Minutes20111219

Officer Reports

   eforney
       Had a weekend!
       saw Sherlock Holmes
       cleaned the office
       found old Thistles
       is getting driven home on Wednesday
   Bubbles
       Had a weekend!
       probably did something
       it probably wasn't studying
       found Clarence, his glove friend
       played a lot of video games - Halo, Tales of Symphonia, Mario Party 4
   tvaughan
       looks like Shelby
       Had a weekend!
       lots 'n' lots 'n' lots of studying
       driving irresponsible roommate around twice
       tried to convince Steven to go home on Tuesday night
   mmeyerho
       Had a weekend!
       Firefly marathon
       Pamela's with Exec
       cleaning the office
       sooo many t-shirts
       got a cool t-shirt
       today: studying for exam tomorrow
       whee, early morning exams
   tbroman
       Had a weekend!
       very hectic--is suddenly moving housing next semester
       got a 91% on the 251 final
       also got a 91 on the Probability final, which was harder
       DiffEQ tomorrow morning, then the midnight train to Chicago
   kharring
       Had a weekend!
       office cleanout
       lots of t-shirts
       will sell them
       today: oh wait, OS final tomorrow
       has to study for OS, but also mailing shoes. Priorities?
   cshaffer
       looks like dmeng
       Had a weekend!
       not on campus
       redacted
       redacted
       redacted
       redacted

Committee Reports

   The Time Police reports: a Time Police song (actual, original, incredibly awesome song by Oren)
   The ad-hoc Out of Order Committee reports failure
   The misappropriated Time Travel Committee reports that the coup of North Korea is going nicely
   The misappropriated Dan Kirby Nightmare in Dreamland Committee reports: really fucking scary. Wound up over there, couldn't see... and albert was there, and oren
   The eforney is Pretty Committee reports: eforney is pretty
   The misappropriated CS Committee is now a dual degree
   The ad-hoc Committee for Horribly Offensive Jokes reports: massive success at the expense of Kim Jong Il
   The Spoken Song Lyrics Committee reports a dramatic reading of "Sexy and I Know It"
   The ad-hoc Eldrich Horror Committee reports: that
   The ad-hoc Assassinations Committee reports: 3 down, 1 to go
   The ad-hoc Readme Accidentally Kills People Committee: last issue had something about Kim Jong Il...
   The misappropriated Russian Reversalism Committee reports: things now look at Kim Jong Il!
   The misappropriated Time Travel Committee reports: go to the North Korea website to see the '90s    

Old Business

   sacunnin gives the thing to dkirby. Not his fault: people who say the holiday greeting that is not appropriate for you

New Business

   create the Cthublic Transportation Committee to the tentacles on the bus go bleh bleh bleh...
       the ad-hoc I Love Being Annoying Committee: do that on the train to chicago...
       the Guys, We Don't Need This Committee notes that Greyhond is already horrifying
       kharring: imagine, all of KGB on one airplane
       what kind of transportation will this committee endorse? cthbuses, cthairplanes, cthelicopters... cthatapults... nyanathulu cats, cthricicles, cthunucycles
       vote: passes
       sold $3 oren, chairs him, whoever was at his table at cheesecake factory

   create the Time Mafia Committee to we are a legitimate family owned time Italian restaurant establishment to serve time pasta
       dkirby: look, look, the time police isn't worried about this, this is small-time small business
       how does this committee feel about the flying spaghetti monster? (fugedaboutit)
       the Time Travel Committee has already purchased this Committee for $10
       the Time Travel Committee bids $5 for this committee
       this is a protection scheme for the international producers of time
       vote: passes
       sold $10 memcginn, chairs DISBANDED

   created the Despicable Boo Committee to it's so fluffy!
       how does this committee feel about time ghosts? (depends whether they are made of cybermen)
       how does this committee feel about time plumbers?
           time is a series of tubes
           time is a series of wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff
       Point of Information: are boos considered quantum locked?
       The ad-hoc We Like Doctor Who Quotes Committee reports success
       and then the fishy village caught fire
       the ad-hoc Committee to Explain Xander's Jokes explains: that's a reference to the fifth avocado, which is a short from albinoblacksheep.com in like 2002
       vote: passes
       sold $1 marlena, chairs all who wears hats with animals and/or boos

