomfortably Friendly Committe approves wholeheartedly<br />
$6 to skittles, DISBANDED<br />
<br />
Motion to make an allocation not exceeding $50 for next week's event<br />
PASSED<br />
<br />
Hat committe: give KGB exec lice<br />
The Don't Worry It's For Science Committee approves<br />
change title to "exec plays a hat based roleplaying game [etc]":<br />
dilatory<br />
are we playing tf2 now?<br />
egladdin: CMU is a school themed hat simulator<br />
append "and study epidemiology" to purpose<br />
FAILED<br />
append "and study phrenology" to purpose<br />
FRIENDLY<br />
motion to append one hat to all of exec's heads<br />
SUCCESS<br />
$2 to Drew: DISBANDED<br />
<br />
That Committee: portmanteaus of everything<br />
eforney: I portmantotally approve<br />
point of information: what is a gleef?<br />
A thing we write on the board at the first meeting of every year. That's all the information that Broman has.<br />
the Spontaneous Shark Pun Committee... is waiting<br />
JRAM: ...sorry, tiger<br />
PASSED<br />
$2 to Xander. DISBANDED<br />
<br />
Misplaced Wisdom Committee: ensure exec doesn't go mad with opiates<br />
when Broman got his wisdom teeth out:<br />
eforney escorted him to and from the appointment<br />
He only did one funny thing, which was to point vehemently at a trashcan<br />
it said "are you high"<br />
Xander: at least you've still got your charisma teeth<br />
Skye was under the impression that all of exec and everyone here was on opiates anyway<br />
no; it's just Broman<br />
FAILED<br />
<br />
Fetch Committee: NO STEVEN STOP TRYING TO MAKE FETCH HAPPEN<br />
<br />
Precedent Committee: we shall see<br />
would it be in support of anti seconds?<br />
probably<br />
JRAM: what if we started selling heroin to members<br />
don't worry it's JUST during this committee<br />
change purpose to to "catch JRAM with narcotics"<br />
FRIENDLY<br />
change name to "the trolling committe" and the purpose to "breast cancer research"<br />
nope<br />
Skittles still doesn't know where JRAM got that bag of money...<br />
change title to "President Committee"<br />
FAILED<br />
eforney: "Gainfully Unemployed" [with dramatic airquotes]<br />
The Unneccesary Quotation Marks Committee reports: success<br />
PASSED<br />
$3 to Drew, all past and current residents of the Moon (except for JRAM) will chair<br />
Name and purpose now Precedent Committee: Catch JRAM with narcotics<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
<br />
EVENT!<br />
Potluck!<br />
Friday at 5:45 at the UC black chairs<br />
nonfreshmen should bring food!<br />
If you're bringing food, bring utensils to serve it with!<br />
Also, make an ingredients list for people with allergies! We have lots of allergies!<br />
<br />
The website's been updated!<br />
Pravda?s are available for reading in full color<br />
There will possibly be event updates?<br />
We'll talk about that later<br />
There's an RSS feed!<br />
cmukgb.com<br />
<br />
event next week!<br />
old people who want to tell stories: contact exec!<br />
<br />
DUES<br />
$15/semester, $20/year<br />
you need to pay them in order to participate serious business voting<br />
for example, Booth, ammendments to the bylaws, and officer elections<br />
You also get a (usually $5) discount on t-shirts and stuff!<br />
Give your dollars to Dillon and give Zora your andrew ID and what you paid for<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
<br />
accomplished ballerinas in Pittsburgh should talk to Xander in the next few hours!<br />
<br />
There's a movie showing on Flagstaff on Wednesday after sundown!<br />
Avengers this week!<br />
it's free!<br />
Upperclassmen can tell you where Flagstaff Hill is<br />
<br />
talk to JRAM, Xander, and/or Broman about running puzzlehunt<br />
<br />
GTFO<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130902&diff=7903Minutes201309022016-04-26T04:57:10Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved like 12 hours of magic and an hour of ITR and maybe 6 hours of diplomacy (7 hours?)<br />
did some other stuff that wasn't work<br />
still not doing work tonight because Bubbles invited him to play fantasy football<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a week<br />
on the weekend got dressed up super fancy and went to a burger joint where the servers were REALLY confused<br />
fell over laughing about spaghetti at one point<br />
new people!<br />
(Name, Major, place of origin, uninteresting fact)<br />
Spencer, vocal performance, Vancouver, enjoys riding bikes<br />
Victoria, architecture, new jersey, has skin the color of pancake batter<br />
Melvin, architecture, Johto region, is yellow<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
invented a game called Dodge Frisbee, AKA You Should Be Running Why Aren't You Running<br />
also other things such as ITR and How to Brutally Betray Your Team Members in Halo<br />
EVENT!<br />
Underground tour<br />
Friday, 7:30, UC Black Chairs<br />
dress inconspicuously!<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a weekend<br />
started with the event<br />
then woke up real early and went downtown and played games with strangers<br />
some of the games may appear at events in the future!<br />
didn't go to itr because she was exhausted after running for 10 hours<br />
watched Wall-E instead<br />
played...something on Sunday<br />
no one submitted to Pravda?, so there isn't a Pravda? this week!<br />
submit art, poems, writing!<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend!<br />
Did homework, a lot of homework, but not enough homework, and cleaned the kitchen<br />
Feels accomplished even if they aren't sure anything actually got accomplished<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend a weekend<br />
went to the event (that was fun)<br />
participated in Dodge Frisbee (arguably less fun)<br />
played diplomacy on Sunday (again, arguably less fun)<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
is not Mike<br />
had a weekend<br />
played ITR, knows that because Dan was there<br />
after that there's just a mysterious haze<br />
pretty sure Dan bought a bike<br />
he is now in the cult<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
<br />
Ditto Committee: elekid!<br />
<br />
Untap of Places that Don't Exist Committee: Wean is more defendable for CtFwS because the exits on 3 and 4 no longer exist<br />
<br />
Whatever tvauhan's Mashup Committee Was: reports with Gangnam Train<br />
<br />
Bike Committee: welcomes its new members, dkirby and Spencer. They'll find you.<br />
<br />
Misappropriated We So White Committee: thank you<br />
<br />
Misappropriated Bike Committee: soon?<br />
<br />
Name of That Committee Committee: this is a report<br />
<br />
Committee to Assassinate the President: FIRE<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee: initial foray to Stacks was 2/3 successful.<br />
Reccommends the Long Island Iced Tea but not whatever that blue one was<br />
<br />
Committee to Not Split Infinitives: Failure<br />
<br />
ad hoc Comittee to Prevent West Wing's Fire Alarm From Going Off: Failure<br />
<br />
ad hoc Latin is a Dead Language Would You Please Stop Using It Committee: Failure<br />
<br />
LATIN WORDS Committee: reports<br />
<br />
ad hoc French Words: French should be the semi-oficcial language of the KGB because French was actually used in Russia<br />
<br />
ad hoc Ukranian Committee: We should just go all the way back and use Ukranian as our official language<br />
<br />
'Murica Committee: Is not happy with any of this.<br />
<br />
ad hoc Russian Words: RUSSIAN WORDS ((it seemed unhappy, but that might just be Russian))<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
<br />
The Thing<br />
Alex has thing<br />
Stupid things he does are not his fault this week<br />
<br />
The Committee Which Will Take 7 Years to Pass: to take 7 years to pass<br />
motion to postpone for 7 more years?<br />
we've gone about this REALLY hastily!<br />
motion to call Glisson and tell him to get his butt over here<br />
out of order<br />
eforney is definitely both older and taller than McGinnis<br />
proposal withdrawn<br />
change all instances of "pass" to "pass gas"<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to "take 7 lightyears to pass"<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to "to have passed 7 years ago"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "pass" to "fail"<br />
FAILS<br />
motion to postpone for 7 years<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "7" to "8"<br />
FAILS<br />
motion to stop asking about the number 7<br />
