Minutes20131014
From KGB Wiki
OFFICER REPORTS
Broman
Had a weekend
event for three minutes before puzzlehunt planning
but not entirely because there were mistakes, and then more mistakes
then puzzlehunt
there were mistakes, which they fixed, then more mistakes, which they fixed, etc.
it went okay
did work eventually on sunday
decided not to sleep
watched highlights of football on the internet instead
good decisions
Caroline
had a week
started with a hat that mysteriously did nothing to her
still only in the double digits of job applications sent out this week
has a group project and everyone is chill and awesome
doesn't know what karmic reprecussions will happen
JRAM
had a weekend
started with a sliver of the event
then lots of puzzlehunt being broken
and then being fine
his friends have off school so he's been playing dota instead of doing work
EVENT
video game night
Friday at 7:00 in the Wean 5300 corridor
we'll post a thing for people to sign up to bring things
Marlena
had a weekend
involved being possessed by a deceased Soviet officer
after that work maybe got done
PRAVDA!
Zora
had a weekend
did a lot of shouting in a terrible russian accent
then Doctor Who
then puzzlehunt
and like three hours of goodbad tv to decompress
it was great
then presumably work
Dillon
had a weekend
planning puzzlehunt
planning runaround for puzzlehunt during puzzlehunt
went rather well
then did lots and lots of work on Sunday
Mike
had a weekend
friend visited, who she had to pick up from the bus station
the soviet possession didn't really know how to drive a car, so that was interesting
didn't notice the puzzlehunt problems
tried to do work on Sunday but comics instead
COMMITTEE REPORTS
ccolombo Is An Anti-Aircraft Tank Committee:
It's not a challenge. It's not.
ad hoc Lie On The Floor, Try Not To Cry, Cry A Lot Committee:
the puzzlehunt was a field of broken dreams
Innovative Technologies Committee:
this is actually a tech talk, they lied about it being a KGB meeting
sign your name on a blank piece of paper for the Adventure Initiative!
Illustrious Journalist Collective:
various ghosts, spirits, whites, and revenants have appeared for an annual haunting of Tad McDaniels
(who allegedly murdered someone once)
ad hoc And I Would Have Gotten Away With It, Too, If It Weren't For You Pesky Kids Committee:
Reports
SCP Committee:
any ghosty things can be returned to SCP for a reward
Daniel John Kirby Scared Stupid Committee:
He got Dead Space.
BOOTH!:
planning meetings in Porter A18A on Sundays at 3 for the rest of the semester
Innovative Technologies Committee:
will not accept brides as bribes
there's a typo on their flyer
Guild of Calamitous Intent:
calling evil seafood a bunch of little bitches
Evil Seafood League:
what I'm sorry we can't hear you over the sound of your families screaming
ad hoc What Is This Committee:
I don't even
eforney Is Pretty Committee:
pintrest!
50 Shades of Xander Committee:
the electric bill came back with refund for 12 dollars
nobody complained, whatever Xander's doing seems to be working
OLD BUSINESS
The Thing!
too many freshmen going home is not Skye's fault
NEW BUSINESS
Captain Vulcanov Committee: zis is not games, zis is training exercises
ad hoc Twister Chess Committee: many butts
ad hoc Words Committee: success
PASSES
$10 to Marlena, she and anyone else who will wear the hat will chair
Daniel John Kirby Scared Stupid Committee: to report on any scary games that he will play
isn't this committee made redundant by the existance of Dan?
change name and purpose to "Daniel John Kirby Scared By Stupid Committee: to report on terrible horror movies"
FAILS
change purpose to "shit Dan does":
already exists
committ discussion to Daniel John Kirby is So Full of Himself to make it a subcommittee
PASSES
KGButts Committee: to put all of KGB butts above KGB heads
so, twister chess
change name to "Semore Butts"
no
isn't this committee a little cheeky?
ad hoc KGB Gymnastics Committee: success
motion to append cloud
misappropriated Spoken Song Lyrics Committee:
lookit dat butt
lookit dat butt
lookit dat butt
Touchin' Butts Committee: doesn't say anythign
change name to "KGands"
fails
PASSES
$7 to Stuart, anyone with a butt will chair
Outdated Memes Commitee: hail englip
JACK'S VAN JACK'S VAN
why aren't you buying more tangerines
this this this this this this this this this this this this this this
BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL
tortellini
epic fail
epic win
lol
invisible bicycle
dancing baby gif
supersonic limpo: pew pew pew
yuma yuma
omg shoes
the bubonic plague
stahp
Dillon would like to welcome the KGB to the internet
charlie bit my finger
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE
xander votes no on everything
FAILS
Twister Chess League: oversee all games of twister chess and ensure that they're all unsafe and unproductive
change name to "Strip Twister Chess Committee"
not yet friendly
KGButts Committee: approves of both
isn't this a committee a duplicate of the KGButts committe
ad hoc Recursion Committee: approves
motion to make this committee the set of all committees that don't contain themselves
Dillontory Committee: dillon!
