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Officer Reports


Todd is out of order. Weekend was full of Puzzle Hunts. Lasted all day and made him go "aaaaaaaaah".

Found a link to a fan translation of Mother 3. (Squeal to Earthbound). Hella Dark, which is why it will never be released here.


Last week was hell week. So much stuff. Thus week was awesome! Build a house. Played with Legos. Seven our call of Cthulhu game.

New People: None


Arm rest on the chair makes it hard to stand.

Event: Emo Poetry. PHA18*. Bringing a Coffee or Espresso maker encouraged.

Weekend started on Thursday. Friday had an exam. Friday also had an event. Saturday did very little. Sunday did puzzle hunt all day long.


Aaaaah! Weekend. Three dance shows. Five more this week. One tonight right after this thing. Mom came, needed to be entertained. Gone now. Last week of dance shows.


Need an officer catch phrase. "Is writing all of this down"


Weekend, OS, Desperate Housewives. All at the same time. Phone interviews go really well or really bad. Eating a tube of frosting is a bad idea.


Had a weekend. Remembers most of it, a few parts are cloudy. Cleaning out wallet, shredded the wrong ATM card.


Pop Occultism

Preview of tonight's ESG: A devival on behalf of the church of the sub-genius.

The limit to your abilities is where you place it -- place it Bob's hands.

You have a heart of gold -- shred off just a little bit and sell it for $30 and get salivation or triple your money back from Bob.

Actions speak louder than talks -- actions seldom use bad grammar

Two hardest things to handle in life...

Talent is a flame. Genius is a fire. Bob is a alien parasite.

You will do well to expand your business - $30 for eternal salvation. (cheaper than Scientology)

Wean 5316 for more.

Committee to get Dr Quxuum to buy more committee's

Ben Wolf owes me money.

Ben Wolf: We both already paid the treasurer.

Gratuitous Obscenities

Asks Committee not to burn down Roselawn 7: What did I miss?

How young is Rauhit Committee

Gets a Facebook tomorrow!




Geoff wins!

Steelers committee

Steelers beat the Bengals by 4 touchdowns. But its the Bengals.

Committee to not burn down Roselawn Seven

Continued Lack of Failure.

Storytelling Committee

Charles the second. The King of Spain. 5 generations, should have 64 inputs. Had 10.

Had lots of stuff horribly wrong with him.

How to Destroy Children:

 Conner James Sites-Bowen
 ^ Given Name
        ^ Middle Name
              ^Dad's Last Name and Mother's Last Name combined
 ^ Tells him apart from other Sites-Bowen
 Some cultures give you two first name <--- Do that to children
 Some cultures give you middle name <--- Do that to children
 Children could be like, FN1, FN2, MN1, SB-R
 Or like, mix up order of last names, but where would cool middle names games?
 How to make things worse? Iceland.
 Four related people, all have different last names. So passports suck
 Now is getting complex... make it worse? SPAIN!
 Town where oldest living related person was born gets appended to your name.
 Korean generational names? (we don't talk about that)

Booth Committee

 Want to be a booth chair? Send us an email!
 Carnival Themes? Send Liz an email!

Misappropriation Committee (Storytelling)

 Brother and Sister went to highschool with him. Surname was "Ed". Syrian. Family name was "Used". Great-grandfather was asked name, was like "Used". Guy thought he said "Us Ed". And so they became "Ed".

Old Business

David forgot the thing. So it is not his fault that there are giants in our midst and Alan's wife is dead.

New Business

$50 allocated for Event.

Passed by acclamation

$20 for assassins prizes

In Favor: Lots. Opposed: 2. Abstain: Some

Motion to create the R-button committee

Purpose: Fill a finger with a wish?

Press it twice to do a barrel roll

Pigeon holing finds you creepy and approves.

Thinking arrr-bys

In Favor: RRRRRR!

Opposed: LLLLL!

Abstain: ZZZZZ!

Sells for $6 to Karpur. Fox to chair

Motion to create the committee to rename the Office of Admissions to the Ministry of Truth

Peter Parker and Harry Potter have applied.

Rename to Office of Admissions is the Ministry of Truff. Not friendly or pursued.

Committee to rename the Office of Admissions the Department of Mysteries (purpose hasn't changed)

Office of Admissions to the Ministry of Double-Stuff Oreos (purpose hasn't changed)

In Favor: Think how good double-stuff oreos are.

Opposed: Think about how awesome it would've been if we had kept it as the Department of Mysteries

Abstain: Wonder what the original motion was.

$2 to Shawn. Labbott and Shawn to chair.

Motion to create the barrel roll committee

Purpose: To do retro video reference.

  • video game references*

KGB klassic coming up

  • video game references*
  • glisson acts out tetris*

Ad Hoc Mister Saturn approves, boing.

  • zelda music*

Goob: I hunger

(We forgot to vote)

In Favor: Zelda Music

Opposed: Blow on the cartridge

Abstain: Unplug your television

Passes: $50 to Karpur. Karpur, Andy and Samus to chair.

Motion to Create the turning of Science Fiction into Reality

Portal gun committee approves

General Relativity: Do calculations of warp-drive space time, works with dark matter.

I'm afraid I can't let you do that Alan.

Conner-Sites Bowen Memorial Robot Approves

Use for boothly purposes

Where is my flying car.

Approve, so do clones.

Hamster Lazer Disco Clock -- textbook uses star-trek references to do physics

Steam punk approves

Earth is dumb, throw rocks at it.

Interstellar highway.

Need unobtainium.

In Favor: Spout a sci-fi reference.


Abstain: Porno Squid! $7 to Dru Quxuum. Will be disbanded later. Zsparks to chair.

Motion to create the "Its a Trap" committee

Purpose: Elect Admiral Ahkbar President.

Stunning that we haven't though of this before.


  • Battlestar Galactica Reference*

In favor of concentrating all firepower on that super star destroyer?

Drill Hoff for Oil?

Did Many Bothans die to bring us this Committee?

In Favor: Talk about how perfectly safe it is here.

Opposed: Red Baron?

Abstain: Cough?

$5 to Rocketmatt. Himself, Zsparks, and anyone who wants to chair. And Admiral Akhbar.


Need CTFWS Judges: Email exec. Don't need to judge every game.

Puzzle Hunt: November 1st. If you can't play, playtest.


ESG! 6:30 PM to get a church of the sub-genius devival.

Space time and faster than light travel.