only 90s kids will get this joke<br />
PASSES<br />
$50 to Margaret, Margaret and Evan Danaher will chair<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
<br />
The Committee That Will Pass 7 Days From Now: to pass 7 days from now<br />
sooooooon<br />
change purpose to "to have passed 7 days ago"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name to "The Committee That Will Pass 7 Years From Now", purpose to "eught"<br />
PASSES<br />
The Committee to Test the Rec Sec approves<br />
motion to postpone for 7 years<br />
we should use next largest prime number (11)<br />
if it's not on a Monday, the next meeting afterwards<br />
changed to the time of the postponement to 7 years, rounded to the nearest Monday<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "days" to "wonders"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "years" to "wonders"<br />
PASSES<br />
change purpose to "to have passed 7 wonders ago"<br />
PASSES<br />
PASSES<br />
$7 to Drew, ccolombo will chair<br />
Name and purpose now: "The Committee That Will Pass 7 Wonders From Now: to have passed 7 wonders ago"<br />
<br />
The 2 Armies Problem Sabotoge Committee: To make sure the peace treaty between the loyalists and the rebels never gets to its destination<br />
change name to "Sidewalk Loyalists Committee" and purpose to "to get rid of rebel scum"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "rebels" to "bells"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "bells" to "hell"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "scum" to "bugmars"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "hells" to "humans"<br />
PASSES<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to drew, DISBANDED THE REBELS WILL TRIUMPH<br />
<br />
Sidewalk Rebels Committee<br />
dilatory<br />
<br />
Committee With a Different End: Committees used to fail in interesting ways. Then we made more money off more interesting committees. See, this one's not interesting<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
Quantum Mechanics Committee: to travel through time, righting all wrongs<br />
motion to indefinitely postpone so the committee doesn't collapse into a single state<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
The Committee to Take it Easy on the Rec Sec: EVIL LAUGHTER<br />
change each "ha" to "bugmars"<br />
PASSES<br />
change each successive syllable to the next odd number<br />
PASSES<br />
change each nth odd number to each nth Mersenne prime<br />
PASSES<br />
PASSES<br />
$6 to Victoria, Melvin will chair<br />
Name and purpose now: Fuck you figure it out yourself<br />
<br />
Quantum Mechanics Union: to ensure wellbeing of all those who work on quanta<br />
something something bugmars<br />
motion to measure the speed of this committee<br />
PASSES, good luck<br />
fuck you scott walker<br />
change all instances of "union" to "intersection"<br />
change all instances of "intersection" to "anion"<br />
motion to measure the position of the committee<br />
in the shop?<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Skittles, McGinnis will chair<br />
<br />
Motion to allocate $150 for the next two events!<br />
It's more than usual because food for the Underground Tour is expensive<br />
Vegetarian count: 3<br />
you can absolutely get your burger without cheese<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
The Out of Order Committee<br />
fails for lack of a purpose<br />
<br />
The Real-tea Party: throwing tea into bodies of water<br />
change purpose to "to sell houses"<br />
PASSES<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Skittles, eforney will chair<br />
<br />
The SAT Prep Committee: to give the KGB a vocab word of the day<br />
change name to "The 3SAT Prep Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of the letter "t" to "a drink with jam and bread"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "vocabulary words" to "math problems"<br />
FAILS<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to eforney, linguists will chair (which is to say everyone)<br />
Name and purpose now: "a drink with jam and breadhe 3SAa drink with jam and bread Prep Commia drink with jam and breada drink with jam and breadee:<br />
a drink with jam and breado give a drink with jam and breadhe KGB a vocab word of a drink with jam and breadhe day"<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
<br />
EVENT!<br />
Underground Tour<br />
UC Black Chairs, Friday, 7:30 p.m.<br />
learn all the dark secrets of CMU<br />
dress inconspicuously<br />
Posters!<br />
take some and put them places!<br />
or, print some out and put them in places ON CAMPUS<br />
you can find them at cmukgb.org, on the propaganda page<br />
try not to put more than 1 on any one bulletin board<br />
interesting placements are good, bad placements are bad<br />
<br />
puzzlehunt planning meeting<br />
Porter A19, Tuesday, 9:30 pm<br />
actual Puzzlehunt will be on Oct 12!<br />
<br />
pay your dues!<br />
$20/year, $15/semester<br />
they make you a real voting member, able to vote on real important stuff!<br />
also you get discounts on tshirts<br />
Pay Dillon then give Zora your andrewID<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
<br />
Steven is missing a nerf gun! (Nevermind, we found it)<br />
<br />
Activities Fair<br />
Wednesday at 4:30 on the CFA lawn<br />
everyone should go, but especially freshmen<br />
you can learn about all the student organizations<br />
all the buggy orgs will be there<br />
<br />
motion to purple and getfood<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130909&diff=7902Minutes201309092016-04-26T04:56:47Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
it began with the Underground Tour<br />
went around campus and told things that were true, no, really<br />
on Saturday there was some stuff, and then some work, and then some more stuff that night<br />
10 hrs after that had training for community standards boards<br />
serving on academic review boards<br />
could potentially be called on to judge cases about people tresspassing where they don't belong<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a weekend<br />
Underground Tour!<br />
then shifting in and out of existance<br />
then taking it slow because she came down with a cold<br />
then some work today<br />
new people<br />
(name, major, origin, uninteresting fact)<br />
Rasaundra, math, Baltimore, is quiet<br />
Chris, ECE, San Fransisco, wears clothes<br />
Kelsey, Kingston PA, writing, also wears clothes<br />
Shoshana, BXA Music and Psych, Cleaveland, plays the oboe<br />
Evans, ECE, California, brown hair<br />
David, Mech E, Chicago, has spent majority of his life breathing<br />
Miranda, Art, Roosevelt Island NY, has all fingers and toes<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
went on the Underground Tour and that was fun<br />
did other things that were also fun<br />
then got caught in the maelstrom of homework and disease<br />
EVENT!<br />
Get Board Get Carded<br />
7 pm, Friday, Porter A18*<br />
go, to avoid getting eaten by a Drew<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a weekend<br />
the floor is suspiciously wet<br />
went on the Underground Tour and wore a top hat<br />
ran into things, because she forgot that top hats give you +1 feet<br />
got caught in maelstrom of work, though not disease<br />
realized half of work maybe was not necessary<br />
PRAVDA?!<br />
Bait and Switch edition<br />
each one is gonna have a theme so you'll submit stuff 'cause you have more ideas<br />
next week is Hocus Pocus edition<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend<br />
went on the Underground Tour, where they sprinted back and forth and yelled and sprinted and then lay down in the grass<br />
did work (but not enough work) on Saturday and Sunday<br />
this will be a theme<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend<br />
Didn't go on the Underground Tour because he went to Penn Apps<br />
didn't place top 3 but won lots of secondary awards<br />
wrote real time lecture service thing for professors<br />
has lots of work and is sick<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
had a weekend<br />
got sick<br />
moped on the comfy couch a lot<br />
didn't do work on Saturday<br />
is still sick<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
<br />
ad hoc Committee to Stalk Past Presidents: Jared got a job offer from google! Sooooo maybe he'll be back?<br />
<br />
The Daniel John Kirby is So Full Of Himself Committee: also Underground Tour'd and was told to speak up...which has NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE<br />