   create the Committee to Explain Xander's Jokes for somebody to figure out and explain Xander's jokes
       xander: oh mighty son, burn away the night so that I might enjoy my coffee and bacon
       vote: passes
       sold $2 tbroman, chairs him, booth chairs

   create the Time Traveling Salesman Committee to deliver packages in O(1) time
       that was the biggest foreshadowing since the title of Death of a Salesman
       "when you absolutely positively need it there yetserday"
       how does this committee feel about the time traveling sales tax?
       will it have bees?
       memcginn: motion to change the name of the committee to the Death of a Time Traveling Salesman Committee - fails
       return this package for me?
       how do committees feel at all?
       committees are people too!
       how does this committee feel about the Bootstrap Paradox? - it's within P; P=NP
       vote: passes
       sold $3 mmeyerho, chairs her and the bug in the room

   create the North Korean Weapons of Mass Hilarity Committee to as you know, North Korea is not one of the smartest countries in the world--comically large slingshot
       what if North Korea released one bug into a bunch of rooms into the pentagon? what if that?
       South Korea is very reliant on small flying units
       skaefer: no discussion, just watching the bug
       vote: passes
       sold $1 memcginn, chairs anybody who finds North Korea jokes hilarious

   create the Learned Combi, Forget Basic Math Committee to pay tirbute to the fact that some people did better on concepts than calc finals
       the bug in the room takes up dV of the volume of the room
       took concepts to get out of calc 2 requirement
       you've been using letters so long you've forgotten how to use numbers! that's where you'll fail!
       the ad-hoc Committee of People who have Taken Combi says: you don't know what you're talking about...
       eforney got 14th nationally on a combi test? she can math
       the ad-hoc Random Antidote Committee: really?
       the Committee to Put Words in eforney's Mouth approves of this
       vote: passes
       sold $2 memcginn, chairs later

   create the Time Pasta Establishment Committee to definitely be a legitimate time pasta establishment
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Time Mafia Committee - friendly
       motion to change the name of the committee to the Definitely Legitimate Time Strip Club Committee - fails
       the Time Police move to change the name to the Time Donut Establishment Committee - unfriendly
       motion to postpone until we have time travel - fails
       motion to append "wink wink" to the purpose - friendly
       the Time Travel Committee is already here, that motion was redundant
       the Time Traveling Salesman Committee asks: do you need a delivery person?
           (how do you feel about "time organs"?)
       time is money
       vote: passes as the Time Mafia Committee with purpose "to definitely be a legitimate time pasta establishment, wink wink"
       sold $6 amckinni, chairs steven, him, marlena, eforney

   create the Money Travel Committee to to be an alias for the Time Travel Committee
       motion to change the purpose to "to move money from point A to point B" - frienly
       point of information: would building a freeze ray make all the committees made today pretty much all redundant?
       the Time Mafia Committee extends its protection to this committee... for a small fee
       the Repeat That in Song Committeealso offers its protection
       Pedro also offers his protection
       dkirby: you have to stop the time travel now! I'm from the future!
       I don't remember the name ... regular and future dan kirby in the same room?
       vote: passes with purpose "to move money from point A to point B"
       sold $4 tbroman, everyone not chairs of the Time Travel Committee

   create the Random Antidote Committee to oh snakebite? try this, worked with a jellyfish
       motion to change the purpose to oh a snakebite? choose a number 1 through 5 (friendly)
       change purpose to oh a snakebite? roll this d6 (friendly)
       DM says you die. roll a d6
       you got bit by a snake. and rocks fall. everyone dies.
       vote: passes
       sold $5 egladdin, chairs anybody who is currently poisoned

Announcements

   No events! (except winter break)    
   Bring fancy clothes back from break!
   t-shirts will be sold
   Booth: we have a lot of stuff done, stuff will be done over break... if you have art ideas, draw them and send them to Xander

Schmucks

   the bswolf memorial committee thinks we wasted the most time of any other meeting...
   people of new jersey: don't lock your doors...
   adjourn due to quorum