$4 to Zeph, Dillon will chair
Ill Spirit and Bitter Committee: bid on committees so that people will have to pay more
misappropriated Alcoholist Committee: would like to know how this committee feels about bitters
this is what Drew does already
report from treasurer: yessssssss
PASSES
$14 to Drew, he will chair
Committee for The Real Meaning Of Columbus Day: to spread the spirit of Columbus Day by invading everyone's yards and spreading new diseases
Caroline thought that the true spirit was for CMU students to complain about how everyone else got the day off
no, you're all wrong, the real purpose is to take credit for things that other people have done first
no, you're all wrong, the real purpose is to kick people out of their homes
you're all just wrong
wait but isn't it just a holiday where we watch the show Colombo
Oh God Why Committee: you should not do these things around Xander
no, you're all wrong, the real purpose is to take credit for things that other people have done first
PASSES
$3 to McGinnis, disbanded
Flat Earth Committee: if the earth was round then we'll all just roll off it
actually with a sufficiently large sphere and the right axis you can get it to rock in stable motion forever
Ptolemy was right, motion to append geotension
nope
motion to declare universe as flat
out of order
don't worry earth, one day you'll hit puberty
misappropriated Don't Worry It's For Science Committee: we sent some one to investigate. Don't worry, it's for science
append turtles all the way down
Conspiracy Theory Committee: if the earth is flat then how did we fake the moon landing?
Max Bid Committee: approves
Guild of Calamitous Intent: if the earth is so flat, then how did we take over your government?
PASSES
$2 to Drew, disbanded
no
just no
$29 to drew, no one will chair because it DOESN'T EXIST
Dillon's Weight in Gold Committee: to procure enough gold to replace Dillon as treasurer
motion to replace the water in R7 with lard
glasses of water can be purchased at the moon for $10 a pop
will this golden Dillon still be a pokemon?
yes, a shiny
change KGB to the gold standard
no
JRAM: diet tip: if you eat multiple things from the same animal then only the first thing counts
Caroline: waffles are shaped like 0s so they have 0 calories
change name to "Committee To Make Dillon Fat"
PASSES
Don't Worry It's For Science Committee: JRAM and Caroline's statements are true
Innovative Technolovies Committee: They've made a macine that turns things into gold, but it also turns the user bald
(it's for sale)
Dillontory Committee: many counts of noooooo
point of order: we need $2.6 million to do this thing
PASSES
$10 to McGinnis, anyone who might have the treasurers will chair
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for the event
PASSES
Crazy Horse Committee: to do any experiment possible for the KGB
change name to "Crazy Train"
PASSES
KGB Mashup Committee: trains are really just iron horses
we're goin' off the reins on a crazy horse
spaghetti
PASSES
$11 to Zeph, Mike will chair
KGBrains: we're more than our KGButts
KGB Zombies: approve greatly
all we want to do is eat your brains, we're not unreasonable
I mean, no one's gonna eat your eyes
append to purpose particle physics
PASSES
misappropriated Skeptics Committee: there is nothing to support string theory
change name to KGBoner
FAILS
change name to KGBiceps
FAILS
change name to KGB rains
FAILS
PASSES
$25 to Drew, people who appreciate brains will chair
ANNOUNCEMENTS
EVENT
Video Game Night
Friday at 7:00 in the Wean 5300 corridor
sign up in the google doc to bring things!
Sweatshirts!
we're gonna post a facebook thing, fill it out
CtFwS is in 11 days!
Judges meeting at some point
if you want to judge send exec an email
required that you've played before
Boooooooth
planning meeting
Porter A18A, 3:00 on Sunday
pre-CtFwS
we're gonna take and hold the fence next week
also doing fun and interesting things! like handing out candy and ribbons
we need people to sign up!
googledoc on the internet
SCHMUCKS
round of applause for Drew for funding KGB
new episodes of Doctor Who uncovered
McGinnis has Enemy of the World
he'll stream it at some point
it's been recently uncovered that episodes of 3rd Rock--DAMMIT THOMAS GET OUT OF MY HEAD
The Illustrious Journalists Committee is gonna start planning and doing things this midsemester break
message Xander on facebook
The Innovative Technologies Committee is recruiting just outside the door