<br />
ad hoc Committee for Continuing Traditions I've Never Heard Of: Skye is getting baggers and is open to confuse a bagger<br />
Confuse a Bagger is a story we didn't tell on the Underground Tour this year, but it's worth telling<br />
(because it's hilarious)<br />
<br />
ad hoc Rats on Venetian Trade Ships Committee: success<br />
<br />
The Committee to Not Burn Down Roselawn 7 and a bunch of other shit and the Spoken Song Lyrics Committee: sexy dj, etc.<br />
Party at R7 on Saturday at 9:00 PM!<br />
<br />
ad hoc Oh No Booth! Committee: CMU might build a Tepper building in the Morewood parking lot?<br />
Apparently they might move booth to the Cut<br />
<br />
Assassins Committee: fuck you<br />
<br />
The Protracted Exploration of Pittsburgh Committee: 2 counts of success and one count of inferred success<br />
<br />
possibly ad hoc, possibly misappropriated CMU Hates Grass Committee: Booth on Cut? Interesting...<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee: endorses the chocotaco milkshake<br />
<br />
Derpy Crane Committee: derpy crane<br />
<br />
misappropriated Cullinary R&D Committee: failure and tears<br />
the mead?<br />
no, that worked great<br />
<br />
Time Travel Committee: would like to nominate Glisson for President<br />
<br />
Storytelling Committee: CMU is hard.<br />
Y'all are smart. Everyone is smart. It's challenging!<br />
It's okay to ask for help--everyone here does, and no one will think less of you.<br />
There are lots of resources! Including us!<br />
Talk to us, we're friendly.<br />
CMU is hard, feel free to ask for help if you need it.<br />
<br />
ad hoc This Will Make Sense Later Committee: soon<br />
<br />
Airship Piracy Committee: reports<br />
<br />
Marionnette Committee: the floor is lava<br />
<br />
Floor is Lava Committee: success<br />
<br />
ad hoc Derpy Origami Heart Committee: reports<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
the Thing<br />
getting a cold not Caroline's fault<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
<br />
Sliding Innuendos Committee: trombones and sackbuts<br />
sackbuts are Renaissance trombones<br />
Charlie Brown Committee: Wo wahwowah wo wahwowah<br />
sackbut<br />
now we know what a sackbut is<br />
change all instances of sack to snack<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of sackbut to bugmars<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of but to butmars<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of but to fanny<br />
FAILS<br />
lookit dat ass<br />
hats n kitties, hats hats n kitties<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Drew, tromboners will chair!<br />
Title and purpose now: Sliding Innuendos Committee: Trombones and Sackbutmars<br />
<br />
684th Beating of a Dead Horse: change the names and purposes of committees<br />
change all instances of 684 to 685<br />
PASSES<br />
change all words and numbers with bugmars<br />
passes, but that doesn't make sense, so no<br />
change "dead horse" to "mostly dead horse"<br />
that's torture, are you sure (yes)<br />
PASSES<br />
change "685" to "686"<br />
PASSES<br />
change "horse" to "donkey"<br />
FAILS<br />
change "dead" to "dan"<br />
PASSES<br />
append a "w" before "horse"<br />
nope, that would actually be prepending<br />
prepend a "w" before "horse"<br />
dilatory<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Drew, anyone able to increment will chair<br />
Name and purpose now: "686th Beating of a Mostly Dan Horse Committee: To change the names and purposes of committeees"<br />
<br />
Motion to Cremate the Grandmother Committee: everyone messes up with their speech sometimes<br />
change purpose to freudian slips<br />
PASSES<br />
Monty Python Committee: I'm not dead yet<br />
ad hoc Committee with the Guy Pushing the Cart: well you will be, and he's not coming around again 'til next tuesday.<br />
$1 to Mcginnis, anyone who's ever sold a grandma will chair<br />
<br />
Committe to Snipe Your High Five: hey rglenn high five<br />
the Fistbump R&D Committee approves<br />
change action in purpose to hair smoothing<br />
FAILS<br />
motion to touch eforney's hand<br />
and that's how we all get disease<br />
ad hoc Drew's Driving Committee: guyssss I'm trying to drive<br />
sorry<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Marlena, whoever sniped the last high five will chair<br />
<br />
Committee to Determine What Woodland Creatures Utter: to discover ~what the fuck's sake~<br />
what kind of elephant says toot?<br />
((I don't know what happened here, google the video or something))<br />
tortellini<br />
ad hoc My Family Does Things That I Do and It's Kind Of Weird Committee: Marlena's aunt sent this to her entire family, including her grandmother, which is not her grandmother's cup of tea, apparently<br />
the fox obviously communicates in or, or, or, or, ors<br />
ad hoc Committee to Dedisnify the Fox and the Hound approves<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to drew (twoingliss), eforney will chair<br />
<br />
Plague Hats Committee: [give a hat] and also warn people about the horrors of head lice<br />
lookin' at you JRAM<br />
change to name to "brain slug committee":<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "head lice" to "dread lice"<br />
PASSES<br />
change instances of "dread lice" to "dreads lice"<br />
FAILS<br />
change instances of "dread" to "judge dread"<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "hat" to "headwear" in purpose:<br />
PASSES<br />
you get a hat if you buy the committee<br />
PASSES<br />
$5 to Maija, people who are wearing a hat or have had headlice due to to the KGB's actions in the past will chair<br />
<br />
Thoughtful KGB Committee: only pass committees we think are worth buying and not just listen to our facist dictator and do the first thing he says<br />
change purpose to "do what our dictator says"<br />
FAILS<br />
change all words in the name and purpose to "Tim Broman"<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to instate Xander as dictator<br />
dilatory<br />
broman has the armies<br />
Sliding Innuendos Committee: hee hee dictator<br />
change all instances of "Tim" to "Timmy"<br />
dilatory<br />
change all instances of "Bro" to "Brobro"<br />
dilatory<br />
change all instances of "Broman" to "Bromance"<br />
dilatory<br />
change all instances of "Broman" to "Turner"<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "Broman" to "Brotherman"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "Brotherman" to "nananananananana nananananananana FRATMAN"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "man" to "manman"<br />
no<br />
change all instances of "man" to "man or woman"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all tim to the tim<br />
PASSES<br />
include middle name (robert)<br />
PASSES<br />
change all robert to bobert<br />
PASSES<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
We Did It! Committee: proclaim "We did it!" when we do any reletively mundane and easy tasks<br />
change all instances of "We did it!" to "BOW BEFORE ME, PEASANTS."<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "me" to "us"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name and purpose to "Make a Cheese Pizza Committee: make a cheeze pizza"<br />
dilatory<br />
change all instances of "peasant" to "pheasant":<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "bow" (/baʊ/) to "bow" (/boʊ/):<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "pheasant" to "presence"<br />
FAILS<br />
change all instances of "BOW BEFORE ME, PHEASANTS." to "KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name and purpose to the "Youthful Amnesia Committee: I have no idea what I'm doing or what I've done"<br />
PASSES<br />
append Kelly's memory to purpose so she can remember what's going on<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to change the purpose because dan thinks everything's friendly<br />
PASSES<br />
Overly Friendly Committee: success<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to dkirby, everyone friendly will chair<br />
Name and purpose now: "Youthful Amnesia Committee: Y'all gave me permission to change the purpose soooooooo sackbut"<br />
<br />
This Will Make Sense Later Committee: to have been reported the day it will be created later<br />
you took too long, now youre committee's gone<br />
Time Police Committee: you've been charged a fine of 3 years<br />
$3 to afrieder, everyone will chair<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
<br />
EVENT!<br />
Get Board Get Carded<br />
