User:Alan - Revision history

Eforney at 06:20, 19 June 2011

2011-06-19T06:20:24Z

Eforney at 07:15, 1 March 2011

2011-03-01T07:15:44Z

So0s at 16:27, 7 May 2007

2007-05-07T16:27:00Z

Ed at 23:54, 13 November 2006

2006-11-13T23:54:16Z

Alan at 21:11, 13 November 2006

2006-11-13T21:11:35Z

Alan at 21:09, 13 November 2006

2006-11-13T21:09:39Z

New page

'''Alan Cameron Caum''' (3 September 1983 - ) is a KGB member known for his thickly packed prose style, his fast, badly articulated, and reference-packed manner of speech, his near-pathological fondness for designing [[flyers]], and his habit of bursting randomly into song in languages he does not actually speak.

In the popular imagination, Alan possesses a strangely self-contradictory, dualistic status: on the one hand, he is often assumed to be a [[CMU]] student, while on the other, he is often assumed to be around the same age as [[Shawn Knight]]. In fact, he is not a CMU student, and his status vis-a-vis CMU is a unique and ill-defined beast, and he is ten years younger than Shawn.

Alan is, to the best of his knowledge, the only non-student ever to serve as clerk of CMU's Student Senate, and would have stood for election to KGB's [[Exec]] last year had he been eligible, though even he admits that he doesn't really know what he would have run for.

His knowledge of arcane and obscure subjects in history, art, language, and literary theory is extraordinarily broad, but in most places not especially deep. Higher mathematics, logic, and theories of category, set, and information are utterly beyond his capacity to grasp, but he firmly believes (in the absence of any evidence) that, given the opportunity, he could write circles around nearly everyone he knows, and as he has always placed a fetishistically high value on linguistic intelligence, this is quite enough for him.

Alan may be seen weekly at KGB meetings, generally rising during [[committee reports]] to spiel out some unlikely adventure of the Time Travel Committee; at Exec meetings on Wednesdays offering input on upcoming events and projects, or in syndication (check your local listings).

He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol, just in the process of writing it.

← Older revision		Revision as of 06:20, 19 June 2011
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	[[Category:Members]]		[[Category:Members]]
		+	[[Category:Defectors]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:15, 1 March 2011
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	He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed\|Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol.		He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed\|Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol.
		+
		+	[[Category:Members]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:27, 7 May 2007
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−	'''Alan Cameron Caum''' (3 September 1983 - ) is a KGB member known for his thickly packed prose style, his fast, badly articulated, and reference-packed manner of speech, his near-pathological fondness for designing [[flyers]], and his habit of bursting randomly into song in languages he does not actually speak.	+	'''Alan Cameron Caum''' (3 September 1983 - ) is a [[KGB]] member known for his thickly packed prose style, his fast, badly articulated, and reference-packed manner of speech, his near-pathological fondness for designing [[flyers]], and his habit of bursting randomly into song in languages he does not actually speak.

	In the popular imagination, Alan possesses a strangely self-contradictory, dualistic status: on the one hand, he is often assumed to be a [[CMU]] student, while on the other, he is often assumed to be around the same age as [[Shawn Knight]]. In fact, he is not a CMU student, and his status vis-a-vis CMU is a unique and ill-defined beast, and he is ten years younger than Shawn.		In the popular imagination, Alan possesses a strangely self-contradictory, dualistic status: on the one hand, he is often assumed to be a [[CMU]] student, while on the other, he is often assumed to be around the same age as [[Shawn Knight]]. In fact, he is not a CMU student, and his status vis-a-vis CMU is a unique and ill-defined beast, and he is ten years younger than Shawn.

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:54, 13 November 2006
Line 9:		Line 9:
	Alan may be seen weekly at KGB meetings, generally rising during [[committee reports]] to spiel out some unlikely adventure of the Time Travel Committee; at Exec meetings on Wednesdays offering input on upcoming events and projects; or in syndication (check your local listings).		Alan may be seen weekly at KGB meetings, generally rising during [[committee reports]] to spiel out some unlikely adventure of the Time Travel Committee; at Exec meetings on Wednesdays offering input on upcoming events and projects; or in syndication (check your local listings).

−	He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol.	+	He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed\|Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol.

@@ Line 3: / Line 3: @@
 In the popular imagination, Alan possesses a strangely self-contradictory, dualistic status: on the one hand, he is often assumed to be a [[CMU]] student, while on the other, he is often assumed to be around the same age as [[Shawn Knight]]. In fact, he is not a CMU student, and his status vis-a-vis CMU is a unique and ill-defined beast, and he is ten years younger than Shawn.
-Alan is, to the best of his knowledge, the only non-student ever to serve as clerk of CMU's Student Senate, and would have stood for election to KGB's [[Exec]] last year had he been eligible, though even he admits that he doesn't really know what he would have run for.
+Alan is, to the best of his knowledge, the only non-student ever to serve as clerk of CMU's Student Senate. He would have stood for election to KGB's [[Exec]] last year had he been eligible, though even he admits that he doesn't really know what he would have run for.
-His knowledge of arcane and obscure subjects in history, art, language, and literary theory is extraordinarily broad, but in most places not especially deep. Higher mathematics, logic, and theories of category, set, and information are utterly beyond his capacity to grasp, but he firmly believes (in the absence of any evidence) that, given the opportunity, he could write circles around nearly everyone he knows, and as he has always placed a fetishistically high value on linguistic intelligence, this is quite enough for him.
+His knowledge of arcane and obscure subjects in history, art, language, and literary theory is extraordinarily broad, but in most places not especially deep. Higher mathematics, logic, and theories of category, set, and information are utterly beyond his capacity to grasp He firmly believes, however (in the absence of any evidence) that, given the opportunity, he could write circles around nearly everyone he knows; and, as he has always placed a fetishistically high value on linguistic intelligence, this is quite enough for him.
-Alan may be seen weekly at KGB meetings, generally rising during [[committee reports]] to spiel out some unlikely adventure of the Time Travel Committee; at Exec meetings on Wednesdays offering input on upcoming events and projects, or in syndication (check your local listings).
+Alan may be seen weekly at KGB meetings, generally rising during [[committee reports]] to spiel out some unlikely adventure of the Time Travel Committee; at Exec meetings on Wednesdays offering input on upcoming events and projects; or in syndication (check your local listings).
-He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol, just in the process of writing it.
+He is considered in some circles to be a kind of spiritual successor to Shawn Knight, which means he is some sort of weird spiritual half-sibling or demi-cousin to [[Ed Ryan]]. Considering this for too long can result in blindness, sterility, or death, and has already driven the author of this page to despairing thoughts of Pine-Sol.