Minutes20240909
OFFICER REPORTS
Daniel: I have an overdue assignment now because I played too much splatoon, thought deadline was 10pm not 10 am
Benner: spent a very long time in package pickup line to get book need to read 2 chapters of tomorrow, as soon as left uc got email about second package which does include the book, might just try to skim the pdf
NEW PEOPLE!!!
Vincent, freshman, from the bay area, physics major, he/they, I coughed earlier
Kevin, ECE, san diego, he/him, this is my first time in posner, breathes, has skin
Alan, CS major, freshman, he/him, suburb near philly ~5.5 hr drive from here, has pretty fluctuating levels of congestion
Teddy: ran out of ADHD medication, CVS refused to give me more, GBGC PH A18B, Friday at 7pm
Nathan: spent almost all my time in the practice rooms, had to learn an entire piece in two days, pravda is out, submit to pravda
Julia: ate kebab pizza, skewers on the pizza
Nathan^Treasurer: did not have a weekend because did not exist
Julia^Isaac: I am sick because the lingering curse has made me ill, I hope to pass it to one of you next week
COMMITTEE REPORTS
Benner: wikipedia: 12 year hoax: synchronized football
Nathan: corn: 3.84$
Teddy: mis animal facts: dogs have legs
Kevin: mis floor is lava: floor is indeed not lava
Kevin: ah mis of committee committee: I’m stealing the floor is lava committee
Nathan: weird monopoly editions: monopoly house divided, white house blue and red, symbols: eagle, peace sign, donkey, elephant, flag, teacup, democrat is chance, republican is community chess
OLD BUSINESS
Benner: has thing
Julia: wants thing
NEW BUSINESS
Benner: motion to create the world domination committee purpose: “world domination”
Benner: KGB dominates the world, world domination committee dominates the KGB
Passed, sold for 3$ to Kevin, chaired by “myself”
Nathan: motion to allocate 1 cent to the world domination committee
Kevin: motion to amend 1 cent to 1 dollar
Julia: motion to amend 1 cent to 10 cents (you have a lot of dimes) friendly, been changed
Benner: motion to amend so it includes that orange in the corner there friendly, been changed
Kevin: motion to amend to 90 cents (unfriendly, not been changed)
Kevin: 50 cents
Kevin: 1 billion cents
Teddy: amend to 10 cents (removing the orange)
Noah: it’s a mandarin
Nathan: ah fruit committee: it’s close enough to an orange
-2 hp to daniel as he is hit with two paper airplanes
Benner: motion to create the committee “how do you hold a paper airplane” purp: “teach me how to fold a paper airplane, I don’t know and I’m feeling left out :(“
Kevin: point of information: first you fold it hotdog style
Kevin: point of information: step 2 unfold it then fold the opposite corners to meet the middle
Nathan: point of information: just steal everyone else’s
Noah: point of information: then you have to fold it like this on both sides
Teddy: point of information: then you go like this (crumples paper into a ball)
Kevin: point of information: the last one wasn’t right
Kevin: it’s a bad idea because then benner will be able to make paper airplanes then we’ll all be dead
Benner: I’m pulling out
Benner: motion to sit in silence for 30 seconds
Kevin: it’s a good idea
Passed, the motion is not well defined
Benner: motion to the left
Noah: motion to the right
Kevin: motion to allocate 70$ for this week’s event for sippy sips and nummy nums
Yara: motion to amend such that summit cola may not be purchased
Kevin: amended to disallow summit cola to be bought
Benner: motion to amend such that milk must be bought
Julia: I would support this if either pepsi or milk is disallowed
Amendment failed, we are not required to get milk
Benner: is 69.69$ still pound defined as the price of one summit cola
Benner (to kevin): are you eating the orange
Kevin: I should not have done that
Benner: motion to mourn Kevin’s passing (ill defined)
Noah: motion to allocate 10$ for antibiotics
Passed, been allocated
Julia: “balance KGB’s budget committee” to “oppose any and all allocations made by the CMU KGB”
Nathan: it’s a bad idea
Nathan: fail by acclamation (objected to)
Failed
Julia: “counting committee” with purpose “to make the votes for all other motions are as close as possible so we can make the chair count”
Kevin: there’s ten of us, so around 5, but we can use abstensions to make it harder to count
Failed
Teddy: motion to create a new standing rule such that if the chair does not recite the number of votes for and against a motion, it automatically passes
Nathan: 5:37, it is
Kevin: fluent in yoda speech, I am not
Teddy: bruh
Kevin: waiting for the end of a minute I am
Benner: hate this standing rule, I do
Noah: motion to amend to also count the abstensions (friendly, been changed)
Passed, been stood
Kevin: motion declaring that this motion has failed
Benner: motion to fail by acclamation
Failed
Kevin: if the motion failed, it succeeded
Daniel: mechanically speaking it failed, it succeeded
Noah: motion to create a standing rule banning logical paradoxes
Benner: motion to amend such that the penalty for mentioning a logical paradox is -50hp and the disappointment of the KGB (friendly, been changed)
Daniel didn’t say the number, it passes
Julia: motion to create a standing rule such that if the chair fails to say the number of votes for passing, failing, and abstaining after a motion, they take 99 hp of damage
Passed, with 0 abstensions, 10 in favor, no opposed, no abstensions again
Kevin: motion to create a standing rule such that if the current chair has less than or equal to 0 hit points, they are ejected from the meeting (not seconded)
Benner: motion to #define 1 as 0
Julia: this might cause issues with auctions
Failed, with 1 abstention, 3 in favor, 6 against, 0 abstaining
Kevin: motion to create the Kevin recruitment committee “to increase the number of Kevins in GBM so that we can gain a majority, and can vote as a block to pass kevin-favorable motions”
Benner: If I change my name legally to kevin, am I included in the bloc
Yara: If I change my name not-legally
Teddy: kevin, how do you know how to illegally
Vincent: what if I go by Kev
Passed, (with I don’t care votes)
Sold for 1$ to Kevin, chaired by all Kevin’s that have been in GBMs for this academic year so far
Kevin: motion to assassinate the president
Benner: shoots daniel with nerf gun several times
Kevin: Isaac picked a bad day to have a sick day
Nathan: motion to salute the president
Teddy: motion to create “the eeeeaaaeeeee committee” purp: “to make the president say oooooeeeeeaaaauuuuuu”
Julia: spelling?????
Failed, 4 abstaining, 3 in favor, 3 opposed, 1 abstaining (again), that is a tie
Daniel: If I pass it will you not shoot me
REAL & RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENTS
Daniel: We r KGB
Teddy: GBGC PH A18B, this friday
Daniel: if you want to be the treasurer and help the rest of exec assassinate me, fill out the form, pay dues
Daniel: Readme, next week, pitch meeting saturday 5pm in DH 1117, meetings every week in POS 146
SCHMUCKS
Nathan: come see the cmu philharmonic, next sunday at 8pm at soldiers and sailors
Kevin: I still have more heath bars
Benner: I ordered a small black coffee at la prima and they gave me a medium instead
Teddy: I’m currently eating a heathbar
Nathan: purple
Benner: seafoam green
Nathan: motion to #2f128c
Teddy: motion to an em wavelength of 10^-10
Benner: motion to fish (color you see when you close your eyes)
Nathan: motion to the color of a heathbar
Teddy: you are a hostage, Daniel
Nathan: gitfo