Friday at 7:00 PM in Porter A18*<br />
bring board games, bring card games, bring drew<br />
<br />
pay your dues!<br />
$15 for semester, $20 for year<br />
you get voting rights on important stuff and discounts on tshirts<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
sackbut<br />
<br />
tortellini<br />
<br />
we are now in purple<br />
<br />
R7 party!<br />
Saturday at 9:00 PM at Roselawn 7<br />
over there by the Hill<br />
<br />
frisbee on Friday before event??<br />
<br />
Dan is thinking of doing a thing with the Borg episodes of Star Trek<br />
Like the Klingon thing he did last year<br />
where they watched a bunch of episodes and then the movie<br />
<br />
Come to the hole in the vacant lot behind the Ralph's<br />
etc<br />
((I think the translation is that Xander wants you to listen to Nightvale))<br />
((Or he's found a Ralph's somewhere in Pittsburgh that he likes to hang out at and he's lonely))<br />
((Either way it's probably in your best interest to avoid the potentially imaginary Ralph's))<br />
<br />
pick up your paper!<br />
<br />
purple and get food<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130912&diff=7901Minutes201309122016-04-26T04:56:10Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Mike<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved sleeping a lot on Saturday because they pulled an all nighter on Thursday/Friday<br />
and then studying on Sunday<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend<br />
event, we sat on our asses<br />
played Two Rooms and a Boom<br />
which was amazing<br />
so amazing he played it again on Sunday<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend<br />
went to the event, left before Two Rooms and a Boom<br />
which is good because they don't really like mafia games<br />
studied on Saturday<br />
studied on Sunday<br />
also last booth meeting of the semester!<br />
went to Two Rooms and a Boom, but just sort of sat and studied<br />
because of aforementioned dislike of mafia games<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a weekend<br />
mostly eating food and event and that thing is happening where she doesn't remember what happened this weekend so<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
decided to take the Putnam at midnight on Friday<br />
realized that half the schools he applied to hadn't received his GRE<br />
and that the GRE seems to have erased all evidence of his existance<br />
EVENT<br />
Geek Eat<br />
Meet Wednesday at 4:00 at the Black Chairs<br />
let JRAM know if you're driving or biking or not going with the general group<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a weekend<br />
started on Friday and looked at all of her things in boxes and managed to move in like two trips!<br />
ANNOUNCEMENT<br />
she is resigning!<br />
because of a badly timed class<br />
jcolmar is the new 1vp!<br />
<br />
James<br />
had a weekend<br />
basically cut out of five different social engagements because of a take home final on how to maintain intimate relationships<br />
yep<br />
<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend sort of<br />
a lot of studying<br />
maybe<br />
has a lot of things in the next 24 hours<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
Time Travel Committee<br />
successful time compression<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Don't Know What Committee This Should Go In<br />
probably Oren's last meeting as a student here<br />
he thanks us<br />
(we'll miss you Oren)<br />
<br />
ad hoc, possibly misappropriated Defectors Committee<br />
where will Oren be going?<br />
Iowa<br />
<br />
ad hoc Continuing Sadness Committee<br />
frieder hopes to see us in the future<br />
<br />
Kirby And McGinnis Variety Hour<br />
half success, half failure<br />
<br />
Snarky Freshmen Committee<br />
adds Frieder as chair<br />
<br />
Sharky Freshmen Committee<br />
adds Skye as chair<br />
<br />
Itty Bitty Kitty Committee<br />
Lincoln adopted a kitten<br />
Gabby the tabby<br />
<br />
Skyentology Committee<br />
sorry for the stuff falling from the sky<br />
<br />
instead of studying, Broman wrote a press release<br />
and is reading it now<br />
no I am not writing it down<br />
it involved geosynchronous orbit, that's important for a later joke<br />
<br />
ad hoc I Wanted To Be An Astronaut When I Was A Child Committee<br />
Marlena wanted to do the floaty thing<br />
<br />
Innovative Technologies Committee<br />
we're working on that kind of geosynchronous orbit<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The Thing!<br />
not being 1vp anymore and finals are not Caroline's fault<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
When I Was A Kid All I Had To Play With Was A Stick And Some Dirt Committee: to find interesting stuff to do with this stick<br />
change "And Some Dirt" to "And Some Chalk"<br />
PASSES<br />
yoga and fighting are the same thing<br />
motion to place quote marks around "Stick"<br />
FAILS<br />
ad hoc Very Bad Ideas Committee: so Caroline thought of making everybody wheat and making that the scythe<br />
but no<br />
bad idea<br />
motion to knight the new First VP<br />
out of order<br />
$2 to Frieder, whoever holds the talking stick will chair<br />
<br />
Order Of Out Committee: out to be of order<br />
change name to "Out Of Order"<br />
PASSES<br />
how does this committee feel about that sign in the number garden?<br />
pretty good<br />
we share joke we are friends now<br />
Oren said a thing, all eforney heard was butt out<br />
$13 to McGinnis, he and this gentleman and the current president shall chair<br />
(I don't know who he gestured to sorry)<br />
<br />
motion to night the First VP<br />
how does he feel about this?<br />
eh<br />
what comes with the nighting privileges?<br />
nighthood<br />
Committee To Be A Troll And Collaborate With The Recsec: success<br />
Frieder is gonna be Broman<br />
he's growing up<br />
does he get a squire?<br />
only if the motion passes<br />
also all of this is dilatory<br />
will he get a squirrel?<br />
is mayonaise an instrument?<br />
<br />
Committee To Get Us Back Into The Discussion Of Something Proper: being fulfilled at this very moment<br />
change all "proper" to "vulgar"<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to replace the name of this committee with the name of this committee<br />
dilatory<br />
(thank you)<br />
PASSES I guess<br />
$5 to McGinnis, he and eforney will chair<br />
<br />
Hypnosis Committee: to pay Marlena's college tuition<br />
Frieder will pay her college tuition<br />
Rory hears we'll all be paying Marlena's tuition<br />
wake up! wake up now!<br />
change name to "Hip Hop Nosis"<br />
PASSES<br />
hypnosis isn't a TM<br />
motion to cloture<br />
PASSES<br />
the question has been called<br />
PASSES<br />
$6 to Marlena, whoever pays her tuition will chair (in this case her parents and the government)<br />
<br />
Metritization Of Seconds Committee: to quantify how strong a second is<br />
antistone<br />
Stuart's gonna SLUG you for that pun<br />
does this mean a minute is equal to a strong second?<br />
no<br />
ad hoc Advocates Of Base Twelve Committee: displeased with this motion<br />
Skyentology Committee: hasn't been using SI units for years<br />
motion to switch KGB to the imperial system<br />
dilatory<br />
motion to change KGB's system to one invented by us, in which we measure a foot based on the current president's foot<br />
no<br />
motion to change SI to Soviet Units<br />
we don't have that power<br />
motion to reflect on the fact that we're having a discussion about which type of units is better<br />
dilatory, but successful<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
Geek Eat, meet at 4:00 at the UC black chairs<br />
bring cash<br />
<br />
sweatshirts'll be here at the beginning of next semester<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
nope<br />
<br />
we are now in purple<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130916&diff=7900Minutes201309162016-04-26T04:55:40Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
there was the event, which was good<br />
R7 party on saturday was a lot of fun<br />
there's an email where he can tell us about that?<br />
did work on Sunday<br />
the Packers beat the Redskins<br />
which is HILARIOUS because Bubbles is in town<br />
didn't do enough work on 210<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved the first 3 things that Broman's did<br />
it was a lot like Broman's weekend<br />
