Minutes20160222

EXEC REPORTS

   Mike
       had a weekend
       sleeping
       second twitter account
           MORE ANIME
       that was about it
       
   Skye
       had a weekend
       ctfws was awesome
       a little work
       then r7
       then more not enough work
       new people
           maxwell (max), business, oregon, fave color blue
           sarah, mech e, san diego, wearing pants
   
   Dillon
       had a weekend
       started with ctfws
           it went great
           nothing wrong whatsoever
       then BUGGY
       then planning r7 then r7
       then MORE BUGGY
       anyway
       EVENT
           Video Game Night
               Friday, 7:00, WEH 5300 corridor
               Bring yourselves! bring your games! play your games!
               please list what you'll be bringing--we'll make a spreadsheet
                   it'll be at www.cmukgb.org/games
   
   Erin
       had a weekend
       started with ctfws
       it was a thing that happened that was fun
       finally made a new years resolution
           maybe the finished knitting will come back from the war
       harry: SUBMIT TO PRAVDA
   
   Zora
       had a weekend
       slam dunked their first thesis draft
           5k words and about half done, hella
       let's not talk about the rest of the weekend   
       
   Joe
       had a weekend
       r7 went p well
       kinda died
           slep
       
   Murphy
       had a weekend
       joe can confirm

COMMITTEE REPORTS

   committee to question 2vp's grammar
       who gives a flip prescriptivists
   
   swear of the week committee
       BRUNG
   
   BOOTH
       builds
       people showed up!
       more people need to show up!
       we need art!
       you can paint within the lines
       times!
           thurs 6:30-9:30
           sat starting at 2
           sun starting at 1:30
   
   ad hoc shit i read in a schoolwide email
       cm has finally settled it's lawsuit with marvel
       subra suresh is gonna be in avengers 3
   
   misap welcome to hell
       raymond brought a guest
       in the form of
       his phone
       and a recording
   
   gay communist gun club in conj with kgb rifle assoc
       prepping for next nerf war
   
   committee to not burn down r7
       continued lack of failure

OLD BUSINESS

   the Thing!
       video game night is not worms's fault this week
   
   old business reluctantly calls for the orders of the day
   
   motion to make an allocation not to exceed 50c to buy an apple to put worms in
       skye will give joe 50c to end this
       wait she already did by violent coin throwing proxy
       done!
       joe will reimburse you for the apple
           please bring a receipt
           it's cash just bring the receipt
   
   IoS committee
       will buy this apple
   
   note: this only applies to the first person who buys joe and apple
       FRIEDER SPRINTS OUT OF THE ROOM

NEW BUSINESS

   committee to celebrate frieder's absence: pretty much that
       change purpose to: no more mixups
           passes
       in b4 mike calls mike frieder
       replace frieder with murphy in name
           passes
   passes
   $2 harry, "me, owen" will chair

BACK TO OFFICER REPORTS

   skye
       new people
           evan, ece, baltimore, wearing brown pants

BACK TO NEW BUSINESS

   point of information
       frieder has apple and recipt
       joe will reimburse him for 50c of that 75c apple
       though technically he could do less?
           no
           no
       worms is in the apple
   
   when i was a young people: too interesting things
       harry didn't place in a rubik's cube compitition
       dylan's hand wasn't raised when the q was callle
   passes
   $3 to erin, nonfreshmen will chair
   
   running really far: really dumb jokes
       does anyone want anything from entropy
           harry wants peanut butter pretzels
           (nah)
   PASSES
   
   reversal (?): so worms put the apple inside of worms
       i'm sorry i'm dealing with dates stuff rn
       minutes are crappy
       i'm sorry worms your joke was v good
   PASSES
   $1 to worms, the apple will chair
   
   duck sleuthing agency: if you have a duck, we will find you
       quack
       looks like a duck and it quacks like a duck we will find you
       squeak
       does this mean we can replace expensive stuff with just a duck
           maybe
       change prupsoe to "take all teh ducks from assassins and build horse sized duck"
           FAILS
       is this a duck as defined in article 2 section 1 part k of our bylaws
           that's it!
       change purpose to "finding one horse sized duck to use for assassins in the future
           fails
       change assassins to juggernaut?
           like the concept
           nah
       is this a duck as defined on the duck page of our wiki?
           "we are nippersinkers, we're in luck..."
           now you see why skye wants them all back
       kgb wiki page for duck edidted in 2006
           by eyore, who joined kgb in 1989
   PASSES
   $3 to skye, all who run from and run assassing
   
