Minutes20240902
OFFICER REPORTS
Daniel: fully moved all of things out of old place, mysteriously have sore spot on elbow
Kevin^Benner: not here right now, it’s labor day, weekend only ends when you go back to classes, ohio, I don’t know
Teddy: ambitiously carried 96 burgers and patties in one trip on a scooter, had to tie 3 grocery bags to my backpack
Event!!! Underground tour, this friday at 6:30 pm, meeting at UC black chairs
Nathan: played some board games, spent rest of time in practice room
Julia: frogs in Phipps, did not see any frogs
Isaac: by end of weekend will have attended 2 potlucks, record for potlucks, currently still have clothes in the laundry machine and the dryer
Kevin^Treasurer: as temporary treasurer, wrap up quick to not get coins thrown at me
COMMITTEE REPORTS
Nathan: weird monopoly editions: there are many editions of monopoly based on universities: florida state, ohio state, U of kansas, U of tennessee, U of washington, clemson
Kevin: UG tour spoilers: See that patch of desert over there? That’s where the Orientation Tent was. It turns out that putting floor tiles over the grass for four weeks kills it. Please note
Isaac: A.h. anecdotal notes about annoying people from my past: once knew a guy named deacon, he liked clemson, which coincidentally has a monopoly edition
OLD BUSINESS
Benner has thing (not here), Aresh gets the spirit of thing, not fault: very unripe chestnut that I tried to cook and eat, is fault: all other cases of food poisoning in the world
NEW BUSINESS
Kevin: motion to sit down the standing rule 8 (abstain has to be first) (unseconded)
Aresh: motion to reinstate the double or nothing standing rule, such that when bidding in an auction, a person may choose to bid double or nothing, they flip a coin, and give either 2xthe bid amount, or 0$ if they lose the flip, the chair flips the coin, coin is flipped at the time of sale (after winning the auction) Passed, been stood.
Isaac: point of information: Daniel still has the lingering curse
Daniel: I can’t make a committee report
Julia: motion to create a standing rule such that the chair can, by saying at the end of committee reports, “beep beep beep special report” and then enters a special reports stage of the meeting, wherein the chair can make committee reports
Kevin: latent, mis corn subs: fish
Kevin: motion to create a standing rule such that whenever a person hit by a paper airplane thrown by another person in meeting loses 1 hp
Passed, been stood
Kevin: mis committee to assassinate the president: failure, we’ll get him next time
Daniel: will you?
Kevin: motion to allocate “like 300$ for this week’s event”
Teddy: we spent like 150$, I think
Definition of a paper airplane?
Daniel: has to move through air and generate lift
Teddy: it’s a good idea
Passed, we have money for food, yay, come to ug tour to eat the food
Kevin: motion to create a standing rule that defines a paper airplane as a piece of paper that, when thrown, generates lift
Teddy: motion to append and does not rotate to that definition
Aresh: maybe it needs to remain oriented in roughly the same direction relative to the direction it’s travelling
Kevin: amend to “create a standing rule that defines a paper airplane as a piece of paper that, when thrown, generates lift, and it needs to remain oriented in roughly the same direction relative to the direction it’s travelling”
Julia: motion to append “or a nerf dart” to the definition (friendly, been changed)
Teddy: motion to create a standing rule such that daniel must say “Abstain” both before and after the votes for and against
Isaac: motion to amend such that we boo people who abstain during the second call for abstensions
final motion: motion to create a standing rule such that daniel must say “Abstain” both before and after the votes in favor and opposed, and we boo people who abstain during the second call for abstensions
NEW PERSON ALERT: ajay, he/him, hopefully ECE, spent too long looking for meeting
Kevin: motion to allocate 2 more dollars to kevin’s nuclear discretionary fund
(Tied vote, Passed)
Teddy: point of information, uranium is about 235,000 $ per gram
Ajay: 1/100,000th of an atom bomb can still do a lot of damage
Jonathan: point of information a gram of uranium has 20 billion calories
Jonathan: booth application submitted, we’re doing that, if you’re interested in helping KGB build a shack, talk to me
Jonathan: no information from SCC, theme will be announced at the end of september
Daniel: so we should do the booth yes or no vote
Nathan: point of information: 2$= 700,000 joules of uranium (167 calories)
Teddy: point of information, apparently plutonium is more common in nukes these days, 4,000$/gram
Ajay: are you on an FBI watchlist for these search results or what
Julia: motion to create a standing rule such that Kevin may “spend” 10$ from his nuclear discretionary fund to “nuke” a motion, immediately failing it
Kevin: it’s either this or I spend it on real uranium, it’s up to you (that’s a joke)
Isaac: why would you get uranium when plutonium is so much cheaper and commonly used
Jonathan: you can buy uranium online, government will call you
Failed, kevin cannot nuke motions
Teddy: motion to the left
Nathan: motion to the motion of a paper airplane
Kevin: motion to appologize to noah, he’s in the middle of the room, statistically most likely to be hit
Nathan: (as a ruse to throw a paper airplane at the president) requesting a high five from the president
Kevin: motion to create a standing rule such that if you shank the chair with a paper dagger, he loses 10 hp (failed)
Isaac: motion to create a standing rule such that when you reach 0 hitpoints you become a ghost
Nathan: motion to amend such that if you reach zero hp you must “fake your death” (friendly, been changed)
Nathan: point of information: this will a
Isaac: and the lingering curse, upon faking the death of the holder, is released to the nearest person (has control of the motion, been added)
final: motion to create a standing rule such that when you reach 0 hitpoints you must “fake your death”, and the lingering curse, upon the holder “faking their death”, is released to the nearest person Passed: been stood
Kevin: motion to create a standing rule such that Daniel’s hitpoints are set to 0 at 5:55 on monday 9/2/2024
Passed, Daniel has 3 minutes left to live
RRAS
Daniel: pay dues, 15/sem, 20/yr, 69/min, pay at cmukgb.org/dues, or directly to exec, if you want to be a treasurer, join the discord at cmukgb.org/discord
Teddy: underground tour, come meet us at UC black chairs, 6:30pm.
Daniel: we are tabling at the fair 4:15-6:30pm on the cut, sign up to table, readme is coming out this week
SCHMUCKS
Teddy: filibuster waiting until 5:55
Kevin: this is what jonathan folded, hardly counts as the airplane
Daniel: aaah I died (lingering curse passed to isaac)
Teddy: if for some chance, you don’t want to go to the underground tour and you like grilling burgers, I might need help with that, dm me if you want to do that
Nathan: motion to purple
Kevin: motion to gitfo but the first place will be closed but we have to gitfo to another place then gitfo to another place