spent a lot of time with Broman and Caroline this weekend<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved similar things (event and r7 party)<br />
r7 party proceeded without incedent...<br />
worked a lot on compilers but not enough<br />
EVENT<br />
Running Jumping Climbing Trees (Drew)<br />
Friday, 6:30, Flagstaff<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
Submit to pravda!<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend<br />
was sick for half of it, couldn't talk for all of it<br />
maybe it's still the weekend since they still can't really talk<br />
(it's not the weekend)<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend<br />
see Broman's weekend except with different games at GBGC<br />
also still has a lot of work<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved playing card games<br />
catan ended bitterly<br />
got on a bus for 6 hours to grandmother's house<br />
ate too much grandmother food, which is really good food<br />
drove back for only 5 hours<br />
(got a new car)<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORTS<br />
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists: There's a window open at the top of the black tower at the edge of town<br />
<br />
Benjamin S Wolf Memorial Committee: before the age of the internet & telegraph, people communicated through psychics.<br />
someone wanted to talk to their dead father...<br />
it was glaive pun<br />
fuck everything<br />
<br />
Committee to Warn President of Impending Doom: Xander is prepared.<br />
Xander is REALLY prepared.<br />
<br />
Committee to Assassinate the President: incredible potential<br />
<br />
Daniel John Secret Southerner Committee: offroading in geagle parking lot is possible<br />
<br />
KGB Rocks the 80s Committee: music!<br />
<br />
ad hoc KGB Music Awards: nominates JRAM<br />
<br />
ad hoc Don't Worry It's For Science Committee: approves whatever R7 was drinking last weekend<br />
<br />
ad hoc Alternative History Moonshine Committee: he blinded me with science<br />
<br />
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists reports an edit: A tower has appeared at the edge of town (it repels bone. not flesh. bone)<br />
<br />
All of dkirby's committees, as well as the Committee to Explore Pittsburgh, some other ones, and the Bolth Committee: dkirby went running and cycling this weekend. both<br />
<br />
Benjamin S. Wolf Memorial Committee: foreshadowing pun<br />
<br />
misappropriated Spontanious Shark Puns Committee: requests a report<br />
<br />
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists reports a further clarification: tower coming out of GIANT EARTH BEAST'S face. There's weeping coming from the window<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee: made 2 new tasty drinks, doesn't remember what they were<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The Thing<br />
everything that isn't Skye's fault isn't Skye's fault this week<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
Committee to Pee in Mike's Car: to at least give some good reason for the smell<br />
what if the seats are made out of jellyfish tentacles<br />
change name and purpose to "Establishment of a New Public Restroom Committee: to pee in Mikes car"<br />
PASSED<br />
motion to replace all the fabric in Mike's car with jellyfish tentacles<br />
out of order<br />
change all instances of "Mikes car" to "my scar"<br />
FAILS<br />
change all "Mikes car" to "my scarf"<br />
FAILS<br />
Bubbles really wants to pee in Mikes car<br />
change all instances of "Mike's car" to "Jack's van"<br />
PASSES<br />
replace "Jack's van" with "Dan's bike"<br />
FAILS<br />
remove all instances of "in"<br />
FAILS<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Bubbles, Mike's car will chair<br />
<br />
Thomas Wright Memorial Committee: dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks; also, disband all $2 committees<br />
change purpose to "to kill Thomas Wright"<br />
FAILS<br />
change purpose to "wait until Thomas Wright dies and then erect a giant penis statue"<br />
APPENDED<br />
change all instances of "penis" and "dicks" to "bug mars"<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to remove this committee's shirt<br />
motion to remove this committee's pants<br />
Drew's sorry couldn't hit the harmony's, he had performance anxiety<br />
FAILS<br />
<br />
The Society of Intrepid Journalists: would like to report stuff about the tower and the beast (it's gone but the window's still there)<br />
Change name to "The Lovecraftian Filibuster Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
change all instances of "intrepid" to "apathetic"<br />
FAILS<br />
Xander has a talent for something, Bubbles doesn't know what that something is, but it sure is something<br />
motion to replace Xander with jellyfish tentacles<br />
FAILS<br />
motion to get Xander a job at the Tartan<br />
replace all instances of "window" with "the moist demanding chasm of his mouth"<br />
PASSED<br />
change name to "50 Shades of Xander Committee"<br />
PASSED<br />
ABSTAINED<br />
$8 to Drew, JRAM and Drew will chair<br />
<br />
CMU KGB Intrepid Journalism Committee: to get off campus and see the sights<br />
change name to "Freshmen Intervention or Normal People Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name to "KGB Goes on a Kindergarten Field Trip Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
ad hoc KGB is Now in Preschool Committee: will we be having naptime and juice after this?<br />
50 Shades of Xander Committee: need a chaperone?<br />
change purpose to "PUPPIES?"<br />
APPENDED AND STOLEN<br />
what if Broman was Ms. Frizzle<br />
what if that<br />
append "it's so fluffy I'm gonna die" to the purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Caroline, she shall chair--as will anyone who explores and steals puppies for her<br />
<br />
That Sounds Better Than the Original Committee: to create such things as 50 Shades of Xander and the Nightmare Before That Day Where We Were All Really Tired<br />
an oreo milkshake<br />
pride and prejudice and zombies<br />
sense and sensiblility and seamonsters<br />
I can't believe it's not butter<br />
dessert bus two<br />
ghost shark two: urban jaws<br />
electric bugaloo<br />
change name to "Really Bad Movies"<br />
fails<br />
snakes...on every plane!<br />
the squeaquel<br />
51 shades of xander<br />
a second serving of tortellini<br />
bug jupiter<br />
speed 2: cruise control<br />
disney's star wars??<br />
PASSES<br />
$3 to Paul, every shade of Xander will chair<br />
<br />
motion to create the Committee For Haikus: for self reference<br />
even this acronym<br />
Bubbles is killing some time for people to think of haikus<br />
motion to nominate bubbles as hero of the poeple<br />
refrigerator, refrigerator haiku, refrigerator<br />
if you think I'm writing the filibuster text you're probably drunk<br />
like, really drunk<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to afrieder, everybody will chair<br />
<br />
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for supplies for the event<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
Good Game Committee: to congratulate well mannered opponents for games that were played well<br />
change name to "the Drewisms Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
ad hoc Committee for Freshmen to Confuse the Rest of Us: success<br />
change all syllables to korean equivalent<br />
FAILS fuck you<br />
append qq more to purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
append diaf<br />
FAILS<br />
append asl<br />
FAILS<br />
append a flipped table to purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
modify flipped table to mini fipped table<br />
PASSES<br />
PASSES<br />
$4 to Drew, Drew will chair<br />
<br />
That's What She Said Committee: if you finish someone's sentence, that's what they meant to say<br />
nope<br />
<br />
KGB Is Now In Preschool Committee: thanking Xander for putting us all to sleep<br />
caroline gives Xander a 1 out of 10<br />
PLOT TWIST Bubbles reads a thing<br />
no<br />
lorum ipsum dolor set<br />
and that's what I have memorized you can google the rest<br />
notice that this is very empty and boring<br />
that is because someone is reading something<br />
and I do not care<br />
append "i am a full time internet" to purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
I think JRAM is quoting a thing WITH YELLING<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to Drew<br />
<br />
That Picture of Mike Sleeping Was Way More Important Than The Minutes Committee: apparently the point of this is web apps<br />
