Minutes20150907
From KGB Wiki
EXEC REPORTS
mike
had a weekend
drove to jersey
dropped sister off at college!
jelly o them dorms
frankensteined all over bryn mawr
skye
had a weekend
dan was here, then pamela's, then kayaking (oh no)
halt and catch fire?
nerf war!!
new people
arley, cogsci, pittsburgh, is short
shonak, math, allentown, likes justin bieber
scott, was a pitt student (graduated), linguistics!, murdered someone once
peter, russia??, math, from boston
dillon
had a weekend
did
nothing
EVENT
UNDERGROUND TOUR
friday - meet at UC black chairs at 7:30 (and then go all over!)
all trueness
ends at the fence with grilling and veggie options!
dress inconspicuously!
activities fair
wednesday, 4:30, come hang out
erin
had a weekned
did nothing on saturday
went to ikea on sunday
grilled!
now is here
SUBMIT TO PRAVDA
zora
had a weekend
only computer tears
joe
had a weekend
pennapps
duck puns, i think it's revenge for the coins
murphy
had a weekend
wes anderson is great
shouldn't have locked his phone
WILL STRIKE DOWN UPON THEE don't attack mike y'all
this was very impressive i swear
COMMITTEE REPORTS
suburban white girls of america, pumkin in everything: soon
danjohn is so full of himself: hi misses us and loves us all v much
misap: also what
also misap: joe was going towards cluster along the pausch bridge
was NOT recognized by djk
murphy just turned into owen
misap danjon
he's a running joke, he doesn't actually exist
i had a dream
everything was normal except zora was floating
skye was like "have you MET them?"
and erin was like "okay."
sisson brought food???
misap danjohn with filibuster
no
danjohn secret southerner: approves of amount of guns
committee to assassinate the pres: HELLA reports
frieder is back
now he's not
roomba army: beep beep beep BEEP
the cabinet: is excited
we are now in purple
OLD BUSINESS
the Thing!
it mysteriously disappearing is not frieder's fault
NEW BUSINESS
actual soviet spies: [russian]
it's a BAD idea
WE HAVE RUSSIANS. SO MANY RUSSIANS
dylan is not russian
or maybe he is but his accent is super not
motion to table this committee until after the revolution
only if you set a time for the revolution
motion to table tis committee until after labor day
PASSES
TABLED
committee on soviet zombies:
there were funny jokes, recsec's comp is crappo
PASSES
$3 to frieder. who chairs? who knows!
committee to assinate the president: to moon the president
change purpose to "show the pres pictures of moons"
PASSES
that's no moon it's a bugmars
the ACTUAL moons of mars look like ASS
not like ass ass, they just look shitty
PASSES
$2 to steven, everyone with a really good ass and frieder
cow olympics: sometimes family feud is ridiculous
steve harvey met a dude who created the cow olympics
they had to... get a cow out of a pool?
family feud
the rules don't say a dog can't pay basketball
PASSES
$2 to ed, ed and erin and family feud watchers
the syndicate: to put all the rogues together in one extremely efficient assassination
it's a good idea
NO
how quickly would the membership decline?
it depends on skye
are we gonna have bowtie thursday
bowtie wednesdays and cinema thursdays
TABLED FOR 47 SECONDS
so, next week then
43 second naptime
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WAKE
leader of the opposition: fuck off
append "splat"
PASSES
oh look the minutes just say "fish" over and over and over again
salute steven!
change every word of the name and purpose with "frieder"
FAILS
question decision of chair
PASSES
i don't do those switches suck it
motion to restore the original purpose
PASSES
PASSES
$21 to owen, owen will chair!
committee on collective nouns: a group of emos is called an isopod, a group of frieders (when skye is done with them) is called a SPLAT
PASSES
$4 to shonak, owen will chair
committee to get a pickle into parlieament: to elect dill the tory, and also get a pickle into parliament
dylan approves
THE DUMMY GOT INTO PARLIAMENT
there's context here
LOTS OF REMEMBERING JOKES
they were funny
i was laughing, and thus, not typing
(if you want good minutes, go back to like. two years ago, idk)
PASSES
$1 to frieder, frieder and the pickle will chair
KBGate: scandalllls
change to kgbengazi
FAILED
appeal decision of the chair
PASSES
FAILS
motion to make an allocation nto to exceed $200 for food for the underground tour
PASSES
aviatic excursions: to give sky tours (skye toors)
fuck you (from skye)
PASSES
$4 to owen, skye will chair
pumpkin everything: the best time of the year
suburban white girls of america: there's actually no pumpkin in pumpkin spice anything
NOT ANYMORE
PUMPKIN SPICE MONSTER TRUCKS
chante purpose to that thing
PASSES
ok???
how does this committee feel about peppermint everything?
in dec, great
pumpkin SPICE more like pumpkin VICE guys i need help
the support group meets at starbucks
PASSES
$1 to erin, anyone who truly appreciates pumpkin spice anything will chair
committee to celebrate joes birthday: to make frieder a cake
owen hates thing
change purpose to "bake joe a frieder-shaped cake"
PASSES
motion to make frieder jump out of the frieder shaped cake
motion to give joe just. frieder in a cage for his birth day
motion to bake frieder into a cake
(frieder leaves quietly)
we're all accomplicessssss
(dilatory)
oh god we've gotten to nipple tassels it's time to go
PASSES
$7 to owen, the birthday boy will chair
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $5 to purchase nipple tassels, possibly doubling as nipple TASERS
frieder: will you actually use them?
there's only one way to find out
THIS IS NOW A COMMITTEE????
we have a gift fund
ed could donate the money and earmark it
did you know that AB films is showing magic mike in two weeks
PASSES
$5 to dylan, frieder and anyone willing to chip in for the tassels
motion to pass this motion
?
motion to return to old business
SURE
OLD BUSINESS
we are now in discussion of the syndicate
motion to table this committee at. some point
FAILS
change name to "dylantory" committee
FAILS
PASSES
$3 to owen, skye will chair
NEW BUSINESS
committee to find land owning dogs microphones: to find mike's woof lords
the bswolf memorial committee approves
motion to cover steven in bees and wolves
request only wolves
okay
PASSES
we can put the wolves in bee costumes
yep
PASSES
$1 to murphy, bswolf will chair
ANNOUNCEMENTS
EVENT
Underground tour!
friday, 7:30, black chairs
there will be food after
dress inconspicuously
email exec@cmukgb.org for storytelling and sign holding
kgb rifle association
hvz is happening this semester! message skye!
activities fair! it's fun come hang out on wednesday at 4:30
exec meetings!
7:30pm on wednesday in UC 329
SCHMUCKS
david brought food! come eat it!
we can get nipple tassels on amazon prime! oh god. no.
breakfast with people!
erin and ed and other people will be going to schatz on sunday mornings, come hang out
they'll be there around 10:30, when they opne
if you wanna get brunch with frieder, drag him out of bed and pay for his food
if anyone wants legal sized hanging folders, peter doesn't