Minutes20151123
From KGB Wiki
OFFICER REPORTS
Mike had a weekend they think spent a lot or time in many different coffee shops skye had a weekend is now sick began with light up night other things no sleep at all dillon had a weekend started with difusing bumbs moved into whatever he did saturday and sunday EVENT we don't have one (get out of campus) no but really we can't book rooms but if you want to do movies somehere do that thing erin had a weekend fall concert and itr but she was sick :C is finally regaining her voice and recovering zora (owen) feeling about a comic that took 48 hours joe malloc pamelas ninjas? Death by malloc No bad pun - literally said "Go fuck yourselves" instead Owen - Can I have my dollar back? (notably before committee reports) murphy compilers diffusing bombs compilers i lost track murphy needs to take better care of himself
COMMITTEE REPORTS
booth in conj with swear of the week request that you GO TO THE FUCKING BOOTH MEETING there isn't one this weekend but uh GO TO THE NEXT ONE
roomba army v upset about thanksgiving cleanup my left hand dylan should not punch the desks committee to never leave committee reports sometimes it's fun to have reports and just kinda do it, but sometimes there just isn't stuff to do with it misap filabuster rports misap sportswear owen got a new shirt pittsburgh phantoms very real, played roller hocky for one season in 1994 ad hoc def misap shitty sweaters harry's sweater was $6 and has rabbits fucking on it knitting in conj with shitty sweaters on ravelry there's a patter for deer fucking ad hoc shitty clothes more success at filabustering than the filabuster committee
OLD BUSINESS
the Thing! nika's body breaking down due to lack of nutrition on sunday is not nika's fault tabletop athiesm: fuck you and your eldritch lightening motion to table for one hour PASSES committee that fails for lack of a second: reverse psych works on the kgb motion to change everything, just everything like, same, but dilatory change name and purpose to "everything: just everythign" PASSES PASSES $3 to Kelly, everyone will chair
NEW BUSINESS
ugly clothing committee: to create, wear, and celebrate all forms of ugly clothing (holdiay related or not) ad hoc committee to borrow pants from your roommate would like to report pending success motion to append "deer fucking" to purpose PASSES erin won 3 prizes for her christmas shirt PASSES $1 to erin, anybody who creates/modifies clothing to make it uglier 2am IHOP: to go to IHOP at 2am motion to replace all IHOP to Waffle House FAILS replace all ihop with "ihop and or waffle house" PASSES are there any waffle houses in allegheny counted no there are some in adjoining counties delete "or" in purpose PASSES change purpose to "ihopthatreallygooddinerkindofdownmystreetwafflehouse" apparently the waffle house adventure was a mess eat n park closes at 3am ritters is no longer open 24 hours frick park never closes almost everything in oakland closes around 2am which is fristrating when your options are mcdonalds and rite aid PASSES $2 to Erin, anybody who goes to midnight trips to waffle house (not ihop) committee not to be sold for more than 5 dollars: pretty much that PASSES $6 to Owen, whoever collects those 6 dollars will chair (so joe) (we'll see) everything committee approves motion to create the dollar we gonna form a mint dilatory motion to pick a specific dollar already created by a specific organization legally creating those and name it The Dollar but we're not defacing it nope, nope, joe wrote on it FAILS motion to fork owencoin owencoin is a pseudocurrency which has a words words words owen words owencoin you have to ask owen for them he'll either give you them or not so basically owen is your dad and this fake money is your allowance dilatory owencoin: steal owens computer the owen coin is entirely bubble-based currency but what a bubble it can be PASSES $9 to owen, craig will chair committee not ot be sold for more than $10: worth a try it's a good idea change all 10 to 1 million passes motion to table this committee for 22 minutes PASSES if someone makes a motion to table, can you alter that? it has to fail first, then you repropose it motion to create a stack system where people can respond to a table motion for a table motion with another table motion dear lord committee for temp lap blankets: solaris so as the weather gets colder, glenn just adds more and more blankets motion to change purpose to ???? FAILS motion to change purpose to solaris and sweaters PASSES PASSES $1 to erin, anybody who does any sort of fibercraft or uses solaris motion to make kgb's actions as a whole spaceworthy redundant waht the actions endorsed by the kgb as an org: everything change name to accountability PASSES change purpose to "this committee is responsible for the actions of the kgb as an org" passes change name to "a count ability" fails CHANGE name to "minutes of the current meeting, up to this point" FAILS change name to "skye toor" fails PASSES $1 to erin, everyone who works in student affairs crowdsource a surname: this committee will decide what skyes new last name will be because skye toor is not a good name for a person "skyetoor" motion to insert at least on silent x motion to recursively call skyes full name as the surname either "dickbutt" or "bugmars" change "person" in purpose to "mighty warrior" PASSES $6 to owen, owen and skye's new surname is TV autocannibalmaker committee: no as a scientist, erin has taken a class or two about electrons she can tell you that you're wrong what would this committee's opinion be on cannibal ogres none when owen ta'd 251, he was personally responsible for NOT giving this assignment PASSES $1 to harry, harry will, surname should be net techy parents: zora's dad was a unix hotshot in the 90s. he is not anymore. harry's mom was trying to do voiceovers for an antismoking add "the googlebutton" "geezerbeepers" "totally amazeballs" nika's mom just decided to become a programmer she was a badass OH GOD PARENT SEX STORY nerds are great ad hoc every comic from xkcd actually happened committee reports success alumni need to calm down PASSES $2 to erin, every ab tech alumni ever motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for supplies for assassins PASSES what's worms' fault this week: to assign random events in the world to worms so like, whatever the person who has the thing isn't at fault for is worms' fault it's all his fault anyway wow this got mean PASSES $5 to worms, worms will chair write an L on the chalkboard, think about it for a while, then erase it: whatever joe did now there's a Q it's a good idea fair x y 12 turte (no l) PASSES $1 to craig, joe and anyone who's ever written an l on a chalkboard committee on the purpose of bombs and symbols: to identify certain things SO: think hard about what you want to call this symbol EVERYBODY YELLED owen hates it, vote no ad hoc commmittee to have everything translated to english would like to motion to change name and purpose to "the committee on symbols: name the thing" PASSES owen likes the new name, vote yes the kgb all together plays keep talking and nobody explodes everybody gets one third of a page of the manual PASSES $4 to dillon, all bomb diffusal experts will chair motion to create a standing rule where owencoin means dollars only in the auction context, and no math tax this is confusing and i am not want so owen's just gonna be doing everyone's math hw someone tried to ask the python creator if he would help them with their math hw he said "only if they would pay him 3k an hour" TAKING FROM THE TABLE the committee to not be sold for more than 1 million dollars change name to the commmittee not to be sold for under 1m illion owencoins fails motion to table for 1 week like, exactly 1 week PASSES tim has a spreadsheet BACK TO STANDING RULE PASSES
ANNOUNCEMENTS
apparently exec is at 7:30 today no event go away we're gonna play assassins email or talk to skye to sign up pay for your shit owen doesn't
SCHMUCKS
xander has started a cult bring your blood erin will not be getting burnch on sunday if you wnana to afternoon food, hit her up nomik it hates you the family game of legislative procedure talk to owen there will be an online game starting over break talk about initial rule changes now, or get really mad in december also talk to him about ihop pride clothes! allies is selling them go to allies.cmu.edu