   unconventional pets: madison humane societies are weird
       zora's been getting snapchats of a pet pig for like a week
       erin saw a girl with her pet duck with her on a leash
           it followed her around
           was this a duck as defined in...
       harry doesn't know who he is, but
           there is a man on this campus who always wears the same clothes and always caries a tiny toy poodle in his jacket
           his name is todd
       frieder saw people walking GIANT PIGS
       there's a couple who takes turns walking their dogs
           but they're not really dogs
           they're more like living clouds
           one has its own instagrams
           (mari can confirm)
           does the instagram include dog food?
       if we define a pet as something that sheds a lot: dylan's roommate
       if the cloud of animals eats food that dissolves in their mouth what happens
           puddles
       once cliff's friend brought her pet piper to school
           piper was a snake
       glenn knew a python who loved books and hated math teachers
       erin's cat will constantly lick mac power cables
           but only when they're plugged in
           frieder is not shocked
               eyyyyyyyyyyyyy
   PASSES
   $1 to harry, kgb furries committee will chair
   
   committeee on mismatched christopher walken quotes: "i hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass for more than two years. i just got to have more cowbell"
       worms: this is a thing that the kgb as an organization needs
           dillon: NO
   PASSES
   $1 to frieder, disbanded
   
   why do the emus have external ears
       those are coyotes
       MIKE HAS MET AN EMU
   
   monthly reminder that the great emu war was a thing
       and australia lost
   
   motion to make an allocation not to exceed $50 for supplies for this week's event
       PASSES
   
   5:01 committee: frieder's gonna collect committees every time no one has an idea
       motion to append "(c)(3)"
           sure
           what
       is this a non-profit as defined in article 1 section 3 of our bylaws
       wait can we register the kgb as a nonprofit
       we might get in trouble with the communist control act of some time
       SKYE INTERVIEWED WITH THE FEDERAL RESERVE AND THEY NOTICED THAT SHE WAS PART OF THE KBG
       we have more than 1 prev kgb member working at the nsa rn
   PASSES
   $1 to frieder, frieder will chair
   
   mythic pokemon: cerberus, cerberus!
       if you go back and do the understanding of the word
           the lord of the underworld
           named his dog spot
       cerberus most powerful attack is k-destroy
           it was super effective
       report from dillon: cerberus is a shitty nightmare
       these are computer words
       okay frieder's plan would work
           (made up fake computer language)
           (but then the words might have actual meaning?)
           (if they correlate with words that are actually used)
           (so then it's just a language that a bunch of nerds use)
           (which is the same as cs jargon anyway)
       harry and his friends built a computer
           and made "yeah man that's so danglin'" catch on
               how and why
       GNU!
           gnu might be a neopet
   PASSES
   $6 to erin, all non-cs, ece, or is majors
   
   motion to untable the out of order committee
       so. moved?
       okay but which
       there are two
   FAILS
   
   moon and earth are not defined in our bylaws
       frieder requests to overturn the deision of the chair
       FAILS
   
   motion ot untable the out of order committee
       no we just failed at that
   
   motion to break a table
       we did that week ago
   
   motion to untable the in order committee
       so moved
       change name to out of order
           passes
       change name to disorder
           fails
       eh
   PASSES
   $42 to murphy, DISBANDED
   
   out of order committee
       dilatory
   
   the committee for old busin
   
   committee to make tim regret that sentence: maniacal laughing
       table for one weke
           fials
       motion ot overturn decision of the chair
           that sure failed
       j bonaparte committee really really approves
       motion to table for two weeks
           fails
   FAILS
   
   out of border: where donald trump wants all the mexicans
       motion to table this comitee unitl the first meeting after the general election
           passes
       tim is writing that down
   
   committee for good new business: not this it's too meta
       it's a GOOD idea
       it's a good idea
       it's a good idea
       motion to create the out of order committee, motion to tbale it for two weeks
           OUT OF ORDER
       it's a good idea
       it's probably objectively a kind of bad idea but has that ever stopped us before
       motion to table for two weeks
           that failed for real
       motion to overtun the decision of the chair
           that was the decision
   PASSES
   $3 to joe, people with better new business will chiar
   
   dilatory commitee: waiting to see what will happen
       cahnge name to "dillon tory" and purpose to "english politics:
           passes
       change "english to "american politics"
           passes
       change "american" to bugmars
           passes
       change bugmars to freedomland
           passes
       change purpose to "friederland"
           dilatory
       change freedomland to worms's wordbarf
           passes
           y'all did this to yourself
   PASSES
   $2 to brian, brian and all teh expats fo slamzone

ANNOUNCEMENTS

   EVENT
       Video Game Night
           Friday, 7pm, WEH 5300 corridor
           bring game
           play game
           list game on spreadsheet
               www.cmukgb.org/games
   ctfws folowup
       there's a meeting
       today, 8pm, wean 8427 (judge's room)
   
   nomcom
       meeting this week
       they'll open nominations next week
       think of people to nominate
   
   exec meetings
       4:30 uc 306

SCHMUCKS

   danger 5
       talk to skye
       it's good
       watch it
   
   scs day is on friday
       murphy'll be there
           juggling!
       come by
       computer club will be there
       frieder will watch
   
   mike actually talks to our advisor pretty often
       not about kgb
   
   brian will bring artemis to video game night
       dillon'll see if he can get the windows cluster
   
   vogel, in physics:
       "the only positive thing about jumping off a bridge is the work gravity does on you"

we are now in purple