Minutes20190121

EXEC

   Ian had a weekend. not much notable happened. played pigment. it didn't like water. walked into water and started drowning. half the pigment died and felt kinda guilty. fire electricity water poison explosion. also weird dreams happened. where you piece it together for half an hour afterwards. driving artemis somewhere. stopped at a store. artemis stayed in the car. went to store. went back. artemis hacked the car. brakes no longer worked.

   Dez had a weekend. rediscovered tower defense games and went to phantom for the first time since october. subscribed to spiderman. had 5-13 sitting there. spent $60 on comic books.

   Kate had a break. transportation. total commute of 4 hours to and from baltimore & dc was the least bad. had a week after transportation hell ended (last monday). started during meeting. at mellon in a class from 4.30-6.30 on mondays. talked to prof last sem and he said he might be able to move the class. but, propel is on monday 6.30-8pm. so class can't be moved. kate offered to come to only half of those classes. let's see how this goes. can still cmoe to meeting i guess. 
       m to salute ken hovis. 

   Ellen had a weekend. tried to stay inside and warm. younger sib finished reading homestuck. consider herself official bad influence.

   Janny had a weekend. did nothing much, just worked and stayed outside more than necessary. also had last week. intro to chinese language and culture. half the class is korean. half the class are ABCs with identity crisis. strangely reassuring. 
       hash is D=13

   Aren is not here. artemis is aren. Artemis had a weekend. hadn't done homework. starting it now. wrote lots of forms. ran out of letters. started to play fortnite.

   Mitchell had a weekend. catching up on an entire week of being very intimate with the toilet (build 18 project)

BOOTH

   the booth chair cannot commit because of family issues. it's best for us to not do booth this semester. but, we have to come up with something else to do. we might still have a plot on midway so maybe do something that's a good feasible shitpost. enough work that everyone could be involved. want similar load but not the same stakes. 
       Event: tool training. anyone who's not already done booth. teaching you how to not accidentally kill yourself with a saw or drill. we will rebuild, do maintenance, and prepare for booth for future years. train you to be good booth gremlins!
           friday 7pm at the kage (cmukgb.org/kage)
       if you have shitpost ideas, tell exec and let us know. 
       we think the spring carnival committee loves us!! let's see how far we can take that. 

COMMITTEE REPORTS

   c: ww2 history
       operation run by everyone in the british spying agency mi5. plan was the distribute fake orders and convince germans that they were real. found corpse from rat poison. dress up as fictional officer and a pilot. gave bag full of documents which is a correspondence between real brits. convince to not invade sicily. psanish ppl found it and gave them to germans. they fell for it. one person involved was the creator of james bond. he's a hack writer.

   c: assassinate the president
       it's mine. i know where you sleep. i have access to your bedroom.

   back to booth ideas
       we are looking for shitpost ideas. 
       - small booth inside plot on grass

   c: woody memorial 
       deposit still going strong. we got it. jan 28.

   c: stupid history
       find a corpse and drop into ocean is a good way to fake a death. 

   c: pravda
       we found some paper lying around. next to a board saying god is a woman. apparently some choir was here. 

   c: comic books are stupid
       recent arcs of spiderman. someone stole everyone everything. including one particular squirrel from squirrel girls. forgot to turn ms marvel's phone off. found it using find my phone.

   c: bad typography
       in music you are supposed to put hyphens between syllables of the same word. 

OLD BUSINESS

   The thing
       spirit at Mitch McConnell. The thing is in DC. 
       goes to Liam
           not fault = Petersen graph
           fault = all other graphs including minors and extensions of petersen graph. don't bring back petersen graph. kill it

   Orders of the day
   1. m: that
       (tabled until the next blood moon)
       table until the next super wolf blood moon? that's some furry bullshit. oh no all furries are howling at the moon and it got scared and hide. 
           r7 colonial would like to know if it can use the super wolf blood moon for several plots?
       amend to m:awoo?
           nah
       amend to m:this?
           p of info: next super wolf blood moon is 203x.
           passed.
       now we are in the motion to this 
       table until the next super wolf blood moon? passed

NEW BUSINESS

   m: salue tim but with like a heart because we appreciate him putting up with our bullshit.
       "fuck you tim" with a heart.

   run the archive
       2. m: assign $5 of every event allocation for cheetos paws.
           m: pretend this motion was never made
               stop that.
           c: culinary standards
               we will still have cheetos paws ice cream
           p of info: what will algore taste like?
               human flesh
           p of info: does that cause memory overflow?
               those $5 may not be allocated. but the allocations are not yet initialized.
           p of info: when did this become a coding club?
               about 19xx.
               it never became a coding club. it was here. 
           fish fish fish fish coding something something
           passed! but this motion is pointless

   m: alloc <=$100 for this week's food and drinks
       we have pizza and not kill yourself with a drill
       p of info: can i drill a pizza

   m: standing rule that non-Kate 2vp or S@A in the future have to spend at least $5 for each event to buy cheetos paws
       this might require a bylaws amendment.
       replace "have to spend" with "may elect to collectively agree to spend"
           ya
       tried to look up cheetos paws. they're not being made? 
       passed!

we have C standing rules left.

   p of info: cheetos paws. first result on ebay was $15000 entry of funny cheetos paws

   m: standing rule that future presidents of kgb will spend exec discretionary fund on shaped cheetos paws
       failed!

   m: salute liam
       "that was the most half hearted salute"

   m: bylaws amendment to start meeting at 4.20pm
       we can't move our meetings cause class times.

   c: r7 central imperial authority
   p: control all the other r7 committees there are like four of them now
       new p: to dissolve all of the r7 committees
           unfriendly
       new c: r7 committee vore fetishism
           unfriendly. strong motion. 
           passed!
       m: change "vore" to "war"
           seconded. 
           m: amend with the quantum superposition between "vore" and "war"
               misapp. im a physicists and i hate my life: this is how quantum superposition works right guys
               passed.
       m: append to end of purpose a quantum sup of "omnomnom" and "pewpewpew"
           passed
       m: tell dez to stay in the 1vp lane
           "stay in the 1vp lane"
       summary
       c: r7 committee |vore> + |war> fetishism
       p: control all the other r7 committees there are like four of them now |omnomnom> + |pewpewpew>
       $8 to Tim. chair=anyone who has not lived in r7.

REAL ANNOUNCE

   we don't have a booth but we have an event. come to kage (stever basement) see cmukgb.org/kage
       we will teach you how to not hurt yourself or woody with a drill. 
   if you have fake booth shitpost ideas, let exec knows

   we are kgb exec. open meetings. wednesday 3.30pm in uc329. ah. feel free to come and see how we get things done.

   activities fair on wednesday. we are folding a bunch of paper hats. we'll have a table in one room and suspiciously handing out hats in another room.
       if you wanna help handout hats, come be sketchy.

   if you have an opinion on when ctfws is, vote on facebook.
       p of question: what is facebook?
           connor i know you have a facebook because you haven't accepted my friend request. 
       feel free to check our poll in tiktok.

SCHMORKS

   kgb discord. if you don't have an invite link, we can send you one. tell dez.

   is graph theory the horniest subfield of math? in this essay i will-
       manifolds are drawn like dicks. shout out to tensors and etc etc for having a dick looking manifold with a plane and an x looking like a sphincter.
       horny math book club, that's your assigned reading.