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Minutes 8/28

Officer Reports:

       -Lost in park, airbnb hostess peed on carpet
       -Learned to cook, scavhunt was fun
       -Cut off fly head, group theory
       -Factory work, turned into the Ubermensch
       -jack shit
       -Newral Nootwerks
       -Too many fly head

Committee Reports:

   Main Naturalism- Main invaded Canada, battle ended when a blackbear scared both sides
   Curiosity killed the cat furry- OwO what's this
   Pop occultism- A good time to finish up old tasks
   Assassinate the treasurer- How are we different from the Russians
   We're a fake real socialist organization
   a Skyeku??
   misappropriated Assassinate the President
       Skye has finally fallen
   Actual committee to assassinate the president 
       we have a spy
   Ad-hoc KGB is better at memes than you are
       Since we went flyering with surreal memes, someone else did it with shitty mallard ducks
   Moment of silence for MS paint

Old Business:

   The thing: Joe forgot it
   Bork- Everything but forgetting what to say
   Orders of the day: Nothing!

New Business:

   Commitee for Ferret-Safe Nooks and Crannys
       - Eliminate la-z-boyz
       -What constitutes folding?
       -Does a bean bag with someone in it count as a sandwich?
       -A couch made only of dryer tubes?
       -Ferret out of dryer tubes?
       -What if we upholstered a ferret
       -Call the question thank god
       -5 to Quuxum
       -Chaired by anyone who's owned a ferret
   Committee for nesting tubular rodents between thighs
   Union of concerned CW scientists
       -Time travel bullshit
       -Now Struct of concerened CW Scientists
       -Now Struct of Concerened CW Knower-People
       -3 to Henry
       -Chair by anyone who watches Legends of Tomorrow
   KGB Injokes I still don't get committee
       -The Number 7?
       -KGB Injokes that are older than me Committee
       -3 to Quuxum
       -Chair: anyone over the age of 30
   Holofractal Committee
       -Figure out why gravity spins so much by making it a Torus
       -Now Figure out why Gravity Spins so Much by Making it a Gemini
       -Assume gravity is a sphere of uniform density
       -Is this a dodge Gemini?
       -Now the purp is Ain't no Holofractgirl
       -4 to Em
       -Chaired by Em and people who can get better names for that Cowboy
   Better Data Plan committee
       -To Avoid all the roaming treasurer charges
       -2 to Rauen
       -Chaired by Rauen and Joe
   Make an allocation to buy some heelys for Ian
   175$ for UG Tour
   Awoo in order all the time?
       -Always in order and un-finable?
   Standing rule that what Henry did is fine and to do what Henry did
       -Henry is, in fact, an institution
       -I'm not making that change
       -Change vowels to cannonize
   Committee of Alex kdsjlsj Duplicity
       -Identify and Veto motions that are double jeporady
       -3 to Bork

Real Announcements:

   POTLUCK- Freshmen don't need to be food
   UG Tour meeting on Wednesday 9:30 PM, UC 306?
   Solidarity Forever Fund exists
   We meet every Monday
   Exec meets Wed at 545 at probably UC 306