Minutes20230828
MEETING 8/28
Kevin: paolo alto
Avalon immigration fraud
New People!!!
david he/him cs paolo alto, breathes air
vuyani (sorry if spelling wrong) he/him texas, don’t go there, sometimes sees clouds
sanjeev he/him, fairfax VA, lives in pittsburgh
owen, he/him, art, has something at 5:30
sam, he/him, is, the color blue looks like blue to him
(sorry didn’t catch name) she/her, cincinatti ohio, knee hurts
owen #2, pittsburgh, architecture, saw mom today
kate, she/her, upstate ny, owns frying pan
isaac he/him, math, NJ, has blue phone
spencer (actually sean), stat ml second year, from south, has never once stepped on the moon
cyndy has ice (might’ve misheard) simon, they them, from DC, has nose on face
Danya, she/her, long island, mech e, minor in robotics, speaks english
sojo, eastern pa, any pronouns, neuroscience, goes to cmu
elizabeth, she/her, maryland, hair is shorter than 5 feet long
max, he/him, LA, mech e, puts socks on before shoes
katie, nj, she/her, math, woke up this morning
fry, he/him, immigrant, history major, into classics and (something)
sam, first year, bio major, currently attending first kgb meeting
javier, he/him, creative writing, is standing right now
Howard: I had a summer, spent time in middle of desert weathered area, this friday is potluck in the park, this friday at 6pm, meet at uc black chairs, walk to flagstaff
Also Underground Tour, next next friday (Sept 8th, 6 pm at black chairs), gonna take a tour around campus, tell stories cmu admin would frown upon them
Nick: worked at a company in scotland because live there, scotland is very rainy place, PRAVDA, please submit to Pravda, email, discord, uk phone number
nkeck@andrew.cmu.edu
mr_gustavo
Julia: pittsburgh, didn’t rain much, attendance
Theo: collected kremlin’s trash cat
Daniel: went home & rested “fixed” “my” “sleep” “schedule” bouldered with sister
COMITTEE REPORTS
Tim: corn subs & block subs: corn has cratered 4.79 bushel, blocks going for 1d4+3 5.50, 1.15 corn
Twain: culinary standards, closed fuku, excited for new north craig street boba shop
Avalon: mis cats are stupid: theo’s cat is cute, not stupid
Theo: amend he tried to jump onto the fridge and bit my arm
Teadora: comittee of mostly confused engineers: less confused about engineering now
Aresh: animal facts: scallops have about 200 eyes
anthony: mis plants: I have found plants to misappropriate, will bring to next gbm
Twain: animal facts: 1:1 ratio of snakes to snake penises, half of snakes do not have penises
Javier: reference finding committee: reference to something hank green
Keerthana: Hivemind: we would get food if only you were paying me end report
Avalon: orcas are scary
Izzy: baby orcas look pink because not enough fat to cover arteries
Kate: orcas are one of only known animals not humans to have a culture
Howard: mis let’s move on: unsubscribe
Tim: wailord
Keerthana: spotted lantern flies not true flies
Izzy: lanternflies are called that because of whacked out german biologist that they should light up, they don’t
Tim: lantern flies have weird eyes
Izzy: humans have weird eyes, optic nerve crosses straight in front of iris, has
Keerthana: has thing
Anthony: wants thing, not fault, all those lantern flies, is fault: being back to class
ORDERS OF THE DAY
Order of the day committee with purpose to be tabled until next week
tabled for one week…
NEW BUSINESS
Avalon: motion to create the Kevin’s house intrusion comittee “finding out the location of Kevin’s house and intruding upon it”
Howard: kevin without the hat is evin
Cindy: if you took kevin’s hat and put it on someone else, would you have to intrude on their house
Avalon: hat does not define kevin
Robert: if you split kevin into five pieces and then transpose them through rotations…
Howard: motion to append to purpose to be “identify who kevin is”
Farnam (simon): if someone else is wearing kevin’s hat is that person then kevin for the purpose of this comittee
Avalon: wearing the hat adds k to the person’s name
vuyani: if hat pulverized and spread across the world, would evin be kevin
Avalon: would need to retain its hat -ness
Kate: if we were to remove the brim of the hat?
