Nsaphra

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Naomi refuses to edit her own wiki page because she feel that editing one's own wiki page is the mark of some sort of uncultured brute. Therefore, I will note some objective truths about Naomi because she cannot fight back:

  • Born and raised as a turtle
  • Never eats cucumbers on Thursdays, eats nothing but cucumbers on Mondays.
  • Committed between one and six felonies, each of them falling between Martin Luther King Jr's Birthday (observed) and Presidents Day.
  • Recorded a ska cover of Pat Benatar's "Love is a Battlefield" but won't show it to anyone.
  • Forgot her keys at home.
  • Has three brothers, all of them named Phillip.
  • Runs on AAA batteries.
  • Her favorite US Constitution amendment is the twenty-fourth.
  • Ghost wrote "The Sound and the Fury."
  • Richard Pryor is her great uncle.
  • Travels randomly between time periods and worlds, thus contributing to her inability to function fully according to the rules of our world.
  • Has never seen the circus.