there's a chrome extention that will change all pictures on a website to ryan gosling<br />
there's a chrome extention that will change all instances of "the cloud" on a page to "my butt"<br />
PASSES<br />
$2 to drew, disbanded<br />
Extra:<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
Running Jumping Climbing Trees<br />
Friday, 6:30, Flagstaff<br />
you'll do all of those at the same time (you shouldn't do all of those at the same time)<br />
<br />
exec is now in Wean 5312<br />
Tuesdays at 6:30<br />
<br />
dues! pay them!<br />
<br />
BOOTH<br />
we'll vote on Booth in the next month<br />
we need to know who booth chairs can be before that<br />
have to have paid your student activities fee and be a member in order to work/vote on Booth<br />
you should talk to exec (or email them) and/or come to the exec meeting<br />
grads can't be on midway<br />
eforney can tell you more about that<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
Xander<br />
Xander why<br />
<br />
TOC is in the next couple days<br />
it sucks<br />
go, it's important<br />
<br />
NSA is recruiting you, if you're interested you'll get an email soon<br />
<br />
purple and gtfo<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130923&diff=7899Minutes201309232016-04-26T04:55:15Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
Running Jumping Climbing Trees, S'Mores, Mafia<br />
there were adventures with fire<br />
we almost burned some pizza boxes<br />
well, we actually did burn some pizza boxes, don't worry about it<br />
then a lot of work and not enough work happened at the same time<br />
apparently there's a goldman sachs info session at 6:00<br />
so they might be hovering outside ALL HOUR (there might be random people outside)<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a weekend<br />
involved "helping" her sisters talk to other people and getting progressively more fancy<br />
Committee to Crossbreed Orgs reports success<br />
new people!<br />
Shashank, ECE (maybe CS?), from india (and new york), goes to CMU<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
Went to KGB Argues About the Semantics of Vanilla And Then Eats Chocolate<br />
did the puzzlehunt on Saturday<br />
came in third!<br />
10 hours of grading on Sunday, is about halfway done<br />
EVENT<br />
KGB Digs Its Own Grave<br />
Friday, 7:00, MM A14<br />
Karaoke!<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
Had a weekend<br />
did lots of [redacted] with [redacted] and it was most excellently [redacted]<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend<br />
started with Running Jumping Climbing Trees, then s'mores, then Doctor Who<br />
then a day of hair dying and cookies and more Doctor Who<br />
and then WORK FOREVER<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend<br />
Went to Running Jumping Climbing Trees<br />
argued about lots of things<br />
Did the Puzzlehunt!<br />
overall really fun<br />
then just did work ALL OF SUNDAY<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
had a weekend<br />
same as other execs on Friday<br />
dyed margaret's hair on Saturday<br />
didn't get enough work done on Sunday<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
COMMITEE REPORTS<br />
Guild of Calamitous Intent: declared war on the Evil Seafood League (and vice versa)<br />
point of information: does xander chair both?<br />
yes<br />
<br />
ad hoc Interp Essay Commitee: what I learned in boating school is<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee: went to Stacked, can now officially endorse the Bahama Mama<br />
<br />
ad hoc 1984 Committee: But the Guild of Calamitious Intent has always been at war.<br />
<br />
Committee to Teach You All Sign Language: happy fall everyone!<br />
<br />
the full host of committees about dkirby: this time next week, he will either have a job or be looking for a job<br />
<br />
ad hoc Illustrious Journalist Collective: A unicorn has been spotted in Frick Park.<br />
Local wildlife enthusiast and rare and used book collector Jeromy Heinz has reported sighting the magnificent beast when he was "Out in the park despos..discovering evi...den...ce of a unicorn!"<br />
He went on to say that any recently dug earth and ritual markings are due to the unicorn should not be touched or moved ever.<br />
Because unicorns are possessive. Of dirt. And ritual markings.<br />
<br />
ad hoc Real Analysis is Hell Committee: there are 32 questions on the homework<br />
they only had 6 last year<br />
<br />
ad hoc Too Long Stories: the new How I Met Your Mother premieres tonight<br />
<br />
ad hoc Shit I Saw In The Tartan Committee: some legitimately scary shit<br />
<br />
ad hoc There's An Outside? Committee: it's fall?<br />
<br />
Untap of Places that Don't Exist Committee: some of the doors on Doherty Hall B level are harder to open<br />
they're sticky<br />
<br />
ad hoc Reaver Prevention Committee: has some concern about the Tartan centerfold<br />
<br />
50 Shades of Xander Committee: we had a fly problem at the Moon, xander was in charge of dealing with it<br />
they may have a spider "opportunity" now<br />
<br />
KGB Goes Outside Committee: giant duck on Friday!<br />
<br />
ad hoc Speak Of The Devil And He Shall Come Committee: success<br />
<br />
ad hoc Illustrious Journalist Collective: Police have put out a missing persons report for Halbjorn Versk, owner of Unearthed Tomes, a used and rare book shop.<br />
A report was filed after the ship had been unexpectedly closed for three days,<br />
after which messages started appearing in blood written on the windows of the store saying "He took me into the woods. I am there still. It is too late for me but not for the rest of you. Find me. You do not have much time".<br />
In other news, people have been flocking to Frick Park to see the unicorn.<br />
Those that have returned were "underwhelmed" by the unicorn, and those have not have not been heard from.<br />
<br />
Hold Hands With The Devil And He Shall Come Committee: too soon<br />
<br />
misappropriated KGB Goes Outside Committee: dkirby went on a picnic, it was muddy<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The Thing!<br />
The demise of Happyville is not Stuart's fault.<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
SCP Committee: a) document and contain things found by the Illustrious Journalist Collective, b) kill said journalists so the truth does not come out<br />
append copy docs from computer<br />
FAILS<br />
Oren made a self-referencial joke<br />
The Guild of Calamitous Intent and the Evil Seafood League both approve, then both disapprove to disagree with each other, and then flip flop a bit<br />
and then there was a war<br />
they're at a standstill now, but 6 people are dead<br />
Everyone's a Linguist Committee: success<br />
to quote Fox Mulder: Getting spooky?<br />
to quote any other fox: CHA CH CHA CH CHA CHA CHA <br />
to quote Fox News: water is bad<br />
to quote Foxtrot: physics joke<br />
PASSED<br />
$3 to Marlena, she and anyone else who wants to be part of the governmental collective will chair<br />
<br />
Illustrious Journalist Collective: put eyes and ears where eyes and ears have never been and never will be again<br />
they make no mention of balls<br />
ad hoc Stealing eforney's Joke Committee: the trombone is connected to the, mouth bone<br />
Marlena has an extra toe (of course, it's not with her)<br />
ad hoc Musical Horror Movie Mashup Committee: the hills have eyes to the sounds of music<br />
the voices! they're now listening to you<br />
don't look at eforney in that tone of voice<br />
broman thought "tone of voice" was one word for YEARS when he was little<br />
are these strictly human eyes and ears?<br />
the Collective is an equal opportunity employer<br />
ad hoc Shit I Read in the Tartan Committee: Spank: 50 Shades of Parody<br />
change all instances of "eyes" to "eyes of corn"<br />
dilatory<br />
change "illustrious" to "illustrated"<br />
FAILS<br />
add "noses" to "eyes and ears" in purpose<br />
FAILS<br />
Overly Friendly Committee: massive failure<br />
have you ever really looked at unfathomable horrors? like, really looked?<br />
$5 to Xander, he will chair<br />
<br />
KGB Corrects Exec Committee:<br />
NOPE<br />
<br />
Barbarian Committee: to be immune to anything that committee [points to Xander] reports<br />
is this committee happy?<br />
it's still alive, so it doesn't really know<br />
motion to entomb Xander in his very own committee when he dies<br />
motion for committee to take a level in rogue<br />
WHAT IS THIS COMMITTEE YOU SPEAK OF? WHO IS THIS PRESIDENT OF WHOM YOU SPEAK?<br />
