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       Had a weekend
       there was an event
           it turned into MIT Mystery Hunt
           which was some BULLSHIT but also fun
       went skiing on Saturday and now everything hurts
           well, most of everything
       whiplash is a thing that he has
           if anyone ever has whiplash and then they rub the back of their neck, they're wrong
           it's when you hurt the front of your neck by throwing your head back
       on Sunday kept discovering deadlines were farther back then he thought
           and then just...not doing work
       had a weekend
       there was an event
           brought Forbidden Desert
           and then died
       and then played some more games
           doesn't remember what those games were because Stuart wasn't part of them
       new people
           Michael, Econ and Math, Maryland, likes cookies
           Craig, Physics and Philosophy, from a place, likes cookies
       had a weekend
           played Forbidden Desert
           ate unforbidden dessert
       more games
           Tool Training
           Friday, 7:00, Kage (under Stever)
               entrance is on the driveway between Stever and Morewood
           go to learn how to use tools for BOOTH
           you should come no matter what it's fun and you can learn skills
           it basically turns into the first build
       had a weekend
       played games
       opened boxes from home, because her family moved from Illinois
           found ALL of the old Pokemon cards
           Pokemon ensued
       this morning
           in a class called Social History of Animation
           until now it's been protoanimations, like Sylvester the Cat, and there hasn't been sexual content
               she should have known better, it's an art class
           this new cartoon was not socially acceptable
               it was from the 20s, so only sex was unacceptable
               it was reasonable until the horse
               "The Adventures of Everready Hardon"
                   if you want to google it
       can't top that
       had a weekend
           played some games
           did some work
       had a weekend
       involved board games
           played Flashpoint
               cried twice, rejoiced once
       had a weekend
       besides boardgames tried to do work
           just puttered around until they remembered Spectacular Spider-Man
       lab inspection happened, which means they had to clean up
           and thus, they couldn't find ANYTHING


   ad hoc Preemptive Racism Committee
       haha, MLK joke
       okay we're done
   ad hoc Peer To Peer File Sharing Committee
       if you recieve a copy of a textbook from a friend...
       don't show that copy to a professor who wrote that textbook
   Daniel John Kirby Is So Full Of Himself Committee
       he's sick
   ad hoc Physical PUNishment Committee
       told too many jokes this weekend got pun?
       ((okay I have no idea what this joke was anymore))
   the funniest part of Marlena's story is that there was a bagger in the classroom
   bswolf Memorial Committee
       wants to nip all jokes about the football teams coming from two states with pot legalized in the bud
   Innovative Technologies Committee
       was gonna have a lab inspection
       the inspector got eaten by the big furry monster that's taken up sitting outside the lab
       so if you want to be an inspector, there's an opening
   Illustrious Journalist Collective
       there's a strange being outside the Innovative Technologies Committee
       Guild of Calamitous Intent and Evil Seafood League claim culpability
       also the coffee break mayor came back and his secretary had to pee real bad
       okay I lost the plot sorry
       it was one sentence
   Skyentology Committee
       they have meds that will get rid of the monster
       who takes the meds?
   251 Torture Committee
   ad hoc Winter Is Coming Committee
       Caroline looked at the weather
       today is the last day for a week it'll be above 20
   ad hoc Metric Conversion Committee
       it's been below 0 all week


   The Thing!
       recieving a really old copy of a textbook from a friend is not Sam's fault


