Minutes20130916
From KGB Wiki
OFFICER REPORTS
Broman
had a weekend
there was the event, which was good
R7 party on saturday was a lot of fun
there's an email where he can tell us about that?
did work on Sunday
the Packers beat the Redskins
which is HILARIOUS because Bubbles is in town
didn't do enough work on 210
Caroline
had a weekend
involved the first 3 things that Broman's did
it was a lot like Broman's weekend
spent a lot of time with Broman and Caroline this weekend
JRAM
had a weekend
involved similar things (event and r7 party)
r7 party proceeded without incedent...
worked a lot on compilers but not enough
EVENT
Running Jumping Climbing Trees (Drew)
Friday, 6:30, Flagstaff
Marlena
Submit to pravda!
Zora
had a weekend
was sick for half of it, couldn't talk for all of it
maybe it's still the weekend since they still can't really talk
(it's not the weekend)
Dillon
had a weekend
see Broman's weekend except with different games at GBGC
also still has a lot of work
Mike
had a weekend
involved playing card games
catan ended bitterly
got on a bus for 6 hours to grandmother's house
ate too much grandmother food, which is really good food
drove back for only 5 hours
(got a new car)
COMMITTEE REPORTS
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists: There's a window open at the top of the black tower at the edge of town
Benjamin S Wolf Memorial Committee: before the age of the internet & telegraph, people communicated through psychics.
someone wanted to talk to their dead father...
it was glaive pun
fuck everything
Committee to Warn President of Impending Doom: Xander is prepared.
Xander is REALLY prepared.
Committee to Assassinate the President: incredible potential
Daniel John Secret Southerner Committee: offroading in geagle parking lot is possible
KGB Rocks the 80s Committee: music!
ad hoc KGB Music Awards: nominates JRAM
ad hoc Don't Worry It's For Science Committee: approves whatever R7 was drinking last weekend
ad hoc Alternative History Moonshine Committee: he blinded me with science
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists reports an edit: A tower has appeared at the edge of town (it repels bone. not flesh. bone)
All of dkirby's committees, as well as the Committee to Explore Pittsburgh, some other ones, and the Bolth Committee: dkirby went running and cycling this weekend. both
Benjamin S. Wolf Memorial Committee: foreshadowing pun
misappropriated Spontanious Shark Puns Committee: requests a report
ad hoc Society of Intrepid Journalists reports a further clarification: tower coming out of GIANT EARTH BEAST'S face. There's weeping coming from the window
Alcoholist Committee: made 2 new tasty drinks, doesn't remember what they were
OLD BUSINESS
The Thing
everything that isn't Skye's fault isn't Skye's fault this week
NEW BUSINESS
Committee to Pee in Mike's Car: to at least give some good reason for the smell
what if the seats are made out of jellyfish tentacles
change name and purpose to "Establishment of a New Public Restroom Committee: to pee in Mikes car"
PASSED
motion to replace all the fabric in Mike's car with jellyfish tentacles
out of order
change all instances of "Mikes car" to "my scar"
FAILS
change all "Mikes car" to "my scarf"
FAILS
Bubbles really wants to pee in Mikes car
change all instances of "Mike's car" to "Jack's van"
PASSES
replace "Jack's van" with "Dan's bike"
FAILS
remove all instances of "in"
FAILS
PASSES
$3 to Bubbles, Mike's car will chair
Thomas Wright Memorial Committee: dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks; also, disband all $2 committees
change purpose to "to kill Thomas Wright"
FAILS
change purpose to "wait until Thomas Wright dies and then erect a giant penis statue"
APPENDED
change all instances of "penis" and "dicks" to "bug mars"
PASSES
motion to remove this committee's shirt
motion to remove this committee's pants
Drew's sorry couldn't hit the harmony's, he had performance anxiety
FAILS
The Society of Intrepid Journalists: would like to report stuff about the tower and the beast (it's gone but the window's still there)
Change name to "The Lovecraftian Filibuster Committee"
PASSES
change all instances of "intrepid" to "apathetic"
FAILS
Xander has a talent for something, Bubbles doesn't know what that something is, but it sure is something
motion to replace Xander with jellyfish tentacles
FAILS
motion to get Xander a job at the Tartan
replace all instances of "window" with "the moist demanding chasm of his mouth"
PASSED
change name to "50 Shades of Xander Committee"
PASSED
ABSTAINED
$8 to Drew, JRAM and Drew will chair
CMU KGB Intrepid Journalism Committee: to get off campus and see the sights
change name to "Freshmen Intervention or Normal People Committee"
PASSES
change name to "KGB Goes on a Kindergarten Field Trip Committee"
PASSES
ad hoc KGB is Now in Preschool Committee: will we be having naptime and juice after this?
