Minutes20190114

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EXEC

   Ian had a break. Did some therapy. Art therapy surprisingly helpful. "what are you doing?" "oh i don't know just planning my project." reinvented knitting but with graph theory. buy ian's self help book. be a patreon (doesn't have a patreon)
       append: mood hypercube. sphere to cone axis. no idea what it meant. spent an hour in group therapy discussing it. 
   Dez had a break. Did too much math. entirely too much. got almost ice cream (frozen custard). strictly better. 
       new people:
       Evan. double in cs and math. new jersey. if i said something wouldn't that make it interesting. shoes are black.
           Ian "sorry about new jersey though"
       Katie. business. california. i'm a human being.
           Ian "big mood"  
   Kate is not here. Cory is Kate today. had a break. hung out with Dez a lot. went to cancoon with people from elementary school. had a hell of the time getting back. real kate probably wanna tell it.
       Event: Potluck in the Porker/Bader. Make and eat food. cold so going to porter. Friday at 7, come eat. we prefer to eat our snow indoors
   Ellen had a break. learned how much allergy med needed to cope with family's new hypoallergenic dog. have a pravda.
   Janny had a break. did too much of nothing. existed on couch and bed. 
   Aren had a break. endured the pittsburgh cold so you guys don't have to. dnd character is chaotic stupid. found out guns don't go pew pew. they go bang bang.
   Mitch had a break. went to Italy. got duffel bag. anti-theft. got stolen and it was empty. it was inside another bag.

COM REPORTS

   c: super trash bros
       homestar runner is 6 games away from the walking dead universe. based on a long chain of crossovers.
       5 to thanos.
   c: friends
       blood.
       new fangle science witches. tell where and who a humor comes from. don't leave blood at the crime scene anymore guys.
   c: everyday that passes the internet goes further into memeverse
       instagram account. 1 post. 4.4mil followers. that one post has 34.5mil likes. it's a picture of a brown egg. 
   c: ad hoc see kgb is a useful club
       scs sample resume for freshman. coco has cmukgb listed as her first activity.
   c: ad hoc egg
       egg.
   c: misapp stupid history
       french revolution is very stupid. french ppl like symbols and not effort. prison had 7 ppl there when they stormed the thing. 3 people were crazy. did it cause yeah. fuck yeah. fuck the government.
       technically rauen's ancestors where nobility so they got fucked.
       the crazy people were hallucinating like crazy. they thought people were coming to kill them. they were set free and became heroes but were still hallucinating like crazy
   c: stupid history
       ferdinand. 
       new tank had massive transmission issue. put largest gun onto this tank. set it loose and surprisingly only half broke down. only 30 were left existing from 100+ original.
       Ian's addition: lion mascot of drug resistance program. there was a porn of him jacking off and smoking weed. 
       Artemis's response: one prof sent an email titled "where in the world is IA 160. no one actually knew where it was. that naming's kinda bad." 
   c: ad hoc why is cmu campus so complicated
       was mckenna's 112 term project. 
       today had to find classroom for 15150 (IA 150). it is actually in posner hall.
   c: ad hoc campus history
       what is labelled on map of posner is the same thign except they didn't unify the name. the exchange + glass ceiling = posner. attached bit = gsia. but business students call it tepper.
       Raun's addition: finals registrar still call posner tepper. 
   c: culinary standards
       pgh = culinary wasteland
   c: tepper horcrux
       the monstrousity being built is part of tepper. but has no name. anyone who call it tepper is wrong but what else would you call it. 

OLD BUSINESS

   The thing is with Henry is Washington DC
       Ian "that actually sounds like his fault"
       Rauen is trying to get the spirit of the thing to Mitch McConnel.
           To: Mitch McConnel (Rauen for the next x minutes)
           Not Fault = government shutdown.
           Fault = the government. and new update for govt shutdown.
   Orders of the day
   1. #define i play pot of greed 
       tabled for 2 weeks.
   2. 
   c: time capsule
       m: tabled for 3 years. 3 months and 2 weeks.?
           nah we're not satisfied yet. will make an mp3 for the song.
       m: table for a month.
           passed.