   Interesting Facts About Bees Committee: to talk about interesting facts about bees*
       motion to strike each instance of a double "e" following a "b"
       we should bring Bubbles in with his bees bees bees shirt
       bees die in the cold because they're like college students
       ad hoc Nicolas Cage Committee: disapproves
       place "" around "bs"
       if you write the word bed it looks like a bed
           the "b" is the headboard
       every bee's favorite band is cascada
           you said interesting facts, not true
       bees never poop inside their hives
           when it's warm enough outside there's a mass poop and corpse exodus
       is "bees" defined as "people in cluster"?
       in the word "alphabet", the "bet" comes from "beta", which is like a greek "b"
       thank you for subscribing to bee facts
           to unsubscribe, text "unsubscribe" to 442242
       did you know that bees are considered that bees are considered the world's best tango dancers?
       there used to be a twitter under the name truebeefacts
       there is a bee sitting in your head currently
       $2 to Frieder, he and anyone else suffering from a bee injury
   The Best Possible Outcome Of A Story That Starts With ______: things could be worse
       did you know that there's always a bee on you at all times
       so Maija got hit by a car last month
           the best possible outcome of getting hit by a car
               Bill Gates having hit you and donating his fortune
                   that's how SCS got funded
       $5 to Stuart, anyone who had a bad day will chair
   we're rules wanking about money
   and talking about printing money
   new Mike belongs here
   Time Travel Committee
       there are shenanigans
   Real Actual OTP Committee: to discuss otps and ot3s
       for example, Woody from Toy Story and George Washington
       $5 to Erin, anyone with an otp will chair
   motion to create Fuck
       can it have a purpose?
       motion for the general body of the KGB recognise the previous motion as a motion to append "fuck" to the KGB Official Dictionary
       as a linguist eforney would like to mention that fuck is one of the most VERSITILE words
       Everyone's A Linguist Committee: fuck
       this will give the KGB Official Dictionary the ability to create actual sentences
       but this will make "second" not the second word
       Dyslexia Committee: no, the dictionary does not have to be in order
       ad hoc This Is How I Pay My Rent Committee
           this will make Maija's work much easier
           how's that going?
               much better now that she's switched to pen and paper
   motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50,000 so that the journalists don't die
   Artistic Pornographic Discussion Committee: to watch porn in class and discuss it
       Snarky Freshmen Committee: can this be an Interp topic?
       and that's how Drew watched porn in cluster
       TBA is scheduled for April 9
       how many units is this porn watching worth?
           between 9 and 10
       did you know that Ron Jeremy's grandmother recieved fanmail for him?
           he used to have the same initials as her, but after this happened a couple times she made him change his name
       how many eunuchs is this committee worth?
           spell eunuchs
       is this committee going to respect the fact that Ron Jeremy was Jewish?
       how many Linux is this committee
           nooooo Linux
       motion to "playtest"
       misappropriated Don't Worry It's For Science Committee: approves
       append to purpose "for the plot"
       we have an event!
       actually it's not for science it's for art
       motion to change CMU to a liberal arts collecge
           oh god no
       motion to append "for art for science" to the purpose
       ad hoc Unsubtle Innuendos Committee: BLOWJOBS
       motion to crosslist course in the theater department
       $6 to McGinnis, anyone who would sign up for that class
   motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for food for the event
   Unsubtle Innuendos Committee: KGB training Kage, oh wait I mean BLOWJOBS
       Marlena has a cage in her basement
       so there Drew was, watching porn in cluster
       these aren't innuendos they're just dirty words
           look we don't need the blow by blow here
       so there Maija was, writing porn in the KGB meeting
       Considerite Literate Inteligent Thoughts Committee: doesn't feel the need to make commnet
       let's not make this any harder than it needs to be
       motion to lower the average age of the KGB to 14
           that would require a large influx of 8 year olds or a small influx of babies
           which can happen
       yeah no not writing that
       $7 to Xander, anyone who misses twright will chair
   I Need An Adult Committee: to designate an official adult when things get too KGB
       Caroline nominates eforney
           out of order
       Maija, can we hear some of your porn?
           let her edit it first
       being an adult is not about being mature, it's about knowing when to act mature
       motion to designate "apple juice" as the codeword
           out of order
       we need a better definition of an adult
       motion to deisignate "apple juice" as the safeword
           out of order
       being an adult means you get to drink as much alcohol as you want, make as many pancakes as you want, and drive really fast cars
           so you mean Nicolas Cage?
           it's not specified that you have to do these things legally
       motion to nominate Barak Obama as our adult
           out of order
       go to your room and sit on your hands
           what are my hands doing?
       $6 to Drew, eforney shall chair
   motion to designate Barak Obama as the official adult of the KGB
       change "Barak Obama" to "Barab Obabo, somthing of unitinu"
       motion to change the adult to Mr. Rogers
   Filthification Committee: make clean songs obscene
       Frieder needs an adult
       oh, Canada!
           my grandpa sells condoms to sailors
           and punctures the tips with pins
           it just gets worse from there
       Shelby's mom used to work in a pharmacy in the 70s
       Drew needs an adult
       Rick Santorum's wife used to shack up with an abortion doctor in law school
       don't go to Chick Fil A tomorrow
           they're doing a day for the Duck Dynasty guy
           there'll be lots of camo
           it's scary
   motion to pass a motion
   Princess Leia Reminder Committee: to remind exec when something is not a committee
       how does this committee feel about Cinnabons?
       I have a bad feeling about this
       motion to put this committee in a metal bikini
           it's a trap
       I feel like this committee is being made for Alderan reasons
       never tell me the odds
       $3 to McGinnis, he and anyone who hasn't seen all 6(3) starwars movies
   Beatbox Committee: gimme back my money!
       motion to add 30% more wub wub
       have you tried rapping the box
           only on Boxing Day
       JRAM tried to drop some beats but vegetables ended up everywhere
       $4 to McGinnis, the box will chair


       Tool training!
       Friday, 7:00, in the Kage (storage space below Stever)
       learn to use equipment or teach the use of equipment and/or build
       anyone can come to any event
           so come! even if you don't do booth
       $20 for members, $25 for nonmembers
       if you've ordered one you're obligated to buy it
       go to Dillon, hand him the appropriate amount of money, THEN retrieve your sweatshirt
           in that order
   there were some games left at the event last Friday
           a set of Set
           also one with lasers?
   Dillon didn't bring the treasury (oops)
       we need small bills if you can pay in those
   the event after this one (in 11 days) is the Useless People Auction
       if you want to auction off 6 hours of your time, email exec with a blurb of skills
       if you're uncomfortable because there's someone you don't want to purchase you, email Marlena
           or if you're uncomfortable with emailing her, email someone else on exec
       if you're not a CMU student you can still auction yourself off


   if anyone has storage space near Maggie Mo, Xander needs a space to store his calligraphy stuff
       he'll compensate you in cash or other
   today is MLK day and we're mostly white
       so Dan and friends might watch the Star Trek episode that is relevant
       meet up after KGDinner
   trying to do ballet in boots hurts

we are now in purple