50 Shades of Xander Committee: need a chaperone?
change purpose to "PUPPIES?"
APPENDED AND STOLEN
what if Broman was Ms. Frizzle
what if that
append "it's so fluffy I'm gonna die" to the purpose
PASSES
$3 to Caroline, she shall chair--as will anyone who explores and steals puppies for her
That Sounds Better Than the Original Committee: to create such things as 50 Shades of Xander and the Nightmare Before That Day Where We Were All Really Tired
an oreo milkshake
pride and prejudice and zombies
sense and sensiblility and seamonsters
I can't believe it's not butter
dessert bus two
ghost shark two: urban jaws
electric bugaloo
change name to "Really Bad Movies"
fails
snakes...on every plane!
the squeaquel
51 shades of xander
a second serving of tortellini
bug jupiter
speed 2: cruise control
disney's star wars??
PASSES
$3 to Paul, every shade of Xander will chair
motion to create the Committee For Haikus: for self reference
even this acronym
Bubbles is killing some time for people to think of haikus
motion to nominate bubbles as hero of the poeple
refrigerator, refrigerator haiku, refrigerator
if you think I'm writing the filibuster text you're probably drunk
like, really drunk
PASSES
$2 to afrieder, everybody will chair
motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for supplies for the event
PASSES
Good Game Committee: to congratulate well mannered opponents for games that were played well
change name to "the Drewisms Committee"
PASSES
ad hoc Committee for Freshmen to Confuse the Rest of Us: success
change all syllables to korean equivalent
FAILS fuck you
append qq more to purpose
PASSES
append diaf
FAILS
append asl
FAILS
append a flipped table to purpose
PASSES
modify flipped table to mini fipped table
PASSES
PASSES
$4 to Drew, Drew will chair
That's What She Said Committee: if you finish someone's sentence, that's what they meant to say
nope
KGB Is Now In Preschool Committee: thanking Xander for putting us all to sleep
caroline gives Xander a 1 out of 10
PLOT TWIST Bubbles reads a thing
no
lorum ipsum dolor set
and that's what I have memorized you can google the rest
notice that this is very empty and boring
that is because someone is reading something
and I do not care
append "i am a full time internet" to purpose
PASSES
I think JRAM is quoting a thing WITH YELLING
PASSES
$2 to Drew
That Picture of Mike Sleeping Was Way More Important Than The Minutes Committee: apparently the point of this is web apps
there's a chrome extention that will change all pictures on a website to ryan gosling
there's a chrome extention that will change all instances of "the cloud" on a page to "my butt"
PASSES
$2 to drew, disbanded
Extra:
ANNOUNCEMENTS
EVENT
Running Jumping Climbing Trees
Friday, 6:30, Flagstaff
you'll do all of those at the same time (you shouldn't do all of those at the same time)
exec is now in Wean 5312
Tuesdays at 6:30
dues! pay them!
BOOTH
we'll vote on Booth in the next month
we need to know who booth chairs can be before that
have to have paid your student activities fee and be a member in order to work/vote on Booth
you should talk to exec (or email them) and/or come to the exec meeting
grads can't be on midway
eforney can tell you more about that
SCHMUCKS
Xander
Xander why
TOC is in the next couple days
it sucks
go, it's important
NSA is recruiting you, if you're interested you'll get an email soon
purple and gtfo