NEW BUSINESS

   m: egg
       egg!
   c: diluting snow analysis
   p: [bilabial nasal ingressive (transcription of a sniff)]
       i heard that if you like the walls something changes
           what does the antibacterial gel taste like.
           if you really need to lick the wall for some ungodly reasons use antibacterial gel. 
           your action is not endorsed by the kgb as an organization.
           a freshman looked at it. rauen said the walls previously tasted delicious but they replaced it with lead paint. she was like "huh" and walked away.
           had the compulsion to like the switch cartridge. didn't lick it.
       $2 to Aren. chair = whoever designed mini rashid.
   c: guinea pig
   p: discover the side effects of licking antibacterial things or the wall.
       take guinea pigs. make them lick the walls and fill out forms.
           use lab rats. they're more controlled.
       cmu kgb war criminals: all rats are on cocaine. they aren't controlled. 
           unfortunately your research cannot be published.
           p of info: if all rats are on cocaine it is a standard group.
       p of info: bacteria are bad for you. eating antibacterial things are good for you.
       "mom i'm not shitfaced i'm cleaning my stomach"
       p of info: are we antibacterial.
           we are out gut flora. 
           didn't john green write a book about that?
           Ian took modern bio. a special kind of pneumonia where each part has different kinds of bacteria.
       $3 to Woody. chair = everyone who's gonna go home and lick a switch cartridge (everyone who's predestined to lick)
   c: bacteria appreciation
   p: request report from prez about the good boys
       they're good boys but can affect image processing. bacteria are genetically swole. can get actual resistance.
       some bacteria are genetically destined to survive antibacteria gel. so privileged they survived? 
           that's the bio film and it sucks.
       c: bio people need to get better
           what is statistics? ah the letter p
       you know that one professor who got kicked out of her class by the school. she taught the next class. only gave A's and B's if you don't cheat. 
           stangle. intro probability course. 225 that one semester. she was the head of statistics at duke.
       so, bacteria, let's appreciate them
       $4 to cory. chair = me and you and whoever the best boy is.
           "wow you need a very tiny chair"
   c: mao zi dong did nothing wrong. joseph stalin is ballin.
   p: to bring the great leap forward even more forward.
       fill the archive. been filled.
   c: name the building in the tepper quad
   p: dick measuring contest.
       kgb as an organization does not have enough funding. if we did, we could name it after ourselves. 
       new p: light themed gates
           sure.
       if tepper is a bigger blacker dick, can we name this building the bigger blacker ball?
           strong no. declared false.
       we could call it tax fraud inc. 
   Summary:
   c: name the building in tepper quad
   p: light themed gates
       $2 to Dez. chair = yoshi
   m: alloc <= $69 for supplies 
       it's a good idea.

REAL ANNOUNCE

   event: potluck in the porker/bader. come. bring food and/or eat food. will be food for free unless you paid to cook the food. friday in A18* probably. come and eat and have fun. freshmen you gotta cook now! sheets on event post. bring food. eat food.
   annual meeting on April 15. look forward to it please. we have important shit tm. elections. exciting bit at the end where new exec is confused. not bylaws stuff. 
   auctions are real ass money we use. you don't have to buy anything. membership is $15 for sem, $20 a year. no need for membership cause everything's cool and free. but membership gives you discount and you get to vote. and love (also given if you're not a member)
   booth. sarah has stepped down as booth chair. we are deciding whether to do a blitz booth (half sized) or no booth at all. if you have strong opinions please come to exec meeting. wed 3.30 UC 329. if you can't make it let someone on exec know. 
       booth builds can be fun cause it's a bonding experience for the whole kgb. 

SCHMUCKS

   itr. this saturday. 10pm. come stab jasper. 
   scs hunt. do you like puzzles? do you like cs? feb 23! half sized puzzle hunt. fun. scs themed. the day after scs day.
   aren wants to go to the mattress factory. helium ball exhibition. this sunday or the next sunday. come talk to aren if interested. free access with cmu/pitt id.
       the ball exhibit is having issues. call beforehand.