Howard: you are forgetting the very obvious hoodie that defines kevin
Sean: if we took half and half and half of Kevin’s hat
Danya: if we make a million tiny hats out of the hat, would all be kevin
Robert: ship of theseus’ing hat
Danya: if you put the hat on a dog…
Passed
Kevin: auctions are for real money
sold for $4.75 to anthony, chaired by “I’ll see you tonight Kevin”
Theo: motion to create the kill the lanternflies committee “to show avalon that lantern flies deserve no mercy”
Avalon objects
Nick: motion to salute avalon
Sean: point of information: wtf avalon
Keerthana: killing things should be hard even if they’re annoying things
Rand: they’re an invasive species, not killing them is killing native soecies
Izzy: specifically they’re harming agriculture not any native species
Sean: nuance is bad
Vuyani: they harm forestry mostly
Izzy: someone’s losing money
Avalon: as tepper student now understand
Sold for 4$ to Sam, chaired by Avalon
Teddy: motion to create a standing rule such that any time someone gives an animal fact they have to make the sound of that animal
Twain: what if the animal doesn’t make a noise
Cindy: have to imitate voice of person when talk
Jonathan: something something about humans being called animals?
Tim: something something fun kevin fact
Daniel: standing rules need consequences committee: please add a consequence
Isaac: if you’re talking about multiple animals at once, do you need to make all at once
Anthony: motion to amend such that if you fail to make the animal noises you have to stand up and say yeehaw
Sean: if you don’t know what animals sound like
Teddy: say yeehaw
Nick: motion to amend such that if the animal does not have an easily reproducible sound, you say “awooga”
Friendly, been changed
Avalon: should the general body not be satisfied with your yeehaw, you have to go to the corner of shame.
Teddy: If someone notices that there was no noise or that the incorrect noise was made, they can point it out
Final standing rule: motion to create a standing rule such that any time someone gives an animal fact they have to make the sound of that animal. If you fail to make the animal noises you have to stand up and say yeehaw. if the animal does not have an easily reproducible sound, you say “awooga”.
Passed, been stood
Yara: motion to make the barbie committee “to appreciate everything in the barbie universe, including the 43 movies that are out”
Something something oppenheimer japan
Would oppenheimer have been a ken
Elise: he’s an alan, alan has also killed people
Avalon: new people:
sherlock, tepper, hi avalon, hi sean, he/him, from nj, is an eagles fan (fighting erupts, then a hug), has hair
ethan, he/him, cit ece, from jersey, goes to cmu
duriah , she/her, any pronouns, from akron ohio, art major, minoring in neuroscience, has not seen any barbie movie, is currently able to see things
Sean: motion to append at least one playing of “I’m just ken at this meeting” (ill defined)
(withdrawn)
Passed, been made, sold for 5$ to Yara, chaired by “nicoise barbie” (???)
REAL & RELEVANT ANNOUNCEMENTS
Kevin: We r KGB, exec meetings, plan out events & booth things, have meetings on Sundays at 4:15 in third floor of UC (306), we will be there
Discord is at cmukgb.org/discord
we have dues, if you want to vote in elections, or other important votes, talk to theo about paying them (15/sem, 20/year, 69/hour (which we cannot accept))
After sept 30th your membership is lapsed & then you’re not a dues paying member until you pay dues
Howie: potluck in the park, bring food, if not fresh to org/freshman/have kitchen
Kevin: There’s a signup spreadsheet in discord
SCHMUCKS
Theo: motion to purple
Anthony: still has a song out on streaming services, made 15$ in 3 years of it being out, will post it again in the discord
Tim: motion to purple purple seafoam green & call avalon
Avalon: motion to gitfo