motion to more clearly define that<br />
restated purpose with illust committee<br />
purpose changed to "immune to anything this committee reports"<br />
PASSES<br />
append "exept for vampires" to the purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
redact "this committee" from purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
so whenever "this committee" comes up on your monitor, take a black highlighter and cross it out<br />
a sharpie will also do just fine<br />
$5 to afrieder, anyone who doesn't want to listen to [REDACTED] will also chair<br />
The new purpose is: "to be immune to anything [REDACTED] reports except for vampires"<br />
<br />
Innovative Technologies Committee: to bring new and interesting technology to reasonable communist consumers like you<br />
will this support synergy and the use of the cloud?<br />
only if the cloud's on fire<br />
replace "the cloud" in minutes with "my butt"<br />
out of order<br />
Fistbump R&D Committee: approves<br />
Barbarian Committee: huh?<br />
this week, the committee intends to introduce jet fueled glasses: so we can all be Superman<br />
will this committee be able to produce black highlighters?<br />
you cannot get them on Amazon<br />
replace all reason with glory (in general)<br />
out of order<br />
our superficial design flaws outweigh the fundamental ones<br />
how many of the products rely on tech that gains energy from severed dog heads?<br />
[REDACTED]<br />
white highlighters?<br />
info available in redacted folder<br />
motion for the committee to give free samples to all the people who vote in favor<br />
yes<br />
our product puts the "car" in carcinogen<br />
SCP Committee: if it starts blowing or talking, give us a call<br />
$8 to Mike, Dillon will chair<br />
<br />
Committee for Free Samples: make sure that the above committee will fulfill the specifications<br />
will serve Uranium brewed coffee in the next room in a few hours<br />
free skittles? for everyone<br />
That's What You Meant To Say Committee: success<br />
that committee doesn't exist<br />
Time Mafia: supports to get samples a free trial from our justice system<br />
ad hoc New Committe: oh wait no<br />
you are free to have these samples... for a small price<br />
change name to "Open Source Samples Committee"<br />
PASSES<br />
change name to "Open Source As A Bird Committee"<br />
FAILS<br />
supersonic limbo: pew pew pew pew pew<br />
$3 to afrieder, anyone who likes open source stuff will chair<br />
<br />
allocation to not exceed $50 for the event!<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
Committee to Table the Chair: to bed the sofa and other furniture jokes<br />
does anyone want a wardrobe?<br />
does anyone want a witch?<br />
does anyone want to give dan a couch?<br />
caroline would like a lion<br />
to go with her wardrobe and witch<br />
change the name to "craigslist/furniture committee"<br />
FAILS<br />
how do you feel about futons?<br />
fubulous<br />
the Perks of Being a Twerkflower Committee: success<br />
(that's not a committeee)<br />
$2 to Drew, people who have excess furniture will chair<br />
<br />
Committee Against Humanity: add commentary to anything in the form of Cards Against Humanity cards<br />
Glen Beck being harried by buzzards<br />
the school trip was ruined once again by crystal meth<br />
Marlena would say that this is the beginning of a slipery slope, but by making this committee we've already hit rock bottom<br />
old people smell<br />
I drink to forget drinking alone<br />
Alcoholist Committee: you should join us!<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Kittens!<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Harry Potter Erotica<br />
Innovative Technologies Committee: working on a card that fills in the fist thing that comes to your head<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Bitches<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Police Brutality<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secretions<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Oh God Oh God A Mind Reading Card Oh No<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Dead Horses<br />
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Bronies<br />
$6 to eforney, she will chair and so will anyone else<br />
<br />
Alexander Orenstein Memorial Committee: it's never too early to get a start on this<br />
change purpose to "soon"<br />
PASSES<br />
is Xander a) working on dangerous stuff and b) planning to release it soon?<br />
isn't that vacuously true?<br />
change "Alexander" to "Xander"<br />
FAILS<br />
replace "Xander Orenstein" with "Xorer Anderstein"<br />
FAILS<br />
replace "Alexander" with "Ail Xander"<br />
FAILS<br />
motion to quantify committee over all Alexanders<br />
nope<br />
change all "Alexander" to "Xander"<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to change name to xander s orenstein<br />
PASSES<br />
misappropriated Precedent Committee: success<br />
$4 to Drew, everyone except Xander will chair<br />
<br />
Sitcommittee: provide laughtracks for the KGB<br />
change the name to "Romcommittee"<br />
dilatory<br />
point of info: it's no longer the 1980s, guys<br />
motion to make this meeting a very special episode<br />
PASSES<br />
Motion to make this meeting the Christmas special<br />
FAILS<br />
applause<br />
we all learned a valuable lesson today about friendship, caring, and not selling meth to school children<br />
motion to have a heartwarming moment<br />
PASSES<br />
motion to finally introduce the mother<br />
...eh<br />
$4 to Stuart, he will chair<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
KGB Digs Its Own Grave<br />
karaoke!<br />
MM A14, 7:00, Friday<br />
<br />
pay dues!<br />
pay Dillon, then talk to Zora<br />
<br />
BOOTH!<br />
we'll vote next week<br />
theme announcement for all of carnival next week<br />
before monday's meeting you can submit ideas for our own theme<br />
we'll get something up on Friday<br />
real serious business!<br />
you have to have paid your dues to vote<br />
you can discuss without voting though<br />
it's a rollcall vote<br />
<br />
if you haven't paid for committees, PAY<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
ITR<br />
10:00 Saturday night at the Wean 4 couches<br />
<br />
2 members have started buggy not at Ethan's org<br />
go to Apex meetings!<br />
<br />
12-2 free food in Wiegand<br />
chili cookoff<br />
<br />
does anyone want a wardrobe?<br />
<br />
do you enjoy Star Trek?<br />
did the recent movies not feel late 80s early 90s enough?<br />
borg night on Saturday<br />
<br />
The Illustrious Journalist Collective has an electronic version coming to a Facebook group near you<br />
<br />
follow Christian after the meeting for a lot of spaghetti<br />
<br />
puzzlehunt signup<br />
teams of up to four<br />
mazeoftwistypassages.com<br />
<br />
purple and gtfo<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Soniahttps://wiki.cmukgb.org/index.php?title=Minutes20130930&diff=7898Minutes201309302016-04-26T04:54:53Z<p>Sonia: </p>
<hr />
<div>OFFICER REPORTS<br />
Broman<br />
had a weekend<br />
started with the event which he already forgot<br />
it was karaoke<br />
it was nice<br />
guesses he did homework on Saturday<br />
walked into ITR, saw that it was Massachusetts, and just walked away<br />
more work than usual on Sunday because the Packers weren't playing<br />
less work than enough<br />
which is a pattern<br />
but at least he doens't have a 251 exam next week because he's a TA for that class<br />
<br />
Caroline<br />
had a week<br />
mostly built a website<br />
and by that she means that eforney built a website<br />
on Friday there was a duck!<br />
did work over the weekend<br />
new people!<br />
"This is our hazing thing, come on, it's really quick"<br />
(name, major, origin, uninteresting fact)<br />
vivek, MechE or ECE, San Jose, has black hair<br />
Zeph, MechE/arts, Tennessee, that<br />
Caroline, public policy, Colorado, has freckles<br />
<br />
JRAM<br />
had a weekend<br />
started with the event<br />
proved he could beat Colmar up with infinity knives<br />
did various things<br />
a lot of grading<br />
EVENT<br />
Movie Night!<br />
Friday, DH A302, 7:00<br />
it will be an interesting experiment in government<br />
<br />
Marlena<br />
had a weekend<br />
started with event, where she sang<br />
spent weekend building a game where elvis fends off mole people with his guitar<br />
<br />
Zora<br />
had a weekend<br />
volunteered computer for Karaoke and then was TRAPPED<br />
then ITR on Saturday<br />
