Minutes20190909

OFFICER REPORTS

   DEZ - Strange, and full of much E&M. Actually mostly that. Oh god.
   
   JANNY - Had a weekend. Wasn't here
   
   MITCHEL - Parent's came over, and we have an event! (Very related, yes?). Come to the black chair thingies. You know them. Probably. After that, we eat. Dress Inconspicuously.
   
   MCKENNA - Hit one year with Connor (yay!). Had lots of homework
   
   WOODY - Wrote stuff, had lots of homework, did none
   
   KUSHAL - Won a boardgame by killing everyone.

COMMITTEE REPORTS

   HENRY - STUPID HISTORY
   
   LIAM - Corn subsidies board - corn is the lowest it will ever be. BUY NOW.
   
   KELLY - MLK memorial - hearing things in our sleep.
   
   TIM - Furry committees report - finally, soon means soon.
   
   LIAM - CORN AGAIN - LOTS OF CORN
   
   HENRY - Committee to burn down R7 - Show up and burn down R7! (Not a party) (Some kind of D-list? What? What is that? No one knows)
   
   JANNY - Stupid power rangers facts committee - Monster of the week - He is a robot comedian, who's signature move is stand up and eject his abdominal muscles into the ground. (WHAT)
   

OLD BUSINESS

   The thing? Where is it? Not here. KATE.
   Who gets the spirit of the thing? Kaylie! It's her fault that her cat bullies Dez, though.
   
   ORDERS OF THE DAY
   April 22 - Discussion of a motion to create the archive memorial committee D
       Liam - Make your own damn jokes
       Herny - Requesting a report from Rauen
       Janny - Motion to change the purpose to "Mourn it's death". Passed.
       Liam - Motion to append "o7" to the end. Passed.
       James - Motion to append "F"
   Passed, sold to Tim, chaired by Tim, Rauen, and other Tim's in the future.
   
   April 27 - Create your own jokes committee
   Tabled indefinitely
   
   Motion to play pot of greed
   Tabled for two weeks, hahaha
   

NEW JOKES

   Janny - Motion to create the your own jokes committee
   Purpose - To create my own jokes
   Passed, sold to Janny for $3, chaired by everyone owed jokes
   
   Tim - Motion to purple
   
   Ellen - Motion to \fan
   
   Henry - Motion to create the broken record committee
   Purpose - the broken record committee
   Failed
   
   Tim - motion to make liam mad
   This joke was good holy shit
   
   Kate - Motion to #define oposed as abstaining
   
   Tim - Motion to allocate $1.69 to Tim to pay him back
   
   Henry - Motion to craete the last mathematicians committee
   Purpose - Algorithms
   Failed, Cool cause I didn't get it all
   
   Janny - Motion to #define quack as squid
       Kate - motion to append exist as abstain, such that every motion passes by extension? No
       Liam - Motion to replace quack with *, and squid with abstention. NO
   Failed? Oh noes
   
   Motion to #define everything as abstention
   Passed
   
   Henry - Motion to create the committee against english
   Purpose - the body as a whole
   Passed, sold to Liam for $1, disbanded
   
   Mckenna - Motion to #define 'I'm confused and that's why I'm abstaining' as squid
   Passed
   
   Liam - Motion to strike all instances of roberts rules of order with bobbies parlimentary funtime procedures.
   Failed, thank god.
   
   Kate - Motion to purge the info abouthe bylaws from Liam's memory.
   
   Janny - Motion to #define Bobby's parlimentary funtime procedures as Bobert's rules of order.
   
   Tim - Motion to #define the Erskine May as the Erskine might not
       Henry - Not sure what's happening, relatable.
       Kate - Motion to use the presidential squeaky gable as the staff
       Liam - Move for a vote of no confidence on Dez
       Jasper - Motion to overthrow the tyrant Dez
   Failed
   
   Kushal - Motion to create the CMU Instagram pages
   Purpose - CMU Daddy thick is a real thing
   Passed, sold to Janny for $2, chaired by Daddy Thick
   
   Liam - Motion to #define a subcommittee as a committee that is attached to an existing committee, has a similar purpose to the original committee, and which is chaired by a subset of the chair of the original committee.
       Janny - POI, what is a similar purpose? Up to chair and general body on creation of subcommittee.
       Tim - POI, will subcommittees be guided by the same rules as regular committees?
       Kate - Motion to overthrow the Tyrant Dez
   Passed
   
   Woody - Motion to create a subcommittee to maim or possible injure the president
   Purpose - To maim or seriously injure the president
   Passed, sold to Liam for $5, chaired by the empty subset
   
   Henry - Create a subcommittee of the committee to assassinate the president called the committee for bribery and extortion
   Purpose - We have $20 allocated, Kushal, do you want it?
       Kate - Motion to rename the kgb as the concepts recitation.
   Passed, sold to Woody for $4, chaired by all chairs of the CTATP
   
   Mitchell - Allocating $200.69 for this weeks food and supplies
   4 Vinyls and 22 bushels of corn and $.69 for this weeks event
   Passed!
   

REAL AND RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENTS

   Dez - Exec! We meet on Wendesday at Baker Hall 140B at 4:30, our meetings are open and people can come! Bring us food!
   
   Mitchell - We have an event! UG Tour! Come. Dress inconspicuously.
   
   James - Pay Dues! Due it soon. They also make T-shirts cheaper.
   
   Kate - Motion to request info from Mitchell about what's happening after UG tour.
       Mitchell - We're grilling, so lots of things to eat. And drinks.
   
   Kate - We're grilling the drinks?
   

SCHMUCKS

   Henry - Party at 9PM! Show up! Talk to Me, Dez, or Liam if you need to get there.
   
   Tim - What is a baseball player in a hot air baloon? Batter up.
   
   Liam - Culinary standards committee would like to remind everyone about liquid icecream night is happening.
   
   Tim - What do you call a clown with a psych degree? A fun collegist
   
   Tim - motion to purple
   
   Liam - GTFO!