didn't sleep much<br />
aaand then work all of Sunday<br />
and a failed attempt to find pants<br />
at a STORE jesus christ people<br />
<br />
Dillon<br />
had a weekend<br />
went to the event<br />
only sang twice<br />
ITR was fun<br />
never heard of Massachusetts before, that was interesting<br />
worked all of Sunday<br />
<br />
Mike<br />
karaoke night<br />
danced, it was fun (sort of)<br />
sort of danced, not it was sort of fun, it was definitely fun<br />
homework due at five on Saturday so she woke up early<br />
not as much work happened as it could have but whatever<br />
<br />
COMMITTEE REPORT<br />
<br />
KGB Rocks the 80s Committee: reports<br />
<br />
Horse_ebooks Committee: everything was a lie<br />
<br />
ad hoc KGB Plans Ahead Committee: theme of today's meeting is "Dillon!"<br />
<br />
Innovative Technologies Committee: we've been working on black highlighters<br />
they create black holes where ever they're used<br />
but they're on sale now!<br />
<br />
ad hoc Less Than Half Of Us Will Get This Joke Committee: KELMAR<br />
<br />
Call of Cthulu Committee: approves the Massachusetts rule set<br />
<br />
SCP Committee: don't pay attention to the missing journalists in Massachusetts<br />
<br />
Spoken Song Lyrics Committee: I don't give a duck, duck everything<br />
<br />
possibly misappropriated Spoken Song Lyrics Committee: twrights mom has got it going on<br />
<br />
Alcoholist Committee in conjunction with the Pokémon Committee: there's a thing of pokemon related drinks going around the internet<br />
their favorite drink is the Flareon<br />
they haven't tried it yet but they're gonna make it tonight<br />
<br />
OLD BUSINESS<br />
The Thing!<br />
failing all his interviews not Drew's fault<br />
<br />
NEW BUSINESS<br />
motion to make an allocation for $65 to pay booth fee this year<br />
this year's theme is "the Best of the Best"<br />
9 days until meeting in which individual org's themes are selected<br />
tomorrow (if we vote to do booth) exec will pick chairs<br />
at next Monday's meeting we'd pick themes<br />
Dillon:<br />
sophomore, last year was first booth<br />
"Booth is a lot of fun, but also a lot of work, but ultimately worth it."<br />
It's a lot of work, there are a lot of builds, but it's FUN<br />
Build week is really cool<br />
we won 2nd place this year!<br />
dsisson:<br />
maybe we have more money to buy better wood!<br />
addendum: MAYBE we have more money. maybe.<br />
Marlena:<br />
done booth for two years, wants to do booth!<br />
Mike:<br />
we've said good things! But don't forget that it's a LOT of work<br />
we need to know that there will be people working on it<br />
we can't do it if just the booth chairs show up to builds(it would be a crappy booth)<br />
Dillon:<br />
in general, 3 categories for voters<br />
don't want to do a booth: vote no<br />
want to do a booth, don't know if can help: vote abstain<br />
want to do booth, will be able to help: vote yes<br />
yes means at a minimum, you'll show up at build week and pretty much definitely move on and probably some builds<br />
how many people have expressed interest in booth chairing?<br />
3<br />
Dillon:<br />
Booth costs a minimum of a couple thousand dollars<br />
we are sufficiently equipped to do booth<br />
it won't negatively impact our other activities<br />
this isn't a one-or-the other kind of decision<br />
we don't know when the planning meetings would be, but we'll find out<br />
usually once a week in the evening during first semester<br />
Broman:<br />
did booth all three years<br />
really great experiences (but different)<br />
freshman<br />
put a lot of effort in<br />
went to basically every build<br />
got to build week and died<br />
not literally<br />
booth chairs put a ton of time and effort in<br />
didn't think he could chair because he didn't think he could make it through build week<br />
sophomore<br />
not a chair<br />
still put a lot of work in<br />
still relieved to be able to go home during build week<br />
decided to be a chair the next week<br />
junior<br />
was a chair (with scorri and ryan)<br />
made some changes (3 builds a week instead of 2)<br />
bigger drain on chairs, asked more from members<br />
got a lot out of it!<br />
not going to be a chair this year<br />
our chairs aren't gonna be any of the ones from last year<br />
3 new chairs this year, but Ryan and Broman will be around<br />
has confidence in the chairs<br />
Marlena:<br />
IT'S GONNA BE GREAT WE'RE GONNA DO BOOTH MAYBE<br />
blitz booth?<br />
Broman: "it's a smaller, shittier booth"<br />
half the size of a full booth, one story<br />
most of the time you only get one, MAYBE two small rooms<br />
very restrictive<br />
we'll try to take into account the resources we have in terms of people when planning<br />
how much is prebuilt?<br />
so how it works:<br />
you build flats beforehand (structures made out of 2x4s)<br />
ours are usually a max of 6ft wide<br />
after move on the flats go up, and then the ply goes up (that's usually painted beforehand)<br />
move on is when we bring stuff onto midway<br />
it's the Friday before carnival<br />
build week is that Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Wednesday<br />
and then it bleeds through Wednesday night into Thursday morning<br />
Carnival opens Thursday afternoon and goes through Saturday<br />
and then Sunday is teardown<br />
Dillon:<br />
as orgs go, we have a great spot for where we prebuild<br />
called the Kage, under Stever, so it's right next to midway<br />
furniture?<br />
sometimes we build stuff<br />
this is the last year on midway, so it's kind of specially significant<br />
also maybe the last year for two story booths?<br />
(midway is the morewood gardens parking lot)<br />
how many people would we need at each build?<br />
that's dependant on many factors<br />
anecdotal evidence:<br />
3 builds a week<br />
5-9 people came on the weekdays, 10ish people came on the weekends<br />
worked great last year<br />
PASSES<br />
16 yes, 1 no, 13 abstain<br />
Notes<br />
please submit themes!<br />
Marlena will post a link to the subreddit<br />
people who don't have an account need one, but it's real easy and doesn't require an email address<br />
also go read and vote on the others<br />
next week we'll discuss and take an advisory vote<br />
make sure your friends know about booth!<br />
even if you didn't vote yes you can still work on booth!<br />
<br />
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for supplies for the event<br />
PASSES<br />
<br />
KGB is a Pokémans Committtee: to take the members of the KGB and put them in the pokédex<br />
Krigor Krigon Krigora Committee: success<br />
Dillon! evolves into Drewdles<br />
dillon dil dillon dil drewdles drewdles drewdles<br />
does this mean that we can have a pokerap but for the KGB?<br />
Caroline will pay someone a small amount of money for a real eforney with the four knees<br />
PASSES<br />
$5 to Caroline, Dillon! will chair<br />
SLOWPOKE<br />
<br />
Breaking Bad Committee: NOPE<br />
<br />
Dillontory Committee: he's our mascot and he's always so friendly, what if we changed that?<br />
Dillon is really this meeting's theme<br />
motion to dillonate the roles of this committee<br />
dillontory<br />
insert pickle between all "Dill" and "on"<br />
FAILS<br />
append Dillon to bylaws<br />
out of order<br />
they illin' we Dillon<br />
append bylaws to Dillon<br />
no!<br />
Dayton, Ohio Committee: Dillon state park is a park in Ohio<br />
$12 to Dillon, Dillon and Drew will chair<br />
<br />
Mini Bible Committee: wherever you look, there's a bible watching you with it's ears<br />
append minijesus to purpose<br />
PASSES<br />
misappropriated Illustrious Journalist Collective: the best time for Christian group to be tabling is during a prospective student tour<br />
next to an AHA table<br />
on Blasphemy day<br />
replace all instances of "jesus" with "cooper"<br />
PASSES<br />
note: it says in large print "this is not to be sold" inside the minibibles<br />
ABSTAINED WHICH MEANS IT FAILED<br />
<br />
ANNOUNCEMENTS<br />
EVENT<br />
Movie Night<br />
Friday, DH A302<br />
will involve voting<br />
we'll devise some planning thing ahead of time and put it online<br />
<br />
Puzzlehunt<br />
sign up at mazeoftwistypassages.com<br />
October 12, the Saturday after next<br />
playtesters needed!<br />
<br />
submit ideas for Booth!<br />
<br />
SCHMUCKS<br />
it's still Blasphemy day<br />
DAMN STRAIGHT<br />
<br />
purple and gtfo<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category: Minutes]]</div>Sonia